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Holding Child Back

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Jacksmommy
My love muffin!

Member since 1/07

5819 total posts

Name:
Liz

Re: Holding Child Back

Posted by jaclyn78

I think parents are looking out for their own child, without worrying about other children in the classroom. Let's face it, you want the absolute best for them. You want to start them on the right foot. You don't want them to be frustrated because they might have a hard time "catching up". I see it all the time, and it's sad. Yes, there are definitely 4 year olds ready for kindergarten. But, then there aren't. For some of you who are so against this and thinks that it's the parent's initiative to have their child excel, have a solo in their concert, be the quarterback of a football team, I can honestly say that is not me. I want my daughter to have a positive experience and have a LOVE for learning. Yes, I want her to be challenged. And, there are programs in the school to help her with that. If she doesn't want to do sports, so be it. I truly don't care. What matters most is what is best for my children and to have an amazing experience in her schooling. Can I guarantee that? No, but I can sure try to start her on a good foot to get there. I'm not pushing her in because she's "of age". I'm putting her in her first year of grade school when I feel she is ready to handle a full day kindergarten. I don't know about other districts. However, I feel that there isn't a heck of a lot of playtime. Our classrooms certainly do not have play kitchens, dress up, or dolls. Last year in preschool, she barely talked to anyone. This year, she is raising her hand, made some great friends, and loves to tell her teacher about EVERYTHING!!!! That's what I was waiting for. For her to come out of her shell and be her independent person.



But you don't think she would have done that in Kindergarten? Or, do you think it is just because her second year at that school so she is more comfortable? Than what will happen when she goes to K next year? And since you said she is academically doing work that you (a first grade teacher) bring home NOW, don't you think that she is going to be BORED in K next year? And by not having them ever frustrated, what, then are we teaching a child? That you should never be challenged in life? As a high school teacher, I see this all the time. These kids take the EASY way out the majority of the time. And unfortunately, parents today are assisting them in making those bad choices.

Message edited 1/3/2013 8:43:44 PM.

Posted 1/3/13 8:41 PM
 

Jacksmommy
My love muffin!

Member since 1/07

5819 total posts

Name:
Liz

Re: Holding Child Back

Posted by computergirl


I also would theorize that maybe the curriculum and expectations for today's kindergarteners are too demanding, if so many appropriately-aged kids are being held back for fear of struggling with the work.



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I TOTALLY agree with this statement.

Posted 1/3/13 8:42 PM
 

jellybean78
:)

Member since 8/06

13103 total posts

Name:
Mommy

Holding Child Back

I may get flamed for this but these are just my opinions/observations. I don't live on LI I live in NYC and honestly IMO the competition is out of control. When did K become about being the best? I thought K was a place where kids went to interact, learn their ABCs and the basics. Most kids SHOULD start off on or about the same level and be able to learn and grow together. There is a HUGE difference in a 5 YO and a 6 YO, not only size wise and maturity wise but also in what they are able to learn and retain. As kids get older, their personalities and capabilities expand as they should, so why is it fair for a 5YO and 6YO to be in the same class and have their abilities compared?

I see it so much here where I live. Parents obsessing for kids to be in G&T. Apparently the test became so easy and so many kids qualified that this year the DOE changed the test to make it more challenging. Why? Because parents were prepping. Not just reading to their kids and teaching them the basics but full out paying $$$ tuition to classes where their kids are prepped. So now we have a HUGE increase of "gifted" kids. When did this become norm?

Same goes for red shirting. It's the new thing to do to give your kid an advantage. It's the competition overshadowing the fact that these are 4 and 5 YOs..kids.

Here's the thing life is not fair. Someone will always be better, faster, smarter, etc. Your kids and mine will not always be the best or the smartest in the world. So what if they are not the first to write their name, read or learn math. Who cares. Barring disabilities a majority of them catch up anyway.

Posted 1/3/13 8:53 PM
 

jellybean78
:)

Member since 8/06

13103 total posts

Name:
Mommy

Holding Child Back

double post

Message edited 1/3/2013 9:01:04 PM.

Posted 1/3/13 8:53 PM
 

jellybean78
:)

Member since 8/06

13103 total posts

Name:
Mommy

Holding Child Back

double post

Message edited 1/3/2013 9:01:26 PM.

Posted 1/3/13 8:53 PM
 

Jacksmommy
My love muffin!

Member since 1/07

5819 total posts

Name:
Liz

Re: Holding Child Back

Posted by jacquig

I may get flamed for this but these are just my opinions/observations. I don't live on LI I live in NYC and honestly IMO the competition is out of control. When did K become about being the best? I thought K was a place where kids went to interact, learn their ABCs and the basics. Most kids SHOULD start off on or about the same level and be able to learn and grow together. There is a HUGE difference in a 5 YO and a 6 YO, not only size wise and maturity wise but also in what they are able to learn and retain. As kids get older, their personalities and capabilities expand as they should, so why is it fair for a 5YO and 6YO to be in the same class and have their abilities compared?

I see it so much here where I live. Parents obsessing for kids to be in G&T. Apparently the test became so easy and so many kids qualified that this year the DOE changed the test to make it more challenging. Why? Because parents were prepping. Not just reading to their kids and teaching them the basics but full out paying $$$ tuition to classes where their kids are prepped. So now we have a HUGE increase of "gifted" kids. When did this become norm?

Same goes for red shirting. It's the new thing to do to give your kid an advantage. It's the competition overshadowing the fact that these are 4 and 5 YOs..kids.

Here's the thing life is not fair. Someone will always be better, faster, smarter, etc. Your kids and mine will not always be the best or the smartest in the world. So what if they are not the first to write their name, read or learn math. Who cares. Barring disabilities a majority of them catch up anyway.



Chat Icon Chat Icon ITA!!! You said it wonderfully (even though you said it 3 times Chat Icon )

Posted 1/3/13 8:57 PM
 

jaclyn78
LIF Adolescent

Member since 11/06

635 total posts

Name:
Jaclyn

Re: Holding Child Back

Posted by Jacksmommy

Posted by jaclyn78

I think parents are looking out for their own child, without worrying about other children in the classroom. Let's face it, you want the absolute best for them. You want to start them on the right foot. You don't want them to be frustrated because they might have a hard time "catching up". I see it all the time, and it's sad. Yes, there are definitely 4 year olds ready for kindergarten. But, then there aren't. For some of you who are so against this and thinks that it's the parent's initiative to have their child excel, have a solo in their concert, be the quarterback of a football team, I can honestly say that is not me. I want my daughter to have a positive experience and have a LOVE for learning. Yes, I want her to be challenged. And, there are programs in the school to help her with that. If she doesn't want to do sports, so be it. I truly don't care. What matters most is what is best for my children and to have an amazing experience in her schooling. Can I guarantee that? No, but I can sure try to start her on a good foot to get there. I'm not pushing her in because she's "of age". I'm putting her in her first year of grade school when I feel she is ready to handle a full day kindergarten. I don't know about other districts. However, I feel that there isn't a heck of a lot of playtime. Our classrooms certainly do not have play kitchens, dress up, or dolls. Last year in preschool, she barely talked to anyone. This year, she is raising her hand, made some great friends, and loves to tell her teacher about EVERYTHING!!!! That's what I was waiting for. For her to come out of her shell and be her independent person.



But you don't think she would have done that in Kindergarten? Or, do you think it is just because her second year at that school so she is more comfortable? Than what will happen when she goes to K next year? And since you said she is academically doing work that you (a first grade teacher) bring home NOW, don't you think that she is going to be BORED in K next year? And by not having them ever frustrated, what, then are we teaching a child? That you should never be challenged in life? As a high school teacher, I see this all the time. These kids take the EASY way out the majority of the time. And unfortunately, parents today are assisting them in making those bad choices.



I honestly think she wouldn't have done that this year in kindergarten. I think she became much more comfortable for that second year. It's a different teacher, yes, they follow a similar curriculum as all preschools do. However, the activities and themes were much varied than last year, and she has an increased number of days. I bring home things now to expose her. (letter games, handwriting papers, color word recognition activities) I most definitely think she will be challenged in kindergarten. She will be learning how to put sounds together to make words, write complete sentences, recognize sight words, build her comprehension skills. There are soooo many skills that will be brand new to her. I don't think she will be bored. And if she did show signs of any type of boredom, I know exactly what my district has to offer her. We're talking about one year ahead. When I think of that, I think of building her social maturity, not her academics. I want her to understand that SHE is responsible for her learning and that mommy is not going to baby her all the way through high school. The difference in her self confidence has been remarkable this year, and I am so pleased that she will continue to blossom throughout the rest of her year and be excited for kindergarten. I just think it's unfair how you can write as if you know my or anybody else's child. Your actually stereotyping all 6 year olds, you realize that. And, you are also stereotyping us as parents. Just like you trust your instinct as a mom, I'm doing what's best for MY daughter.

Posted 1/3/13 9:42 PM
 

Kerie-is-so-very
versatile!

Member since 5/05

13535 total posts

Name:
K

Re: Holding Child Back

Posted by KarenK122

I wish I could see the demographics of the classes. Everyone is thinking that there are so many "red shirted" children in their class but I hardly think that is the truth. I would venture to bet there are no more than maybe 3 or so kids that are and in a class of 18 - 20 that really does not cause to much of an issue. Alot of these kids that people think are so much stronger and bigger might be Jan/Feb birthdays. I know in DD's class she is one of two that were held back last year and both of them have October birthdays. There are no kids in her class with birthdays earlier.



I was the one who mentioned size. The January-February birthdays are enough of a range to deal when you've got a kid born in October or November but even if there are only 3 kids in a class who are redshirted, ie older than the January-February birthdays, that does change the dynamic. It's not difficult to figure out the demographics of my son's class because no one is really hiding anything & we go to all the birthday parties. I just wish that parents were not inclined to reshirt if their main reason is because a lot of other people are doing it or because they might have the only young child. There are kids who are my son's exact age who are not present in his Kindergarten class because they are waiting for next year. I am lucky my son and his classmates really like each other in spite of age differences. I hope I am as lucky every year.

Message edited 1/4/2013 1:13:39 AM.

Posted 1/4/13 12:54 AM
 

chanmar
LIF Adolescent

Member since 7/07

499 total posts

Name:

Re: Holding Child Back

My feeling is the school system has a system for a reason, and everyone should just go along with it, because it will makes things easier for all. Plus, they have specials if your child needs a little extra help. It all catches up in the end. This is what we pay taxes for.

Posted 1/7/13 6:51 AM
 

Noem1881
LIF Infant

Member since 11/10

90 total posts

Name:
Noemi

Holding Child Back

As a school social worker you need to look at YOUR child to see what is best. I would say that holing a child out of K for a year because you want them to be at the top of the class is not right however if you feel as though they will struggle with the social demands and routine of K than maybe it is something to consider. I said this in another similar post, you need to go with what your gut is telling you. You know your child best!

Posted 1/7/13 1:10 PM
 

apb17
My guys

Member since 5/06

2173 total posts

Name:
Alli

Re: Holding Child Back

My son's bday is Nov. 30th and our district's cutoff is Dec 1. We decided to put him in a Catholic kindergarten and then had him repeat kindergarten in the public school the following year. It was the BEST decison we could have made for him.

The daycare he was in did not feel that being there another year would do much for him academically or developmentally. So we enrolled him in the Catholic school kindergarten program. He flourished there and now this year, he is so prepared and is doing so well. One of his biggest issues was that he was the youngest and smallest in his kindergarten class in the Catholic school. Although it sounds silly, it truly was an issue for him personally. The fact that he is one of the oldest kids now has helped his self esteem and really has done wonders for him. Academically, he is thriving. I was worried that he would be bored doing kindergarten all over again but so far he's not. Also, switching schools and repeating a grade was not an issue for him at all. There hasnt been any negative stigma attached to repeating a grade for his situation.

I don't regret our decision and I feel that giving him the extra year will forever benefit him socially and academically..

Posted 1/8/13 6:11 PM
 
Pages: << 2 3 4 [5]
 

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