would you throw yourself a shower ...rop?

soo i got to thinking last night after hanging out with some friends who are jewish.
i guess the tradition is NOT to have a baby shower before the baby comes if you follow the jewish traditions.
my dh and inlaws are jewish but i am not.
the only person who could throw me a shower would be my mil bc my parents are passed on..... but ....now i wonder if they are against it? and how would i find that out?

i was kinda thinking i wouldnt have a shower or maybe mil would offer to throw one down the road...but then someone reminded me of this issue and now i wonder

if i continue to be blessed with this baby...would you just throw yourself one..? or just register and pass the word on and not have a traditional shower?

kinda confused

thoughts?

Re: would you throw yourself a shower ...rop?

I'm in a somewhat similar spot because my mom is Jewish and followed the tradition of no showers for her pregnancies. It hasn't been brought up yet and I'm not sure if she's going to want to throw me a shower or not. I think if it's important to you and you really want one, there's nothing wrong with throwing your own shower. Maybe give it some time and see - for all you know she is already planning your shower!

Re: would you throw yourself a shower ...rop?

I am Jewish and didn't have a shower last time, nor have many people I know had one-- BUT, I do know of some people who did it, and maybe you can have your DH drop a hint to your ILs. Or maybe some of your friends would do it. I prob wouldn't throw one for myself though, but to each their own.

Re: would you throw yourself a shower ...rop?

I'm Jewish and I had a shower when I was pg with DS. My mother and MIL had no part in it, except for attending. In order to not aggravate my mom too much I told her I would have it closer to my DD than some I had been to. DH and I paid for the shower which we had at our home, my sisters helped with games and hosting. It was so much fun and I'm glad we did it!

Maybe you could just mention to your MIL that you are planning on throwing one and see what she says. If she doesn't say anything then there is nothing wrong with throwing one for yourself.

Re: would you throw yourself a shower ...rop?

maybe you could mention this to DH and ask him if he thinks someone will be planning something?

Re: would you throw yourself a shower ...rop?

My mil and her friend did my shower. MIL is Jewish, her friend converted when she got married. They told me as soon as I got pregnant that they were doing it.

I would have your DH casually ask if anything is being done. If not, there is nothing wrong with you throwing yourself one.

Re: would you throw yourself a shower ...rop?

this happened with a friend of mine. She is Jewish and her family was not going to throw her a baby shower however she wanted one so another friend and I planned and threw the shower for her, we just made sure that she wanted one and that her mother and sister were ok with it. Maybe a close friend(s) can help plan something? maybe with the help of your DH? If not then I don't see anything wrong with you throwing one for yourself.

Message edited 10/3/2011 4:21:22 PM.

Re: would you throw yourself a shower ...rop?

If I were you I would talk it over with your DH.

A friend of mine her family is against it but her DH wanted to have one so he threw it for her.

My sister is also throwing her own shower. Its kind of a different situation but we are due 7 weeks apart so we have each having 2 showers. One for our family since they are all out of state and won't travel 2x then sis is havign a shower for the fathers side of the family and I am havign one give by my MIL and my DH. For my sis her ILs don thave moeny so she is throwing it herself.

I would see if your DH will be Ok with a shower and work from there...maybe have him plan it with a friend.

Re: would you throw yourself a shower ...rop?

If I were you, I would talk to DH about it. Tell him honestly how you feel. If anything, maybe he can plan one for you. Or even with the help of his mother or friends.

Re: would you throw yourself a shower ...rop?

I agree w/the other ladies, discuss it w/DH and see what he says. If you really want one, I would explain that to him.

When I was pregnant, DH & I decided I would throw my own shower. I dont have a mother and my MIL is great but tends to make everything about her. My bridal shower came very close to be her shower. Anyway, I would see what he has to say & go from there.

Good Luck!

Re: would you throw yourself a shower ...rop?

I'm not not Jewish but I didn't have a shower with my first and won't be having one with this one either. It's just not something *we* do. I just had a registry and that was it.
But I don't see anything wrong with throwing yourself a baby shower