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b2b777
LIF Adult
Member since 9/09 4474 total posts
Name:
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Ethical question... WWYD?
Sorry if I am  ....
I have a friend who is having a huge dilemma. He just signed a sales agreement to buy a home in a really nice upscale area, (house of his dreams). He has been looking for over 6 months and was so happy to be done searching.
today he calls me and says his wife just did a search for registered sex offenders and found that there is one down the block...maybe 10 houses away.
His wife wants to walk away from the agreement... he is unsure. My first reaction was to walk way.... but then after thinking about it I wasnt 100% sure.
What do you think? Did the person pay their debt to society, or will you never be able to get it out of your head that this person is living on your block?
I also think it could hurt resale.
Now i know why he was getting such a great "deal" on the house.
WWYD????
please do not quote this post....thanks
Message edited 1/25/2011 10:33:42 PM.
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Posted 1/25/11 10:13 PM  |
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DiamondGirl
You are my I love you
Member since 7/09 18802 total posts
Name:
DiamondMama
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Re: Ethical question... WWYD?
I would not.
A sex offender could move in at anytime. A killer could live on your block and you could just not know bc they were never caught.
I am being extreme I know but I honestly do not think I could back out. 10 houses away is not next door.
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| Posted 1/25/11 10:33 PM |
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LSP2005
Bunny kisses are so cute!
Member since 5/05 19461 total posts
Name:
L
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Re: Ethical question... WWYD?
I would back out. 10 houses is to close for comfort for me. Yes, someone could theoretically move in at any time but why would I come to a danger? I don't believe that they can ever be cured or rehabilitated.
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| Posted 1/25/11 11:02 PM |
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JandJ1224
Member since 6/06 5911 total posts
Name:
Jannette
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Re: Ethical question... WWYD?
Could be a renter who won't be there in a year from now. If it was my dream house I would buy still
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| Posted 1/25/11 11:40 PM |
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rojerono
Happiest.
Member since 8/06 13803 total posts
Name:
Jeannie
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Re: Ethical question... WWYD?
I don't know.. I guess it depends on how great the deal was and how close to being a dream home the house was.. and what level offender it was?
I mean.. if it's a 21 year old kid who got convicted because he had consensual sex with his minor girlfriend I find it different than a pedophile.
A lot of really nice areas are dotted with sex offenders. If it was a place CRAWLING with them I might reconsider.
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| Posted 1/25/11 11:48 PM |
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GoldenRod
10 years on LIF!
Member since 11/06 26792 total posts
Name:
Shawn
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Re: Ethical question... WWYD?
I'm much less afraid of the known offenders than the "innocent" person next door....
There are registered offenders pretty much everywhere you look. I would still get the house.
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| Posted 1/26/11 7:42 AM |
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missfabulous
#mommyneedswine
Member since 6/09 10031 total posts
Name:
Colleen
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Re: Ethical question... WWYD?
I wouldn't back out.
Like a PP said: a sex offender can move to your block any time. They could move next door. My aunt and uncle (who have 3 children) live on the same block as a sex offender. The sex offender moved there AFTER them- nothing they can do. They've been getting along fine.
Unfortuantly, everywhere you go there are creeps, weirdos, and even worse, criminals. I think its better that at least you're aware they are there.
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| Posted 1/26/11 8:40 AM |
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Jenny614
LIF Adult
Member since 1/11 1065 total posts
Name:
Jen
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Re: Ethical question... WWYD?
Our NEXT DOOR neighbor is a sex offender and we knew this before we purchased the house. He is like a 45 year old man living with his wife. We were a little leery at first but then heard the story of what happened. He slept with a 17 year old, i dont know how long ago, but apparently she also slept with one of her teachers a week later. Not that It makes it righ by all means, it just makes him seem less of a monster and more of an idiot. We heard this from the town sheriff...I live in a small town.
So maybe try to find out the story behind it?
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| Posted 1/26/11 9:13 AM |
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caps612
In love with my little guys!!
Member since 8/10 5108 total posts
Name:
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Re: Ethical question... WWYD?
I wouldn't back out:
1 - like other posters said.. one could move in at anytime.
2 - do you really every know who your neighbors are? who anyone is? They could have done anything and are just not on a list cause they didn't get caught. The guy across the street could have molested his niece, but only her and him know... ya know?
3 - knowing the info.. you just keep your eyes open!
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| Posted 1/26/11 9:27 AM |
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acm1899
LIF Adult
Member since 1/11 1085 total posts
Name:
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Re: Ethical question... WWYD?
Posted by rojerono
I don't know.. I guess it depends on how great the deal was and how close to being a dream home the house was.. and what level offender it was?
I mean.. if it's a 21 year old kid who got convicted because he had consensual sex with his minor girlfriend I find it different than a pedophile.
A lot of really nice areas are dotted with sex offenders. If it was a place CRAWLING with them I might reconsider.
I agree. First of all, there are all different kinds of offenders. And one offender is not going to drive down the price of homes in a neighborhood, especially if it's an already affluent neighborhood.
No neighborhood is without its problems. Some are just able to hide things better behind their pretty front yards and facades.
I wouldn't back out because of that one thing, but that's just me. If it's an issue that your friend won't be able to get past, well then I think he knows what the answer is.
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| Posted 1/26/11 9:32 AM |
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jmf423
:)
Member since 5/05 6372 total posts
Name:
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Re: Ethical question... WWYD?
I would have o think about it, but I probably wouldn't back out.
You can buy your dream home and a sex offender could move in down the road.
Or this one could move out a month after you move in.
And like others said, you could have someone much worse living in your neighborhood that you don't know about. At least this person is registered and you know about it.
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| Posted 1/26/11 9:36 AM |
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computergirl
LIF Adult
Member since 5/05 3118 total posts
Name:
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Re: Ethical question... WWYD?
Posted by jmf423
I would have o think about it, but I probably wouldn't back out.
You can buy your dream home and a sex offender could move in down the road.
Or this one could move out a month after you move in.
And like others said, you could have someone much worse living in your neighborhood that you don't know about. At least this person is registered and you know about it.
I agree with all this. I'd go ahead with the purchase (and I have small kids)
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| Posted 1/26/11 9:55 AM |
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mom2b
LIF Adult
Member since 5/09 1072 total posts
Name:
x
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Re: Ethical question... WWYD?
I wouldn't back out. For all I know my next door neighbor is a sex offender and not registered as one. I don't think you ever really KNOW your neighbors. If it were my dream house I would still buy it. You have to teach your kids to stay away from strangers no matter where you go so I wouldn't back out.
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| Posted 1/26/11 9:57 AM |
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jilliibabii
Mrs. O'Connor
Member since 6/10 12821 total posts
Name:
Jillian
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Re: Ethical question... WWYD?
Posted by DiamondGirl
I would not.
A sex offender could move in at anytime. A killer could live on your block and you could just not know bc they were never caught.
I am being extreme I know but I honestly do not think I could back out. 10 houses away is not next door.
ITA. Granted, I wouldn't be asking him over for dinner, but at least they are both aware of it.
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| Posted 1/26/11 10:42 AM |
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mycrayon
LIF Infant
Member since 6/07 166 total posts
Name:
Carolyn
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Re: Ethical question... WWYD?
I wouldn't back out. Like a lot of posts say they are at least known which means they are being monitored and its better than not being known or worse not caught. They might also not be there much longer.
If its the house of thier dreams I would not back out
HTH
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| Posted 1/26/11 10:44 AM |
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RubyWoo
Complete.
Member since 1/11 1357 total posts
Name:
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Re: Ethical question... WWYD?
If it's truly a "dream house", I wouldn't back out. However, since it's all public information, I would find out as much information as I could about this person, simply for peace of mind. And if he's still not sure, I think I would try to speak to some of the neighbors, just to maybe get a read on this person.
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| Posted 1/26/11 11:17 AM |
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maybesoon
LIF Adult
Member since 9/09 5981 total posts
Name:
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Re: Ethical question... WWYD?
Posted by rojerono
I don't know.. I guess it depends on how great the deal was and how close to being a dream home the house was.. and what level offender it was?
I mean.. if it's a 21 year old kid who got convicted because he had consensual sex with his minor girlfriend I find it different than a pedophile.
A lot of really nice areas are dotted with sex offenders. If it was a place CRAWLING with them I might reconsider.
ita
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| Posted 1/26/11 11:56 AM |
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b2b777
LIF Adult
Member since 9/09 4474 total posts
Name:
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Re: Ethical question... WWYD?
Posted by RubyWoo
If it's truly a "dream house", I wouldn't back out. However, since it's all public information, I would find out as much information as I could about this person, simply for peace of mind. And if he's still not sure, I think I would try to speak to some of the neighbors, just to maybe get a read on this person.
this is a great idea. i will suggest it.
i think his wife is worried about living there, and he is OK with it, and more worried about resale if one day they had to move. what a world.
thanks ladies
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| Posted 1/26/11 12:57 PM |
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bicosi
life is a carousel
Member since 7/07 14956 total posts
Name:
M
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Re: Ethical question... WWYD?
Posted by GoldenRod
I'm much less afraid of the known offenders than the "innocent" person next door....
There are registered offenders pretty much everywhere you look. I would still get the house.
Ditto.. You could also have him look further into knowing the specifics of what the offense was ...
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| Posted 1/26/11 1:23 PM |
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acm1899
LIF Adult
Member since 1/11 1085 total posts
Name:
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Re: Ethical question... WWYD?
Posted by b2b777
this is a great idea. i will suggest it.
i think his wife is worried about living there, and he is OK with it, and more worried about resale if one day they had to move. what a world.
thanks ladies
By the way, it may not be as easy as just backing out. He signed a sales agreement which is essentially a contract. Some sales agreements have contingency clauses, so that is something he will have to look at too. If he truly wants to back out, it may wind up costing him some money.
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| Posted 1/26/11 1:32 PM |
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FirstMate
My lil cowboy
Member since 10/10 7790 total posts
Name:
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Re: Ethical question... WWYD?
I would not back out. Sex offenders are everywhere and so are downright awful people who haven't gotten caught yet. I would buy my dream house and live happily ever after.
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| Posted 1/26/11 7:41 PM |
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bikramaddict
mommy-to-be
Member since 8/06 4376 total posts
Name:
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Re: Ethical question... WWYD?
Posted by DiamondGirl
I would not.
A sex offender could move in at anytime. A killer could live on your block and you could just not know bc they were never caught.
I am being extreme I know but I honestly do not think I could back out. 10 houses away is not next door.
ITA. And to boot, you don't know the history behind this - this 's e x offender' may not actually be deserving of that title. For example, an old friend of mine is married to an offender. The guy was in the wrong place at the wrong time - he slept with a minor (though he was just over the legal age) and the girl's mom filed a complaint. instead of going to court, they settled and this is the burden he has to bear.
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| Posted 1/26/11 9:44 PM |
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MrsH2009
Thank you St. Gerard!
Member since 8/09 6631 total posts
Name:
M
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Re: Ethical question... WWYD?
Posted by LSP2005
I would back out. 10 houses is to close for comfort for me. Yes, someone could theoretically move in at any time but why would I come to a danger? I don't believe that they can ever be cured or rehabilitated.
ITA, I'm shocked people would choose the house. I check our registry all the time and we don't have kids yet, if we did, I would be even more vigilant. Yes there are unique situations, but most sex offenders are repeat offenders.
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| Posted 1/26/11 10:23 PM |
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MrsKS
Thank You St. Gerard.....
Member since 12/09 8306 total posts
Name:
Kerri
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Re: Ethical question... WWYD?
it would bother me. to be honest.
i wouldn't want to live that close to someone with this type of record. you can see on the sex offender registry what they have done...
IF it's the case of the guy is slightly older than the girl who is just underage... I could let that slide.
but this post prompted me to check the registry again (haven't checked in a long time) and there are people who sodomized and raped girls who are 11 and 13 years old. If that's the case NO... not comfortable at all.
And honestly, if I was house shopping... this would definitely sway my purchasing opinion.
Your neighbors definitely can bring the value of your home down or up... and in this case... it would affect my decision to purchase the home.
now of course one can just move in... if this were the case, i would make sure that my entire family was on high alert of the situation and knew to steer clear.
ETA: it actually disgusts me that these people who raped and sodomized children are out on the street...most are listed as just getting 5 to 6 years probation!!! and those with far less and minor crimes (not of a sexual or violent nature) are locked up for years and years...
this guy has actual sexual contact with an 8 year old girl.... 5 years probation 
another one has a 10 year old boy and a 9 year old girl actual sex: 6 years probation!!! one guy has actualy more than once sexual contact and intercourse with a 13 yr old boy: 6 years probation.
this is NOT probation after serving time... this is their actual sentence... there are ones listed with 2 to 4 years state prison (and for that it seems you need to actually stab your victim).... which still isn't long enough.
and the worst yet is this dbag who has actual sexual contact, sexual intercourse, deviate sexual intercourse with a 2 year old!!!: 3 to 9 years state prison!!! I think he deserves life!! he shouldn't see the light of day. this is so disturbing.
obviously the level of the crime they are listed for would have a great impact on my decision... some of these guys i'm finding... NO WAY would I want as a neighbor.
Message edited 1/27/2011 1:40:26 AM.
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| Posted 1/27/11 1:17 AM |
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MrsKS
Thank You St. Gerard.....
Member since 12/09 8306 total posts
Name:
Kerri
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Re: Ethical question... WWYD?
Posted by MrsH2009
Posted by LSP2005
I would back out. 10 houses is to close for comfort for me. Yes, someone could theoretically move in at any time but why would I come to a danger? I don't believe that they can ever be cured or rehabilitated.
ITA, I'm shocked people would choose the house. I check our registry all the time and we don't have kids yet, if we did, I would be even more vigilant. Yes there are unique situations, but most sex offenders are repeat offenders.
I could not agree more with either of you. this would greatly impact my decision.
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| Posted 1/27/11 1:42 AM |
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