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Whamtastic
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Member since 1/07 997 total posts
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Big Fat Baby with a Blackberry
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Re: Do you think the neighbor is wrong?
Posted by SweetestOfPeas
I am really surprised that so many agree w/the parents.
I agree that a 21 yr old is an adult and that the parents shouldn't be "held hostage" to her demands. but allowing her to sleep in a car in front of their house is just wrong! and obviously she doesn't have the $$ for an apt.
The OP seems to be under the impression that the girl can move back in at any time - just without her boyfriend. She doesn't want to do that. What can they do about that? When I was 21 there's no way my parents would have let me have a boyfriend move in. They would have told me that if I wanted to have an adult relationship and live with my BF that I could get my own place.
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Posted 9/20/07 3:52 PM  |
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MichelleR
my Becks
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tracyg
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Re: Do you think the neighbor is wrong?
Posted by SweetestOfPeas
I am really surprised that so many agree w/the parents.
I agree that a 21 yr old is an adult and that the parents shouldn't be "held hostage" to her demands. but allowing her to sleep in a car in front of their house is just wrong! and obviously she doesn't have the $$ for an apt.
what do you think the parents should do then?
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| Posted 9/20/07 3:55 PM |
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shiv
Twinsanity!!
Member since 5/07 4747 total posts
Name:
Shiv
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Re: Do you think the neighbor is wrong?
Posted by nycchic24
Actually I think kicking her out was ok. Parents shouldn't be held hostage to the whims of a 21 year old that wants her boyfriend to move in.
EXACTLY!!!!!!!!!!
And if they are keeping the door open to her and just laying down the law that they dont want her boyfriend in the house, they have EVERY RIGHT IN THE WORLD to do so! Shes not 14..shes 21! Big difference!!!
Also.. yes SOME parents are to blame for their childrens' behavior but I know of A LOT of situations where the parents bust their a sses to raise their children and in the end, they wind up choosing the wrong road and making the parents lives miserable. Happened in my own family, so I know first hand. I dont personally know these people obviously but I think its unfair to assume that they "abandoned" their daughter or contributed to her "badness" (not a word I know) when she just may be a 21 year old who wants what she wants when she wants it?
ITA- not the parents fault, she's a 21 year old acting out. If I were the parents I also would never let her live in the house with her boyfriend- if she wants to be on her own and can't afford a place to live- let her live in a car rather than adhere to her parents rules and have the luxury of living in a house. I'm against handing things to anyone, especially if they're acting out! She needs to learn to respect her parents.
BUT obv the parents have to deal with it because the daughter is upsetting/bothering the neighbors with her antics. I guess they need to tell her to leave. LOL- i can't believe they were living in a tent! Do they not have any friends they can crash out. It seems like they are purposely trying to embarass the parents.
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| Posted 9/20/07 3:56 PM |
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nrthshgrl
It goes fast. Pay attention.
Member since 7/05 57538 total posts
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Re: Do you think the neighbor is wrong?
Posted by MichelleR
Posted by SweetestOfPeas
I am really surprised that so many agree w/the parents.
I agree that a 21 yr old is an adult and that the parents shouldn't be "held hostage" to her demands. but allowing her to sleep in a car in front of their house is just wrong! and obviously she doesn't have the $$ for an apt.
what do you think the parents should do then?
I'm taking a harder line. It would kill me if I had to do this to my own daughter &  it never happens. But damn if I'm going to let my daughter live in a car & use my shower & food.
They should shut that down & see where she goes from there. Also if I were the parents, I wouldn't be pizzed at the neighbor at all.
Winter is coming. Let's hope for these parents it comes soon.
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| Posted 9/20/07 3:58 PM |
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nrthshgrl
It goes fast. Pay attention.
Member since 7/05 57538 total posts
Name:
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Re: Do you think the neighbor is wrong?
Posted by shiv
. It seems like they are purposely trying to embarass the parents.
ITA
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| Posted 9/20/07 3:58 PM |
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QuoteTheRaven424
22 Months?!!!!
Member since 5/05 13659 total posts
Name:
And If That Isn't A True Blue Miracle
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Re: Do you think the neighbor is wrong?
I agree wholeheartedly with the parents and to answer the question
the neighbor is right
until your life is stable - my house, my rules
you don't like it? Get out.
She's 21 - she chose to live like trash. She chose not to respect her parents wishes. So, this is her deal.
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| Posted 9/20/07 3:59 PM |
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eroxgirl
My Loves
Member since 5/05 15697 total posts
Name:
Rebecca
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Re: Do you think the neighbor is wrong?
She's 21, not 12. She should get a job and an apartment, and she should suffer her parents rules until she's got both. What kind of boyfriend does she have, anyway????
And the kid is trying to manipulate her parents with this tent nonsense. WHY should the parents let the boyfriend move in? It seems to me that this kid is used to getting what she wants out of her parents no matter what which is why she'd resort to such extremes. Good for the parents for kicking her out - but she needs to face the full consequences. Let the town deal with it. If you're going to live in someone's house, you have to follow the rules, and if you don't like it then you get your own place. If you can't afford it then you need to suck it up.
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| Posted 9/20/07 4:02 PM |
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QuoteTheRaven424
22 Months?!!!!
Member since 5/05 13659 total posts
Name:
And If That Isn't A True Blue Miracle
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Re: Do you think the neighbor is wrong?
in fact, if the neighbors were complaining, I'D probably encourage them to call the cops myself
Too much of this babying crap going on with these kids today
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| Posted 9/20/07 4:03 PM |
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SweetestOfPeas
J'taime Paris!
Member since 3/06 32345 total posts
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Re: Do you think the neighbor is wrong?
Posted by MichelleR
Posted by SweetestOfPeas
I am really surprised that so many agree w/the parents.
I agree that a 21 yr old is an adult and that the parents shouldn't be "held hostage" to her demands. but allowing her to sleep in a car in front of their house is just wrong! and obviously she doesn't have the $$ for an apt.
what do you think the parents should do then?
I really don't know. but I can tell you that my parents would have never allowed me to sleep in a car - anywhere. maybe for 1 night b/c they know how stubborn I am, but not longer than that.
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| Posted 9/20/07 4:10 PM |
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4monkeys
boys will be boys =)
Member since 9/05 7205 total posts
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:)
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Re: Do you think the neighbor is wrong?
Posted by eroxgirl
She's 21, not 12. She should get a job and an apartment, and she should suffer her parents rules until she's got both. What kind of boyfriend does she have, anyway????
And the kid is trying to manipulate her parents with this tent nonsense. WHY should the parents let the boyfriend move in? It seems to me that this kid is used to getting what she wants out of her parents no matter what which is why she'd resort to such extremes. Good for the parents for kicking her out - but she needs to face the full consequences. Let the town deal with it. If you're going to live in someone's house, you have to follow the rules, and if you don't like it then you get your own place. If you can't afford it then you need to suck it up.
ITA with every word !! 
This girl needs a good smack or two!
I would thank the neighbors for calling the town. this girl needs to know who's in control, and it's NOT her. (or her boyfriend)
and how can they afford a car anywaY?
 
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| Posted 9/20/07 4:11 PM |
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pinkandblue
Our family is complete, maybe
Member since 9/05 32436 total posts
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Stephanie
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Re: Do you think the neighbor is wrong?
Posted by Mssissy
Posted by stephanief
Posted by nycchic24
Parents like what?
Prents that would KICK their daughter out of the house with no where to go...that is awful and they should be ashamed of themselves....I can never understand a parent doing that...period
They didn' KICK her out. At 21 yrs old she can leave and she did without a place to go.
Also, her parents have told her she is always welcome in their home. They keep their door open for her so she can eat and shower. But she refuses to move back in unless her boyfriend is allowed to move back in also.
gotcha.... 
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| Posted 9/20/07 4:13 PM |
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pinkandblue
Our family is complete, maybe
Member since 9/05 32436 total posts
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Stephanie
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Re: Do you think the neighbor is wrong?
Posted by MichelleR
Posted by Whamtastic
Posted by stephanief
Posted by nycchic24
Parents like what?
Prents that would KICK their daughter out of the house with no where to go...that is awful and they should be ashamed of themselves....I can never understand a parent doing that...period
They didn't kick her out, they said her boyfriend couldn't move in. She had a choice - live with her parents in their house, or live with her boyfriend. She made a decision and at 21 she has the right to make that decision. But as an adult who choses to move out of their parents' house to live with her boyfriend, she should take responsibility and find a home.
I have to agree with that.
My uncle is going through something similar with my cousin, and she SHOULD be kicked out of the house!
I guess that is where the difference lies, I would NEVER, under ANY circumstances kick my child out. That is JMHO 
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| Posted 9/20/07 4:15 PM |
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MrsMerlot
Unconditional Love
Member since 4/06 6005 total posts
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Chrissy
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Re: Do you think the neighbor is wrong?
Posted by Whamtastic
Posted by SweetestOfPeas
  omg! what kind of scum of the earth parents would let their own flesh and blood live like that?!
sorry to be judgmental, but that is disgusting! 
She's 21 years old. They're not FORCING her to live that way, she should get a job and rent an apartment like the rest of us.
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| Posted 9/20/07 4:16 PM |
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JandJ1224
Member since 6/06 5911 total posts
Name:
Jannette
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Re: Do you think the neighbor is wrong?
I think that this 21 year old woman is having a temper tantrum. Her parents did not turn their back on her or kick her out, they said she can't have the boyfriend living in the house. The girl needs to grow up and move back inside or get an apartment with the boyfriend. I think the best course of action would be to not let her inside anymore until she decides what she is doing.
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| Posted 9/20/07 4:17 PM |
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4monkeys
boys will be boys =)
Member since 9/05 7205 total posts
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:)
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Re: Do you think the neighbor is wrong?
Posted by stephanief
I guess that is where the difference lies, I would NEVER, under ANY circumstances kick my child out. That is JMHO
I think ALL parents would say that, who wants to see their child on the street ???
and they did not kick her out. the "child" here is the one that's acting in an unacceptable manner, not the parents.
Ive seen teens (and adults) that treat their parents like garbage, dirt, disrespect is an understatement. where does it stop?
If anything, Id put her in one of those "scared straight" camps.
Message edited 9/20/2007 4:20:00 PM.
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| Posted 9/20/07 4:19 PM |
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QuoteTheRaven424
22 Months?!!!!
Member since 5/05 13659 total posts
Name:
And If That Isn't A True Blue Miracle
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Re: Do you think the neighbor is wrong?
they gave her the choice - she chooses to live in a car
nobody kicked her out
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| Posted 9/20/07 4:20 PM |
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MichelleR
my Becks
Member since 5/05 1772 total posts
Name:
tracyg
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Re: Do you think the neighbor is wrong?
Posted by SweetestOfPeas
Posted by MichelleR
Posted by SweetestOfPeas
I am really surprised that so many agree w/the parents.
I agree that a 21 yr old is an adult and that the parents shouldn't be "held hostage" to her demands. but allowing her to sleep in a car in front of their house is just wrong! and obviously she doesn't have the $$ for an apt.
what do you think the parents should do then?
I really don't know. but I can tell you that my parents would have never allowed me to sleep in a car - anywhere. maybe for 1 night b/c they know how stubborn I am, but not longer than that.
But she's welcome in their home, just not with the boyfriend. So I don't see what else the parents can do.
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| Posted 9/20/07 4:21 PM |
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dpli
Daylight savings :)
Member since 5/05 13973 total posts
Name:
D
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Re: Do you think the neighbor is wrong?
Posted by Mssissy
Posted by SweetestOfPeas
omg! what kind of scum of the earth parents would let their own flesh and blood live like that?!
sorry to be judgmental, but that is disgusting!
and to answer your Q, I agree with the neighbor!
I agree with the neighbor also.
She is 21 yrs old and does not want to live by her parents rules. So she choose to leave. Her parents have invited her to come back home without the boyfriend. She refuses.
I actually told this person, if this was my daughter I would tell her "if you choose to live like trash fine, that's your decision, but don't do it in front of my house or our block".
I agree with you 100% and I would even consider calling the Town as the parent. I don't know why people are blaming the parents. This girl is 21 years old and they are telling her that she does have somewhere to go, just that the boyfriend can't live in their house. She needs to grow up and be responsible.
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| Posted 9/20/07 4:21 PM |
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QuoteTheRaven424
22 Months?!!!!
Member since 5/05 13659 total posts
Name:
And If That Isn't A True Blue Miracle
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Re: Do you think the neighbor is wrong?
plus
she chooses to live in a car
but they let her eat and shower there?
Like hell
You choose to leave?
You're on your own - try to make it and learn some responsibility
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| Posted 9/20/07 4:24 PM |
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SweetestOfPeas
J'taime Paris!
Member since 3/06 32345 total posts
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Re: Do you think the neighbor is wrong?
Posted by MichelleR
Posted by SweetestOfPeas
Posted by MichelleR
Posted by SweetestOfPeas
I am really surprised that so many agree w/the parents.
I agree that a 21 yr old is an adult and that the parents shouldn't be "held hostage" to her demands. but allowing her to sleep in a car in front of their house is just wrong! and obviously she doesn't have the $$ for an apt.
what do you think the parents should do then?
I really don't know. but I can tell you that my parents would have never allowed me to sleep in a car - anywhere. maybe for 1 night b/c they know how stubborn I am, but not longer than that.
But she's welcome in their home, just not with the boyfriend. So I don't see what else the parents can do.
I don't have the answer, just giving my opinion, kinda like everyone else on here
the parents are seriously messed up, and so is their daughter. the apple doesn't fall too far
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| Posted 9/20/07 4:24 PM |
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NS1976
My princess!
Member since 5/05 6548 total posts
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Re: Do you think the neighbor is wrong?
I honestly still dont see how the PARENTS are messed up??? Because they told her the boyfriend couldnt move in?? I dont get it at all.
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| Posted 9/20/07 4:27 PM |
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4monkeys
boys will be boys =)
Member since 9/05 7205 total posts
Name:
:)
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Re: Do you think the neighbor is wrong?
Posted by nycchic24
I honestly still dont see how the PARENTS are messed up??? Because they told her the boyfriend couldnt move in?? I dont get it at all.
me neither!
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| Posted 9/20/07 4:28 PM |
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SweetestOfPeas
J'taime Paris!
Member since 3/06 32345 total posts
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Re: Do you think the neighbor is wrong?
Posted by nycchic24
I honestly still dont see how the PARENTS are messed up??? Because they told her the boyfriend couldnt move in?? I dont get it at all.
you have a right to your opinion as do I, we can agree to disagree.
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| Posted 9/20/07 4:28 PM |
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Goobster
:)
Member since 5/07 27557 total posts
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:)
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Re: Do you think the neighbor is wrong?
Posted by NewlyMrs
I agree with the neighbor! Whatever the parents approve of for their daughter moving in with the boyfriend is their business, but the neighborhood should not be involved in this issue.
If they are mature enough to live together...then live together in a home...a car, a porch, or a tent are not homes!!!
ITA
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| Posted 9/20/07 4:29 PM |
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pinkandblue
Our family is complete, maybe
Member since 9/05 32436 total posts
Name:
Stephanie
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Re: Do you think the neighbor is wrong?
Posted by anna
Posted by stephanief
I guess that is where the difference lies, I would NEVER, under ANY circumstances kick my child out. That is JMHO
I think ALL parents would say that, who wants to see their child on the street ???
and they did not kick her out. the "child" here is the one that's acting in an unacceptable manner, not the parents.
Ive seen teens (and adults) that treat their parents like garbage, dirt, disrespect is an understatement. where does it stop?
If anything, Id put her in one of those "scared straight" camps.
I see your point....I guess I did not understand that the parents said she can come back without the Boyfriend....
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| Posted 9/20/07 4:35 PM |
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