On bed rest again... can't stop crying.

I kind of knew by the pressure I felt "down below" that my cervix was going to be shorter today. And it was. Down to 2.7 again from 3.4.

I think I was emotional to begin with, but when they told me that I wouldn't even be able to go to my brother's house for Father's Day, even though I would be able to just lie down there, I just lost it and still can't stop crying. When I said, "really??" in disbelief, the sono tech said, "Unless you want to have a premature baby.". It kind of hit me between the eyes. Of course, I would do anything for my baby... I just figured what's the difference between laying down at home and laying down at my brother's house? But, I'm homebound.

I also was already feeling down because when I was at the Baptism prep class last night, there were two other pregnant women there who seemed absolutely fine. One was due in less than 2 weeks! Of course everyone has their own stories and I wish the best for everyone. It just put in perspective how kind of "failure like" I feel (even though I know it's silly to feel like that) that I am having such problems with my pregnancy with 2 months to go. And I feel like I'm letting my DH down, too, that he has to pick up all my slack - which he's doing so well. But it just makes me feel useless. His sister and my brother are even coming by tomorrow to clean for me. It's necessary since we're having family over next week, but I feel so uncomfortable having them do that for me.

Then I feel like I ruined this for myself because while I was on "modified" bed rest this week (work and home only), I cheated a bit and did more. I still did MUCH less than I normally do, but I probably pushed the envelope a bit.

So, now I'm home for at least a week... again. I just pray they let me go to my shower next Saturday!

If you reached this part, thanks for reading.

Re: On bed rest again... can't stop crying.

Rest, you haven't failed, this is beyond your control. Just rest and do what your baby needs.

Re: On bed rest again... can't stop crying.

Dont be so hard on yourself. Your healthy baby will be here soon enough and you will forget that you were even pregnant

Re: On bed rest again... can't stop crying.

You kjnow, it's so crazy how different the doctors are. When mine was measuring 2.5, they put me on modified bedrest. My OB and high risk both gave me permission to go anywhere I wanted so long as I could be reclined. I was allowed to go for my 3 hour GTT, prenatal massage, etc. Now that I'm on strict bedrest, I'm not allowed to do all of that but the high risk gave me permission to go to my mom's for Father's Day so long as I laid down the whole time.

My cervix is now only 1.7 so maybe my docs were too lenient but I don't think so. I think it's just my body. But I seriously don't understand why you can't go to your brother's house if you can lay down. Is it a far trip?

I can totally identify with how much this stinks. I completely understand everything you are saying but I don't feel like a failure and you shouldn't either. I am doing everything the doctors are telling me to do and am doing the right thing by this kid all the time. I'm doing the best I can and I'm sure you are too. I'm confident that both of us will go on to be full term or close enough and we will have happy, healthy, chubby babies.

I was teasing my OB the other day and said "watch. After all this I"ll be at week 42 and we'll be discussing induction". And she said "believe me, it happens." Hang in there! Watch Mob Wives if you think you have problems....

Re: On bed rest again... can't stop crying.

Don't beat yourself up about it. You just have to take care of yourself and relax. I'm so sorry you're going through this, but just think you're helping you LO to cook longer.

Re: On bed rest again... can't stop crying.

Re: On bed rest again... can't stop crying.

I actually cried reading you post.....i totally know how u feel about feeling like failing n extra pressure on dh. I actually went into the start of a bad depression last week dh had to leave work i cried all day n night . Being on bed rest def takes a toll on ur mind n body, but just remember every extra day our baby stays in us is a day they stay out of nicu.
My cervix was 0.4 like two weeks ago...now it's prob totally gone but they don't wanna do internals right now .
Its def rough but just think next yr u n ur baby wil be at fathers day...try n stay positive easier said then done.
Just remember there are a lot of us on here stuck inside u can always post or fm if u ever wanna talk.

Re: On bed rest again... can't stop crying.

SO sorry to hear that you are going through this!

but like others said, you are doing the best thing for your baby. You are very lucky to have family willing to help you out this weekend and next weekend will be even better when more family comes to see you, in bed or not!
stay positive and stay rested! I hope everything works out for your shower next week

Re: On bed rest again... can't stop crying.

just try to remember that although it sucks, it did get your cervix in better shape... keep thinking of your shower as motivation!

Re: On bed rest again... can't stop crying.

So sorry you're goind through this

Re: On bed rest again... can't stop crying.

Thank you ALL so much! You really do make me feel better!

Miabella... you're right... it really does almost turn into a mini depression. I definitely feel it. I felt like crying non-stop yesterday, and the sono today was just the straw. I'm sorry you're going through this, too. It $ucks, doesn't it? When are you due? It's such a helpless situation. People tell me to "enjoy" relaxing now because I won't be able to once the baby comes. This isn't really relaxing! I just look around and see what I could be doing!

FirstMate - that's what I thought, too! My brother lives 20 minutes from me. What's the big deal if I just lay down there? But I can't. DH was mad at me for trying to justify going to just a family get together when our baby's well being is at stake. And how can I argue with that?? I just wish they would have given me the go-ahead for Sunday. The funny thing is... I think my DOCTOR would have allowed it, but he wasn't there. He was on the phone and my question about Sunday wasn't relayed over the phone, so the sono tech, who's the main person there, told me no way. It is so weird how different protocols are...

Thanks for all the comments! May we all have healthy pregnancies and chubby babies!

Re: On bed rest again... can't stop crying.

I dont like the way to sono tech said that to you, how rude! Sorry you are back on bedrest, Hope you can come off it soon

Re: On bed rest again... can't stop crying.

You should absolutely not feel bad! Keep in mind this is out of your control. I can relate to the feeling useless part because I need to be doing something all the time, but your most important job right now is taking care of you and your baby! Hang in there!

Re: On bed rest again... can't stop crying.

Re: On bed rest again... can't stop crying.

I cant even imagine how hard this must be.

Re: On bed rest again... can't stop crying.

Hope the rest you get over the next week will allow you to go to your shower. Stay positive!

Re: On bed rest again... can't stop crying.

I know family and friends mean well n really what else can they say, but i think that was one of the reasons I put up a wall n stopped talking to everyone. You can only hear " enjoy the rest while u can once the baby comes u will wish u r in bed all day" " I'm jealous i wld love to be laying in bed all day" n so on. It's one thing to lounge in bed its another to be told u have to stay in bed.
My due date is july 27 th ..although I will be 35 weeks tuesday n they r taking me off the procardia...so I am still contracting n my cervix basically totally shortened so im thinking she is gonna come in the next few weeks to come....being in bed i am soooooo not prepared n have nothing set up ..very stressful.
Im sure fam will set some stuff up if i shod go early..but yes bed rest sucks u know its for a good cause but it feels like a punishment at times. I haven't enjoyed my preg...I feel weak n fat ..dh is great though ....I think our husbands become our biggest cheer leaders during preg.

I also agree with pp about how sono lady spoke to u ...they r the same in my office no bed side manors i think they forget all the emotions running through us. I cried in my dr office one of the drs i was seeing told me to stop crying the baby feels our emotions an i chose to get preg so now i have to just go through the motions n do what ever i have to at this point ....need less to say i cried ten times more when she left.

Re: On bed rest again... can't stop crying.

i delivered at 33w and i missed my shower. believe me i know EXACTLY how you feel about feeling like a failure. my only advice is to be happy that you have an opportunity to rest and keep your baby inside and growing. by the time i was put in the hospital (for me it was pre-e and HELLP), i only had 4 days before i was so sick I had no choice but to deliver. as long as you are healthy enough to stay pregnant and grow your baby - please please please do what you can to stay pregnant so baby can cook some more. in the end whatever you have to do - cleaning, your shower.. none of it matters as much as taking care of your baby and yourself. everything else can wait and everyone else will understand. i promise!!

Re: On bed rest again... can't stop crying.

don't be too hard on yourself!! you and your baby need the rest! be strong!

Re: On bed rest again... can't stop crying.

My dr admitted me to the hospital at 29 weeks and kept me for a full week.. I got out 2 days before my shower and I was so depressed. I hated when people told me to rest and enjoy b/c when the babies come I couldn't. ANYONE who is STUCK in bed or in the hospital can't relax!

I know how you feel and I'm so sorry, I'm thankful they didn't admit you to the hospital and I hope that by being on bedrest your cervix will get better again.

Re: On bed rest again... can't stop crying.

I am so sorry you have to go through this. But try to push out the negativity with some positivity. Fathers Day will be here again next year before you know it, and you will have your little bundle of joy in your arms! Good Luck w/ the bed rest, I know how much it stinks.

Re: On bed rest again... can't stop crying.

Re: On bed rest again... can't stop crying.

Hugs, bedrest suckss asss I was on full bedrest from week 31-36 with Emmy and it was in December No tree shopping, no decorating, no cookies, no shopping...Nothing, Nadda, Zip. My poor husband, mother, and brother did it all for me as I sat and watched from the couch. I did Christmas shopping on amazon.com and sent him w/detailed lists for the rest. TRUST ME I get how bad this feels. I was a wreck and was on here ALL THE FREAKING TIME! These ladies are great and we're all here no matter what! I agree every doc is differnt, though, but I think it's the fact you felt pressure is why you're back on bedrest. I was 1.5cm when placed on full bedrest and 1.7 on limited/modified bedrest, but I had no pressure just ocassional contractions. Everybody is different and every body/baby is different. I know it's hard to see the end right now, trust me, but tehre IS an end. I missed both my childbirth and bfing classes. I remember at my 35wk appointment bawling about how I can't have a baby since I never took a class, and I don't know what to do. I was in and out of the hospital from 33wks on for dehydration, gallstomes, and pret-term labor on procardia and a host of other meds. Take it easy and try not to worry. It sounds like everybody understands the situation, and to your brother he needs to seriously ask himself how he would feel if you went into labor because you went to his house. Is that something he would be willing to live with? WOuld you?

I know that's a lot, but I am 100% living proff the bedrest WORKS! I was off bedrest at 36wks and my 1st day off I got dressed, did my hair, showered, and went to the store. My water broke. I was 36w1d and it was Christmas Eve......bedrest is NO JOKE and there is a reason they put you on it!

Re: On bed rest again... can't stop crying.

Hang in there!!!! It is all worth it in the end! I was on modified bedrest starting at 13 weeks and on and off full bedrest my whole pregnancy. It is so hard and so hard to let others do things for you but please listen to your doctor. It will all be a distant memory soon. I missed my shower at work and went to my regular shower laying in a lounge chair the whole time. Just rest up and try to stay relaxed, the stress of crying isn't good for you either! Many hugs and wishes for a nice long cervix!

Re: On bed rest again... can't stop crying.

Just remember its all for the baby. You are NOT a failure!! You are an awesome woman with a beautiful baby inside!!