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DRMom
Two in Blue
Member since 5/05 20223 total posts
Name:
Melissa
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Re: who would you have a baby for?
Posted by stephanief
my sister, that is it 
Thanks baby! Unfortunately we have actually had this conversation since I have had some issues. My best friend also volunteered for me. My SIL probably would but is VERY sentimental and not sure she could do that and hand the baby over...
That said I would do it for any of the above....Though I'm sure no one wants my oven as it has proven to be pretty defective--I'm hopefully on the way to fixing it now.
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Posted 8/8/07 12:37 PM  |
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Long Island Weddings
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lulugrrl
My 3 Blessings
Member since 3/06 6551 total posts
Name:
L
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Re: who would you have a baby for?
You know..I am 8 months preggo now. I am really not sure I could ever do this. Although if one of my brothers wives had a serious problem, I might feel inclined to moreso. I have no sisters. But the bond i feel to this baby inside me, I feel emotionally I could not handle it. I do not think I would want someone to carry a child for me either. This would have nothing to do with God or his plans...I would however adopt, it's something I hope to do during my life anyway.
Those that are able to be surrogates, are ANGELS I htink...who is to say that is not God's plan??
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| Posted 8/8/07 12:40 PM |
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sunflowerjesss
Mommy to 3!
Member since 10/05 20369 total posts
Name:
Jesss, duh.
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Re: who would you have a baby for?
My sister or my bestest friend in the entire world. That's it.
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| Posted 8/8/07 12:40 PM |
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DRMom
Two in Blue
Member since 5/05 20223 total posts
Name:
Melissa
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Re: who would you have a baby for?
Posted by donegal419
i don't think i could do it for anyone. i don't think i could have this life growing inside of me for 9 months and then turn around and give it away.
I am also pretty conservative when it comes to all that stuff.... i guess i feel that you don't mess around with God and nature. I understand why people do surrogates and IVF and other things to make a baby.... but I am not sure i would do it if I had to. I feel like if I couldn't conceive or someone else coulldn't conceive, then maybe there would be other ways around it... like adoption, for one. i would do that before trying to take over God's plan. i don't think I would be comfortable being only an "oven". How do you tell a kid, "Well, you're part of Daddy's sperm and maybe Mommy's egg, but you grew in Aunt Karen for 9 months..."
No, I don't think I would do it.....
I'm sorry but I have to respond. I love the way people can think what they would do when they have NEVER been in the situations. Trust me if you ever have trouble having a baby(which I wouldn't wish on anyone) you may change your mind. Do you know what adoption entails? The $$ you need, the background checks and social workers, the time involved?
I'll be honest here: I have had 3 pregnancy losses and one ectopic in which I lost 1 fallopian tube. I am finally getting some answers as to why this is happening to me and you know what?
IT'S NOT GOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!It is my immune system which is hyperactive--this means that I am probably at little risk for cancer but my body needs some help in recognizing a fetus as good material rather than foreign.
I swear I think the word God should be x'ed out on this website, just like he!! is. Everyone seems to know what he (or she) thinks
Message edited 8/8/2007 12:44:05 PM.
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| Posted 8/8/07 12:43 PM |
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LisaW
Time for me to FLY!
Member since 5/05 13199 total posts
Name:
Did I ever tell you that I hate people?
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Re: who would you have a baby for?
Posted by melijane
Posted by donegal419
i don't think i could do it for anyone. i don't think i could have this life growing inside of me for 9 months and then turn around and give it away.
I am also pretty conservative when it comes to all that stuff.... i guess i feel that you don't mess around with God and nature. I understand why people do surrogates and IVF and other things to make a baby.... but I am not sure i would do it if I had to. I feel like if I couldn't conceive or someone else coulldn't conceive, then maybe there would be other ways around it... like adoption, for one. i would do that before trying to take over God's plan. i don't think I would be comfortable being only an "oven". How do you tell a kid, "Well, you're part of Daddy's sperm and maybe Mommy's egg, but you grew in Aunt Karen for 9 months..."
No, I don't think I would do it.....
I'm sorry but I have to respond. I love the way people can think what they would do when they have NEVER been in the situations. Trust me if you ever have trouble having a baby(which I wouldn't wish on anyone) you may change your mind. Do you know what adoption entails? The $$ you need, the background checks and social workers, the time involved?
I'll be honest here: I have had 3 pregnancy losses and one ectopic in which I lost 1 fallopian tube. I am finally getting some answers as to why this is happening to me and you know what?
IT'S NOT GOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!It is my immune system which is hyperactive--this means that I am probably at little risk for cancer but my body needs some help in recognizing a fetus as good material rather than foreign.
I swear I think the word God should be x'ed out on this website, just like he!! is. Everyone seems to know what he (or she) thinks
Thank you Melissa 
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| Posted 8/8/07 12:45 PM |
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Gumpslilqtpie
Living the DREAM!!!
Member since 7/06 2646 total posts
Name:
Kimmer
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Re: who would you have a baby for?
my family members
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| Posted 8/8/07 12:46 PM |
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eroxgirl
My Loves
Member since 5/05 15697 total posts
Name:
Rebecca
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Re: who would you have a baby for?
I have one very close friend who has a condition that prohibits her from being able to carry a baby to term. If she was able to donate her eggs, I'd carry a baby for her. I couldn't donate my own eggs though.
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| Posted 8/8/07 12:48 PM |
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DRMom
Two in Blue
Member since 5/05 20223 total posts
Name:
Melissa
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Re: who would you have a baby for?
Posted by LisaW
Posted by melijane
Posted by donegal419
i don't think i could do it for anyone. i don't think i could have this life growing inside of me for 9 months and then turn around and give it away.
I am also pretty conservative when it comes to all that stuff.... i guess i feel that you don't mess around with God and nature. I understand why people do surrogates and IVF and other things to make a baby.... but I am not sure i would do it if I had to. I feel like if I couldn't conceive or someone else coulldn't conceive, then maybe there would be other ways around it... like adoption, for one. i would do that before trying to take over God's plan. i don't think I would be comfortable being only an "oven". How do you tell a kid, "Well, you're part of Daddy's sperm and maybe Mommy's egg, but you grew in Aunt Karen for 9 months..."
No, I don't think I would do it.....
I'm sorry but I have to respond. I love the way people can think what they would do when they have NEVER been in the situations. Trust me if you ever have trouble having a baby(which I wouldn't wish on anyone) you may change your mind. Do you know what adoption entails? The $$ you need, the background checks and social workers, the time involved?
I'll be honest here: I have had 3 pregnancy losses and one ectopic in which I lost 1 fallopian tube. I am finally getting some answers as to why this is happening to me and you know what?
IT'S NOT GOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!It is my immune system which is hyperactive--this means that I am probably at little risk for cancer but my body needs some help in recognizing a fetus as good material rather than foreign.
I swear I think the word God should be x'ed out on this website, just like he!! is. Everyone seems to know what he (or she) thinks
Thank you Melissa
 I'm so sick of hearing what God's plan is...How the he!l do YOU know(not "you" but anyone who says this-and it seems to be said a lot here)
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| Posted 8/8/07 12:50 PM |
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Rycois
Blessed with 2blue/2pink
Member since 12/05 13341 total posts
Name:
J
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Re: who would you have a baby for?
Posted by donegal419
i don't think i could do it for anyone. i don't think i could have this life growing inside of me for 9 months and then turn around and give it away.
I am also pretty conservative when it comes to all that stuff.... i guess i feel that you don't mess around with God and nature. I understand why people do surrogates and IVF and other things to make a baby.... but I am not sure i would do it if I had to. I feel like if I couldn't conceive or someone else coulldn't conceive, then maybe there would be other ways around it... like adoption, for one. i would do that before trying to take over God's plan. i don't think I would be comfortable being only an "oven". How do you tell a kid, "Well, you're part of Daddy's sperm and maybe Mommy's egg, but you grew in Aunt Karen for 9 months..."
No, I don't think I would do it.....
I do not believe it is EVER God's plan for someone to miscarry or have IF issues. Therefore, I do not believe it is against "god's plan" when we use science or medicine to overcome IF hurdles.
Offering to carry a child for someone else is the most selfless act I can think of. Now how in the world could that be considered against god's plan? To me, it's what he intended humankind to do for one another.
Message edited 8/8/2007 12:57:03 PM.
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| Posted 8/8/07 12:54 PM |
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MST9106
My life:)
Member since 6/06 9589 total posts
Name:
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Re: who would you have a baby for?
As someone who is carrying now, I would definitely carry it for someone close to me...as long as all the "materials" were provided I would gladly bake and roast that baby in my oven.
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| Posted 8/8/07 12:56 PM |
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lulugrrl
My 3 Blessings
Member since 3/06 6551 total posts
Name:
L
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Re: who would you have a baby for?
I do not believe it is EVER God's plan for someone to miscarry or have IF issues. Therefore, I do not believe it is against "god's plan" when we use science or medicine to overcome IF hurdles.
Offering to carry a child for someone else is the most selfless act I can think of. Now how in the world could that be considered against god's plan? To me, it's what he intended humankind to do for one another.
EXACTLY, what i was wanting to say..thanks for saying so well.
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| Posted 8/8/07 12:58 PM |
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CunningOne
***
Member since 5/05 26975 total posts
Name:
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Re: who would you have a baby for?
My sisters, for sure. I had my children in my 30's, so I doubt I'd ever consider myself a candidate for my DD or even DIL.
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| Posted 8/8/07 1:01 PM |
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nrthshgrl
It goes fast. Pay attention.
Member since 7/05 57538 total posts
Name:
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Re: who would you have a baby for?
I doubt I'm a candidate to carry for anyone since I"m older.
I've offered 2 close friends & 1 close relative who dealt/are dealing with IF issues.
Totally agree with you Melijane on the G-d angle. It is biology, pure & simple.
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| Posted 8/8/07 1:10 PM |
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QuoteTheRaven424
22 Months?!!!!
Member since 5/05 13659 total posts
Name:
And If That Isn't A True Blue Miracle
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Re: who would you have a baby for?
I need to respond to the people who are talking about God's plan and all that stuff.
First, let me preface by saying that some people are religious, some aren't. Some feel God has a role in this - some don't. Doesn't make any of us right or wrong. It's just how we see things.
For us, we are both religious and believe that God does have a plan for us. For us, we believe that everything that happens in our lives is because of His will. We don't always understand the reason why bad stuff happens, and we're not supposed to.
The miscarriages s*cked, but we looked at it and said, "Well, we always wondered if we could even get pregnant." "So, God answered our prayers and showed us that we could; however, it was not in his will to give us a child at that time."
As for using science and all that stuff, the church debates on the use of it to conceive. We've always said that despite the church, we would always so what we needed to do, no matter what. To us, if scientific intervention works, we'll consider it a gift from God, for giving the doctors the talent to make it happen. And if not, then to us, that's God's way of saying, "I know you'll make good parents, but my world is over-crowded." "Do me a favor and take one in that otherwise may not have a shot."
To us, I have to believe that God wants us to be parents. If not, I don't think he would have teased us with a pregnancy and then taking it away.
As for the question at hand, if IF was not an issue and someone close was in need, then we would certainly do what we could.
Again - this is how WE see things. I know alot of people won't see it exactly that way, and like I said, that doesn't make anyone right or wrong.
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| Posted 8/8/07 1:25 PM |
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mtnmama
Member since 5/06 4794 total posts
Name:
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Message edited 7/13/2009 2:44:01 PM.
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| Posted 8/8/07 1:44 PM |
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shiv
Twinsanity!!
Member since 5/07 4747 total posts
Name:
Shiv
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Re: who would you have a baby for?
Posted by QuoteTheRaven424
I need to respond to the people who are talking about God's plan and all that stuff.
First, let me preface by saying that some people are religious, some aren't. Some feel God has a role in this - some don't. Doesn't make any of us right or wrong. It's just how we see things.
For us, we are both religious and believe that God does have a plan for us. For us, we believe that everything that happens in our lives is because of His will. We don't always understand the reason why bad stuff happens, and we're not supposed to.
The miscarriages s*cked, but we looked at it and said, "Well, we always wondered if we could even get pregnant." "So, God answered our prayers and showed us that we could; however, it was not in his will to give us a child at that time."
As for using science and all that stuff, the church debates on the use of it to conceive. We've always said that despite the church, we would always so what we needed to do, no matter what. To us, if scientific intervention works, we'll consider it a gift from God, for giving the doctors the talent to make it happen. And if not, then to us, that's God's way of saying, "I know you'll make good parents, but my world is over-crowded." "Do me a favor and take one in that otherwise may not have a shot."
To us, I have to believe that God wants us to be parents. If not, I don't think he would have teased us with a pregnancy and then taking it away.
As for the question at hand, if IF was not an issue and someone close was in need, then we would certainly do what we could.
Again - this is how WE see things. I know alot of people won't see it exactly that way, and like I said, that doesn't make anyone right or wrong.
i agree, my mother had 3 misscarriages, and if she didn't have them- i or some of my sisters would not be here. Whether you believe in god or not, things happen for a reason.
And i agree that surrogate and scientific help are def gifts from god. good points in all!
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| Posted 8/8/07 1:48 PM |
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DRMom
Two in Blue
Member since 5/05 20223 total posts
Name:
Melissa
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Re: who would you have a baby for?
Posted by cpanyc
Posted by melijane
Posted by donegal419
i don't think i could do it for anyone. i don't think i could have this life growing inside of me for 9 months and then turn around and give it away.
I am also pretty conservative when it comes to all that stuff.... i guess i feel that you don't mess around with God and nature. I understand why people do surrogates and IVF and other things to make a baby.... but I am not sure i would do it if I had to. I feel like if I couldn't conceive or someone else coulldn't conceive, then maybe there would be other ways around it... like adoption, for one. i would do that before trying to take over God's plan. i don't think I would be comfortable being only an "oven". How do you tell a kid, "Well, you're part of Daddy's sperm and maybe Mommy's egg, but you grew in Aunt Karen for 9 months..."
No, I don't think I would do it.....
I'm sorry but I have to respond. I love the way people can think what they would do when they have NEVER been in the situations. Trust me if you ever have trouble having a baby(which I wouldn't wish on anyone) you may change your mind. Do you know what adoption entails? The $$ you need, the background checks and social workers, the time involved?
I'll be honest here: I have had 3 pregnancy losses and one ectopic in which I lost 1 fallopian tube. I am finally getting some answers as to why this is happening to me and you know what?
IT'S NOT GOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!It is my immune system which is hyperactive--this means that I am probably at little risk for cancer but my body needs some help in recognizing a fetus as good material rather than foreign.
I swear I think the word God should be x'ed out on this website, just like he!! is. Everyone seems to know what he (or she) thinks
Why are you attacking her opinion? So because you don't believe it has anything to do with God, it doesn't? She is not attacking people who think they would do it, she is just saying why she thinks she wouldn't. Everyone is different, we don't all have to believe the same thing.
And my sister and SIL both live with IF issues. My SIL has adopted and is on the list for another. I have spent 5 years listening to and supporting them both, I am aware of how difficult it is but still would not carry another person's child.
Quite simply, because in my opinion her point of view needs to be attacked. I am not saying there is no God, or if there is he doesn't have a plan. The way her post was written sounds like she is speaking about something of which she has no knowledge.
When you have suffered multiple losses and a possible loss of something you deeply desire like having a child and you hear someone say, It is God's plan, You can always adopt or any number of other inane, insensitive comments it would make your blood boil. Anyone else who has an issue with what I said well BRING IT because this is something I feel VERY strongly about(if you couldn't tell )
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| Posted 8/8/07 1:51 PM |
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CaMacho
Sisters :)
Member since 7/06 15112 total posts
Name:
Jess
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Re: who would you have a baby for?
My sister.
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| Posted 8/8/07 1:53 PM |
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QuoteTheRaven424
22 Months?!!!!
Member since 5/05 13659 total posts
Name:
And If That Isn't A True Blue Miracle
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Re: who would you have a baby for?
like i said, we all look at it differently and it doesn't make anyone right or wrong
Adoption and surrogacy are very personal decisions
Message edited 8/8/2007 2:01:06 PM.
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| Posted 8/8/07 1:57 PM |
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DRMom
Two in Blue
Member since 5/05 20223 total posts
Name:
Melissa
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Re: who would you have a baby for?
Posted by QuoteTheRaven424
like i said, we all look at it differently and it doesn't make anyone right or wrong
Adoption and surrogacy are very personal decisions
You are very right
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| Posted 8/8/07 2:05 PM |
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JennZ
MY LIFE!!
Member since 8/05 25463 total posts
Name:
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Re: who would you have a baby for?
Posted by melijane
Posted by donegal419
i don't think i could do it for anyone. i don't think i could have this life growing inside of me for 9 months and then turn around and give it away.
I am also pretty conservative when it comes to all that stuff.... i guess i feel that you don't mess around with God and nature. I understand why people do surrogates and IVF and other things to make a baby.... but I am not sure i would do it if I had to. I feel like if I couldn't conceive or someone else coulldn't conceive, then maybe there would be other ways around it... like adoption, for one. i would do that before trying to take over God's plan. i don't think I would be comfortable being only an "oven". How do you tell a kid, "Well, you're part of Daddy's sperm and maybe Mommy's egg, but you grew in Aunt Karen for 9 months..."
No, I don't think I would do it.....
I'm sorry but I have to respond. I love the way people can think what they would do when they have NEVER been in the situations. Trust me if you ever have trouble having a baby(which I wouldn't wish on anyone) you may change your mind. Do you know what adoption entails? The $$ you need, the background checks and social workers, the time involved?
I'll be honest here: I have had 3 pregnancy losses and one ectopic in which I lost 1 fallopian tube. I am finally getting some answers as to why this is happening to me and you know what?
IT'S NOT GOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!It is my immune system which is hyperactive--this means that I am probably at little risk for cancer but my body needs some help in recognizing a fetus as good material rather than foreign.
I swear I think the word God should be x'ed out on this website, just like he!! is. Everyone seems to know what he (or she) thinks
BRAVO.
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| Posted 8/8/07 2:07 PM |
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Lanabean
Yoginis
Member since 11/05 9202 total posts
Name:
Lana
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Re: who would you have a baby for?
My sister. She has spinabifida and does have a period of course and can technically, but physically it might be very hard on her body. I'd have a baby for her in a minute if she wanted one and could not.
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| Posted 8/8/07 2:19 PM |
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NASP09
...
Member since 6/05 6030 total posts
Name:
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Re:
Message edited 3/3/2010 6:28:29 PM.
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| Posted 8/8/07 3:26 PM |
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GenLCSW
Baby # 3 is here!!!
Member since 7/05 21138 total posts
Name:
Genna
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Re: who would you have a baby for?
I would be a surrogate for my sister and my best friend
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| Posted 8/8/07 3:56 PM |
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JenniferEver
The Disney Lady
Member since 5/05 18163 total posts
Name:
Jennifer
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Re: who would you have a baby for?
I don't think I can even begin to think about this when not faced with it. At this moment, I can't really imagine doing it for anyone, but I've never been faced with that situation. If a story really touched me or someone really needed it, I might be compelled to give that gift.
I'm also of the mind that rather than going through IVF I would most likely rather adopt. No, I have not been in the position before, but I think I could say what I would prefer. As an adoptee, I can say that sometimes it is just not in God's plan for someone to have children, whatever the biological reason turns out to be, and that sometimes it IS God's plan to adopt.
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| Posted 8/8/07 4:29 PM |
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