Re: what do you think you would do- with poll

I understand and respect everyones posts, but I have to make one comment... not every handicap person suffers. Yes, some handicaps or diseases are cruel and unfair, but many handicaps & diseases are treatable and people live full and HAPPY lives. Just something to consider too when discussing this. Everyone (not this board, just people in general all over the world) always jump to the worst case scenerio of living when in truth technology and therapy have made leaps and bounds into the quality of lives of the mentally and physically handicapped.

Re: what do you think you would do- with poll

What a tough and very personal decision to have to make. My heart goes out to you and I wish you well with whatever choice you make. It's just too far personal a choice for me to even voice my opinion.

Re: what do you think you would do- with poll

Re: what do you think you would do- with poll

It would be a really hard decision but I would continue with the pregnancy & the reason being is because you never know ifyou would ever have the chance ot have another. I believe that things happen for a reason and if it was to happen to me I would continue with the pregnancy.

Re: what do you think you would do- with poll

Re: what do you think you would do- with poll

I would continue with the pregnancy, hands down, any other thought would not enter my mind. I would believe I was chosen for this child and we would do our best with whatever we were blessed with.

Re: what do you think you would do- with poll

Message edited 3/15/2006 2:47:52 PM.

Re: what do you think you would do- with poll

With the exception of something like Spina Bifida where the baby would be in agony for the few hours or days they lived after being born, we would not terminate. We know several people who have children with Downs Syndrome who are very happy, sweet children. Plus my step sister has severe mental and physical disabilities and she is one of the happiest people I know. She's in high school now and well aware that she's not like everyone else, but talks about going to college and finding a job that she can handle. Like we'll be at a restaurant and she'll look at the waitress and say "I could never do that job, it would take me so long to bring people their food they'd get mad at me." But she has a whole list of things she can do. I think a lof of it has to do with my dad and his wife never treating her differently, but just like the other kids.

Re: what do you think you would do- with poll

Re: what do you think you would do- with poll

We discussed it early on and thankfully are on the same page. We declined to even have the test because we felt that whatever God gives us is what we are meant to have. And, since i knew I wouldn't terminate the pregnancy I didn't see any point in having the test.

Re: what do you think you would do- with poll

Re: what do you think you would do- with poll

Without a doubt I would have the child. I would and do feel if given that , it is our fate and we would be stronger because of it and accept it. Life wasnt meant to be easy.

BUT I respect everyones decisions and I would never ever think twice about a parent who choose to abort.

Each person makes decisions that their life is capable of handling. I think in some situations unfortunatly not having the baby is the best situation..and I think you actually have to be STRONGER to not choose to carry the PG versus accepting it because you can be true to yourself and to life by saying, I cant do do, OR I feel my child would suffer.

Re: what do you think you would do- with poll

Re: what do you think you would do- with poll

Message edited 3/15/2006 11:00:04 PM.

Re: what do you think you would do- with poll

My opinion is that God blessed me with a child, regardless of whether or not it has a disability..I have a friend whose brother has Downs - he is 23 years old and has a wonderful thriving life.....I don't understand how anyone could say they would terminate. I just don't get it.

Re: what do you think you would do- with poll

Not being in the position, I can't really say. But I think a lot about being close to 35 already, and I wonder what would happen to a severely disabled child after DH and I were gone. I hate the thought of an adult child of ours living in an institution.

Re: what do you think you would do- with poll

My best friend gave birth to a beautiful baby boy last april who wasnt diagnosed with DS in the womb but did end up having it. At first she was devestated, what with all the surgeries (DS babies tend to have digestive and heart problems). He is now 11.5 mo and even though she goes to a variety of dr's weekly and has therapist in her home everyday she raises him just as she did her older son, no special treatment. They wont know for sometime how severe his DS is but she is ready to handle what comes at her.

I always felt that I wouldnt be able to carry a DS baby but watching my friend I can see its not the end of the world.

Re: what do you think you would do- with poll

Re: what do you think you would do- with poll

I would continue with the pregnancy and for that reason I chose to have no testing with my son Jack and will do the same for this one.

Re: what do you think you would do- with poll

Re: what do you think you would do- with poll

Re: what do you think you would do- with poll

Re: what do you think you would do- with poll

1st off- I wouldnt rely on an ultrascreen, or the AFP tests....If something didnt look right- Id go for the amnio...

I dont think Id terminate because of downs.... but maybe something more severe...

I cant really say one way or other....I choose not to do any of those tests... because I felt what was meant to be would be....

Again- amnio is the only test thats is pretty much 100%, and that is the only way I would even consider doing anything about it...

Re: what do you think you would do- with poll

If my tests came back highly likely for downs, I would have an amnio. If that came back positive, I would consider terminating. I don't know if I could do it though. I know that my DH would favor terminating. It makes me sick to my stomach just thinking about it.

Re: what do you think you would do- with poll

DH's sister had an amnio done when she was pg - and they told her that she was most definitely having a child with DS. She gave birth to a beautiful baby girl - who is now a "norma" 14 year old, top of her class, takes karate and dance, plays the tuba, loves dogs and kids, and has no DS whatsoever --- nothing. So, I personally would not take the chance of terminating a potentially healthy baby - plus there are other problems that can come up you won't even know about until after the baby is born. So for me, no. DH is of a different mind however.

I guess if I ever get lucky enough to get PG I will just be so happy - I don't think I would even do the amnio to be honest.