Wednesday QOTD...

When your child(ren) turn 18 what type of parent do you plan to be? The type who pays for college, buys a car, helps pay bills, allows them to stay home for as long as they want, etc. How does your answer compare to what you experienced when you turned 18?

Re: Wednesday QOTD...

I always worked and made money on my own. When I was 16 and got my drivers license, I bought my own car and paid my insurance. Then when it was time for college, my mom paid tuition but I would pay my own living expenses. My mom has always been generous and helped my sister and I out, but I always worked and helped support myself. I want to be the same way with my kids....be there to help them out and pay for college but other than that I don't want them to be dependent on me after they are 18. I want them to learn to work hard and make their own money.

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My parents were the type who provided everything I needed. They paid for college and grad school, have bought me three cars, and would have let me stay home forever. I remember having friends who had to do everything on their own once they turned 18. Although I didnt envy them then, I now see that they did mature sooner and have a more realistic view of the real world earlier on. I dont think I will ever expect my kids to move out, they can stay forever too, but i think I will want my kids to have some more responsibility for sure. I wil probably want to support my kids for as long as they need me, and as long as I can. I say this now, but who klnows if my views will change.

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When I turned 18 I was in college, so my parents paid for college and I worked on the side as tutor in college for some extra cash. No car, since I lived on campus. After school, I came back home to work and did my grad school etc.

When our LO ( ) turn 18, we would like to pay for college.. I feel like that is best thing we could possibly do for our child.. pay for their education, if we can or help them out as much as possible. Everything else is material and it will come and go.

They are more than welcome to stay at home while in college or grad school or even while working and getting situated. And if the plan is to bum around, I will kick their ARSE out.. no sentiments will hold me back their.

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I was very babied, so I don't want to do that with my kid. I will pay for college, but would really like them out on their own in their early 20's.

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DH & I had the discussion a few weeks ago and we agreed that the LO's should start working when they are 16 for pocket $ and anything that they save for a car by the time they are 18, we will double it (in all actuality, I will put the $ in a savings account to give to them at a later date).

I am going to do everything in my power to encourage my kids to go away to school. DH never did this, I did and at 34 he still regrets not doing it. We plan on doing our best to pay for as much of their college as possible. Our only request will be that they work when they are home for vacations & holidays.

Grad school I am up in the air about. I am currently in grad school myself and think that if my kids do chose that route, they can swing it themselves but I think we would make that decision based on where their lives are at in that particular moment in time.

I would NEVER kick my kid out of my house BUT, I refuse to make it easy for him/her to stay. There will be rent, living expenses, etc. I personally feel it is more damaging to keep a child home in its 20s than to set it free to make its own way. I moved out, made poor financial decisions my father let me move back sort myself out and then he expected me to get back out there, which I did.

One thing I did that I am going to also encourage my kids to experience is spending a semester abroad somewhere. I went to London for a semester. I wish I could of gone for a full year!!! I learned and grew so much in those short few months and developed a love for travel. I would love to provide my children w/the same opportunity.

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I fear the teenage years, when they can really decide their own future and you can't do much about it. I fear that they won't be happy, that they might get in with the "wrong crowd" or get kicked out of school.
I want a baby, I want a toddler, I want a preschooler and a child that goes to elementary school....after that, the military can have them

Re: Wednesday QOTD...

Posted by MrsFishstick

I want a baby, I want a toddler, I want a preschooler and a child that goes to elementary school....after that, the military can have them

Re: Wednesday QOTD...

Well, as long as my plan to win the lottery happens by then....

In all seriousness, my parents didn't have a ton of money when I was growing up. I know now that things were tighter than they ever let me know....but, we had a nice house in a great town/school district, and i wasn't ever wanting for anything really. Maybe I didn't have designer clothes, or a fancy new car, but I did have clothes, and food and toys and a car to drive (my mom's used 88 honda accord)...and I learned about the value of money, about indulgences and needs....

When I went to college, I was fortunate enough to get a full scholarship, so my parents only had to worry about room and board. Which they paid for. I didn't have to get a job during college, because they wanted me to focus on my studies. But I did have a job for the summer when I came home (I also worked during my junior/senior year summers of hs). DH on the other hand, never went to college - he had to raise money just to play football in HS....

I hope that when the time comes, we are able to help out our kids to give them a car (a USED/hand-me-down car), to help them with college, etc. BUt...I expect them to have a job during the summer junior/senior year of high school, I expect chores/help around the house to be done, etc. If they want a credit card when they turn 18 - that's on them, and they'd better have a job to pay for it.

As for living with us...while you're in college, fine....and even right after college if you need time to find a job...but there has to be a limit sometime....I don't know what that age/limit is, but I don't want to be my in-laws, who STILL have their 30 year old son living with them (and mooching off them)....

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I would do all of the above and more.
My parents spoiled me to no end and I'll probably do the same. I can still go to my parents for help if needed. When its comes to extravagant purchases I will expect a contribution...they'll learn the value of a dollar!

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Well, I would not buy a car for my kid, I would help them with a lease, because owning a car I think was more a damage for me. If they knew it was sort of "borrowed" i think things are less likely to happen very often (and im talking maintence wear and tear). I currently have a lease, and I said to myself after a while "why was i never introduced to this!?" I think it's great to lease cars!

i was on my parents insurance until i was 21, which saved money - i paid some but not all, i had a payment plan but my parents never really enforced it so I got away with it. I probalbly won't do that. DH was brought up having to pay for his own stuff except college.

I definitely plan to be a little more into my kid's financials. I know DH is going to want to be so I am going to have to strive and not be so leanent. lol.

Re: Wednesday QOTD...

Message edited 7/4/2011 12:28:04 AM.

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We are already saving for #1.

We plan on helping our children as much as we can. We received no help financially from our parents and have done everything on our own. It would
have been nice if DH did not have a studen loan that he is still paying, if we had help with our wedding or the downpayment on our house. I was so jealous of the kids who got a car for their birthday. I was always the kid whose parents couldn't even afford a birthday party!

I think if we can do one big thing for each of our children it would be nice. Whether its a wedding, downpayment, help with a college, a car etc. That is if my children are appreciative and responsible of course.

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In my family, education was a very high priority. My parents paid for college for both my sister and I. Anything after undergrad was paid for by us. I lived at home until I was 23, rent free but I paid my own bills. However, I didn't pay my own car insurance until last May when I was 27 years old and married for 8 months.

DH's family on the other hand didn't really place a lot of emphasis on education. No one in his family has gone to college.

For us, education will be important and we will do our best to pay for as much as we can for at least undergrad. However, there will be no free rides - s/he will have to pull their own weight and get an after school job and maintain good grades.

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My siblings and I were all raised to work for and earn everything that we got. We bought our own cars, paid our own cell phone blils, insurance, college tuition, etc. I think it taught me responsibility and true appreciation for things at an early age. I learned not to ever take anything for granted, and I want my children to learn the same. DH has mostly the same view, except he feels that every parent should pay for their child's college education because he feels it is a right that every child has. But with everything else, he agrees, so that is how we will raise our children. We'll see what happens as far as college when that time comes

Message edited 2/16/2011 11:55:25 PM.

Re: Wednesday QOTD...

I plan to follow in my parents footsteps with that, of course being that DH & I are financially able to. My parents contributed to college whatever it would cost to go to a state college. I went to SUNY SB and they paid for everything, my sister went away and she paid for the rest. I also gave my mom $$ every month, which I thought was to contribute to the household, in actuality she saved it for me and gave it to me as a wedding present for my own hard work. I had to paid for my own car insurance, cell phone and gas. I also had to cook dinner for my family once a week. I learned alot of responsibility from that and I think it was a good balance between being supported by my parents and starting to learn how to support myself.