Someone knock some sense into me before DH kills me!!!

I'm getting the preggo itch!! DS is only 20 months and i want to give him time to be the baby. plus we CANNOT afford 2 in daycare. our plan is to wait to get preggo when he turns 4 so he'll be in kindergarten. but i dont wanna!! i want to be rich, win the lotto, have a distance rich uncle that i never met die and leave me money (jk).

ive been lurking on pregnancy and i miss it!! i told DH im lurking and he just ignores me. i know he wants another one but hes frustrated about money too. and hes gonna be 37 in October. i know thats not that old...but i dont want him to be an old man when we have the next one.

ugh!!!! ok...vent over. wahhhhhh!!!!!!!

Re: Someone knock some sense into me before DH kills me!!!

I'm feeling ya but I know it's CRAZY so we are waiting until DS is at least 2 before trying. I can't do 2 under 2 but i still get that itch...especially since my friend has a 1mo old!

Go take a cold shower and wait a little while

Re: Someone knock some sense into me before DH kills me!!!

I knew you were feeling itchy!!!!!

Honestly, I *totally* know the fear of 2 in daycare It was one of the first 5 thoughts I had when I found out we're having twins, since that's what our situation would be.

We don't have a choice though ... I can't keep 1 twin inside for another 5 years ... or can I?!

We have no choice but to make it work somehow, so it looks like I'll be a PTSAHM and work in the evenings and weekends.

Do you have any options for adjusting either of your work schedules?

Would in-home care be cheaper for you guys?

Re: Someone knock some sense into me before DH kills me!!!

Im not gonna be much help lol...

Before you say you cant affiord 2 in daycare, are you SURE? lol... I mean sit down and crunch the numbers!! Also, some daycares give a discount for 2 in a daycare. (my mom does but her daycare is in bayside).

Also, think about it. You have all the stuff from DS #1. Infant car seat, swing, high chair, etc. So no big expense there.

THe only reason I say go for it is cause it seems like your DH (deep down) really wants a baby!!

Re: Someone knock some sense into me before DH kills me!!!

me too!!!
DH thinks i'm totally nuts but i'm hoping for twins the second time around! (it will never happen as neither of us has twins in the family)

I'm unemployed and once my unemployment ends we'll have to live on one income. i can't afford to get a job that pays little because i have debt we need to pay off and we'd need to pay a nanny and most jobs would not cover both.

and knowing all this financial stress, i'm still like let's start trying when DS is 18 months!

my logic: we get it out of the way and it's over and done with. i have all the baby stuff already so we won't have to buy much. we suffer for a few years and then once daycare kindergarten starts i can go back to work and we'll be ok.

my other factor: i'm going back to school in september and want the second baby before i have to go out an work in the new field.

i know i'm not much help. if anything, i'd be the one saying go for it!

Re: Someone knock some sense into me before DH kills me!!!

well, we decided to try for one more and got 2 for the price of 1 . If that doesn't scare you, I don't know what will

Re: Someone knock some sense into me before DH kills me!!!

STOP!!!

I feel ya, I REALLY REALLY want to but I KNOW I need to finish school first


BUT STOP!!!!!!!

Re: Someone knock some sense into me before DH kills me!!!

Haha, I'm itchy too and lurking on the PG board doesn't help!

The difference for me is that the money situation doesn't deter me. My mom was a single mom and made very little despite working very hard. She made it work. I have DH and I also work, so I figure we're ahead of her curve. We'd somehow make it work. For me, the desire to have another child outweighs the possible money stresses.

That's not to say I don't worry about it - I do. Especially since my mom is a twin so I know there's a real possibility of us having twins next time (scares me to death now that I already have one DS!). But I don't know, I just kinda have faith.

So, don't look to me to knock some sense into you If anything, I'll be the one telling you to scratch your itch

Re: Someone knock some sense into me before DH kills me!!!

lol well im bad cause i just figured out the names if i have a boy or a girl!

i dont know how my parents did it. they owned a house. barely made $20,000 and my mom stayed home for 5 years watching us. different times!!

i agree with get it out of the way. it would only be hard for 2 years while they're both in daycare. but i may be signing the divorce papers if i try

Re: Someone knock some sense into me before DH kills me!!!

I say Do it! Ok, I'm a bad influence.

Like PP said... DS's price will get cheaper as he gets older and they give discounts for siblings. So, you're a little tight for some time. We did the same thing. When we moved to NJ the house is much, much bigger, but it's more expensive. We also moved DS to a daycare half the price as the one on LI. DH didn't have any work in NJ so he was commuting a lot to LI and was slow at times too. The good outweighed the bad and we just went for it.

Really, are we ever financially ready?! You have a roof over your head, a job, a loving family close by and a good daycare you trust to watch the kids.

Re: Someone knock some sense into me before DH kills me!!!

Now I need all of you to email my DH and tell him.

Re: Someone knock some sense into me before DH kills me!!!

i hear ya..i think it will be a while before another baby comes along. I cant right now b/c i have no maternity coverage on my insurance (that i buy privately) and until DH's company has more affordable group plans or finds a new job, we cant afford the $1000 it would be to add me onto the plan.

my bro and i are 4 1/2 years apart. Im thinking if jack does have a sibling, it will be about the same age gap.

Re: Someone knock some sense into me before DH kills me!!!

I have the itch and my son will only be 4 months old.
I keep on telling myself "wait until you at least lose the weight!"

Re: Someone knock some sense into me before DH kills me!!!

Totally normal at that point Diana. However anytime you want a second borrow Andrew. Lol!!!!! Plus think of all the positives of Ian being older: 1 Ian is in school
2. Ian can help you with the baby in big boy ways
3. Ian will be fully potty trained (1 in diapers is alot less expensive then 2 in diapers)
4. Ian will be in a big boy bed (no taking away his crib for the baby)
5.Ian will be ALOT more independent by then, and will have chores, ie clearing the table after dinner, while you sit and feed the baby.

If you really want we'll buy you a baby Alive! lol!!!

Re: Someone knock some sense into me before DH kills me!!!

Posted by sunflowerjesss

well, we decided to try for one more and got 2 for the price of 1 . If that doesn't scare you, I don't know what will

Re: Someone knock some sense into me before DH kills me!!!

In the same boat, Diana. I had a serious baby itch for a bit, and it's so hard getting DH on board. You know what started to scare me a little? not just the idea of 2 in daycare...but...going through the first 4 months again!

Honestly though, I keep wondering if I could wait one more year to start trying just for financial reasons (and DH will be more on board then because it's ALWAYS about money ) but I'm going to be 37 this summer as it is....will another year really make that much of a difference? So if we wait another year, I'll be 38-going on 39 when I give birth.

I feel your frustration, I do!! I have already decided on a name for a boy (we fought and FOUGHT over a boy name before we knew Riley was a girl) and DH even agrees, so a song came on the other day about a boy with that name and I started to BAWL. A sign?

Message edited 6/24/2011 12:15:56 PM.

Re: Someone knock some sense into me before DH kills me!!!

I feel the exact same way Diana! I wish I had the money to be popping out babies, but I don't so I have to wait. We can live vicariously through our friends

PS I will say I love that R and C are almost 4 yrs apart. I feel like they both got/get to enjoy alone time with mommy kwim?

Message edited 6/24/2011 12:19:21 PM.

Re: Someone knock some sense into me before DH kills me!!!

Posted by TaraHutch

In the same boat, Diana. I had a serious baby itch for a bit, and it's so hard getting DH on board. You know what started to scare me a little? not just the idea of 2 in daycare...but...going through the first 4 months again!

Honestly though, I keep wondering if I could wait one more year to start trying just for financial reasons (and DH will be more on board then because it's ALWAYS about money ) but I'm going to be 37 this summer as it is....will another year really make that much of a difference? So if we wait another year, I'll be 38-going on 39 when I give birth.

I feel your frustration, I do!! I have already decided on a name for a boy (we fought and FOUGHT over a boy name before we knew Riley was a girl) and DH even agrees, so a song came on the other day about a boy with that name and I started to BAWL. A sign?

Re: Someone knock some sense into me before DH kills me!!!

Posted by MaMaTeenie

We can live vicariously through our friends

Re: Someone knock some sense into me before DH kills me!!!

Posted by IansMommy23

Posted by MaMaTeenie

We can live vicariously through our friends

one reason im getting the itch! lol but yeah...i definitely will!

Re: Someone knock some sense into me before DH kills me!!!

Posted by katiebug

Posted by IansMommy23

Posted by MaMaTeenie

We can live vicariously through our friends

one reason im getting the itch! lol but yeah...i definitely will!

I vote you both get pregnant

Re: Someone knock some sense into me before DH kills me!!!

Posted by IansMommy23

Posted by katiebug

Posted by IansMommy23

Posted by MaMaTeenie

We can live vicariously through our friends

one reason im getting the itch! lol but yeah...i definitely will!

I vote you both get pregnant

how bout you just let me borrow Evan for a bit?? I'm sure he'll tire me out!

Re: Someone knock some sense into me before DH kills me!!!

You're crazy? My 3rd is 3.5 months and I want another. I'd have to marry someone else for that to happen though!

Re: Someone knock some sense into me before DH kills me!!!

Posted by katiebug

Posted by IansMommy23

Posted by katiebug

Posted by IansMommy23

Posted by MaMaTeenie

We can live vicariously through our friends

one reason im getting the itch! lol but yeah...i definitely will!

I vote you both get pregnant

how bout you just let me borrow Evan for a bit?? I'm sure he'll tire me out!

Any day, anytime, any where Trust me, you will rethink the baby bug.

Re: Someone knock some sense into me before DH kills me!!!

I'm in the same boat here. I won't even go on the pregnancy board though because I know I'll get upset. We'll probably have to wait til DS turns 4 before I can TTC.