So mortifying....

So DH and I try to take one of the kids out with us shopping ever now and again to have some alone time with them (they are twins). So I asked DS to come food shopping with me because I took the other one a few weeks ago and they love to ride in the cart and he was such a good boy.

Whole nother story with this one. The minute we walked into the store he started screaming. I finally got him some mini muffins and let him hold the bag and that worked for about three aisles. Then when he was finished with that he started up again, but really started up again. Screaming at the top of his lungs. Twice i had to put my hand over his mouth to stop him. I was so embarrassed and fuming mad. I can't imagine what people thought.

Then people start staring and one guy even chuckled as I walked past (I think he was trying to make me feel better). I contemplated leaving but my cart was full so I headed straight to the check out line and sure enough he starts it again. EVERYONE was looking at me I wanted to cry. Then this nice lady who worked there tapped me on my shoulder and was like why don't you come down to aisle 7 and I will check you out. YUP they opened the check out line for me to get out of the store and not wait.

Ugh....I just wish people would not be so judgmental when it happens. Don't stare at me.....I am trying my best.

Message edited 7/20/2009 9:54:51 AM.

Re: So mortifying....

OMG you poor thing! of cours eyou are doing the best you can - he's only a baby

i love that they opened a checkout line for you! that was so nice of them.

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It happens to every parent as some point Some more often then others My ds throws a fit if he doesn't get his cheese from the deli counter. We are at the point that they recognize him when he starts crying

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It happened to us yesterday in Best Buy. DD threw herself on the floor and screamed like a lunatic.

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I always try to remember that MOST people (esp at the supermarket) have BTDT with regards to toddler tantrums. Anytime I see a mom going through it, I always make sure to let her know I've been there and can totally relate.

When we're going through it, I try my best to remain calm and make comments to anyone who's watching, "Like the show? She gets her flair for drama from her dad" (which, BTW- is a total lie- she is AAAAAAAALLLLLLL me ).

Don't let anyone make you feel bad. Being difficult is a normal part of toddlerhood.

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A crying child does not equate bad mothering - and any parent knows that first hand. Kudos to them for recognizing you were stressing out & trying to help you out. I know you're not finding it funny now, but later when he's an adult, you will be laughing over how they opened a checkout line for him.

My daughter is 6 and now I can chuckle that her screaming was probably the best way to encourage birth control among the clerks at Costco. I could have rented her to high schools instead of using those eggs to care for.

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I look at moms like you in the store and you know what I am thinking? "That POOR mom, thank God I left DS home."

You are not a bad mom, it happens. You have to get the food shopping done and you took him with you, big deal. I would much rather listen to a cranky toddler at the checkout than someone screaming on their cell phone.

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Coming from a non-mom... We don't mind an upset child when we see a great mom trying her darndest. (is darndest even a word?)

Re: So mortifying....

Posted by BJandDan

Coming from a non-mom... We don't mind an upset child when we see a great mom trying her darndest. (is darndest even a word?)

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Re: So mortifying....

I have definitley been in your shoes and my answer, now, is Peapod! I'm telling you its the best.
My DS definitley had his moments in the store. Screaming. Wanting to hold this and not that! Taking my keys, play, then throw them down the aisle.
I got the stares. Oh well, stare..Im doing the best I can!
I think quite a few moms have been in the same situation.
For us, the deli line was the worst! He'd be patient in the beginning and then slowly be like, "OK, why isn't the cart moving"..
I would even try to play games with him like "Where are the apples, bananas...etc"...Anything I can find in my general area!
Don't be mortified! It happens.

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It happens. I have learned not to get embarrassed when DS acts up. If I can take him outside I do, but if I'm stuck on the check out line I have no choice. You're never going to see those people again anyway

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More and more and I am letting DD scream it out.

As she gets older, she understands that if pitches a fit, mom will do everything under the sun to get her to stop.

We've decided that this is not a good lesson. So, in some places we are starting to let her cry and scream-with a few comments from us.

It's tough, but we've all been there. Glad they opened the register for you

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Aw, I've been there many times. My younger DD threw a tantrum to end all tantrums in public just the other day...luckily we were at Sesame Place where we're all parents of toddlers!

I tend to think most people aren't really judging us...we just feel like everyone's staring through us because yeah, it IS embarassing (except at Sesame Place ). I think most people have a lot of sympathy actually.

Here's to better days...

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I feel your pain! A few weeks ago when we were coming back from vacation, DD started screaming on the flight home. It was so embarrassing and people started to make comments.

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At least you got your own check-out lane!!!!

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I have been there MANY times with my son. MANY times. It is horrible, embarrassing, and extremely stressful.

However, whenever I see a child doing the same thing to his/her mom or dad, I don't even think twice about it. Kids will be kids, and it's just the way they are. I don't look at them, I don't acknowledge it. I HATE when people stare, or WORSE, offer advice. I want to just ring their necks at point because I am so upset.

This is a phase that I hope ends SOON!

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awwwwwwwwww that was SO nice of that lady to help get you out of there quickly! i'm sorry your DC gave you a hard time

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Aww..thank you all for making me feel so much better. I usually am very good at ignoring him, but when there are a million people around and he keeps screaming louder and louder because I am not paying attention to him it makes you have to pay attention to it.

I like the idea of sending 2-3 year olds to rent out to HS kids to avoid teen pregnancy.

I think its also because his brother is so not like that, so it just bothers me so much more that he does this all the time.

Thanks again

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We have ALL been there, done that.
Not fun on any day, no matter where you are..inside your home included.
It is just part of the journey.

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Posted by jellybean1420

It happens. I have learned not to get embarrassed when DS acts up. If I can take him outside I do, but if I'm stuck on the check out line I have no choice. You're never going to see those people again anyway

Re: So mortifying....

Posted by Mikismom

Posted by BJandDan

Coming from a non-mom... We don't mind an upset child when we see a great mom trying her darndest. (is darndest even a word?)

I wonder what non-moms think of my then, I ignore tantrums most of the time

That is the only way to deal with them, if I try to console or get dd to stop, they get worse....I have no choice but to let her scream

good thing it does not happen often

Message edited 7/20/2009 1:17:49 PM.

Re: So mortifying....

I haven't experienced this yet but I know my day will come...

But before I had DS when I witnessed something like this I was only judgmental if the parents didn't try to do something. What would make me nuts is watching a kid have an outburst and the parents just ignored the situation.

I'm glad that woman was kind enough to get you out of there quickly - she obviously saw how distaught you were.

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I'm sorry that happened to you - but I can't wait for it to happen to my S2BX - he swears his kid will NEVER do it.

Message edited 7/20/2009 1:29:16 PM.