edited...

Message edited 12/12/2008 9:47:59 AM.

Re: I've been awake all night. Please tell me how you would feel about this situation. (Pls don't quote I have to take this down in a few).

maybe he doesn't get along with people he works with and is too embarrassed to tell you?

Re: I've been awake all night. Please tell me how you would feel about this situation. (Pls don't quote I have to take this down in a few).

that is not it either. i know some of the guys b/c we give them rides home. He claims he has nothing in common w/ them.

Re: I've been awake all night. Please tell me how you would feel about this situation. (Pls don't quote I have to take this down in a few).

Re: I've been awake all night. Please tell me how you would feel about this situation. (Pls don't quote I have to take this down in a few).

I would just explain to him how the job makes you feel.. and meeting other cop wifes would help you deal with these emotions by seeing how they feel and how they handle it. Then if he still has no interest in going, then I wouldnt push the issue. Its not worth getting all stressed out over while pregnant.

Re: I've been awake all night. Please tell me how you would feel about this situation. (Pls don't quote I have to take this down in a few).

Honestly, he shouldn't have lied but I don't understand why you're upset that he doesn't want to go to his Christmas party. If I didn't want to go to my office holiday party, there's nothing DH could say to convince me. I know these things, they can get out of hand with the drinking - is that his thing? Maybe he thinks its not the place to bring his pregnant wife? Maybe he just sees enough of these people at work and has no need to drop $200 on a night out?
Whatever the reason may be, I don't think I'd be mad at all

Re: I've been awake all night. Please tell me how you would feel about this situation. (Pls don't quote I have to take this down in a few).

If it was me... I would fight to go to the party. You have every right to meet the other employees, especially since this
is a holiday party where they can bring a guest. Do you think he is hiding something from you?

Re: I've been awake all night. Please tell me how you would feel about this situation. (Pls don't quote I have to take this down in a few).

Some people (like my DH) just like to keep there private lives private. I would be more upset because he already said you can go and bring friends, now you have to back out with your friends, too.

Re: I've been awake all night. Please tell me how you would feel about this situation. (Pls don't quote I have to take this down in a few).

Re: I've been awake all night. Please tell me how you would feel about this situation. (Pls don't quote I have to take this down in a few).

I dont think hes doing anything wrong...he doesnt want to go.
If it were your Christmas party and he didnt want to go that would be another story. Cant you guys just go out on the town and wear your outfit and do something fun in the city??? Thats what it sounds like you ight be looking for. A fun night out.

Re: I've been awake all night. Please tell me how you would feel about this situation. (Pls don't quote I have to take this down in a few).

My DH is a cop and most of the time he isnt interested in going anywhere outside of the job with his coworkers.

Its a diff type of job and most of time there is some competition, conflicts and cattiness (BAD) and like my DH, he dosent have a lot in common with the ones he does work with.
I can understand why he wouldnt want to attend or take me with him at times.

Could be the same with your DH.

Re: I've been awake all night. Please tell me how you would feel about this situation. (Pls don't quote I have to take this down in a few).

To be honest, I wouldn't be upset if DH didnt want to go to his holiday party. Heck, I didn't even want to go to mine, (even though I love the people I work with)LOL! Maybe he just wants to keep his life out of work private, kwim? I was also going to say what Smileyd17 did,,,,being a cop is alot different than some corporate jobs. Maybe he doesn't want to be bothered

Message edited 12/12/2008 9:43:31 AM.

Re: I've been awake all night. Please tell me how you would feel about this situation. (Pls don't quote I have to take this down in a few).

to be honest--my DH is also a cop and he went to this xmas party last year---and i didn't. this year he's deciding not to go. but really, for the most part---the cops in my DH's precinct do NOT invite spouses/girlfriends to go to the party. i don't see it as anything bad, since its more of a boys night out for them.

while he shouldn't have lied about telling you about the party and such--i gotta say i think you might be overreacting a teeny bit about being upset that he doesn't want to go. i mean why should you guys spend $$$$ to go somewhere where you don't know most of the people there...and trust me...it will not be that exciting as i would bet anything that most of the cops going are NOT taking their significant others. you can't drink...so that's a waste of money right there for the all inclusive price....and it will be loud and hard to even "get to know" people he works with anyway. if anything i'd take it as a nice thing that he's deciding to not go and spend time with YOU anyway...that's actually very sweet IMHO! he's foregoing a $$ party to have dinner with his wife!

maybe you should step back from this and really look at it and realize that he's doing the right thing here...and there will be plenty of time to meet co-workers and such. heck after his first 6 mos. as a rookie....many times they transfer you out of the pct into another one, so he might have new co-workers soon anyway.

Re: I've been awake all night. Please tell me how you would feel about this situation. (Pls don't quote I have to take this down in a few).

I would have went to my husband's Christmas party, but with all of the budget cuts and potential lay offs, they were not allowed to bring any guests. As long as you are sure that your husband is not hiding anything from you, then you should just try to make the best of everything and make other plans... Maybe ask him to go see a Broadway show and dinner out. Those are just some suggestions. Good luck!

Re: I've been awake all night. Please tell me how you would feel about this situation. (Pls don't quote I have to take this down in a few).

thanks ladies...

Re: I've been awake all night. Please tell me how you would feel about this situation. (Pls don't quote I have to take this down in a few).

I wouldn't be upset if he didn't want to go to his Christmas party. It's his job and his choice to go or not to go.

I don't even think this is something to argue about. There were plenty of times I didn't want to go to work functions - as much as I loved my co-workers. It's his job - his choice IMO!

Re: edited...

I would be super-suspicious