Do you plan pregnancies around big events in your life?

DH and I are fairly certain we are going to try for a 3rd . I know we want to wait until at least next spring to start ttc. I had fertility treatments with both of my so when I say planning it means that I have to literally clear time in my life for doctors and procedures. My brother is getting married next June and I sort of don't want to be pg for the wedding which when I say that out loud sounds ridiilous but its going to be an outdoor wedding, and I get huge fast. I'm worried my dress won't fit and I'll be uncomfy. My dh thinks I'm being silly. Have you ever planned a pg around an event? Is it sort of absurd to plan such a life changing decison around someone elses big day.

Do you plan pregnancies around big events in your life?

When we first started trying it was the end of September 2010... i decided to start then because my cousins wedding was the beginning of May and i didnt want to risk missing it... the way things turned out, id never plan trying around an event you never know what will happen.

Message edited 3/29/2013 8:58:29 AM.

Re: Do you plan pregnancies around big events in your life?

I was 8.5 months pregnant as a bridesmaid at my cousin's wedding...so no , but I think in your situation I may delay because after all, what is it...like a month? So skip April and go for May?

Re: Do you plan pregnancies around big events in your life?

No i don't think its absurd to try and plan around big events, but just know sometimes what you plan doesn't really end up happening when you planned it to happen... (sorry if that doesn't make sense!) Like for instance, I know for me, the optimal time for me to give birth coinciding with my benefits at work, is may or june because my vacation calendar ends at the end of august (you can't carry over any days into the next "year"). Well it turns out it took me longer than I thought to get pg (working with RE) and I ended up having DS in August (so, I ended up having to take more unpaid time vs having it covered by vacation time).

Good luck!!

Re: Do you plan pregnancies around big events in your life?

We delayed trying for a year because I started a new job. Then, we had a loss. I wanted a spring time/summer baby but that wasn't in the cards for us. We ended up having DD this past December.

You can plan all you want, just know it may not go according to your plan.

Re: Do you plan pregnancies around big events in your life?

Depends on how old you are.

We had IF issues, so our second was ASAP and we won't wait for anything for a third as soon as there is enough distance between my second and birth date of third (in retrospect, 18 months is too close!).

You never know... As you get older, your IF rate of getting pregnant goes down.

Do you plan pregnancies around big events in your life?

Never. It took 2 years for #1. If I tried to plan him around life envent she still wouldn't be here.

Re: Do you plan pregnancies around big events in your life?

Yes, I did. I knew I didn't want to be pregnant for my best friend's wedding, so we waited...it meant that we waited a whole year to try, but it was ok for us...

Re: Do you plan pregnancies around big events in your life?

The only thing we did was plan it so that I would be home maximum time with my kids bc I am a teacher. I also didn't want to start the year out on maternity leave. It was a long shot, but it worked

Re: Do you plan pregnancies around big events in your life?

No.

It took us 14 months to have #2, and I was pg when we took dd to Disney. There were no weddings or other big events that i was in, so we didn't put it off for any reason.

Do you plan pregnancies around big events in your life?

i would not wait ... there's always going to be something that will make you want to postpone and, at that rate, you'd never have the baby.

but it's obviously up to you - if you'd feel more comfortable waiting, then you definitely should.

Do you plan pregnancies around big events in your life?

Nope. It took us 18m to conceive and even though I'm due at the end of Apr and it coincides with many events I didn't care.

Do you plan pregnancies around big events in your life?

No - it's like that saying, you make plans and god laughs or however it goes.

Re: Do you plan pregnancies around big events in your life?

I guess I'm in the minority but I don't think there is anything wrong with holding off a few months until you pass a big event...I did the very same thing. I wanted to go to OBX for a last fun week before we jumped on the TTC #3 bandwagon...we put it off 2 extra months than we originally wanted. I had a blast on vacation and knew I wouldn't have been OK had I been pg (i get terrible morning sickness). I quickly got pg after (ended in ectopic) and then got pg the month after the ectopic.

Everything happens for a reason. Now I wouldn't necessarily advise someone to wait for a year or so (if age or fertilty is a factor) but a month or a few months? I don't think it's a big deal.

Re: Do you plan pregnancies around big events in your life?

I don't know I could go either way. We needed fertility treatments for my twins so I wouldn't have waited then. Ds #2 was a surprise so no planning there.

But right now I am watching my sister struggle for almost 2 years to conceive her second dc. I know she is kicking herself for waiting and planning.

Re: Do you plan pregnancies around big events in your life?

If I was only putting it off 1-2 months, maybe 3 - yes.

Anything more than that - no.

Do you plan pregnancies around big events in your life?

If it meant being 9 months pregnant for a wedding of someone I'm very close to and possibly missing the wedding if I went into labor early, I might put off ttc for one month, but I definitely wouldn't put it off just because I didn't want be pregnant at a wedding.

Re: Do you plan pregnancies around big events in your life?

nope

Do you plan pregnancies around big events in your life?

I needed IF treatments for my first. Second was a natural surprise. We are planning to have a third- but our friends are getting married in Cabo next July. I definitely don't want to be pregnant for that because it will be our first 'real' vacation as a couple. Ever. It's eiter try now or wait until after next July. We aren't ready right this second and so we will wait over a year- just for that one vacation.

Do you plan pregnancies around big events in your life?

Depends what it is. I would be hard pressed to plan a pregnancy around a one day type event. I would probably make an exception for something like skipping trying one month bc my girlfriends were all going away for a bachelorette party weekend or something. Anything beyond that I quite frankly think is silly. You can have plenty of fun at a wedding even very preg. I was a bm at like 7 months and it was a long day for me but I would never have altered my plans over it. Something like a new job is different IMO. That's more like a life plan than a planning a pregnancy around something.

Re: Do you plan pregnancies around big events in your life?

I didn't. But I don't think it's absurd or anything. Everyone and every situation is different.

With that said, if I needed fertility treatments to get pg I don't think I would wait.

Good Luck with TTC!

Re: Do you plan pregnancies around big events in your life?

I kinda of have the opposite thing going.

I wanted to wait a few months to start trying bc my family was planning a big Mediterranean trip. I wanted to wait just a few months so I wouldn't be in my third trimester and I would at least have the option to go.

We decided not to wait bc who knew how long it would take conceive (this is my first). Well what do you know I got my BFP 2 weeks after we started trying.

At the end of the day, I feel like things will never go exactly how you planned. If you want to wait a month or 2 or 3 that's not a big deal, but def wouldn't wait longer than that.

Re: Do you plan pregnancies around big events in your life?

no I wouldn't plan it around it.....

because dr told me get them in by 35, if I delay because of an event, there is no guarantee it will happen right away, we had 2 m/c before our ds and dd.

Re: Do you plan pregnancies around big events in your life?

I am currently planning my second around a big family vacation. I'm young (27), so I feel like I have a bit of flexibility. I wanted to get pregnant this winter (and be due in Sept-Oct), but instead, I'm going to be trying the month I wanted to be due!! Putting off TTC for about 8-9 months.

Re: Do you plan pregnancies around big events in your life?

Thanks everyone. I think DH is right I am being a bit silly. I still think we may push back ttc a month or two and start in May instead of March. I feel like at 31 I still have some flexibility. If we are blessed to have a 3rd I don't think 2 or 3 months will play that much of a role.