Do these type of Parties irk you?

I accepted an invite to someone's home for a party over the holidays. It's just me - no family invited. The host said " so glad you are coming...come anytime after 5.30 pm and bring an app to share and a gift for about $25 for a yankee swap".. I literally groaned. She is a work acquaintance and I accepted because she has invited me to events before and I didn't go.

It just means that I have to shop for another gift and cook!!!! its already such a stressful season that these type of invites just add to the stress.

Sigh....wish I hadn't accepted.

is it just me?

Re: Do these type of Parties irk you?

Yeah that would piss me off.
When you are invited to my home i don't expect you to bring anything.
Eveyone asks and wont' come empty handed, so I say, ok bring wine or beer or dessert- but I would never tell them to bring an app that requires prep and cooking.


And what the eff is a "Yankee swap"???

Message edited 12/16/2016 5:22:41 PM.

Re: Do these type of Parties irk you?

Yeah, that's uncool.

Re: Do these type of Parties irk you?

See I always bring wine / beer and this time of the year maybe chocolates or something I can pick up at the store but having to bring an app to share is just.......the swap thing is that everyone buys something for $25 and then you grab something from this collection of gifts that at this time of the year are extra stress gifts - uggh.....bah humbug but really do you need to add to my stress? I thought it would be nice to get out of the house for a couple of hours and not have to deal with dinner prep here..,not I have to prep before I go.

Message edited 12/16/2016 5:29:26 PM.

Re: Do these type of Parties irk you?

That would piss me off too.
If I were you I'd bring a bag of chips and a container of guac. That's considered an app that everyone can share!

Do these type of Parties irk you?

I never heard of a Yankee Swap
But I would be grateful to know what to bring because it's a crime to come empty handed!

I am going to a party tomorrow where they said they are collecting toys for toys for tots. Then today the host said "hey just FYI we are serving apps and food plus drinks but no sweets" well ok thanks.. I'll grab a tray of cookies at the bakery tomorrow.

I feel RELIEVED!

NO one in their right mind shows up without SOMETHING. I passed it along to the others going. The apps, food and drinks are covered. Bring sweets!

Cook it or buy it. I could bake my Bacardi pie but don't want to. Or my Rum cake but don't want to. haha They are getting cookies! Oh wait.. maybe the rum cake.. hrm....

Meh. I sort of expect it.

Re: Do these type of Parties irk you?

Re: Do these type of Parties irk you?

I would NEVER go empty handed but I usually grab a bottle of wine etc...I am not someone who would bring a bag of chips etc ( although I am tempted :) ) so I will put thought and care into preparing an appetizer for people to share PLUs thought into buying a gift....

Invite did not say anything about bringing food or gifts - it was a Surprise!!!

Message edited 12/16/2016 5:39:22 PM.

Re: Do these type of Parties irk you?

Grab one of those meat and cheese platters from stop and shop as app(forget making something)

And go to one store ... Kohl's, target. And find something worth $25. A throw blanket or maybe a tin of popcorn w/ a Netflix GC for $20. Or see if there's something funny like a funny board game

Don't go crazy. and if this wasn't part of the invite, you could totally bail. Blame family obligation you forgot or whatever.

Message edited 12/16/2016 5:42:42 PM.

Re: Do these type of Parties irk you?

This is what I mean, it's uncool that she didn't mention any of this in her invite. At least you would've known what was expected of you at this party before you accepted. Of course everyone brings something for the host when they're invited somewhere (well, most people do, of course I know someone who shows up empty-handed everywhere they go but I digress) as that's just well-mannered polite social etiquette. But many people just bring a bottle of wine or alcohol or dessert they just pick up at a bakery. This coworker should have mentioned to bring an app and a gift beforehand.

Do these type of Parties irk you?

the "rules" should have all been on the invite - all upfront. Annoying that it wasn't made known until after you accepted

Re: Do these type of Parties irk you?

that sounds like our work potlucks. yeah no thanks. I'd suddenly find somewhere else I have to be that day.

Re: Do these type of Parties irk you?

Tacky to tell people to bring anything. if you are too cheap to be a proper host, then don't invite people over.

Some people are just better off as guests. It's unfortunate they don't realize how tacky they are. "Bring an appetizer" claaaasss-y!

Message edited 12/16/2016 7:49:32 PM.

Re: Do these type of Parties irk you?

This is why I turn down all invites to those types of parties.

Re: Do these type of Parties irk you?

I must be in the minority but this would not bother me. We always bring something so I wouldn't care if it was an appetizer or dessert.

Message edited 12/16/2016 8:49:27 PM.

Re: Do these type of Parties irk you?

It would bother me if this wasn't clear from the beginning.
For an easy app get garlic knots from the pizza place and maybe a bottle of wine and/ or a gift card for the gift swap.

Re: Do these type of Parties irk you?

If I accept a invite to a Christmas party I would be pretty sure there may be a swap of gifts

Re: Do these type of Parties irk you?

Message edited 12/17/2016 12:24:40 AM.

Re: Do these type of Parties irk you?

To each their own

Every holiday party I've ever been too,probably 9 out of 10 had a grab bag,Chinese auction,gift card swap. Something

Re: Do these type of Parties irk you?

Eh. I don't mind bringing apps or dessert to a party so this wouldn't bother me. In fact, I always ask a hostess if there is something I could bring.

As for the gift thing..................FUN!!! I've been invited to all kinds of holidays parties including ornament swaps, white elephants, grab bags, etc. They are VERY common this time of year and lots of fun.

Instead of getting annoyed why not just embrace it and go have fun!! You might be pleasantly surprised. And apps are easy to bring, you can pick up all kinds of pre-made goodies in the store.

Re: Do these type of Parties irk you?

If you have a BJ''s membership, the have good gift stuff.
Cuisinart cordless wine bottle opener is 16.99, add a bottle.
Brookstone snack dispenser is 17.99, add bag of nuts or m&m

I would be irked that the info about the app and gift came after the invite.
We had a family holiday get together today that got cancelled, so now I have the above 2 items for next year. At least I didn't start baking.

Re: Do these type of Parties irk you?

Re: Do these type of Parties irk you?

Re: Do these type of Parties irk you?

Yes I'd hate that. I'd be glad to bring food but I'm not a fan of the grab bag/ secret santa/ gift swap/ etc.

Re: Do these type of Parties irk you?

It should have been clearly stated on the invite from the beginning, you are 100% correct, but I wouldn't be too annoyed about it. You could always say something came up if you don't want to go now.

If I was going, I wouldn't go out of my way to make something like I normally would if I knew about this ahead of time. Stop off and pick up a prepared app tray, shrimp cocktail or cheese and cracker platter, and go to a liquor store and pick up a nice bottle of wine or liquor/tumbler set and have them wrap it. No need to trouble yourself. Or you could always say you wish not to participate in the grab bag and sit it out.