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bella321
Blessed!
Member since 3/09 1952 total posts
Name:
Kristy
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Another fence & neighbor situation
Clearly, you can't make everyone happy. 
DH and I decided to replace an old chainlink fence in our backyard with what we liked / could afford. A basic stockade. We needed to remove an existing tree on the property line and cut into the chainlink first.
Our neighbors (who have lived next door to us for several years but we very rarely see / speak to) have a small dog so I wanted to let them know we were NOT going to leave a significant gap in fence and that we were going to replace it. DC were sick over the weekend so I messaged her on FB (I didn't feel comfortable knocking on her door, also).
She writes me back and says that she wishes we had spoken to her and her husband first (as if to take in to consideration their preference). She made no mention of wanting to contribute financially (which I would not expect her to).
So, if I pay for a new fence 100%, I'm expected to ask my neighbors likes / dislikes first? 
I thought they would be appreciative that we were replacing the fence in the first place.
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Posted 6/15/15 3:12 PM  |
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Long Island Weddings
Long Island's Largest Bridal Resource |
ds319
LIF Adolescent
Member since 5/07 659 total posts
Name:
Dena
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Re: Another fence & neighbor situation
We had a pretty shoddy stockade fence that was barely keeping our dogs in. We got it replaced last year. Told all of our neighbors on three sides when we were doing it so they knew. Do you know my one neighbor had the nerve to tell me she didn't want a white fence?! I did not ask anyone for $$ nor would I ever. The stockade was mine to replace. You can't please everyone - just do what you want 
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| Posted 6/15/15 3:15 PM |
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JennZ
MY LIFE!!
Member since 8/05 25463 total posts
Name:
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Another fence & neighbor situation
No! I never understood that whole ask your neighbor to contribute and or their opinion on style. You're shelling out the money it's on YOUR property,screw them..
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| Posted 6/15/15 3:15 PM |
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jessnbrian
Only God knows His plan for us
Member since 4/13 7238 total posts
Name:
Jessica
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Another fence & neighbor situation
I think maybe she meant if you had talked to her first they might have split that side of the fence for something they liked better... That said, you are under no obligation.
We just replaced ours, we didn't even tell all the neighbors, only the ones that we actually see and talk to. No one said boo.
Message edited 6/15/2015 3:22:02 PM.
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| Posted 6/15/15 3:21 PM |
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Paramount
Sweet!
Member since 7/12 4289 total posts
Name:
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Another fence & neighbor situation
Does not matter what she meant, wants etc.
Its YOUR fence. You do what you like. Balls. She has balls to say "I wish you had asked".
Why? Because she thinks she would have any input? If you were re-doing the kitchen would she want input on that too?
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| Posted 6/15/15 3:23 PM |
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JDubs
different, not less
Member since 7/09 13160 total posts
Name:
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Re: Another fence & neighbor situation
Posted by JennZ
No! I never understood that whole ask your neighbor to contribute and or their opinion on style. You're shelling out the money it's on YOUR property,screw them..
This.
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| Posted 6/15/15 3:24 PM |
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jessnbrian
Only God knows His plan for us
Member since 4/13 7238 total posts
Name:
Jessica
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Re: Another fence & neighbor situation
Posted by Paramount
Does not matter what she meant, wants etc.
Its YOUR fence. You do what you like. Balls. She has balls to say "I wish you had asked".
Why? Because she thinks she would have any input? If you were re-doing the kitchen would she want input on that too?
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| Posted 6/15/15 3:24 PM |
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hmm
Sweet
Member since 1/14 8016 total posts
Name:
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Another fence & neighbor situation
First, I don't think it was appropriate to have FB her about the fence. Knocking on the door would have been more favorable especially of the tree was on the property line you share with them.
I'm not understanding the part about the space being left?? I always had a basic wood stock fence and had a dog and it was fine.
I dont think its about asking them if they like/dislike the choice but more letting them know work will be done especially if they have a dog so they can leave the dog inside
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| Posted 6/15/15 3:34 PM |
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nferrandi
too excited for words
Member since 10/05 18538 total posts
Name:
Nicole
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Re: Another fence & neighbor situation
I would probably reply something like, "my DH and I will be covering the cost of the fence and will be sure to have the good side facing your yard." And just leave it at that.
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| Posted 6/15/15 3:48 PM |
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MsSissy
xoxoxo
Member since 3/07 39159 total posts
Name:
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Re: Another fence & neighbor situation
Posted by bella321
We needed to remove an existing tree on the property line and cut into the chainlink first.
Maybe this is what she was referring to?
If it's on the property line maybe they didn't want it removed?
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| Posted 6/15/15 3:55 PM |
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NervousNell
Just another chapter in life..
Member since 11/09 54921 total posts
Name:
..being a mommy and being a wife!
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Re: Another fence & neighbor situation
Posted by MsSissy
Posted by bella321
We needed to remove an existing tree on the property line and cut into the chainlink first.
Maybe this is what she was referring to?
If it's on the property line maybe they didn't want it removed?
Or did you remove a section of fence first and THEN tell her?
Maybe she just meant she wishes you told her ahead of time so she would know to be careful when letting the dog out...being that there is a big gap in the fence now?
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| Posted 6/15/15 3:59 PM |
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blu6385
Member since 5/08 8351 total posts
Name:
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Re: Another fence & neighbor situation
the fence and tree have to belong to someone and it should have been made clear whose fence it was.
if its on your property than letting her know was just being nice and giving a heads up.
if its her she has every right to tell you now and you would just have to put a fence up right next to hers.
when I moved In to my house (the weekend of sandy) I was getting the fence replaces on most sides of the house the one we shared with the neighbor their fence ended up falling down during the storm we told them we were planning on putting up a new one anyway were they ok with us taking the one that fell down completely down and they were of course fine with it. i think they offered to pay us if they did we didn't take it.
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| Posted 6/15/15 4:04 PM |
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MrsD121011
LIF Adult
Member since 5/12 1460 total posts
Name:
Elicia
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Another fence & neighbor situation
My parents just had their fence redone and one of their neighbors had the gall to tell the fence guys as they were installing the fence to put the "nice" side facing her property. AND THEY DID! So now my parents have 3 side of smooth fence and one side of the posts showing! I was so mad for them, she's lucky my dad and mom are pretty easy going! Can you imagine the b****s on that woman! Ugh! I would tell her that she is always welcome to install a fence of her property of her liking in front of yours. 
Message edited 6/15/2015 4:36:35 PM.
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| Posted 6/15/15 4:15 PM |
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MrsM84
LIF Adult
Member since 2/13 2352 total posts
Name:
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Re: Another fence & neighbor situation
Posted by MrsD121011
My parents just had thier fence redone and one of their neighbors had the gall to tell the fence guys as they were installing the fence to put the "nice" side facing her property. AND THEY DID! So now my parents have 3 side of smooth fence and one side of the posts showing! I was so mad for them but shes luck my dad and mom are pretty easy going but can you imagine the b****s on that woman! Ugh! I would tell her that she is always welcome to install a fence of her property of her liking in front of yours.
Yes, the woman next door has some major balls but this is the fence companies fault. Why the hell would you listen to the requests of someone who isn't the customer?!?! Boggles my mind. If I were your parents, I'd call the fence company, tell them what happened and demand at least a partial refund. Ridiculous.
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| Posted 6/15/15 4:37 PM |
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nferrandi
too excited for words
Member since 10/05 18538 total posts
Name:
Nicole
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Re: Another fence & neighbor situation
Posted by MrsM84
Posted by MrsD121011
My parents just had thier fence redone and one of their neighbors had the gall to tell the fence guys as they were installing the fence to put the "nice" side facing her property. AND THEY DID! So now my parents have 3 side of smooth fence and one side of the posts showing! I was so mad for them but shes luck my dad and mom are pretty easy going but can you imagine the b****s on that woman! Ugh! I would tell her that she is always welcome to install a fence of her property of her liking in front of yours.
Yes, the woman next door has some major balls but this is the fence companies fault. Why the hell would you listen to the requests of someone who isn't the customer?!?! Boggles my mind. If I were your parents, I'd call the fence company, tell them what happened and demand at least a partial refund. Ridiculous.
You have to give your neighbors the "good" side
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| Posted 6/15/15 4:59 PM |
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VickiC
Rocking the party
Member since 5/05 4937 total posts
Name:
Vicki
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Re: Another fence & neighbor situation
Posted by MrsD121011
My parents just had their fence redone and one of their neighbors had the gall to tell the fence guys as they were installing the fence to put the "nice" side facing her property. AND THEY DID! So now my parents have 3 side of smooth fence and one side of the posts showing! I was so mad for them, she's lucky my dad and mom are pretty easy going! Can you imagine the b****s on that woman! Ugh! I would tell her that she is always welcome to install a fence of her property of her liking in front of yours.
Ummm, the nice side IS supposed to face your neighbors. It prevents people from climbing over the fence and into your yard. That's just proper fence etiquette anyway if getting a standard stockade fence. The fence company should have done this on all sides anyway.
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| Posted 6/15/15 5:11 PM |
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JennZ
MY LIFE!!
Member since 8/05 25463 total posts
Name:
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Re: Another fence & neighbor situation
Posted by nferrandi
Posted by MrsM84
Posted by MrsD121011
My parents just had thier fence redone and one of their neighbors had the gall to tell the fence guys as they were installing the fence to put the "nice" side facing her property. AND THEY DID! So now my parents have 3 side of smooth fence and one side of the posts showing! I was so mad for them but shes luck my dad and mom are pretty easy going but can you imagine the b****s on that woman! Ugh! I would tell her that she is always welcome to install a fence of her property of her liking in front of yours.
Yes, the woman next door has some major balls but this is the fence companies fault. Why the hell would you listen to the requests of someone who isn't the customer?!?! Boggles my mind. If I were your parents, I'd call the fence company, tell them what happened and demand at least a partial refund. Ridiculous.
You have to give your neighbors the "good" side
No you don't. Only if you have a pool because the wood fence can be used as a ladder by a neighbor to climb over.
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| Posted 6/15/15 5:15 PM |
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MrsD121011
LIF Adult
Member since 5/12 1460 total posts
Name:
Elicia
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Re: Another fence & neighbor situation
Posted by VickiC
Posted by MrsD121011
My parents just had their fence redone and one of their neighbors had the gall to tell the fence guys as they were installing the fence to put the "nice" side facing her property. AND THEY DID! So now my parents have 3 side of smooth fence and one side of the posts showing! I was so mad for them, she's lucky my dad and mom are pretty easy going! Can you imagine the b****s on that woman! Ugh! I would tell her that she is always welcome to install a fence of her property of her liking in front of yours.
Ummm, the nice side IS supposed to face your neighbors. It prevents people from climbing over the fence and into your yard. That's just proper fence etiquette anyway if getting a standard stockade fence. The fence company should have done this on all sides anyway.
My Dad actually looked into it and in some counties yes the "Good side goes on the outside is mandatory" but not in Suffolk...its up to the home owner. So its not a rule, its preference. As far as people climbing over...my parents dont worry about that stuff lol. The neighbors are all fenced in as well. But the women was out of line, it was rude.
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| Posted 6/15/15 5:26 PM |
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alli3131
Peanut is here!!!!!!
Member since 5/09 18388 total posts
Name:
Allison
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Re: Another fence & neighbor situation
Posted by MrsD121011
Posted by VickiC
Posted by MrsD121011
My parents just had their fence redone and one of their neighbors had the gall to tell the fence guys as they were installing the fence to put the "nice" side facing her property. AND THEY DID! So now my parents have 3 side of smooth fence and one side of the posts showing! I was so mad for them, she's lucky my dad and mom are pretty easy going! Can you imagine the b****s on that woman! Ugh! I would tell her that she is always welcome to install a fence of her property of her liking in front of yours.
Ummm, the nice side IS supposed to face your neighbors. It prevents people from climbing over the fence and into your yard. That's just proper fence etiquette anyway if getting a standard stockade fence. The fence company should have done this on all sides anyway.
My Dad actually looked into it and in some counties yes the "Good side goes on the outside is mandatory" but not in Suffolk...its up to the home owner. So its not a rule, its preference. As far as people climbing over...my parents dont worry about that stuff lol. The neighbors are all fenced in as well. But the women was out of line, it was rude.
Fence ordinances go by town not county. Plenty in Suffolk you need good side out. I have lived in 2 that require it.
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| Posted 6/15/15 5:49 PM |
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BAK217
LIF Infant
Member since 8/14 344 total posts
Name:
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Re: Another fence & neighbor situation
When we replaced our old fence, I informed the neighbors behind us a few days before as a matter of courtesy.....because the workers would be on their property.
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| Posted 6/15/15 6:59 PM |
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hmm
Sweet
Member since 1/14 8016 total posts
Name:
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Re: Another fence & neighbor situation
Posted by MrsD121011
My parents just had their fence redone and one of their neighbors had the gall to tell the fence guys as they were installing the fence to put the "nice" side facing her property. AND THEY DID! So now my parents have 3 side of smooth fence and one side of the posts showing! I was so mad for them, she's lucky my dad and mom are pretty easy going! Can you imagine the b****s on that woman! Ugh! I would tell her that she is always welcome to install a fence of her property of her liking in front of yours.
actually the nice side is suppose to face out not into your own property, so the neighbor is correct and that is the way the company should have placed it to begin with
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| Posted 6/15/15 7:02 PM |
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hmm
Sweet
Member since 1/14 8016 total posts
Name:
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Re: Another fence & neighbor situation
Posted by VickiC
Posted by MrsD121011
My parents just had their fence redone and one of their neighbors had the gall to tell the fence guys as they were installing the fence to put the "nice" side facing her property. AND THEY DID! So now my parents have 3 side of smooth fence and one side of the posts showing! I was so mad for them, she's lucky my dad and mom are pretty easy going! Can you imagine the b****s on that woman! Ugh! I would tell her that she is always welcome to install a fence of her property of her liking in front of yours.
Ummm, the nice side IS supposed to face your neighbors. It prevents people from climbing over the fence and into your yard. That's just proper fence etiquette anyway if getting a standard stockade fence. The fence company should have done this on all sides anyway.
oops I just said this and read your post after or I would have
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| Posted 6/15/15 7:04 PM |
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newbie00
LIF Adult
Member since 3/11 1191 total posts
Name:
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Re: Another fence & neighbor situation
Posted by VickiC
Posted by MrsD121011
My parents just had their fence redone and one of their neighbors had the gall to tell the fence guys as they were installing the fence to put the "nice" side facing her property. AND THEY DID! So now my parents have 3 side of smooth fence and one side of the posts showing! I was so mad for them, she's lucky my dad and mom are pretty easy going! Can you imagine the b****s on that woman! Ugh! I would tell her that she is always welcome to install a fence of her property of her liking in front of yours.
Ummm, the nice side IS supposed to face your neighbors. It prevents people from climbing over the fence and into your yard. That's just proper fence etiquette anyway if getting a standard stockade fence. The fence company should have done this on all sides anyway.
Not all towns require the nice side to be facing out unless you have a pool. And what is this proper fence etiquette? I pay for the fence I get the nice side. The fence installers should have never listened to the neighbor. If I was your parents I would definitely call the company and tell them to come and reinstall it the way they want it, especially since they installed the other three sides with the posts out.
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| Posted 6/15/15 7:04 PM |
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MomMom
LIF Toddler
Member since 9/10 428 total posts
Name:
hi
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Re: Another fence & neighbor situation
Posted by nferrandi
You have to give your neighbors the "good" side
Not in every town. In the Town of Huntington, you do NOT need to give your neighbor the good side. It says so in the town code.
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| Posted 6/15/15 10:41 PM |
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Blubtrflygrl
LIF Adolescent
Member since 5/15 609 total posts
Name:
allison
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Re: Another fence & neighbor situation
Proper "fence etiquette"?
Or "LIF fence etiquette"?
Never heard of such a thing!!!
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| Posted 6/16/15 5:19 AM |
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