really feel like giving up *updated*

i caved and tested a day early (11dpo) and BFN. i don't know why i didn't just wait for tomorrow because my temp started to drop a few days ago, so the chances of this being my month were already pretty slim. i'm expecting AF to rear her ugly head tomorrow.

this has now been 8 months of failing at TTC with 2 early m/c sprinkled in between.

scheduled has started to strain my relationship with DH. not these he's not supportive. it's just a hard thing when it goes on for this long. i don't know how much more stamina i have for this.

and on top of this, i keep having pregnant dreams that are really upsetting when i wake up, therefore i'm posting on LIF @ 4am

**updated**

i started clomid yesterday and am feeling much more optimistic than i was on CD1. it's the very first step i'm taking in any kind of IF treatment after 8 months of deliberate ttc and 7 months of casual, unprotected BD. when i left the RE office, he shook my hand and said, "here we go!"

thanks for all the support

Message edited 11/23/2010 5:40:00 AM.

Re: really feel like giving up

It's very hard, and I can relate to having those dreams! When I first lost my son, I would often wake up (sometimes from dreams, sometimes not..) and for the first few moments, forgot that I was no longer pregnant. Everyday it was like finding out all over again that I was going through a living nightmare

If you think it would benefit you then take a break- but my feeling is I know I won't feel better until I am pregnant so at this point I am just going to keeping going till I get there, regardless of what it takes. I am currently seeing an RE, the way I did the first time I got pregnant.

Re: really feel like giving up

sometimes a break is good sometimes just venting about it makes you feel better ....

Re: really feel like giving up

So sorry!

Re: really feel like giving up

I'm so sorry ITA about the scheduled BDing for many months taking a toll I really hope it happens very soon for you!

Re: really feel like giving up

Re: really feel like giving up

So Sorry! I know what you mean... it's really frustrating and it does put a strain on things.

Re: really feel like giving up

thanks everyone for the support &

we had taken a break (in between m/c) for 6 months from trying to try, hoping going with the flow was a better way and nada, so it's actually been longer than 8 months.

i think it's time to press my RE for something more aggressive. when i went, he did a whole bunch of tests for multiple m/c and everything came back normal, so he wished me well on my journey with "timed intercourse." i really can't do this any more.

Re: really feel like giving up

Hang in there...Its alot easier said but try not to dwell on it so much u need to be there for Dh & he needs to be there for you...Im a firm believer in everything happens for a reason!!

Re: really feel like giving up

Re: really feel like giving up

I know how you feel about putting a strain on your relationship because that is what happened to me too. It is such a hard thing to go through month after month.

Re: really feel like giving up

i feel exactly the same way but i cant give up...its something we want and we r going to keep trying...its get hard but find ways to keep ur spirits up..even if it means trying but not going crazy..thats what i think i am going to do cause latley its just getting so hard


good luck!!!!!

Re: really feel like giving up

I know this feeling all too well. but giving up will just ensure you will not get that outcome you are looking for. That's how I looked at it.... so I persevered on.... giving up on trying just was not an option for me... I felt "you gotta be in it to win it"...

But sometimes taking a small break to gather your thoughts and emotions can be helpful.


Good Luck!!

Re: really feel like giving up

Re: really feel like giving up

I completely went through the same thing when I first started TTC with DD.

Re: really feel like giving up

I am currently TTC on my 5th month, so not as long but already the is starting to suck. DH doesn't like to be on a schedule, sometimes I feel like I am borderline forcing him!

And other nights I want to yell at him for certain things he did throughout the day, like not picking up after himself...but I know I have to be nice otherwise he won't want to TTC later, so I grit my teeth and smile and fake act sweet so we can .

It's so ridiculous!

Re: really feel like giving up

Don't give up!!! It WILL happen and you have to believe that!

It took DH and I over a year and 2 early m/c's before we got to where we are today....almost 14 weeks PG.

Keep your head up! Good luck to you!

Re: really feel like giving up

Re: really feel like giving up

Posted by PennyCat

Posted by MrsKS

giving up on trying just was not an option for me... I felt "you gotta be in it to win it"...

This is how I feel!! I would feel worse not even having a CHANCE at getting pregnant! At least I know no matter what, I'm doing all I can!!

Re: really feel like giving up *updated*

Posted by bookworm

Posted by PennyCat

Posted by MrsKS

giving up on trying just was not an option for me... I felt "you gotta be in it to win it"...

This is how I feel!! I would feel worse not even having a CHANCE at getting pregnant! At least I know no matter what, I'm doing all I can!!

this was just the moment i knew i had to push the RE for treatment instead of just testing. i went yesterday for CD3 sono/blood and he started me on clomid. DH has his SA today, so we'll see what comes of that.

this cycle was pretty devastating. i knew i couldn't go on like i was--with no help and just absorbing disappointment after disappointment.

i feel so much better now that the RE is involved.

Re: really feel like giving up *updated*

good luck!!!!

Re: really feel like giving up *updated*

just saw your update... keeping you in my prayers this was my first month on clomid... 6dpo! we'll see what happens

Re: really feel like giving up *updated*