Re: Registering for Housewarming - still tacky under these circumstances?

OK, I love ya, but Im being honest here....I do think its a little tacky. Would I judge your forever if I was an IRL friend....no of course not. Still, I agree with the above posters who said showers and weddings are really the only events that warrant a registry...IMO.

Maybe tacky isnt the right word, maybe TOO unconventional.

DH cousin did this, they had a justice of the peace wedding, no shower, etc and then registered for a housewarming party and it COMPLETELY backfired. People presumed since she had registered that she was expecting gifts even though it wasnt asked for outright. A lot of people were really put off by it and ended up coming with like a pot warmer or dish towel.

Now, if I were invited to a housewarming party, as a guest, and bc its the polite and courteous thing to do when you are invited to someones home......I would certainly bring you something anyway.

Its just the registering kind of makes you look like you are secretly expecting it. If you do though, its not the end of the world and I wouldnt hold it against you.

Re: Registering for Housewarming - still tacky under these circumstances?

When I go to a housewarming, I'll just bring a bottle of wine and possibly a small gift (like a photo frame).

I don't think I'd even ask someone what they needed, and if I did and was directed to a site with $50-$100 gifts, I would probably laugh.

Re: Registering for Housewarming - still tacky under these circumstances?

hmm....If I was invited to a housewarming, I would bring bottle of wine, maybe picture frame or vase...candle.
I would not bring a duvet or pots and pans.
So when I got to party and realized it was sort of a shower as well, I think I would feel like a cheap A$$.

Re: Registering for Housewarming - still tacky under these circumstances?

Re: Registering for Housewarming - still tacky under these circumstances?

in the minority, but the only things you should be registering for is a wedding or a baby. i do find it tacky to register for a housewarming, regardless of what was done or not done before. those were choices made before and you shouldn't try to make up for lost opportunties.

a housewarming party is done to welcome people into your new home, not to invite people in to furnish and fill it.

I'd be very turned off by this.

jmho.

Re: Registering for Housewarming - still tacky under these circumstances?

Personally, this is not my thing. But, I think you're in the clear of being majorly tacky since you didn't state it on the invites and are only mentioning it if people ask. Anyone who might find it tacky wouldn't even know. Only the ones who are openly asking you about it would find out. I really do not like registeries for anything but wedding and baby but in this case, the way it was handled, is probably the best case scenario.

Would I do it even in this situation? Probably not, sorry.

Message edited 6/18/2010 10:26:39 AM.

Re: Registering for Housewarming - still tacky under these circumstances?

Re: Registering for Housewarming - still tacky under these circumstances?

The first part is unimportant. I don't care how someone paid for a house or how big of a party they are electing to have. Using these reasons to justify feeling entitled to gifts is tacky.

However, the second part is reasonable.
People may ask about a registry, since they didn't have a shower. It does make it easier for some people, but they don't need to announce it.

And , I don't really see a difference between a registry & a wish list.

Message edited 6/18/2010 10:36:48 AM.

Re: Registering for Housewarming - still tacky under these circumstances?

I think people will bring items regardless, I wouldn't register. I just think people who don't know all your above mentioned details may find it tacky you did register, kwim?

Re: Registering for Housewarming - still tacky under these circumstances?

Re: Registering for Housewarming - still tacky under these circumstances?

with all those reasons... no way!! totally reasonable!!!

Re: Registering for Housewarming - still tacky under these circumstances?

It's not all out tacky, but I still do not like the idea of registering for a housewarming.

Having a big party with entertainment and what not for a housewarming is a choice of the host. So I wouldn't think "well they didn't get gifts for an e party, wedding, shower, etc. so I should make up for it here!"

I think most guests would bring something to the party anyway, but any type of registry is still tacky, no matter the circumstances.

In this particular situation I don't think it would as off putting as other housewarming registries, but it would still seem sort of "off" to me, as a guest.

Re: Registering for Housewarming - still tacky under these circumstances?

Re: Registering for Housewarming - still tacky under these circumstances?

I don't think its tacky because you didn't put it on the invites..if you had that might have been a little much but honestly I don't think its that bad.

If anything, you get a COUPON from from places for a completion. If its for parents and close family, i don't think its tacky at all. ESP since you didn't have a wedding or shower or anything

Re: Registering for Housewarming - still tacky under these circumstances?

I don't think you should do it. No offense, but you chose not to have a shower or wedding reception.

Re: Registering for Housewarming - still tacky under these circumstances?

Those that ask must not think it is tacky and those that don't ask won't know to make that judgement so I think you are in the clear

Re: Registering for Housewarming - still tacky under these circumstances?

I really don't like the word "tacky" - it's such a condescending word.

What I would do is create a registry and not tell anyone about it. Maybe people will look it up and see that you are registered and buy stuff off of it anyway.

If they ask why you are registered you can say you registered for the completion - way before you bought your home. But I wouldn't tell anyone even if they asked specifically.

Re: Registering for Housewarming - still tacky under these circumstances?

Re: Registering for Housewarming - still tacky under these circumstances?

Go ahead and register. Given the circumstances you described, i.e., no bridal shower or engagement/wedding, not putting it on the invites, I think its perfectly acceptable.

This brings up something sort of related that I have thought about in the past, which is, what to do for my single friends, who were never married, have no kids, who are now buying houses or condos. I have two such friends and DH and I got them generous gift cards to Home Depot right after they closed. I didn't do it because I felt like I had too, it was really because I recognized all of their generosity to us over the years (bridal showers and baby showers, bachlorette parties and christening, etc.) and I wanted to acknowledge something for them in return.

I feel like you're in a similar situation, not having all of the traditional events, and I think everyone deserves to be showered with gifts at least once in their lives. To be honest, I think a lot of people enjoy helping out and would really want to get you a gift off of your registry.

Enjoy your party and your house!!

Message edited 6/19/2010 9:52:29 PM.

Re: Registering for Housewarming - still tacky under these circumstances?

Re: Registering for Housewarming - still tacky under these circumstances?

NOT tacky! There shouldn't be blanket rules for this stuff...too many variables. It's not like you're soliciting the gifts. You're making a list of what you want/need in case someone asks.

Re: Registering for Housewarming - still tacky under these circumstances?

Nope not tacky. and if u didnt have a big wedding or engament party i would of sent the registar cards with the invites. It ur turn to reep the benefits of marriage n home buyung not tacky at all Plus ppl are going to buy u a house warming gift neway most likly so i would rather get something i wanted then something they think is cool :)

Re: Registering for Housewarming - still tacky under these circumstances?

Posted by KateDevine

I don't think you should do it. No offense, but you chose not to have a shower or wedding reception.

Re: Registering for Housewarming - still tacky under these circumstances?

Posted by ihilani

Posted by KateDevine

I don't think you should do it. No offense, but you chose not to have a shower or wedding reception.

ITA. If I were a guest, I'd feel put off that I wasn't worthy enough to be invited to your wedding, but was adequate to be invited to this party.

If your neighbors are within hearing range of the DJ, you may want to invite them, too.