Re: How often do you get a break?

Rarely. DS is 13 months and I've never left him overnight. I'm just not ready yet.

But we've had a few date nights here and there. And I've had some girls nights. Maybe once a month I go out alone or DH and I go out together. I wish it was more frequent, but I feel bad asking people to sit b/c I feel this age is so high maintenence still. When he's older and can talk and express his needs I think I'll feel better about it.

Re: How often do you get a break?

Only when DS was an infant did my parents watch DS overnight (he was 3 and 5 months). My parents also watched him 2 days a week while I worked. They also babysit if we need to go somewhere. However, they have never just taken him to "give me a break." If I need time off, DH does something with him alone while I go do my thing.

Re: How often do you get a break?

This post is making me realize how lucky I am! My mom doesn't work so she'll take DD whenever I ask or sometimes she'll just offer. I'd say it probably averages on once a month. It may not have been under the premise of I need a break, but if I've had stuff to do that's easier to get done without DD. I'm a SAHM so we don't have steady childcare. She's also taken her when I've been sick (which is amazing). They take her overnight maybe once every 3 months. Usually overnights are because we have a wedding/party/dinner plans. I'm pregnant with my second now and we just moved so my parents have volunteered to take her more. My in-laws live in TX so they don't really have the opportunity.

I guess I never realized that this was the exception rather than the norm because growing up I slept at my grandparents house every other weekend or so and spent a few weeks in the summer with them as well. My DD is also the first grandkid on both sides so I'm sure that impacts it as well.

Re: How often do you get a break?

very very rarely ~ maybe 2x a year if I am lucky.

Re: How often do you get a break?

never

Re: How often do you get a break?

Ha what's that???

Very rarely if ever.

Re: How often do you get a break?

My parents live 2.5 hours away and DH's family live 1 hour from us. When we visit my parents or they visit us, they've watched DS so we could run errands, go out to dinner, etc. The first overnight was when DS was 2.5. I had a few weddings and bachlorette parties last summer. They watched DS overnight on those occasions. Before then, I really never had a reason to be away from DS overnight. They also watched DS for several days after we and our daycare had extended power outages after the 2 major storms last year.

DH's family has not watched DS overnight and has rarely watched him for even an hour or two.

Re: How often do you get a break?

Almost never, partly because we don't really have any family that can help, and partly because I don't trust anyone. I think twins is a totally different ball game tho.

Re: How often do you get a break?

Message edited 7/8/2012 12:23:33 PM.

Re: How often do you get a break?

My mom dosent work and loves to watch dd. She'll watch her whenever i need, usually 1-2 times a week while i do errands, ect. Mil also will watch her whenever we need but we only ask 2-3x a month usually. I am very lucky!

Re: How often do you get a break?

I've never had more than a 4 hour stretch by myself in the 2 years since DS has been born, and that has only been maybe 4 or 5 times. Once it was my IL's watching DS for my egg retrieval, the other few times DH watched him so I could run errands or get highlights.

Re: How often do you get a break?

My parents would probably do it whenever I asked but they watch the kids 2 days per week during the school year so I feel bad. For a while they were doing and overnight every 6 weeks or so and it was great. Need another one soon!

Re: How often do you get a break?

My kids are 2 and almost 4... both sets of grandparents and my two sisters watched them on a regular basis when we lived in NY, and would watch them overnight maybe once every 6 months as needed for a wedding or a trip to AC. I would have felt guilty asking them to watch the kids more than that, they are sweet but not easy kids

Re: How often do you get a break?

We left my DS with my parents overnight once...he was 7 months...my parents stayed over my house.
They come over every week...so my son knows them very well! They watch him at night (if we want to go out) all the time. Our anniversary was yesterday and they watched him so we could go to dinner.

Re: How often do you get a break?

We are going to Europe next week. This will be the first time DH and I go away together without the kids since DS#2 was born 16 months ago.

My parents live in NY and we live in DC now.

When we were still living in NY and we only had 1 child, DH and I went away alone about twice a year.

Re: How often do you get a break?

a couple times in the last almost 3 years and it has been my in laws or my sister my parents will have him for his first sleep over at the end of the month and thats because he keeps asking to sleep there

Re: How often do you get a break?

As often as we'd like. My parents practically beg me to leave DD with them for a sleepover. She has stayed with them probably about 6-10 times and she is 15 months old. We've never done it just to have a night off, it's always been for an occasion or because we needed to go out of town and couldn't take her with us. She just had a sleepover last night and DH and I went out for our anniversary. We are very lucky to have such eager sitters at our disposal. I can't imagine not ever having alone time with my DH.

Re: How often do you get a break?

Re: How often do you get a break?

I am a SAHM to 4yo and 14m old boys. During the day I never get a break. I have a great support system who would watch them, but honestly DS2 is a handful and I feel bad leaving him with others because I know it means never sitting .
At night I often go to the gym after DS2 goes to bed which I consider a break! lol

DH and I probably go out 1x a month using either my ILs or my niece to babysit.

As far as overnight, DS1 has stayed 2x with ILs when we had OOT weddings (Once for 4 nights and once for 2 nights) he has also had sleepovers at his cousin's house. BUt DS2 has never stayed anywhere but with us. I am planning a 1 night get away for DH and I this summer. My Ils are willing to watch the boys so we can go away but I would feel horrible simply because DS2 is alot of work (never sits still and its super attached to DH & I) and DS1 is 4 so not so bad but when its both of them its alot ot ask of others to watch them for a few days!

Re: How often do you get a break?

Yes, I do get some breaks from my boys, ages 2 and 4. I am a SAHM and my DH is gone for 10-11 hours each day, so I have plenty of time with the kids on my own.

We are very blessed that my parents are retired, have lots of energy, and love to spend time with my boys, and the feeling is mutual!

About once a month, DH and I go out alone or with friends, and my parents babysit. We also went to Aruba for 4 nights when my first son was 9 months and to Ireland a few months ago for 5 days. Both times, my parents babysat and we trust them implicitly.

I also try to go out with my girlfriends at least once a month, and did a weekend away with friends earlier this year.

I love being with my kids, and it was my dream to stay home with them. However, I also feel it is important to keep my marriage and my friendships strong as well. I also consider it a gift to my children for them to build relationships with people other than me. The more people that love them, the better!

Re: How often do you get a break?

This is not meant as an insult towards those who have never left their kids overnight (those with older kids) but for me, I can't imagine why people wouldn't want an overnight break!!

Some of the best weekends ever are the ones where my mom takes the kids for a night or two and DH and I get away alone...it is the most refreshing feeling to just be by ourselves, childfree for a nice long weekend. I know the kids are having a blast with my family and I know I will see them again within a day or two and its like we never left.

I have a friend who has yet to feel comfortable to get away for a night by herself with her DH. Her oldest is 6. She has NEVER had a night away except for when she delivered her second son and that doesn't count..lol. She WANTS to get away for a few days with just her DH but feels guilty. I don't understand that. I think its healthy for parents and for children to experience that. But I'm also a SAHM and with my kids all day, everyday so i feel zero guilt getting away without them here and there. She is a FTWM so i know it's a little different. I just wish she knew how great it is to get away and that the kids will be FINE.

Re: How often do you get a break?

What's a break?

Re: How often do you get a break?

DD has never been away from me overnight .

But I am very lucky b/c I can take a "break" whenever I need one - I usually just don't need one LOL if I want to do something for myself like get my nails done, I just leave work earlier and go then - DD naps until I get home anyway (she is home with my mom). If I want to go out with friends or DH, I put DD down to sleep at 8PM, hand my mom the monitor and head out for the night. . .

My 30th is in December and I would like to go away for the weekend but I am not sure if DH will be on board. I was planning a vacation to Aruba for our 5th anniversary but DH wouldn't leave her to go so we switched it to Disney

I have a lot of help, so I dont need to take breaks for the sake of taking breaks but its nice to have that option!

How often do you get a break?

I have never left DD overnight with anyone and she is 16 months. Very rarely do DH and I go out without her. We both work full time and the weekends are our time with her.

Occasionally one of us will go out by ourselves to get some "away" time but its only for a few hours. Usually my DH will go play golf or I will go and get my nails done. Last night I went with the girls to see "Magic Mike" and my DH stayed home with DD. On Saturday, my DH went to a brewery with the guys and I stayed home with DD.

Re: How often do you get a break?

my mom will sit if we ask and she is free, but we dont usually go out at night. we try to go to AC for our anniversary for one night, so thats once a year and either my mom and/my friend babysit.
We recently went away for 2 nites to montauk but my girlfriend babysat, she is much more reliable for an overnight sitter.
as far as local errands or appointments, the kids come or we have to pay our babysitter.
Help is scarce, especially with 3 kids (soon to be 4)