Im so confused!!!!!!!!!!!!

I need your help with this.

Recently I have been interviewing for a new job (primarily because I want more $$- I'm being straight up). I have been with this company for 4 years, so you can imagine, Im pretty comfortable here.

Anyhow, to make a long story short, I recently went on an interview at a company for a career changing position. Its actually an opportunity of a lifetime with great benefits, great salary and the opportunity to travel across the country from time to time (for business purposes). I went on 2 interviews with the company & nailed them both. My headhunter just called me now to tell me that they are about to offer me the job. Im super excited to know that the opportunity lies in my hands right now, however, Im faced with a real dilemma here....

See, thing is.. I just got married last Aug. I would love to get pregnant by the end of the year. I know that things dont always wok out the way we would like them too, however, I dont know if Im cut out to be a "career woman", so to speak. Im so used to coming to work, doing my thing then going home. With this new job, I have to give my 100%. With the job I have now, Im so relaxed and comfortable. If I did get pregnant, Im confident enough to know that if I needed time off, my bosses would understand.

Im so not explaining this the way I should. Im not even preggo yet & Im worried about this!! has anyone been in a similar situation? If so, how did you decide?

Re: Im so confused!!!!!!!!!!!!

I know what you mean, completely. I think you have to go with your gut and if that means passing up the job, then so be it. Think about 6 months from now - will you be in your new job and ecstatic? Or will you be wishing you were at your old job and TTCing? Or will you be at your job now wondering what the new one would be like? What is your heart telling you?

I can say from experience that I did not trust my gut feeling a few too many times before and I regret it.

Re: Im so confused!!!!!!!!!!!!

Janie, take the new career opportunity if it comes your way. You'll give 100% for the first few months and then realize that it's still a job and it's still work and you'll eventually (within a short time I suspect) reach that comfort level.

I think having a baby at the end of the year (or at least TTC) wouldn't be an issue for you or your position.

Re: Im so confused!!!!!!!!!!!!

I think you should take the opportunity for now.. who knows what the future will bring.. it might not be as time consuming as you think... and you can always change jobs again.
Leave the job you are at now on good terms, sometime down the line they might want you back!!

Re: Im so confused!!!!!!!!!!!!

Janie-You can't pass up a wonderful opportunity like this. I remember last year how miserable you were at this job & although things are better now, there is still a chance that it could go bad again. If you are going to TTC at the end of the year I don't forsee it being a problem wiht the new job. Go for it--no regrets!

Good luck! I am sure that yu will make the right decision.

Re: Im so confused!!!!!!!!!!!!

I was in this exact same boat exactly a year ago -- I was faced with the dilemma of taking an awesome job opportunity even though I knew I wanted to get PG within the year. I took the job and don't regret it for a second. Here is how it worked out for me. I gave it my all and proved to them what a valuable asset I was to the company. I got PG in October (didn't tell them until January). So now I am 8 months pregnant and because I have worked so hard over the last year I am in a great place to say to them that now I am having the baby I will need to achieve the right work/life balance or else this won't work out for me long term. And they are more than receptive to it. I know every company is different. I work for a really big international company and I think the reason I am so happy with my choice has to do with my boss and the relationship I've built with him. Others who work here may not be so accomodating. So that is just one perspective. But I remember being terrified about all of those things when I decided to make the change. Good luck -- go with your gut!

Re: Im so confused!!!!!!!!!!!!

I wouldn't let any opportunity pass you by.....

Re: Im so confused!!!!!!!!!!!!

Janie, I would take this job & don't let it pass you up. Like many have said, this is an opportunity for you that may not come along again. Yes it is quite hard to leave a job where you are comfy but in the long run, I think this new job will suit you better.

In regards to TTC by the end of the year, that does not have to be put on hold. Since you are not yet pg nor trying, it is not a concern at this time. You will cross that bridge when it happens

Re: Im so confused!!!!!!!!!!!!

I am in a somewhat similar situation. I would totally take the new opportunity without regret in your case!

Re: Im so confused!!!!!!!!!!!!

You guys are awesome..! I cant thank you all enough. Sometimes you just need to get the opinion of others to really put things in perspective.

Re: Im so confused!!!!!!!!!!!!

Re: Im so confused!!!!!!!!!!!!

Re: Im so confused!!!!!!!!!!!!

To be honest, I wouldn't take a job requiring a great deal of travel across the country if I was going to get PG or have a baby soon (you mention travel, but not how much). I've been in those jobs, and as a single person it was fun, but with a husband and child I cannot imagine having to leave to travel.

Re: Im so confused!!!!!!!!!!!!

what i would do is tell your current employer you were approached by a head hunter for a job that was more money and lots of perks. add in whatever perks you want. and tell him you went on the interview becuasue you wanted to see what the job entails and if your qualified for it. tell them you were offered the job but would like to stay where you are becuase you are loyal but need more money and more perks. see if they throw you a line if not then take the other job. if your not going to get pregnant till the end of the year you will already have 6 months in the new job. and see how it goes. pregnancy is 9 months so tack another 9 months on and your at 15 months in the company and you should be able to figure out your situation by then. good luck to you. hope that helps.

Re: Im so confused!!!!!!!!!!!!

Posted by SIBride06

Posted by MST9106

Posted by ChrissynRicky

Janie, take the new career opportunity if it comes your way. You'll give 100% for the first few months and then realize that it's still a job and it's still work and you'll eventually (within a short time I suspect) reach that comfort level.

I think having a baby at the end of the year (or at least TTC) wouldn't be an issue for you or your position.

I was just about to say the same thing! Go for it! How many times have you posted how unhappy you were at this job and how unappreciated you felt. This is a great growth opportunity for you and even if you start to TTC at the end of this year, that is more than enough time to get settled in and get comfortable! Plus the job will keep you busy and I'm sure won't be as stagnant as your current one...in any event - good luck!

Thank you Sylvia.... You would be very familiar with the company!

Re: Im so confused!!!!!!!!!!!!

Posted by MST9106

Posted by SIBride06

Posted by MST9106

Posted by ChrissynRicky

Janie, take the new career opportunity if it comes your way. You'll give 100% for the first few months and then realize that it's still a job and it's still work and you'll eventually (within a short time I suspect) reach that comfort level.

I think having a baby at the end of the year (or at least TTC) wouldn't be an issue for you or your position.

I was just about to say the same thing! Go for it! How many times have you posted how unhappy you were at this job and how unappreciated you felt. This is a great growth opportunity for you and even if you start to TTC at the end of this year, that is more than enough time to get settled in and get comfortable! Plus the job will keep you busy and I'm sure won't be as stagnant as your current one...in any event - good luck!

Thank you Sylvia.... You would be very familiar with the company!

NOOO???? Really?????

Re: Im so confused!!!!!!!!!!!!

good luck with what u chose

Re: Im so confused!!!!!!!!!!!!

Re: Im so confused!!!!!!!!!!!!

Posted by SIBride06

Posted by MST9106

Posted by SIBride06

Posted by MST9106

Posted by ChrissynRicky

Janie, take the new career opportunity if it comes your way. You'll give 100% for the first few months and then realize that it's still a job and it's still work and you'll eventually (within a short time I suspect) reach that comfort level.

I think having a baby at the end of the year (or at least TTC) wouldn't be an issue for you or your position.

I was just about to say the same thing! Go for it! How many times have you posted how unhappy you were at this job and how unappreciated you felt. This is a great growth opportunity for you and even if you start to TTC at the end of this year, that is more than enough time to get settled in and get comfortable! Plus the job will keep you busy and I'm sure won't be as stagnant as your current one...in any event - good luck!

Thank you Sylvia.... You would be very familiar with the company!

NOOO???? Really?????

Yes ...Its actually one of the smaller divisions of the company we are both thinking of.

Re: Im so confused!!!!!!!!!!!!

I'm going to have to play devil's advocate here.

I went through the same exact situation 2 years ago and went to the higher paying job. I have much more responsibility now and a staff to manage, plus I often have to entertain dinner clients, which means I don't get home till 11PM once every 2 weeks or so.

While I don't regret my decision at all career-wise (I have made huge jumps professionally), I do feel that now, my value to the company makes it difficult to "schedule" maternity leave. I wasn't planning on ttc as soon as you are (I wanted to wait a year after I started the new job, ended up waiting 2), but now that I am ttc, I find myself too busy, too tired or too stressed.

I gave up a pretty good job with a huge reputable company, with great benefits and an understanding supervisor for a new much higher paying job at a small boutique firm and more opportunity. I think in the long run, I gave up some of my social freedom to advance my career.

My former VP, on the other hand, stayed at the old company and has had 2 kids in the last 3 years and leaves every day at five.

I think if you are serious about ttc, you should definitely consider what your career goals are and what the corporate culture is in your new job.

I think if you are moving to another big company where there are people who can cover while you are out, you should be fine. But if it is a smaller company and your role is unique or specialized, you may want think it through.

I'm not saying that you won't be able to do it, I'm just saying, from my own personal experience, it is difficult to choose advancing your career over having children and I feel I may have set myself back in having children by choosing to advance my career professionally.

Re: Im so confused!!!!!!!!!!!!

That is a tough decision. I couldn't even begin to give you advice. I will say that I wish you luck in whatever you do and bet you will make the decision that is best for you.

Re: Im so confused!!!!!!!!!!!!

Re: Im so confused!!!!!!!!!!!!

My advice is look out for number one(thats you )