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Your thoughts on this preschool situation

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blu6385

Member since 5/08

8351 total posts

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Your thoughts on this preschool situation

DS turned 3 in november and is in a preschool program. Next year he will be in Prek then the year after that he will be in K.


DS is IMO definitely on the less mature side. I am worried how he will do and have debating about leaving him back however as of now I have decided that he will not be held back.

He daycare/preschool decided in october that there were switching his class to a non pre school room till November when everyone officially turns 3. Of course they were charging more money for this (different topic and big argument I had).

I was not happy with this besides the money issue. IMO I put him in a preschool I get that he is young but it is what it is no matter what as of now he is starting K in two years so my thought is they should be learning what they need to know and not holding him back because that's what they feel though I already made it clear that's not what I want.

I was told January the class will start with work, homework etc. Well I just followed up cause I have seen nothing and asked whats going on and I was told they just started some handwriting program this week (finally).

But the response when I asked was he is still young. (With a gesture of kind like I need to relax). Again my response is young or not he is starting K in two years he needs to start learning it.

My thought is they can't pull this next year if he is going to ever be ready for K.

Am I wrong for thinking they should be trying to teach them everything that other Preschool kid that turned 3 over the summer is learning and thinking they need to stop using the excuse they are young. (I get ultimately I may have to hold him back but right now I don't plan on it).

Its not just him they are singling out its the whole class ... At least that's how they are positioning it to me.

Posted 1/19/17 11:30 AM
 
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mrsrainbow
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Your thoughts on this preschool situation

I dunno...it kinda sounds like you want a regimented school setting and that's not what they do. My DC is 3 and in a preschool program and they have 0 work, 0 homework...they are learning socialization, alphabet, numbers, colors, songs, etc. I wouldn't be happy if they were forcing work that they weren't even ready for. I think your expectation is way off.

Posted 1/19/17 11:35 AM
 

nycgirl
Angels!

Member since 3/09

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Re: Your thoughts on this preschool situation

It's hard to tell based on this info.
Before writing, they should be focusing on sounds.
Some kids with later birthdays don't have the motor skills to do any writing until much later (kindergarten).
I agree w PP, it sounds like you are unhappy. Heck out your other options.

Posted 1/19/17 11:48 AM
 

blu6385

Member since 5/08

8351 total posts

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Re: Your thoughts on this preschool situation

My daughter was in this same school/daycare. And they did all this with her class. Granted she had a later birthday but not everyone in her class did and they still gave all the same work.

I do want a school setting that's what I am paying for. And I have friend who son is in a 3 program and they get homework. All the kids are in a different ages in that program. So school work is definitely the norm. And her class is only a few days a week for an hour and half

I am also not expecting him to be able to do it; he may not have the skill but I do expect them to at least teach them and it see what can be done.

Maybe I am expecting too much but I don't get how they are supposed to learn if they arent even trying to show them.

Message edited 1/19/2017 12:00:23 PM.

Posted 1/19/17 11:56 AM
 

OhBoyorGirl
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Member since 2/12

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Re: Your thoughts on this preschool situation

Posted by mrsrainbow

I dunno...it kinda sounds like you want a regimented school setting and that's not what they do. My DC is 3 and in a preschool program and they have 0 work, 0 homework...they are learning socialization, alphabet, numbers, colors, songs, etc. I wouldn't be happy if they were forcing work that they weren't even ready for. I think your expectation is way off.



I agree completely.

Posted 1/19/17 12:04 PM
 

mrsrainbow
LIF Adult

Member since 1/17

1465 total posts

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Re: Your thoughts on this preschool situation

Posted by blu6385

My daughter was in this same school/daycare. And they did all this with her class. Granted she had a later birthday but not everyone in her class did and they still gave all the same work.

I do want a school setting that's what I am paying for. And I have friend who son is in a 3 program and they get homework. All the kids are in a different ages in that program. So school work is definitely the norm. And her class is only a few days a week for an hour and half

I am also not expecting him to be able to do it; he may not have the skill but I do expect them to at least teach them and it see what can be done.

Maybe I am expecting too much but I don't get how they are supposed to learn if they arent even trying to show them.



So they changed the program since your daughter went? My 3 year old program is in a church - it is a nursery school - so I expect them to do the basics, not actual teaching like a classroom. If you're not happy then I'd switch.

Posted 1/19/17 12:08 PM
 

phoenix913
LIF Adult

Member since 5/05

3034 total posts

Name:
V

Re: Your thoughts on this preschool situation

He has TWO years until kindy! Why is everyone in such a rush? There is no need for a child who just turned 3 to be learning writing.

I have a DS that just turned 3 in October. He's in daycare/preschool 3 days a week. His class is combined 3/4's. They purposely only teach the 4 yo's writing b/c it's not developmentally appropriate for 3's. My older son went through this program as well and went to kindy know everything he needed to know and more.

I think you should relax a little and let him just play and socialize. That's what they need to know at this age.

Posted 1/19/17 12:09 PM
 

blu6385

Member since 5/08

8351 total posts

Name:

Re: Your thoughts on this preschool situation

Posted by mrsrainbow

Posted by blu6385

My daughter was in this same school/daycare. And they did all this with her class. Granted she had a later birthday but not everyone in her class did and they still gave all the same work.

I do want a school setting that's what I am paying for. And I have friend who son is in a 3 program and they get homework. All the kids are in a different ages in that program. So school work is definitely the norm. And her class is only a few days a week for an hour and half

I am also not expecting him to be able to do it; he may not have the skill but I do expect them to at least teach them and it see what can be done.

Maybe I am expecting too much but I don't get how they are supposed to learn if they arent even trying to show them.



So they changed the program since your daughter went? My 3 year old program is in a church - it is a nursery school - so I expect them to do the basics, not actual teaching like a classroom. If you're not happy then I'd switch.



they only changed it for his class. If you were to go in they would explain the same program that has been there. There is another preschool class they are doing the program that I expected. I probably can push to have him in there.

My mindset is give kids the work if they do it great if they can't that's fine. I don't expect them to push it but I do expect them to try.

I do worry about K and I want as much preparation as possbile I rather him be exposed and taught a lot now then have to struggle when he gets there.

Thanks for the opinions I get I am probably expecting to much but I can't help it I just worry about him and already feel he is behind

Posted 1/19/17 12:18 PM
 

blu6385

Member since 5/08

8351 total posts

Name:

Re: Your thoughts on this preschool situation

Posted by phoenix913

He has TWO years until kindy! Why is everyone in such a rush? There is no need for a child who just turned 3 to be learning writing.

I have a DS that just turned 3 in October. He's in daycare/preschool 3 days a week. His class is combined 3/4's. They purposely only teach the 4 yo's writing b/c it's not developmentally appropriate for 3's. My older son went through this program as well and went to kindy know everything he needed to know and more.

I think you should relax a little and let him just play and socialize. That's what they need to know at this age.



its really less than 2 years before he is in K.

And he is there for 8 hours a day and he has plenty of socializing and play time he has been there since 12 weeks so he has that covered. I just expect a school setting for a good portion of that time and I expect them to at least try because in the long run that's what I want.
But I can admit to myself that I may expect too much and what I want is not the best way

Posted 1/19/17 12:23 PM
 

phoenix913
LIF Adult

Member since 5/05

3034 total posts

Name:
V

Re: Your thoughts on this preschool situation

Posted by blu6385

Posted by phoenix913

He has TWO years until kindy! Why is everyone in such a rush? There is no need for a child who just turned 3 to be learning writing.

I have a DS that just turned 3 in October. He's in daycare/preschool 3 days a week. His class is combined 3/4's. They purposely only teach the 4 yo's writing b/c it's not developmentally appropriate for 3's. My older son went through this program as well and went to kindy know everything he needed to know and more.

I think you should relax a little and let him just play and socialize. That's what they need to know at this age.



its really less than 2 years before he is in K.

And he is there for 8 hours a day and he has plenty of socializing and play time he has been there since 12 weeks so he has that covered. I just expect a school setting for a good portion of that time and I expect them to at least try because in the long run that's what I want.
But I can admit to myself that I may expect too much and what I want is not the best way



Like I said, I have a DS the same age, so I understand where you are coming from. But they really do have plenty of time. I would trust the teachers, especially since it seems they've done this program for a while. And if you're not happy, switch. But I really do think you're worrying over nothing and pushing them will only make them unhappy.

Posted 1/19/17 12:35 PM
 

LSP2005
Bunny kisses are so cute!

Member since 5/05

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L

Re: Your thoughts on this preschool situation

If you are not happy with the program, switch schools. I would not expect homework, but would expect drawing shapes, cutting paper, letter and sound recognition, drawing their name, and writing some letters. I would also expect art, free play, songs, religion, manners

My kids learned the above when they were three. They also learned about different people in the community, had a full store for them to learn math, and food groups.

Posted 1/19/17 12:35 PM
 

blu6385

Member since 5/08

8351 total posts

Name:

Re: Your thoughts on this preschool situation

Posted by LSP2005

If you are not happy with the program, switch schools. I would not expect homework, but would expect drawing shapes, cutting paper, letter and sound recognition, drawing their name, and writing some letters. I would also expect art, free play, songs, religion, manners

My kids learned the above when they were three. They also learned about different people in the community, had a full store for them to learn math, and food groups.



This is what I expect also minus the religion only because it's not a religious school. Homework is not really a concern in the long run I rather not have it easier for me Chat Icon
Will see how the next few weeks go before making any decisions thanks everyone

Posted 1/19/17 1:00 PM
 

petvet
LIF Adult

Member since 5/08

1238 total posts

Name:
Meredith

Re: Your thoughts on this preschool situation

Any preschool I have looked at waits till they are 3-4 in September to start more formal education type of preschool. Most real Preschool's are 2 years 3, 4 then kindgergarten. The kids not 3 at the start of the year ( or not going to kindergarten in 2 years ) are in a daycare type program or not eligible yet. Sounds pretty normal to me! If you were going to have him kindgergarten earlier then 5 ( which is the cutoff where I live) then I'd look for another option where you feel he's getting 2 years of a little bit more formal education ( early introduction of course they are still so young)

Message edited 1/19/2017 2:08:58 PM.

Posted 1/19/17 2:06 PM
 

spartagoose
LIF Infant

Member since 8/15

76 total posts

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Re: Your thoughts on this preschool situation

I'd be annoyed too if a program was changed on us without notice -- particularly in October and not at the start of the school year! I agree with many of the other posters about academic work being developmentally inappropriate in early childhood. There is a lot of research out there concluding that having an explicit reading and math curriculum for very young kids (even in kindergarten!) results in worse scores across the board when the kids get to middle school -- it seems to create a distaste for the subject matter that lasts a long time ("I don't understand adding/subtracting now = I am and always will be bad at math") and perhaps a shaky grasp of the fundamentals from the start.

Posted 1/19/17 2:38 PM
 

ml110
LIF Adult

Member since 1/06

5435 total posts

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Your thoughts on this preschool situation

hes a new 3- year old... so i wouldn't be too worried. as long as they're doing SOMETHING with him, and he's not just hanging around all day. my son is also a november baby. he started part time preschool right before he tuned 3. they didn't do anything with writing then- but they did "circle time" to talk about days of the week, shapes, colors, weather, letters and letter sounds... but nothing with writing.
when he was 4 and 5 (pre-k) thats when they started doing more, he came home with really simple books to "read", etc.... BUT i live in NJ and he couldn't start Kindergarten before he was 5. our cut-off is october 1st. SOOO he was almost 6 when he started kindergarten this year. I'm actually REALLY glad he had that extra year and that he's the oldest in his kindergarten class. he's doing REALLY well and was more than ready-- not sure he would have been if he started at not even 5...

Posted 1/19/17 4:27 PM
 

Tiggeruth
I am a mom :-)

Member since 6/06

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Heidi

Re: Your thoughts on this preschool situation

I think you are expecting too much from a 3s program.

DD went through a pre-school and didn't start handwriting seriously until pre-k. In the 3s they did a lot of fine motor stuff to build hand strength for writing but not much writing.

Posted 1/19/17 4:47 PM
 

MrsS2005
Mom of 3

Member since 11/05

13118 total posts

Name:
B

Re: Your thoughts on this preschool situation

I think it's completely absurd to be giving homework to 3 year olds. They're babies and will have plenty of time to get homework as they get older. I would expect some type of learning environment (shapes, colors, letters, sounds and eventually tracing letters), but I don't think it needs to be that rigid. There is still plenty of time before K and even then, kids will be coming in with a huge range of what they know and can do. I found that they really taught the basics for the first half of the year to get all kids caught up. I understand the frustration of changing the program at the last minute, but I wouldn't stress about the timeline.

Posted 1/19/17 4:50 PM
 

Lauren82
LIF Adult

Member since 10/06

4580 total posts

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L

Re: Your thoughts on this preschool situation

My dd is 3 and in a preschool program. They give weekly letter activity homework and do a focus letter of the week. She actually never comes home with work other than scribbled drawings and the projects they do. I wanted it that way, as I don't want her to be doing academic tasks at her age, but you have to be happy with what you are paying for. Maybe it is time to look for a more academic focused environment...it's ok to change if you aren't happy.

Posted 1/19/17 5:07 PM
 

NYCGirl80
I love my kiddies!

Member since 5/11

10413 total posts

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Re: Your thoughts on this preschool situation

DS is in a day care for 11 hours/day. They do all the education in the morning and then the afternoon is lunch, nap, snack and play time.

I'm not sure how much education you're expecting, but you can certainly supplement at home. We do.

Posted 1/20/17 8:55 AM
 

blu6385

Member since 5/08

8351 total posts

Name:

Re: Your thoughts on this preschool situation

Thanks everyone , to make it clear, I am not expecting my child to be able to full blown out write. I am not expecting 8 hours a day of "work".


I don't expect nor really want real homework. The homework was the least of my concerns but they mentioned that in January that they will start the preschool and being sending homework home which I am sure will just be very easy drawing or coloring sheets. The point was since I haven't seen anything I was assuming they haven't started anything and I was right they just started the other day.

I do expect them though to start something. Some kind of writing even if its just writing his name or one or two letters. But really all I want is what the other preschool class is doing his class should be dong also.

And I just personally don't like the excuse he is a young 3 he is going to be a young K he will only be 4 and that will not change right now so I just think everyone even if they just turned 3 or they turned 3 months ago should be learning the same stuff because when they all go K together they will be learning the same thing.

But with all that said I am going to relax a little for the next few weeks and see what they introduce. And also try not to stress and worry that he is behind on things

Posted 1/20/17 9:21 AM
 

EandF
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Member since 11/11

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Re: Your thoughts on this preschool situation

I get your concerns. My DD is 3 1/2 and in a 3s program. We had her parent/teacher conference yesterday. I know they've been working on a letter of the week and tracing their names and lines, in addition to arts and crafts projects, and some other things. DD is supposed to get one homework sheet on Weds that should take no more than five minutes, but I haven't seen one in a while.

I was actually pleasantly surprised at how much they are doing. The teacher did an evaluation of each student. It included things like letter and number recognition, recognizing shapes, following basic directions like naming the shape, coloring it in and naming the color, also gross and fine motor skill activities like hopping on one foot, stringing beads together, cutting with scissors, etc.

The teacher absolutely stressed that this year was about social, NOT academic, performance. Listening, getting along with others, playing. She told me in a class of 17, only two can write their names. Mine is not one of them! Chat Icon She told us DD's strengths and her weaknesses if we wanted to work on them with her.

I would just keep an eye on what are they doing. Did they ever tell you why they changed your son's class but not the other one?

Posted 1/20/17 9:48 AM
 

lululu
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Re: Your thoughts on this preschool situation

Just on the handwriting, there are a lot of different schools of thought on when it is appropriate to teach handwriting. I actually would not like a program that taught handwriting that early. There are other things they can do to develop fine motor skills that will prepare them to learn to write at a more developmentally appropriate age.

Posted 1/20/17 11:32 AM
 

ml110
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Re: Your thoughts on this preschool situation

Posted

And I just personally don't like the excuse he is a young 3 he is going to be a young K he will only be 4 and that will not change right now so I just think everyone even if they just turned 3 or they turned 3 months ago should be learning the same stuff because when they all go K together they will be learning the same thing.

But with all that said I am going to relax a little for the next few weeks and see what they introduce. And also try not to stress and worry that he is behind on things



Does the preschool know that you're not keeping him back for K? They may be assuming Bc of if when his bday is, that you're holding him back and that he still has an extras Year. Maybe if you tell them, they'll move him up so he'll be on track with the kids he's starting K with.
I would still think about giving him that extra year though. I'm a speech therapist and a boy mom lol and they just develop slower than the girls, and really do benefit from being the oldest father than youngest....

Message edited 1/20/2017 12:36:35 PM.

Posted 1/20/17 12:35 PM
 

VickiC
Rocking the party

Member since 5/05

4937 total posts

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Vicki

Re: Your thoughts on this preschool situation

Posted by Tiggeruth

I think you are expecting too much from a 3s program.

DD went through a pre-school and didn't start handwriting seriously until pre-k. In the 3s they did a lot of fine motor stuff to build hand strength for writing but not much writing.



Agreed. It's not appropriate to start writing in the 3's program. My friends who are OT's become upset when they hear of 3s classes learning to write. Coloring is appropriate bc it promotes proper hand strength and crayon positioning to get them to hold a pencil correctly. My DS did not do writing in his 3s program at all. They started writing in his Pre-K class.

My son also has a late birthday and we decided to hold him back a year. He was not ready at all for kindergarten socially or with his handwriting. He is a lefty, which he didn't decide on until he was well into his 4's Pre-K program, which also inhibited his hand strength. He needed an OT's help and then did an extra year of Pre-K at a different school that offered cooking/science classes 2 afternoons a week. He flourished, and this year in Kindergarten has been outstanding. He went into Kindy reading and is reading at an H level at the moment.

Posted 1/20/17 12:50 PM
 

Lauren82
LIF Adult

Member since 10/06

4580 total posts

Name:
L

Re: Your thoughts on this preschool situation

Posted by lululu

Just on the handwriting, there are a lot of different schools of thought on when it is appropriate to teach handwriting. I actually would not like a program that taught handwriting that early. There are other things they can do to develop fine motor skills that will prepare them to learn to write at a more developmentally appropriate age.



I totally agree.

Posted 1/20/17 5:59 PM
 
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