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fdnywife
Mommy of 3 and 4 rescues
Member since 9/09 1841 total posts
Name:
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WHICH HOUSE :( Shoreham or Sayville
O.k. seriously. The stress is KILLING me. I was supposed to sign contracts for a house on Wednesday, but had topush it back b/c of the Rescue Me party. It was then Thursday and then the lawyer had to call and change the date to this upcoming Monday. I just keep thinking... is this a sign? LOL The housekeeper from Goonies keeps coming into my mind LMAO
http://youtu.be/VBGVHQaQ3Pw
As some of you know its not just buying a house, but my relationship with DH. Its all so hard! We got to a point where we thought I would buy a house and he would put his up for sale, which we know would take a while. He will live in his while I move with the kids to the new one. During that time we would go to couples counseling to decide which direction we then want to go. If things work out well he would move in with us when his house sells. The kids would honestly know NO different. For real. His schedule is SO crazy with the FDNY that he is almost always not home for dinner, comes home around their bedtime (gets off the 6:00 p.m. shift) or has already left for work by the time they wake up (leaves around 5:30 a.m.)
So anyway... My hearts sad, breaking, but has hope. With all that aside... pick the house you would want to live in please, just based on the home descriptions.
House #1 Shoreham Ranch on cement slab.
35 minutes from work for me to Sayville on the best days. DH has to go to Brooklyn.
Half acre, culdesac, FP, CAC, IGS, 2 car detached garage, 20x40 IG pool, 3 bed, 2 bath but a small open floor plan. Incredible neighbors. Roof needs to be completely ripped up including the wood. Just put up all new fences including around the pool (paid off)
Negatives are - further from work, little living space. All winter we feel on top of each other with no escape.
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House #2 Sayville Colonial with full basement
5 minutes from work for me to Sayville. DH closer to Brooklyn. Move in ready, 1/3 acre 3 bed 1.5 bath. Also Studio apartment with full bath, so we could make it a 4 bed/2.5 bath or rent it out for extra cash. Bedrooms are all upstairs which I like. More living space. Can finish the basement for even more space. $50k less than our home now.
Negatives are - we gain lots of space and so much potential but lose all the extras - the big detached garage, pool, CAC, IGS, smaller yard, culdesac, FP and awesome incredible neighbors. (I dont know the Sayville ones yet)
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Posted 9/10/11 8:51 AM  |
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JennZ
MY LIFE!!
Member since 8/05 25463 total posts
Name:
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Re: WHICH HOUSE :( Shoreham or Sayville
I vote Sayville. My family has been there for about 50 years. Better schools, main street, over all IMO better location. Will have a better resale as LOCATION! LOCATION! LOCATION is a HUGE selling point for many people. When we are done in this house, our plan is Sayville or Bayport. I want one of the Colonials on candee ave. 
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| Posted 9/10/11 9:53 AM |
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REKoz412
LIF Infant
Member since 5/10 148 total posts
Name:
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Re: WHICH HOUSE :( Shoreham or Sayville
Well, I'll chime in first. I'm not a regular poster but, well take it for what it's worth. First off....AWWKK! You have a very tough decision, I don't envy you.
Since I live a town over from Shoreham, that was my first vote. Since you mentioned the great neighbors, I'm wondering if that's where you are now? If so, then I think you'd probably go in that direction since it's what you know.
However, I've heard such great things about Sayville. Only been there once but loved the town. I've lived in a few different states and the one thing I always missed was a "Main Street" type of town. That's what I grew up with. Now my kids are grown so the fact that I don't have that here is not as big an issue for me. Still a huge plus though. Because of that, I am still deeply connected to my hs friends and we are all so grateful for our experiences growing up where we did. None of my friends have that same connection. Maybe it was the times, but that small town thing is something I really wish I could have given my kids.
I'm pretty sure I know the area of Shoreham you are talking about. My friend lives in a ranch there that was expanded and has a family room off the kitchen. Her daughter lives next door and they built up and out and have an absolutely amazing home. There are so many options with those houses and I love the big wide tree lined streets. Loads of kids play together outside like the "olden" days.
Then there is the North Shore, South Shore thing. I only know the No. and I personally like the feel better..at least in Nassau...seems slower, less crowded, less city like in Suffolk. I love the trees and hills in both counties on the No. shore.
So, there's a few factors for ya in case you haven't considered them. Assuming you have no present connection is Shoreham (that's the big ticket IMO), with small kids, I think I'd go with Sayville. The commute alone is worth it. And then you are right there when the kids need to be picked up (sick etc) from school. You're also more available to be more involved in their activities in all ways, not just transportation. If it turns out that you are on your own, I think this would make your life easier.
I don't think you can go wrong either way. But working 5 minutes from home when you have kids is HUGE.
Good luck...can't wait to find out what happens.
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| Posted 9/10/11 10:03 AM |
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2boys4me
He's coming soon!
Member since 4/10 4260 total posts
Name:
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Re: WHICH HOUSE :( Shoreham or Sayville
I love Sayville. It's one of my favorite towns on the Island.
As for Shoreham, I'm sure you know better than me because you live there but my sisters husband has 2 younger brothers, one in the middle school and one in the high school. The one in the high school is big into drugs. My BIL says that drugs and drinking are big there, as in a lot of high schools but he said even more so there because there is nothing to do out there so everyone just parties. He had some issues himself before my sister said straighten up or get out. But like people said in my "bad" school district thread, it's how you raise your kids, not the district and those things can happen anywhere.
Based on the houses alone, I'd pick Sayville. Yah, you're losing some things but space is really important.
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| Posted 9/10/11 10:06 AM |
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JennZ
MY LIFE!!
Member since 8/05 25463 total posts
Name:
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Re: WHICH HOUSE :( Shoreham or Sayville
Posted by 2boys4me
I love Sayville. It's one of my favorite towns on the Island.
As for Shoreham, I'm sure you know better than me because you live there but my sisters husband has 2 younger brothers, one in the middle school and one in the high school. The one in the high school is big into drugs. My BIL says that drugs and drinking are big there, as in a lot of high schools but he said even more so there because there is nothing to do out there so everyone just parties. He had some issues himself before my sister said straighten up or get out. But like people said in my "bad" school district thread, it's how you raise your kids, not the district and those things can happen anywhere.
Based on the houses alone, I'd pick Sayville. Yah, you're losing some things but space is really important.
I love Sayville, but trust me when I tell you they are drinking and partying there too. Its not just weed either. As they do in MOST districts. I went to Bayport, and we would party near the drug free school zone sign.
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| Posted 9/10/11 10:28 AM |
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2boys4me
He's coming soon!
Member since 4/10 4260 total posts
Name:
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Re: WHICH HOUSE :( Shoreham or Sayville
Posted by JennZ
Posted by 2boys4me
I love Sayville. It's one of my favorite towns on the Island.
As for Shoreham, I'm sure you know better than me because you live there but my sisters husband has 2 younger brothers, one in the middle school and one in the high school. The one in the high school is big into drugs. My BIL says that drugs and drinking are big there, as in a lot of high schools but he said even more so there because there is nothing to do out there so everyone just parties. He had some issues himself before my sister said straighten up or get out. But like people said in my "bad" school district thread, it's how you raise your kids, not the district and those things can happen anywhere.
Based on the houses alone, I'd pick Sayville. Yah, you're losing some things but space is really important.
I love Sayville, but trust me when I tell you they are drinking and partying there too. Its not just weed either. As they do in MOST districts. I went to Bayport, and we would party near the drug free school zone sign.
Yah, I know. I went to Massapequa and there was a huge heroin problem, people just hide that stuff well to make their town and district look amazing.
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| Posted 9/10/11 10:40 AM |
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Sweetlax22
LIF Adult
Member since 5/10 1904 total posts
Name:
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Re: WHICH HOUSE :( Shoreham or Sayville
Sayville - just make sure carrying the cost of two houses does not put even more stress on your relationship.
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| Posted 9/10/11 10:42 AM |
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fdnywife
Mommy of 3 and 4 rescues
Member since 9/09 1841 total posts
Name:
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Re: WHICH HOUSE :( Shoreham or Sayville
Posted by JennZ
Posted by 2boys4me
I love Sayville. It's one of my favorite towns on the Island.
As for Shoreham, I'm sure you know better than me because you live there but my sisters husband has 2 younger brothers, one in the middle school and one in the high school. The one in the high school is big into drugs. My BIL says that drugs and drinking are big there, as in a lot of high schools but he said even more so there because there is nothing to do out there so everyone just parties. He had some issues himself before my sister said straighten up or get out. But like people said in my "bad" school district thread, it's how you raise your kids, not the district and those things can happen anywhere.
Based on the houses alone, I'd pick Sayville. Yah, you're losing some things but space is really important.
I love Sayville, but trust me when I tell you they are drinking and partying there too. Its not just weed either. As they do in MOST districts. I went to Bayport, and we would party near the drug free school zone sign.
Yeah, there are drugs everywhere from the ghetto to Catholic schools so Im not really concerned about that. As for Shorehams kids maybe doing drugs b/c theres not much to do here - IMO theres the same amount of things to do here than anywhere else. Its not like the Boonies LOL Thanks for all the advice. It makes me feel better that you're alost all pointing towards Sayville because thats the way Im leaning. Just in terms of the house I will be giving up a lot of beautiful and convenient extras but over time I can have that again. I just need to build it. The only thing I can never get back is the yard size and the culdesac, but the home in Sayville is 3 houses down from enormous soccer fields too. Plenty of room to ride bikes, fly kites etc.
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| Posted 9/10/11 10:49 AM |
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missfabulous
#mommyneedswine
Member since 6/09 10031 total posts
Name:
Colleen
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Re: WHICH HOUSE :( Shoreham or Sayville
Living in Nassau I don't know either area. However, I voted for Sayville because:
-neighbors being great is a good thing- but neighbors change.
-proximity to work is a huge bonus and saves you on gas
-you can never have too much space
-being able to rent out is a huge bonus
-with the land you have, you can always put in an IGP (use the money from renting, or the 50k you would save)
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| Posted 9/10/11 10:53 AM |
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fdnywife
Mommy of 3 and 4 rescues
Member since 9/09 1841 total posts
Name:
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Re: WHICH HOUSE :( Shoreham or Sayville
Posted by missfabulous
Living in Nassau I don't know either area. However, I voted for Sayville because:
-neighbors being great is a good thing- but neighbors change.
-proximity to work is a huge bonus and saves you on gas
-you can never have too much space
-being able to rent out is a huge bonus
-with the land you have, you can always put in an IGP (use the money from renting, or the 50k you would save)
Very good points. I never really thought about the $ saved in gas and I have a v8 4 wheel drive! it would be so nice to not have to fill up every 3 days!
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| Posted 9/10/11 10:54 AM |
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GoldenRod
10 years on LIF!
Member since 11/06 26792 total posts
Name:
Shawn
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Re: WHICH HOUSE :( Shoreham or Sayville
Redoing an entire roof is $$$, and very disruptive, so that's a huge negative in my mind. I voted for the bigger house and shorter commute.
As any of us who have owned a house for a while can tell you, don't buy a house for the current neighbors.... they can move... If you buy a house primarily for the great neighbors, and several of them move out and terrible ones move in, then you have a lesser house with bad neighbors.
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| Posted 9/10/11 11:48 AM |
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rojerono
Happiest.
Member since 8/06 13803 total posts
Name:
Jeannie
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Re: WHICH HOUSE :( Shoreham or Sayville
I live in Sayville and love it (I actually think you had Robbie when he was in Kindergarten). As you know from working here, a HUGE portion of the residents are teachers or police and fireman. I think you would fit right in with the neighbors with no problems. The fact that you get more house and a shorter commute is icing. Yeah.. you will lose the IGP.. but pools are a pain and you have beaches everywhere - not to mention Byron Lake is a hop, skip and jump if you really crave the non-salt experience. You know how great the school district is and how awesome downtown is so I won't sell you on that.. but what I will say is that maybe a new house that is not 'his' but can be 'yours' as a family might help the situation. Anyway yeah.. that's my vote.
Message edited 9/10/2011 7:18:26 PM.
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| Posted 9/10/11 7:07 PM |
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Jan1975
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Member since 8/09 3846 total posts
Name:
Sarah
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Re: WHICH HOUSE :( Shoreham or Sayville
Being close to work when you have children is priceless. Trust me, I am far. The basement space would seal the deal for me. I woudln't consider buying a house without a basement.
Also, in light of the current situation with your DH, I feel as if shortening his commute could lessen the stress on your marriage.
Plus, Sayville is a beautiful town and has good schools. Good luck
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| Posted 9/10/11 8:04 PM |
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Mrs213
????????
Member since 2/09 18986 total posts
Name:
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Re: WHICH HOUSE :( Shoreham or Sayville
I like sayville better than shoreham
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| Posted 9/10/11 9:26 PM |
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schmora15
LIF Adult
Member since 9/08 2476 total posts
Name:
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Re: WHICH HOUSE :( Shoreham or Sayville
Sayville!! Cute town! Plus the commute from shoreham to Brooklyn will be awful even if its not ur typical hrs. My bilmdoes Holbrook to Brooklyn and its gotten very old after 4 yrs.
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| Posted 9/10/11 9:27 PM |
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KLSbear
LIF Adult
Member since 1/06 1908 total posts
Name:
Karen
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Re: WHICH HOUSE :( Shoreham or Sayville
I vote for Sayville too. I can vouch for great neighbors, we're near the soccer fields too. You may lose the pool but there is a nice beach & marina with tennis courts and a playground for Islip town residents, the town has a lot of community events too. The commute for DH would be relatively easy - the parking at Sayville train station is easy or he can drive a short way to Ronkonkoma and get an express train. As mentioned, lots of FDNY families in the area too.
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| Posted 9/11/11 9:30 AM |
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fdnywife
Mommy of 3 and 4 rescues
Member since 9/09 1841 total posts
Name:
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Re: WHICH HOUSE :( Shoreham or Sayville
Posted by KLSbear
I can vouch for great neighbors, we're near the soccer fields too.
This home is on Durham, so its Connetquot schools. I think its right on the border line. I think thats sort of a negative b/c a lot of the neighbor friends might be in a different school district? What do you think.
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| Posted 9/11/11 10:19 AM |
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rojerono
Happiest.
Member since 8/06 13803 total posts
Name:
Jeannie
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Re: WHICH HOUSE :( Shoreham or Sayville
Posted by fdnywife
This home is on Durham, so its Connetquot schools. I think its right on the border line. I think thats sort of a negative b/c a lot of the neighbor friends might be in a different school district? What do you think.
Most of the folks near you will be going to Connequot too.. and you'll probably collect a lot of friends from the district just by doing parent stuff so I wouldn't worry about that. It might actually be a benefit not to have your kids go to the district where you teach!
Message edited 9/11/2011 2:06:37 PM.
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| Posted 9/11/11 2:06 PM |
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fdnywife
Mommy of 3 and 4 rescues
Member since 9/09 1841 total posts
Name:
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Re: WHICH HOUSE :( Shoreham or Sayville
Posted by rojerono
It might actually be a benefit not to have your kids go to the district where you teach!
Ummmmm... YEAH!  As you may know my older son has a lot of behavioral and social issues. I was pretty concerned about him having an issue with a neighbors child and also having that child be my student! LOL So it is a good thing that were going to be in Connetquot. Its just going to be hard to start all over again, but you do what you gotta do... right?
Message edited 9/11/2011 2:37:13 PM.
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| Posted 9/11/11 2:35 PM |
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SummerMom
Now a mom of 2!
Member since 6/07 4970 total posts
Name:
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Re: WHICH HOUSE :( Shoreham or Sayville
Location, location, location. Sayville.
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| Posted 9/11/11 8:05 PM |
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KLSbear
LIF Adult
Member since 1/06 1908 total posts
Name:
Karen
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Re: WHICH HOUSE :( Shoreham or Sayville
Posted by fdnywife
Posted by KLSbear
I can vouch for great neighbors, we're near the soccer fields too.
This home is on Durham, so its Connetquot schools. I think its right on the border line. I think thats sort of a negative b/c a lot of the neighbor friends might be in a different school district? What do you think.
A former co-worker lived on Durham. The soccer fields were her families farm - she grew up in a house that used to be in the middle of those fields. She lived over on Durham for several years after she was married and only moved when she retired in her 60's and moved to a condo where it was less work to maintain. I agree with what others have said, if you're teacing in Sayville it may be good that your children are in another district. The elementary school is not far away, it's just up Terry road off Bourne. I'm not sure where the dividing line is but I would think they'll have a lot of school friends that live nearby. We're up near Sunrise and our neighbor's children go to Connetquot schools.
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| Posted 9/11/11 8:50 PM |
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MrsSpring
I'm a lucky mama
Member since 1/10 7585 total posts
Name:
L
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Re: WHICH HOUSE :( Shoreham or Sayville
My votes Sayville.
I live a town over and just love the town. its so perfect.
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| Posted 9/12/11 9:52 AM |
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twiceasnice
LIF Adult
Member since 2/08 1126 total posts
Name:
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Re: WHICH HOUSE :( Shoreham or Sayville
Sayville!!
1. Closer to your home/school when at work.
2. The ammenities can be added later (CAC, pool) maybe not the 2 car garage.
3. Having the potential to rent is a huge plus if you need future income.
4. The $50,000 savings is great bonus.
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| Posted 9/12/11 1:20 PM |
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fdnywife
Mommy of 3 and 4 rescues
Member since 9/09 1841 total posts
Name:
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Re: WHICH HOUSE :( Shoreham or Sayville
Well I signed the contract today. Well see what happens.
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| Posted 9/12/11 7:50 PM |
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Re: WHICH HOUSE :( Shoreham or Sayville
Posted by fdnywife
Well I signed the contract today. Well see what happens.
Best of luck to you
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| Posted 9/13/11 2:36 PM |
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