What would you have done???(long)

DH and I went to Baskin Robbins tonight to take advantage of 2fer Tuesdays(pigs that we are).... as we get out of the car, a man approaches us, tells us his car broke down, can we please help him and his wife out by giving them some money for the bus so they can get home.....DH(who is usually the biggest pushover) says "sorry, can't help you" I was shocked he did't offer to help.....so we continue inside and I tell him how shocked I was..... he said I was being naive, that the guy was scamming us.....now we walk into the store and at the bottom of my feet is a $10 bill.......someone must have dropped.....so I'm like, I think we should give it to them, now it's not costing us anything.....DH still didn't want to help them.... he said they needed the money for drugs or alcohol.. I just didn't see it that way... I thought about if I was stuck somewhere, I would want someone to help me out(I always forget my cell, so who knows) but he kept insisting that I'm naive and always believe what people tell me......so we wound up doing nothing and left.... I'm just not feeling good about myself right now... esp. since I feel like the reason I found that money was to pass it on....... What would you have done?? Do you think I'm being naive? and even if you thought the person may have been lying would you have given them a few bucks anyway?

Re: What would you have done???(long)

I am a sucker...if I didn't give him the money the first time, I would have given him the money I found at my feet. I've done it before, and I will do it again. It's a gage too though...working in NYC, I feel affinity for some rather than others (i.e. I almost always give to people that sing on the subways)

Re: What would you have done???(long)

Message edited 11/10/2011 2:57:30 PM.

Re: What would you have done???(long)

okay now this is a tough one because what are the chances that this guy didn't have a few bucks lying around in his car or his wife's pocketbook? spare change on the floor even. i probably would have given him the money i found on the floor but i would have definitely been skeptical about it. its something you're never going to know the truth about so just enjoy your ice cream

Re: What would you have done???(long)

I have a big heart and will definitely help someone out in need, but not if they're asking me for money on the street. Sorry, there's lots of other ways for adults to figure out how to get home if you ask me. Sounds like a scam.

Re: What would you have done???(long)

Re: What would you have done???(long)

I have to agree with your dh also. I had a woman come up to me in the grocery store parking lot when I was done shopping asking if I had $1 for gas as she ran out. Can you imagine if she was there for a couple of hours how much she would have made?
Then I had a woman and her kids ask me if I had a cellphone to call her dh. I said no and then had to try and explain to my dd why I did not give her mine.
It's very sad but we live in a world with some sick people and you just can not be naive anymore.
I am the type of person who puts myself in everyone's shoes so I know exactly where you are coming from too.

Re: What would you have done???(long)

were you able to see this so called family and their broken down car anywhere nearby????

Message edited 7/13/2009 2:34:42 PM.

Re: What would you have done???(long)

i laways think to myself " pay it forward" esp if I found $10.... if you are good to someone in need -- ti will come abck to you--- and even if its only $10-- god knows they needed it more than you did

Re: What would you have done???(long)

Re: What would you have done???(long)

I tend to be skeptical like your DH....and have heard TOO many stories of people scamming like that for $$$$.

I would not have given my own $$ to them.

But I would have, like you wanted to do.......probably passed on the found $$ to them.

Don't feel guilty though....they will find a way home!

Re: What would you have done???(long)

I am sorry but I have to agree with you DH.
I use to work in the city and a guy came up to me once saying his car broke down and he needed money to take the bus to see his daughter and wife ect......well I felt bad and gave him $5 to take the bus.
Fast foward 2 weeks, same man with the same exact story!!!!I felt like a total sucker!!!!!!!
I very rarely give money anymore.

Re: What would you have done???(long)

I wouldnt have given them $$... what are the odds in 2007 that they didnt have a cell phone to call a family member??? Or I'm sure if it was truly an emergency any store they may have went into would possibly allow them to use the phone.

Sounds fishy to me... I dont even give money to the kids that stand outside stores with those candy bars anymore.. for all i know they bought the box at BJ's and are trying to double their money from naive shoppers.

I just say.. "sorry, I dont carry cash."

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My brother was scammed out of $40 when some guy in a suit gave him the my car broke down story. He promised he would call the next day and send him a check. My brother gave him the money with the *hope* that he was doing something good and not getting scammed. Well, he learned his lesson and so did my DH. He got approached by the same guy a couple months later and said NO.

Re: What would you have done???(long)

I wouldn't have given them the money either...

My dh was working in a store in Hempstead and this man came in asking him for money claiming that his car broke down and that his wife was in labor. My dh told him sorry and sent him on his way.
A YEAR later he came in to the very same store and started out with the same story when all of a sudden my dh stopped him and said..wait a minute...isn't your wife in labor and you're stuck? Yeah, I remember how this story goes. Next time you should try changing the story if you think you want to scam people.
I don't trust anyone.

Re: What would you have done???(long)

scam

Re: What would you have done???(long)

Scam or not, I always give a buck or two. A buck or two isn't going to make or break me and could potentiially help them if they are in real trouble. It's easy to become cynical in this world but I am trying not to let that happen.
If you don't believe someone, quiz them and see if they think on thier feet fast or stumble on thier words. You can ask
What buz number, where is it picking you up, where is your car, did you call a tow comany/which one etc etc
Either they are good liars or you really help someone.

Re: What would you have done???(long)

im the type of person that i KNOW it could very well be a scam and the odds are high BUT i feel that when we are put into a position to help someone else and do a good deed then i do it i DONT think to myself i wonder if he/she is using that help for good or bad, thats not the point the point is u were trying to help someone else, u were trying to be a better person....and if they were high or drunk from that money so be it thats their bad choices BUT U in the end made a good choice to help another.....btw dh is the same way every time i try to give change to someone asking for money he tells meim naive oh well

Re: What would you have done???(long)

I don't think I would have given money either.
Like one of the above posters asked..Did you see the broke down car?

I was almost scammed with the "I ran out of gas" story as I exited stop and shop. Told the guy "Sorry, all my money just went to these groceries". I felt kind of bad until I got home and someone started a post with the SAME story a few hours before!
So, I give no money, to no one!
And Ummm...Im sure they could have used a local ATM or found a quarter to make a call.

Re: What would you have done???(long)

scam. i've had it happen to me more times than i can count.

there was one woman in particular who in penn station would give me the same song and dance every day.

if you are in a train station and someone asks you for money for fare, it's a scam. the police/rail road will take care of you if you had a real problem (lost wallet, etc.).

the upside is that you have a big heart --- and your intentions were right, you wanted to help. but i agree with your DH.

Re: What would you have done???(long)

scam - i fell for it when i went to cvs, i had a guy and a "broken" car in the parking lot. i felt bad, gave him 5.00 and went inside - i came out, he was gone and a homeless person asked me for money saying that the other guy does that all the time and he (the 2nd guy) was at least honest w/me. i felt like a jerk, i gave him 2.00 but learned my lesson.

sad world

Re: What would you have done???(long)

Scam!
I never give people money. Ever. I'm all about "Paying it forward" so I give to real charities, not people off the street who approach me. Since I work in NYC, I see this all the time. I say most of these people probably make more money than I do. I see the same people on the same days in the same spots.

If his car broke down, I would have told him to go to one of the stores and ask to call someone to have them come pick them up. Dollars to donuts, he would have turned around and walked away.

Re: What would you have done???(long)

I would have given the found money!

Re: What would you have done???(long)

I would never give away my money but if I found it on the floor, why not.