What would it take for you to move out of state?

Dh bought up moving to Raleigh and we he wants me to seriously consider as long as he can find a job of comparable salary. My job is portable so my job isn't a concern. We are planning on house hunting in the next 2 to 3 years and he bought up the difference of housing prices, quality of life, cost of living, etc.

My biggest issue is All my friends and family are here. I've lived in different states in for college and early 20s and always came back due to family.

What would it take for you to move out of state?

DH works in a specialized field. He was laid off last June and has been freelancing since. I have my teaching degree, so I can go pretty much anywhere, but salaries for teachers in other places are not like here. For a good salary, he needs to work in a major city.

DS has social speech delay, so we need an area with services for him.

We're in the beginning stages of looking at Nashville. My cousin and his family get moved every time he is promoted, and he said out of all of the places he's lived, if he had the choice, he would move back to TN.

Re: What would it take for you to move out of state?

Didnt take alot for me to move lol. BUT i was able to become a sahm , moved to one of my dream places, live in a big house with a lot of acres, my kids go to great schools. Yes i miss my friends and family but they come to visit and we talk all the time. I did what was best for me and MY family. Best decision ever.

Re: What would it take for you to move out of state?

Re: What would it take for you to move out of state?

What would it take for you to move out of state?

I'd pick up and move tomorrow... We have actually been discussion going to sc... As long as my dh can get a fairly decent job down there, I'm gone! Gorgeous homes, super low taxes. I keep asking myself what the hell am I doing on li ? As for friends, dh and I are pretty social. My dd makes friends anywhere she goes. We have very little family around. I'd have no trouble leaving.

What would it take for you to move out of state?

I've done it multiple times since being married (Atlanta, Seattle, Durham NC and now LI). Moving out of state isn't something that stops us (although I've never seen so much red tape for every aspect of living - car tags, house buying, etc, than we've experienced in NY). Now that we've zig zagged across the country, the thing I look for in a forever home is: weather (winters here are too rough for me), things to do (in the area and within driving distance), and feel of the community (LI is too conservative for us). I had a hard time in Seattle being 3 time zones away from family (even though we see each other the same number of times - I found time zones a big issue).

I'm also introverted so it's difficult for me to keep making and losing friends. It's definitely easier when I find my community - we're not religious so it has to be in other ways. I'm older than most moms of DS' age (I had him when I was 38) so I haven't been successful meeting mom friends in 2 places I've lived, so I know it's got to be something else that interests me.

What would it take for you to move out of state?

For me- as long as my parents moved with us and I had the financial means to come to NY for visits when I pleased I would go anywhere. We've spoke to my parents many times about moving oos. They can sell their house in about 8 years. Early retirement for my mom will be 11 years and my dad just saves on his own since he works for a small company. They will live with us anyway. We plan to stay for 10 years max. We bought a house here rather than oos now because I can't leave my parents. When they can go, we will. It would have to be a place where DH especially got a good job be liked and we lived more comfortable then now.

Message edited 5/15/2016 9:27:57 PM.

Re: What would it take for you to move out of state?

Love, literally. Cheesy, yes. But that's what I did. Meet my dh ( then bf) thru friends, but he lived in NJ, I lived in long island NY. Instead of doing the long distance thing I just up and left, moved to NJ. Lifes never been better.

Re: What would it take for you to move out of state?

My parents would have to be on board to move with us, and I'd have to be done having children (my embryos and doctor are here )

Re: What would it take for you to move out of state?

DH and DS' well being. I keep asking DH to move out of NYS for years. We would be happier with less financial stress. DH and I are both in a field where we can easily find new jobs.

Re: What would it take for you to move out of state?

If my parents would move than I'd go. Dh has an open offer to move to Dallas and we strongly consider it but not until my dad retires in 3 more years.

Re: What would it take for you to move out of state?

I honestly don't think I would. At least not while my kids are young. I have such a huge support of friends and family here, I can't imagine being away from them. I know that I could make new friends and I know for sure my kids could, but it would never be the same.

Re: What would it take for you to move out of state?

At a minimum my parents and siblings would all have to come with me but even so, I don't think I would leave NY. We have given a lot of thought to this. There's no place like NY. Yes, it's super expensive, traffic is horrible, and winter is 9 months long. However New Yorkers are a different breed - I couldn't handle a slower pace (but I know some people like that) and I am not ready to give up great restaurants and fresh edible bagels, pizza, etc. We have the luxury of living in the suburbs with the ability to be in the greatest city in the world in an hour, with all the culture, activities, attractions and everything else that comes with it. Plus, even some of the lower rated school districts here are way better than many school districts in other states. Could we get a bigger house for less money? Sure, but we would be making a lot less money (at least in our fields) and would be starting all over making friends and once the novelty of warmer weather wore off, I'd be counting the days until we could visit NY. :)

Re: What would it take for you to move out of state?

we are planning our escape. dh retires in 6 years and we plan to move to FL. All our family is here but it's not stopping us. They can take a 3h plane ride or vice versa.

What would it take for you to move out of state?

For DH to be able to get a job he loves with a salary to match. Im ready to go. I love LI and am heart broken that it is such a struggle just to get by month to month. DH and I really don't have much family, those we do have are living their lives, as they should, so we really don't see them as it is.

What would it take for you to move out of state?

I honestly don't think I could move. I'm super close to my family and I love being able to stop by my sister's to hang out. Don't get me wrong long island process are insane! We are having to chose our family size based on the fact that we can't fit 3 kids in ours and taxes would become too high if we dormer.

Re: What would it take for you to move out of state?

Retirement.
DH is already retired and we talk about moving to South Carolina. Cost of living is a huge factor, it's just too costly to stay in NY.
We don't have children, I have one sister and her family, DH has no siblings so we can focus on just us when it comes to relocating.

Re: What would it take for you to move out of state?

Retirement as well.
We love being in Queens and don't see ourselves going anywhere until we are older and would prefer a warmer climate.
My immediate family moved OOS a long time ago and I remained here. DH's parents live in another country. So that's not something holding us here.
We simply love being in Queens and having everything within a reasonable distance: Manhattan, airports, good food, shopping, Coney Island, music and theatre venues, hiking, Central Park...and on and on.

Re: What would it take for you to move out of state?

I bought my house right before the housing market crash SO we're finally at break even, however, IF I had some equity and DH could find a great engineering job (luckily he would get his NY salary most anywhere) I'd leave. I'd miss friends and family but I'd be okay leaving the island.

Re: What would it take for you to move out of state?

If I was making NY money in another state it would be a no brainer... I know many people who can WFH at the same salary so it makes sense to move where the cost of living is cheaper.

What would it take for you to move out of state?

DH is 5 years away from retirement. At that point though - it would be hard for our kids to relocate.

I would think our families would come with us (just our parents).

I have friends who live in other areas of the country and they have so much more bang for their buck and their kids go to great schools. I would be sad to leave but, wouldn't hesitate for a better quality of life.

Re: What would it take for you to move out of state?

I'm of the "never-say-never" mindset, but I don't see myself ever leaving Long Island. I think of myself as an extremely social person, and I cannot imagine ever leaving my family and friends; the vast majority of them are here.

What would it take for you to move out of state?

When I met DH, his plan had been to be moving off LI this year - now that his youngest is leaving to go to college. DH is retired and could live much more comfortably off his pension somewhere else - we both could, actually. If we moved, I wouldn't have to work, or could work PT (I can also receive healthcare though his benefits). But, if he were to pass away, his pension ends and then I'd be stuck - I have to be licensed to work, and only certain states accept my NY license. I started a job 1 1/2 years ago that I will be fully vested in health benefits etc after 10 years, so at that point, maybe I'll consider it. But I would still have a hard time moving away from family - but a lot could change in 8 years, so we'll see. Plus, even though it is expensive here, I really love so much about living on LI - I love the beaches and being close to the City and pretty much anything you could want is right in our backyards. For me to move somewhere it has to have a better (at least somewhat warmer) climate than NY and be no more than 1 hour from the ocean - those are my "must haves."

Message edited 5/16/2016 9:34:15 AM.

Re: What would it take for you to move out of state?

Unfortunately I share joint physical custody with my ExH for my DS, so unless I want to give up my custody and only see DS every other weekend (or really less because of convenience) I couldn't move. But if it weren't for that situation, DH and I would have moved OOS a long time ago. We talked about the Carolinas, Virginia (right outside of DC) and/or the possibility of upstate NY.