Was/is your shower a surprise?

I'm not really into surprises and my Mom really wants my shower to be a surprise. My thing is that I want to be prepared and look as good as I can because that's when I feel my very best and I'm most comfortable. I've asked her if I could just know that date but no details and I even told her that they could blindfold me so I don't know where I'm going! She seems very disappointed and the last thing I want to do is hurt her feelings.

Re: Was/is your shower a surprise?

Mine is not but I would have been ok if it was.

Re: Was/is your shower a surprise?

If you don't want your mom's feelings to be hurt, then I would make a deal with a friend that you know will be invited, and have them tell you the date.

Then still act surprised when you get there!

For me, I absolutely hate surprises. I needed to be prepared and wanted to look my absolute best. That day I had my hair & makeup done and made sure I had an outfit I felt comfortable in.

Message edited 6/6/2011 5:23:23 PM.

Re: Was/is your shower a surprise?

min was not a surprise and i was even sent an invitation! haha!

could you just giver her your shower outfit and change when you get there?

Re: Was/is your shower a surprise?

My baby shower is not a surprise. I'm helping with the planning and all details. I hate surprises.

Re: Was/is your shower a surprise?

mine was not a surprise and i did not want it to be

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Mine is not going to be a surprise. In fact mom is using my house/backyard to host.

Re: Was/is your shower a surprise?

no not a surprise.
if you're uncomfortable with surprises, have your bff tell you the date on the sly. no one else has to know.

Re: Was/is your shower a surprise?

No, my one will be in MD so I obviously need to know when to be there. And the one here, people will be traveling to, so I need to know when they're coming. Not a fan of surprise showers for me personally anyway.

Re: Was/is your shower a surprise?

My mom does not like surprises, the idea stresses her. My bridal was not a surprise either. She also has fun doing the stuff to prepare with me. Maybe use that angle? for example my mom and I make the chocolate lollipops, wrap favors etc together.

Re: Was/is your shower a surprise?

nope i helped plan mine.
I liked it better that way- i hate surprises. Plus I got to help my MIL with the planning bc she lives OOT.

Re: Was/is your shower a surprise?

Ugh I can soooo identifiy. My mother is so traditional like that. I was put on bedrest and stressing about registering to my mom and never once did she mention that she already sent out invites with registry info on them - meanwhile I had no registry! When I freaked, she was like well its a surprise!

I feel the same way you do...believe me. I just feel like my mom is putting all this effort and money into planning a surprise shower so I don't want to ruin it for her. She's so excited about all of this. I just feel like anytime I'm invited anywhere I will have to be all dolled up...even if I think I'm just hitting the mall or whatever.

Re: Was/is your shower a surprise?

Mine was not a surprise, I actually wanted to be there before everyone so I could take pics, my mom thought I would be walking in as if it were a surprise, I told her that I told everyone I knew lol

I thought she was gonna cry when I said that so I explained to her that I hate being the center of attention as it is, so I got there like 5 minutes before it started and half the guests were there already.

I think even if the planner tries to make it a surprise you usually find out anyway cause your expecting it, so maybe just pretend like you don't know in front of her but like a PP said have a friend tell you

Re: Was/is your shower a surprise?

mine is not a surprise...i requested that it not be a surprise so I can be dressed nicely

Re: Was/is your shower a surprise?

Nope. Mines was on Sunday and it was not a surprise. I love planning to much to not get involved but I only had a hand in picking the favors and invites...they kinda made me back off a little

Re: Was/is your shower a surprise?

mine will be a surpirse and i dont really have a choice about it. my mom will not even talk to me if i bring up a shower. she says "who says you are having a shower." for some reason the surprise thing is big in my family.

anyway, you can have your DH or a close friend hold an outfit you picked out and some toiletries. on the day of your shower they can bring the outfit and accessories for you to change into. that way you can keep mom happy by keeping it a surprise but still wear what you want and feel good.

Re: Was/is your shower a surprise?

Nope. Not a fan of surprises. My mom was fine with it, she made me help!

Re: Was/is your shower a surprise?

Thanks to everyone for all the input and suggestions She's a first-time grandma and ultra-traditional when it comes to this stuff. I really want this to be special for her too so I'll see how it plays out. I would LOVE to help her put it together but that's sooo not happening! I won't have any problem getting one of my girls to tell me when it is so I may resort to that if she really wants to "surprise" me.

Re: Was/is your shower a surprise?

My shower was not a surprise. I'm not fond of surprises and I was able to then help my mom with all the planning so it wasn't overwhelming for her.

Re: Was/is your shower a surprise?

I hate surprises and told my mom after my bridal shower THAT WAS IT with surprises! I just really dont like them at all!!

So it will not be a surprise.

To compromise, tell her to just give you the date and everything else can be a surprise (theme, location, etc)

Re: Was/is your shower a surprise?

it won't be a surprise.. even if i wanted one.. too many schedules to juggle to fit a day.. and my mom gets really worked up over surprises.. so i'll be helping her and we'll do it together

Re: Was/is your shower a surprise?

Re: Was/is your shower a surprise?

no it wasnt. my mom and i planned it together which was a fun experience

Re: Was/is your shower a surprise?

Mine was not a suprise. I was there to greet my guests.

Re: Was/is your shower a surprise?

Mine is not a surprise and I am very involved.