Re: Unplanned PG Spinoff

Re: Unplanned PG Spinoff

He does have some say - he has say BEFORE they have sex.

Re: Unplanned PG Spinoff

Message edited 3/8/2006 10:04:23 PM.

Re: Unplanned PG Spinoff

I think he sorta gets his half.. he can pay some money every month and never know his child or he can be a real dad and take the responsibilties of a father which is very rewarding....
So in the end, he makes out too..I guess

Re: Unplanned PG Spinoff

Re: Unplanned PG Spinoff

Re: Unplanned PG Spinoff

well thats why they both have to know in the back of their heads before they have sex.. the guys gotta think to himself " if this chick gets pregnant I'll have to pay child support" and the girls gotta think " If he knocks me up, I will have to decide whether to keep this baby or have an abortion"
I mean.. yes the woman get the last decsion but a man KNOWS thats how it goes.. so if he needs to wear an extra rain coat.. he should

Re: Unplanned PG Spinoff

A close relative of mine was forced into a shotgun wedding with a woman at a very young age. Of course it resulted in a divorce. As unfair as it is for him to pay 17% of his salary until his child is 18 y.o., he made his decision. It may have beena 50% decision on each of their parts but ultimately 100% of the consequences are the woman's.

SHe is the one that has to either carry full term or terminate. Her body is the one taking the risk (either way). So I think because she has full responsiblity of the pregnancy, she gets 100% of the decision whether to go full term or abort.

Message edited 3/8/2006 10:17:54 PM.

Re: Unplanned PG Spinoff

I guess, at best, it's a lose/lose situation. This is why you really should know the person you are sleeping with better than you think you should.
I mean, on the one hand, is it unfair to the man who wants a baby, but the woman doesn't? YES, because then he's losing out on having a child, but it's ALSO unfair to the woman who does NOT want a child, but has to carry it for nine months, give birth and subsequently tie herself to it for life. Even if she hands over custody to the father, she still has to carry the kid for nine months, and being pregnant, I can tell you, that's no easy task. It takes a toll on every aspect of your life. Where is the consideration for the mother who does not want a baby when it comes to her possibly losing money if she has no maternity policy at work, or if she has no health insurance to get proper care for her unborn baby. What happens if she ends up on bedrest and can't work? All of those things wouldn't happen to an expectant father, just the mother.
So it's just a lose/lose situation, as far as I'm concerned with a man who wants the baby, but the woman doesn't.

Re: Unplanned PG Spinoff

Re: Unplanned PG Spinoff

Re: Unplanned PG Spinoff

Re: Unplanned PG Spinoff

if you're looking to complicate the argument (for argument's sake), we can throw in birth defects. My DH found out this past summer that if there was an issue of birth defects while pregnant, I would terminate. Imagine having THAT conversation after two kids -- talk about dodging a bullet). We both assumed the other felt the same way and it never came up in conversation.

What do you do when you are having a child, you've both agreed to have it but when an issue arises, one wants to terminate?

Message edited 3/8/2006 10:19:13 PM.

Re: Unplanned PG Spinoff

I'm willing to bet that more women than you'd think say TO HELL with a man who doesn't want anythign to do with their baby. I wouldn't want an absentee father taking any credit for raising my child. THat's just how I feel. I would rather work four jobs than take money from someone who wants nothign to do with my child. That's just MY opinion. Granted, many women NEED that money, but this is the exact reason my mother made SURE my sister and I went to college and got good jobs. She never wanted us to have to rely on a man for anything....epsecially not money. And this is from a woman who has been happily married for 35 yrs.

Re: Unplanned PG Spinoff

Well until science can figure a way for a man to carry a baby, this is the way it will be. When it comes down to it, it is a woman's body who has to deal with the pregnancy- not the man.

As for "if the female makes the decision to go ahead with a PG that the males objection is null and void..." he knew the consequences of having sex. Pregnancy is always a risk.

Re: Unplanned PG Spinoff

I definitely see what you're saying about it being unfair Jen. One of my friends in school was in that scenario. His girlfriend got pregnant and he was ready for the responsibility. He wanted to be a father and he wanted that baby. She wasn't ready though and even though he tried to talk her out of it, she got an abortion, because it was "her body" and "her choice". Sure, that's true, but it was his baby too. Like you said, when the tables are turned (the girls wants it and the guy doesn't), the guy can still be taken to court and be legally forced to pay child support and forced into the responsibility of fatherhood. It doesn't happen when it's the other way around and something just doesn't seem right about that.

Re: Unplanned PG Spinoff

Re: Unplanned PG Spinoff

I agree with Rachel.. If I got pregnant on a one night stand or with a man that really didnt want anything to do with me or a baby I wouldnt want him to have any part in my life.
Along with his money would come strings..


How many of you would take child support from a man who got your pregnant but didnt want anything to really do with you or your baby?

Re: Unplanned PG Spinoff

Message edited 3/8/2006 10:23:34 PM.

Re: Unplanned PG Spinoff

Re: Unplanned PG Spinoff

Re: Unplanned PG Spinoff

Re: Unplanned PG Spinoff

See. This is why this issue makes my head spin because not everyone's situation is the same, so for as many different scenarios I can come up with, I can have a different opinion on each one.

Re: Unplanned PG Spinoff

Re: Unplanned PG Spinoff