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starhead
LIF Zygote
Member since 5/05 48 total posts
Name:
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Re: There seems to be an epidemic lately....
I don't post here that often since I moved to California a few years ago (for my husband's job ) but the same thing happened to me.
I am now going through a divorce after my husband of 3 years (we had been together 12 years though) decided he didn't want to try anymore and didn't want to be married. I had been trying so hard to make things work and he didn't want to do anything. I must admit that I am much happier now that I am not trying to live up to somebody else's unrealistic expectations as to what marriage is like. It is better to be by yourself than with somebody who doesn't appreciate you or who isn't "into being married."
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Posted 2/15/07 1:46 PM  |
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Long Island Weddings
Long Island's Largest Bridal Resource |
MsMBV
:P
Member since 5/05 28602 total posts
Name:
Me
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Re: There seems to be an epidemic lately....
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| Posted 2/15/07 1:47 PM |
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MrsPorkChop
Twinning!!
Member since 5/05 9941 total posts
Name:
Missy
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Re: There seems to be an epidemic lately....
what they dont realize is that all of thier single friends are really single b.c they havent found the right girl to make them non-single. and in reality, these single guys envy the man that has a beautiful wife and a loving home.
i truly believe that.
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| Posted 2/15/07 1:50 PM |
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Re: There seems to be an epidemic lately....
Posted by MrsPorkChop
what they dont realize is that all of thier single friends are really single b.c they havent found the right girl to make them non-single. and in reality, these single guys envy the man that has a beautiful wife and a loving home.
i truly believe that.
I agree. Sooner or later the party lifestyle gets old. Do these guys want to be 40+ still at the bar looking for girls?
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| Posted 2/15/07 1:51 PM |
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DRMom
Two in Blue
Member since 5/05 20223 total posts
Name:
Melissa
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Re: There seems to be an epidemic lately....
Posted by Ambersmom
Posted by melijane
Posted by Phoebee
This was entirely my life a year ago!!
My, now ex-husband, left me 2 days before New Year's Eve saying we had "issues" and he couldn't do it anymore. The day before Valentine's day, after seeing a couselor only 3x's, he said it wasn't working and he wanted a divorce!
3x's is "working on it?" I broke into his e-mail acct. to find out he was having an affair w/ some whore from work. I still call her that- b/c SHE was going through a divorce and knew he was a married man! She certainly had no respect for herself, or his wife.
Both parties are sometimes equally as bad and there is really no rhyme or reason. I do firmly believe that MEN can not handle a lot all at once. Looking for a home, talk of starting a family, new job... that's to much! My ex was use to his Mommy doing everything for him, and wanted that in his wife. Surely, he did marry the wrong person!
I call that wedding/marriage "practice". As, we all make mistakes, but the truth is, I did love him enough to marry him. I made a commitment and took my vows very seriously. This is something that makes me proud of ME. He on the other hand, should be ashamed and will regret his moves one day.
For everyone who has been through this tragedy and who is going through it now.... there is something so much more wonderful right around the corner.
** I'm remarried now and expecting our 1st child. We couldn't be happier! We both equally love, respect eachother, ourselves and our relationship! Everyone should have that!
Sorry so nosy but did you meet you new DH after or did you know him already. Congratulations by the way!
Why does your question sort of sound passive-aggressive? What difference does that make?
I'm glad Phoebee shared her story. I know it gives me (and hopefully others on here who are going through the same thing) some hope for the future. Thanks and congrats Phoebee!
That is a misinterpretation on your part. It is not passive aggressive at all. I thought maybe knowing her story would help some of the girls on here going through this to stay positive.
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| Posted 2/15/07 2:21 PM |
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JenniferEver
The Disney Lady
Member since 5/05 18163 total posts
Name:
Jennifer
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Re: There seems to be an epidemic lately....
Posted by Marybeth222
Don't you feel like our parents generation of men seemed more "fatherly", honorable, trustworthy? Or is it just that the mothers stayed because they had to? It's very sad. You think you're in it for the long haul and bam in a second these guys are like I'm out. It's crazy.
not necessarily. My dad did this after 33 years of marriage. No explanation. Just decided he didn't want to deal anymore with the stress of being married and keeping up with the house, etc and left.
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| Posted 2/15/07 2:32 PM |
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imagin916
LIF Adult
Member since 6/05 1826 total posts
Name:
Valerie
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Re: There seems to be an epidemic lately....
Posted by missus-hbradio
I agree. Sooner or later the party lifestyle gets old. Do these guys want to be 40+ still at the bar looking for girls?
The funny part is, if my ex boyfriend stays true to his word, he WILL be the 40+ guy looking for girls at the bar with his friends!! This is one of the reasons why we broke up! I am not even trying to pretend that its the same thing as a marriage breaking up, but its the same idea you know? And he has a lot of friends who are the same way, planning to stay single for the rest of thier lives.
I used to cry all the time thinking that maybe it was just me, that I wasnt good enough and that is why he wanted to stay single, but now I know that nobody will ever be "the one". Now I say GOOD RIDDANCE!! 
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| Posted 2/15/07 3:08 PM |
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Shelly
She's 7!!!
Member since 8/05 14624 total posts
Name:
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Re: There seems to be an epidemic lately....
Posted by MrsPorkChop
what they dont realize is that all of thier single friends are really single b.c they havent found the right girl to make them non-single. and in reality, these single guys envy the man that has a beautiful wife and a loving home.
i truly believe that.
Its true. DH has 1 friend who is 35 and single. He goes out like crazy! But he always says he is sick of it and just wants what we have. To settle down and to start a family.
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| Posted 2/15/07 3:23 PM |
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Maathy317
Grammie's Little Man
Member since 2/06 3235 total posts
Name:
D
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Re: There seems to be an epidemic lately....
Posted by Kate07
Posted by MrsQiana
Why get married??????? Why would you put someone through this pain???? Why say vows of for better or worse????
I'm sorry but this upsets me so much that it makes me crazy with angry and sadness for everyone who has to go through this.
My heart goes out to you all going through this difficult situation!
Just know that there is someone out there for you waiting to love and treat you they way that you should.
_______________________________
I completely agree!!! I'm seeing this a lot with men and women.
I can't imagine how hurt I would be or how much I could hurt someone by being in either situation.
Also, it seems people just don't want to work at repairing the marriage. They just want out. Then down the line they will realize teh diasaster they created and will never be able to repair it.
And there is your answer. They don't want to work at it. We live in a throw-away society. When children break a toy, it is thrown away and a new one is bought. When a teenager wrecks a car, he/she gets another one. If a job is too hard, you move on to the next one. No wonder marriages break up so easily. Why work at repairing something when you've been shown all your life that you can get a new one so easily and there are no consequences for your actions? Granted, some marriages break up after 30 years even though both parties have tried to keep it together. For the majority, it's simply a matter of selfishness. They think only of themselves and not how their actions impact others. They've never had to think any other way. They were never taught. How very sad.
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| Posted 2/15/07 4:03 PM |
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FRAPPALICIOUS
sexxxxxy
Member since 10/05 2236 total posts
Name:
Me
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Re: There seems to be an epidemic lately....
And there is your answer. They don't want to work at it. We live in a throw-away society. When children break a toy, it is thrown away and a new one is bought. When a teenager wrecks a car, he/she gets another one. If a job is too hard, you move on to the next one. No wonder marriages break up so easily. Why work at repairing something when you've been shown all your life that you can get a new one so easily and there are no consequences for your actions? Granted, some marriages break up after 30 years even though both parties have tried to keep it together. For the majority, it's simply a matter of selfishness. They think only of themselves and not how their actions impact others. They've never had to think any other way. They were never taught. How very sad.
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| Posted 2/15/07 5:43 PM |
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JenniferEver
The Disney Lady
Member since 5/05 18163 total posts
Name:
Jennifer
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Re: There seems to be an epidemic lately....
Posted by Splooky
And there is your answer. They don't want to work at it. We live in a throw-away society. When children break a toy, it is thrown away and a new one is bought. When a teenager wrecks a car, he/she gets another one. If a job is too hard, you move on to the next one. No wonder marriages break up so easily. Why work at repairing something when you've been shown all your life that you can get a new one so easily and there are no consequences for your actions? Granted, some marriages break up after 30 years even though both parties have tried to keep it together. For the majority, it's simply a matter of selfishness. They think only of themselves and not how their actions impact others. They've never had to think any other way. They were never taught. How very sad.
it is SO true
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| Posted 2/16/07 11:48 AM |
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