Terrorist plot spinoff

The more often things like this happen, the more I second guess whether or not to have children...I'm not sure I'd want to bring them into a world like this...

Anyone else?

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I am not second guessing having children but this made me realize that I dont want to spend my whole life in fear... thats why we are thinking of moving out of nyc as soon as possible...

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I felt just like you after 9/11. but life does go on. I have to have faith that threats will continue to be thwarted.

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Sadly, that was one of my first thoughts when I heard that this morning.

Which is incredibly ironic as I am starting my IVF cycle today.

Ultimately, I think you just have to keep on living your life like you would, knowing that evil things are out there, doing whatever you can to stop them, and not letting it control you and the decisions you make.

But it's hard not to let it consume you sometimes.

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I guess for me, it's particularly difficult. My husband is British, I'm American - we're living in London right now and not travelling in order to visit my family is just not an option...I just imagine it'll just get worse when we have children.

And I don't think you can escape it by just moving out of NYC...it's the way the whole world is now. Nowhere seems safe anymore

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Well, since this has happened and I'm very newly preggos I'll answer...

NO I don't doubt my decision to have children.

There has been good and evil in this world since the beginning of time.

Both my brother and I were born during Vietnam. Some of my family members were born during the Irish Potato Famine, WWI, the Depression, WWII...
and while I'm sure that the women in my family had fears, especially when they were in daily direct danger or dying or very severe economic conditions they carried on.

I always tell my students that if good people stop having children and carrying out their lives then the only example in the world is the one perpetuated by those who are evil.

ETA: Of course not on the same scale, however, in the 80's my Dad took us to visit my family in Northern Ireland a few times and Belfast in particular. He had faith in the overwhemling security measures and checkpoints. He felt that it was most important to see our family.

There were so many Americans and Europeans at that time who wouldn't go to Belfast. Nothing ever happened while I was there.

Message edited 8/10/2006 9:11:23 AM.

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maybe it is not only nyc, but new york city is always a primary target...

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I think every generation had events that caused them to re-think having children. If I wanted kids, I wouldn't let it stop me.

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Posted by usuk2004

The more often things like this happen, the more I second guess whether or not to have children...I'm not sure I'd want to bring them into a world like this...

Anyone else?

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Posted by leighla

Sadly, that was one of my first thoughts when I heard that this morning.

Which is incredibly ironic as I am starting my IVF cycle today.

Ultimately, I think you just have to keep on living your life like you would, knowing that evil things are out there, doing whatever you can to stop them, and not letting it control you and the decisions you make.

But it's hard not to let it consume you sometimes.

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I mentioned it to DH once and his response was perfect. He said, maybe it will be our child who will become the force in the world to change things and make it better.

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No, it doesn't make me rethink having children but since I already have one, it does make me more fearful for him and the world he was born into. Ever since becoming a mother, things like this affect me so much more.

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Posted by SweetestOfPeas

I felt just like you after 9/11. but life does go on. I have to have faith that threats will continue to be thwarted.

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Just remember, the world has ALWAYS been this screwed up. It's nothing new. Look at the Holocaust, that was probably the most horrible thing I can think of. It's just the way the news is presented to us that makes us think we're much worse off now than ever before.

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It definitely saddens and scares me... for us, the fighting in Israel is more of a worry because our families are over there, most concerning, my MIL and BIL and his children. It's an impediment, yes, but my thought is that having children is the greatest contribution I can make to this messed up world. I can raise my children anyway I want, and it gives me such inspiration and hope to think taht I can raise a child without hatred like that... to raise someone who will have the courage, sensitivity and intelligence to make a difference and live through a better time.

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I was 33 weeks pregnant watching the towers fall from my office window on 9/11. I felt the same way as I rode the train home & my baby would not settle down in my belly. I remember my husband sitting next to me on the train. I put his hand on my belly. As the baby kicked his hand from inside, I thought "What kind of world am I bringing this child into?"

When I delivered the following week, I remember the nurse saying to me what a tough week it had been and how each baby born represented hope that things would be better.

Having a baby was the closest thing I ever came to participating in a miracle. If we all taught our children acceptance of others and how to share may be the world would be a better place.

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I think that with all of the scary stuff going on in the world we need to make sure that we are still giving ourselves the opportunity to do thinsg that bring us joy, instead of being overtaken by the fear that they are trying to enstill in us.

For me that joy comes greatly from my daughter and my family. It gives me something to be hopeful for and something to cheer me up during the day reguardless of if it is world events or my own personal drama that has brought me down.

They want us to stop our lives because of them, and I'm just not willing to do it.

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As a new mom, I tend to think we are living in one of the safer times in the world. Although there are terrible things happening, there have always been terrible things happening.

My mom was born right after WWII where most of my family was killed by the Nazi's. My maternal great grandparents were killed by the pogrums in Russia. My grandparents were born right before WWI in Europe. My grandfather fought in 2 wars before my mom was 5 years old. My dad was born in Syberia after his parents were taken from their home in Poland and sent to Russia during WWII. My GM was pregnant when she had to leave her family (who was later killed by the Nazi's) and go to Russia to live in a work camp.

There will always be stuff goign on in the world. But today there are so many protections that our parents and grandparents didn't have. Medical technology has saved so many lives and quality of life. People are also so much more aware of the dangers lurking around the corner and can protect themselves. We can all talk about the problems because our society is a lot more open then it was before.

Plus having a child makes your whole world so much better. It truly is a blessing.

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I agree with you all in thinking that a child would bring light and happiness into my life and all that - I know it would....but it's not my life I'm worried about. It's my future child's life. I'm worried about leaving a child to deal with all of this, and I'm not sure if it's selfish or not to have one.