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GoldenRod
10 years on LIF!
Member since 11/06 26792 total posts
Name:
Shawn
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Re: Small children and church
Posted by JenniferEver
Exactly. I think there's a difference between a baby crying intermmtitently and a full on temper tantrum, and yes, this does apply to infants as well.
Several pastors I've listened to said something along the lines of God speaking through the children, children should be in church because they are the embodiment of God, etc, etc. Most pastors I've seen actually encouraged children to be a part of the service, and make noise. As long as there isn't a full-blown tantrum going on, I don't see a problem with a child being in the presence of God. The Bible is full of references to "Let the children come unto me", and the fact that Jesus wanted kids around. Yes, some people want silence so they can reflect, but there needs to be some leeway given to the Children of God too....
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Posted 3/20/07 4:09 PM  |
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steph4777
**************
Member since 5/05 11726 total posts
Name:
Stephanie
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Re: Small children and church
Posted by QuoteTheRaven424
Posted by steph4777
OK... we have something called Children's Moment at the beginning of the service before the Gospel reading. They bring all the kids up to the altar and have a little lesson for them based on the Gospel/sermon. This is at an United Methodist Church.
that's at every mass?
Yup... it usually takes about 10-15 min. The thing I miss about Catholic services is that 45 min you are out. Our service is usually 1.5 hours.
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| Posted 3/20/07 4:10 PM |
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nrthshgrl
It goes fast. Pay attention.
Member since 7/05 57538 total posts
Name:
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Re: Small children and church
Posted by JenniferEver
unlike the infant who will cry and you can't always predict it, I think (and moms cna correct me if I'm wrong) parents have some control over a toddler, and can teach the toddler behavior in church and be able to predict if your toddler can't handle a full mass.
You have little control over toddler tantrums. The difficulty (and this is where you get a bratty child) is the quickest way to stop a tantrum is to give in.
When they get a little older (3-4 yo), you can bribe/threaten.
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| Posted 3/20/07 4:11 PM |
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Gertyrae
Peace out Homies!
Member since 5/05 20046 total posts
Name:
Gerty ®
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Re: Small children and church
See, I agree with Jennifer on this.
It's more about discipline than anything else. We went to church as a family along with other places and never made a sound. And my mom was a single mom with six kids. She took us to restaurants all the time and church every Sunday. If we made a peep, she would threaten us with "the pinch".
People just don't discipline their children anymore, so they scream and run with no regard.
And I know I am totally getting flamed for this one!!!
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| Posted 3/20/07 4:11 PM |
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evnme
My little lamb
Member since 8/05 12633 total posts
Name:
aka momma2b
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Re: Small children and church
the child should be taken out of the sanctuary
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| Posted 3/20/07 4:11 PM |
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QuoteTheRaven424
22 Months?!!!!
Member since 5/05 13659 total posts
Name:
And If That Isn't A True Blue Miracle
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Re: Small children and church
Posted by Gertyrae
See, I agree with Jennifer on this.
It's more about discipline than anything else. We went to church as a family along with other places and never made a sound. And my mom was a single mom with six kids. She took us to restaurants all the time and church every Sunday. If we made a peep, she would threaten us with "the pinch".
People just don't discipline their children anymore, so they scream and run with no regard.
And I know I am totally getting flamed for this one!!!
you won't get flamed on ONE condition...
what's "the pinch?" 
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| Posted 3/20/07 4:12 PM |
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Gertyrae
Peace out Homies!
Member since 5/05 20046 total posts
Name:
Gerty ®
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Re: Small children and church
She would grab a tiny piece of skin on our upper arm and pinch and twist it.
BTW, we weren't allowed to cry when she pinched us...then we would just get our a$$es kicked!!!
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| Posted 3/20/07 4:16 PM |
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QuoteTheRaven424
22 Months?!!!!
Member since 5/05 13659 total posts
Name:
And If That Isn't A True Blue Miracle
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Re: Small children and church
Posted by Gertyrae
She would grab a tiny piece of skin on our upper arm and pinch and twist it.
BTW, we weren't allowed to cry when she pinched us...then we would just get our a$$es kicked!!!
ouch 
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| Posted 3/20/07 4:17 PM |
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eroxgirl
My Loves
Member since 5/05 15697 total posts
Name:
Rebecca
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Re: Small children and church
Posted by QuoteTheRaven424
In this case though, the priest took the pulpit and stood there and waited for the mother to take the kid outside.
My uncle was a Catholic priest and if he were alive, I'd swear you were talking about him. He (like the rest of my family) had no tolerance for temper tantrums and would wait for you to remove your child before continuing his sermon.
Maybe it's because my mom was so strict, but I was taught very young not to act up in public. I have no kids yet so who knows what I'll do when the time comes, but I don't imagine I'd take my child to church if I knew them to be prone to tantrums.
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| Posted 3/20/07 4:17 PM |
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steph4777
**************
Member since 5/05 11726 total posts
Name:
Stephanie
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Re: Small children and church
Posted by Gertyrae
See, I agree with Jennifer on this.
It's more about discipline than anything else. We went to church as a family along with other places and never made a sound. And my mom was a single mom with six kids. She took us to restaurants all the time and church every Sunday. If we made a peep, she would threaten us with "the pinch".
People just don't discipline their children anymore, so they scream and run with no regard.
And I know I am totally getting flamed for this one!!!
My mom did the pinch also, but came after the "look".
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| Posted 3/20/07 4:18 PM |
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eroxgirl
My Loves
Member since 5/05 15697 total posts
Name:
Rebecca
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Re: Small children and church
Posted by Gertyrae
She would grab a tiny piece of skin on our upper arm and pinch and twist it.
BTW, we weren't allowed to cry when she pinched us...then we would just get our a$$es kicked!!!
I was raised the same way!! I don't know if that's good or not, but that's just how it was for me!
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| Posted 3/20/07 4:18 PM |
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Shelly
She's 7!!!
Member since 8/05 14624 total posts
Name:
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Re: Small children and church
I take Jordana to temple. I try to go every Friday night. So I assume church is comparable to temple in this situation.
When she starts to fuss and cry, I take her out. Its not fair to every one who is there to have to listen to her. I try to sit near the back and on an aisle seat because I know I may have to dart out.
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| Posted 3/20/07 4:47 PM |
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mrswask
Pookie Love
Member since 5/05 20229 total posts
Name:
Michal
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Re: Small children and church
Posted by SweetestOfPeas
IMO, when a kid starts screaming, whether its in a church, restaurant, or any enclosed place, the kid should be taken outside.
I think it is very rude for parents to treat their kids like they're home and just ignore the screaming kid and subject everyone in an enclosed place to it.
Agreed 100% In the synagogue I grew up in, we were lucky - there were multiple separate services for children of different ages. But I also full out remember standing outside in the lobby area with my uncle while my newborn cousin screamed in his carriage. I think it is disrespectful and rude to others to allow a baby, toddler, whatever to scream and cry and not remove the child - whether it be a temple, church, movie, etc.
I also know that when I look to join a synagogue again, a priority for me will be finding one that I consider to be "family friendly" in terms of having different services, etc.
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| Posted 3/20/07 4:51 PM |
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Palebride
I am an amazing bakist
Member since 5/05 13673 total posts
Name:
Lori
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Re: Small children and church
Babies and infants are one thing - you can't really control what they're doing, and they're also not getting all that much from the church experience if they can't understand it, so I would take them outside.
Small children though...they should know to behave. My parents used to bribe us. If we behaved through the mass, we would stop by a store afterwards and we were allowed to each pick out one candy bar of our choice - the "prize" for behaving.
One week, three of us were bad, and my sister was the only good one. We watched as she picked out her candy bar AND soda! I must have been 7 or 8 at the time, but I'll never forget that!
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| Posted 3/20/07 4:52 PM |
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saraH
happy birthday sweet kate!
Member since 5/05 16555 total posts
Name:
I know that God exsists, I held her in my arms...
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Re: Small children and church
i think the child shoud be removed. no one can enjoy the service when there is a 3 year old screaming his head off for no apparent reason.
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| Posted 3/20/07 4:55 PM |
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Jesaroo
is not the girl you knew
Member since 5/05 14266 total posts
Name:
Jes
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Re: Small children and church
id take my kids out. but i think the priest was wrong fro making a spectable out of her.
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| Posted 3/20/07 4:57 PM |
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tourist
Member since 5/05 10425 total posts
Name:
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Re: Small children and church
Posted by steph4777
At the same, I believe that church is something that a family should do together and parents should not have to avoid services bc they have kids. I've actually never heard of masses or services designated specifically for families.
I think that's largely a Catholic thing.
The Episcopal church where I got married has 2 services-8am & 10am.
The 10 am one coincides with Sunday school & then the kids are brought up to the church for Communion.
This works out well, because the kids don't have to sit the whole time, and they are learning on their own level, instead of being bored because they don't understand.
Of course, this is for school aged kids, so there are babies in the church the whole time, but babies cry.
Our priest actually told a mom not to leave when she was going to take her baby outside. (The baby wasn't that bad)
Older kids should be brought outside, not only to not disturb the service, but because they have to learn that screaming in church is not acceptable.
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| Posted 3/20/07 5:04 PM |
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MsMBV
:P
Member since 5/05 28602 total posts
Name:
Me
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Re: Small children and church
I am not Catholic so please forgive if I am not familiar with "protocol," but it seems to me that for the people that are their for prayer & guidance ar not able to then get that b/c of the disruption. I know that children are baptised at a young age in some churches, but at what point is it a welcome environment for them? I know it is tough for the parents as well, who would like to attend services on a regular basis, what are they supposed to do, stay home or hire a sitter once a week? I think the "family mass" seems a good solution & should be used as such. I think to bring a disruptive child to a mass that is not really "for" children when there is one available for that purpose is a little disrespectful to parishoners & I am glad the priest stopped & made kind of a big deal about it. 
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| Posted 3/20/07 5:04 PM |
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JenniferEver
The Disney Lady
Member since 5/05 18163 total posts
Name:
Jennifer
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Re: Small children and church
Well, I mean more like there are cues witha toddler where you'll be able to tell if you'r child is ready to take on a full mass, or if the child starts to complain, or fidget, then you know it's probably time to go.
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| Posted 3/20/07 5:12 PM |
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JenniferEver
The Disney Lady
Member since 5/05 18163 total posts
Name:
Jennifer
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Re: Small children and church
Yeah this is what I meant. bribe, threaten, practice at home, asses behavior at restaraunts, etc. you have some control/prediction for that. SOME. But for an infant, there's not much you can do about it.
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| Posted 3/20/07 5:15 PM |
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leighdvm
My golden boys!
Member since 3/06 4419 total posts
Name:
Michele
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Re: Small children and church
It's actually a pet peeve of mine when I am trying to listen to the sermon, children are talking, crying, etc. The Pastor actually makes an announcement before the service telling parents that right outside of the room, in the Narthex, there is a sitting area and speakers so that the parents can still listen to the service and their children will not disturb those who are trying to worship. At this church, most parents are considerate and take the noisy children out, but unfortunately, some do not. It really ticks me off, actually....
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| Posted 3/20/07 5:15 PM |
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CathyB
Member since 5/05 19403 total posts
Name:
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Re: Small children and church
Posted by leighdvm
The Pastor actually makes an announcement before the service telling parents that right outside of the room, in the Narthex, there is a sitting area and speakers so that the parents can still listen to the service and their children will not disturb those who are trying to worship.
I wish my church had something like this. So for now I just don't bring them since I know they won't be able to stay quiet for that long.
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| Posted 3/20/07 5:20 PM |
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IrishTracy
Believe!!
Member since 5/05 15167 total posts
Name:
Tracy
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Re: Small children and church
I think the priest was wrong to stop & make the mother feel bad.
If my child is making a ruckus I would take him/her out.
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| Posted 3/20/07 10:02 PM |
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Goldi0218
My miracles!
Member since 12/05 23902 total posts
Name:
Leslie
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Re: Small children and church
I am not Catholic, but this happens in temples too.
To be honest, to expect a child of a certain age to be able to sit for any length of time is flat out unfair. Children are curious and anxious beings. They cannot always appropriate express unhappiness and discomfort. That being said, parents should keep that in mind when bringing children to a service that may last over an hour. 2-3 year olds (the age of the child in question in the OP) dont sit for an hour.
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| Posted 3/20/07 10:20 PM |
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Re: Small children and church
When we were scheduling my sons Baptism, our Priest told us not to bother doing it if we did not plan to bring the child to Sunday Mass, and he meant from birth right on up. We do not have a childrens mass either.
Now its only common sense to remove the toddler/preschooler to calm them down, but to embarrass the mother in this case into doing it, I think was childish on the Priests part.
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| Posted 3/20/07 11:33 PM |
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