SAHM's...

What are your plans once the kids go to School full time? Go back to your original job? New job? Part time/full time? Or not go back at all? Would it matter to either you or DH if you had a pension? And finally, is DH on the same page as you/does he want the same? ( i.e. random example: you want to go back to work full time but he thinks part time would be better so you can still drop off/pick up kids or vice versa)
I plan on going back, but undecided if I will go back to same job for some of the above reasons but I'm not sure if I want to sacrifice my pension.

Message edited 1/22/2015 7:09:05 PM.

SAHM's...

Right now i work part time and have 1 child. When we have 2 i plan to stay home. When both are in school full time i would like to get something part time locally possibly full time not sure. I currently work in the city and its too far so thats the only reason why i wouldnt go back.

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I was a teacher before having kids however, I REFUSE to EVER go back into the city again and teach. I hated it and the commute from Stony Brook to Queens was just too much. When my youngest is in elementary school, which is still years away, the only thing I'd consider doing is sub'ing in my district. This way I have some extra money BUT I can work when I want and still be around for my kids as needed when they are sick, have days off, have field trips, and to get them on and off the bus.

I wouldn't go back to working F/T and I definitely wouldn't take a job that's not in the schools in some capacity. By the time my DS's is in Kindergarten I will have been a SAHM for 10 yrs, at that point we don't NEED the extra money, I'd just be working to give myself something to do and have some fun money. Also, we both feel it is important, even though the kids will be in school, that one of us is around and available to them. So to answer your question, yes, DH and I are on the same page.

All the above being said, I'm pretty sure I might just enjoy all of the free time to myself for a while before actually working at all.......even if it is just P/T.

SAHM's...

I am a SAHM and my DD is in elementary school. I never plan on going back to work. Luckily we are very comfortable with just my DH's salary and I don't need too. I am very active with school and on the PTA board as well as the Special Education PTA Board and some committees within the district. That is a job in itself lol. DD is also special needs and I am constantly up at school meeting with her therapists, consultants, teachers so it is better for me to be home for her. DH is on the same page as me.

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i'm a SAHM- my DS is 4. i've been home with him for about 2.5 years.
i'm a speech therapist and worked in elementary schools for about 8 years before he came along. so i built up my own pension and still have that saved. DH is a government employee and has good benefits and pension- so we're good there, too
Luckily, speech therapy is a field that will be easy to jump back into when i'm ready. it also has a lot of different part time positions i could get and still make good money.
so my plan once he starts full day school is to go back part time- like 2-3 days a week- seeing some EI clients or whatever. so that i'll be making money and still be able to be around for him when i need to be.
DH and i both feel like its important for one of us to be around for DS- so we're on the same page with all of it

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Honey 2223 ...what type of job did you have that you had a pension?

I will be going back to work when my youngest is in school FT. I will work where I can find a job local. Our SD has before care and after care ( but I need to pick him/her up by 6:00.) We are managing now but know our expenses are going to go up and we want to do more things than what we are doing now ( like go back to putting money away for retirement, kids activities etc.)I do have a graduate degree in HR but never was fortunate enough to have a job with a pension.

Anyway, it does not have to be in HR when I go back, as long as the pay is acceptable and it is local b/c DH works in Manhattan and takes LIRR ... we all know how reliable they are LOL!

Message edited 1/22/2015 9:33:22 PM.

SAHM's...

We have a few years before my youngest is in elementary school but I plan on maybe getting something part time when all three are in school full time. It is very important to me that I be home when the kids get home from school.

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My plans are the following

1.pee alone
2.nap
3.nap
4.eat hot foods with two hands
5.nap

After all
This for like a yr I want to get a pt job

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I'm in this position right now, actually. My third and youngest is 4 and started pre-k full-time in September...I'm a free woman!!

You know, I was an English teacher and used to say I was running right back once my last was in school. Then I said, 'Hmmmm...maybe a year to decompress wouldn't be so bad." My "decompression year" now involves teaching a toddler class two mornings a week as well as volunteering a lot at school--I'm the secretary of the Mothers' Club. I also do yoga and meet friends for lunch and come up with excuses why I don't clean the bathroom. Then from 2:45pm on I live out of my minivan. This is SO NOT what I expected my life to be like, yet I can't imagine it any other way. I think the world of working moms and simply cannot imagine how they do it all. And yet, I can't imagine not doing that too; in other words, giving up my beloved former career.

So my plan now is to send out very very few resumes this spring and see if I get any replies. I do not need to work for the money, but for myself so I am extremely lucky in this way. If I get a call, great; if not, great. My DH and I are on the same page--in fact, he thinks I should reevaluate sending out those resumes

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This coming September my kids will be in school FT. I always thought I would go back at that point. Now, the thought of sitting in an office till 5:30-6 knowing my kids are home from school , I'm thinking if I can find a job where I am home by 3, I'll take it. If not, I don't know. I just feel very lost at this point in my life.


Neither of us have pension, so there is no benefit there. DH had a SAHM and SAH grandma to cater to him his whole life. My parents worked insane hours and I didn't see them much at all. DH just wants me to make a decision and stick with it. He feels like it's not worth it to work PT and makes more sense to just stay home

ETA this is a great question BTW

Message edited 1/22/2015 11:05:39 PM.

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I have one dd 19 months now and preg with dd2 so this is a ways off. But once I'm done having kids and they're all in at least kindergarten I would want to go back, part time on Long Island. No way would I go back to my full time job in the city.

Re: SAHM's...

Posted by Eireann

I'm in this position right now, actually. My third and youngest is 4 and started pre-k full-time in September...I'm a free woman!!

You know, I was an English teacher and used to say I was running right back once my last was in school. Then I said, 'Hmmmm...maybe a year to decompress wouldn't be so bad." My "decompression year" now involves teaching a toddler class two mornings a week as well as volunteering a lot at school--I'm the secretary of the Mothers' Club. I also do yoga and meet friends for lunch and come up with excuses why I don't clean the bathroom. Then from 2:45pm on I live out of my minivan. This is SO NOT what I expected my life to be like, yet I can't imagine it any other way. I think the world of working moms and simply cannot imagine how they do it all. And yet, I can't imagine not doing that too; in other words, giving up my beloved former career.

So my plan now is to send out very very few resumes this spring and see if I get any replies. I do not need to work for the money, but for myself so I am extremely lucky in this way. If I get a call, great; if not, great. My DH and I are on the same page--in fact, he thinks I should reevaluate sending out those resumes

SAHM's...

I don't know what I will do. My dh wants me to go back to work. I def do not want to go back to teaching in public school. I only did it for 2 years before having kids, so not much time invested. In in CT not NY now and my licenses are a mess lol. I have to straighten those out. I taught prek before that and loved it. So I may go back for that. I like being at home but sometimes feel like I need to work. Pt would be great. I'm still not 100% sure. It makes me crazy lol

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I still have awhile to go as I'm PG with #2 right now, but I always said I'd go back part time. I am lucky that in my field I can get a job and just work maybe 4 hours a day so I can be back for school pickup.
of I can't get a job in my field I want to find anything part time for a few hours a day. I don't have it in me to be a SAHM forever.

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DW is SAHM and we have a 6th grader and a 3rd grader. Between many days off, half-days, early dismissal, daytime events, things going on at the school, etc., we don't see how DW could have any type of real job and be able to be home for the kids while they are home, and attend all of the school functions. Plus, any job would have to fit in between an 8:30ish pickup and a 2pm dropoff school day, since DC are in different schools.
It's not as simple as it seems before DC are actually in school.

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I have been home for five years. One son is in first grade, and the other will start kindergarten next school year.

My goal is to find part time work or a job where I can telecommute. DH works long hours and we need someone around to take care of the kids when they are sick, days off, getting them to activities, etc.

My DH says it is up to me. We live in VA, and the cost of living is great because I don't need to work. However, the money I can bring in would really help with retirement savings, paying for college, etc.

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I've been a SAHM for 6 years so far. My oldest is in kindergarten, my DD#1 will go next year, and then we have our youngest who just turned 1, so we have a ways to go. We are trying for #4 as well.

Fortunately, financially we do well on DHs income, so I don't ever need to work, but I feel like I'm wasting money on my degree ((still paying student loans)) for nothing. I'd like to do something part time eventually, but I don't see that being possible with half days/days off/field trips etc. we don't have any family where we live to count on, so it makes it a bit difficult, luckily I don't have to worry about it for some time, bc I really can't decide.

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I have no idea what I will do once they are get older and need me less. I won't work until they go to hs probably. Dh is in agreement that it would be senseless for me to work. I love being home with my kids and get so sad thinking about them going to school full time. I think I really will be a bit bored so I'm thinking maybe I'll go back and get my masters and than work once they go to hs. I'm really just trying to enjoy these years while they are small.

Re: SAHM's...

Just to give you a different perspective for things you might not consider/have to think about as a SAHM -
Like another poster said, it's NOT a simple thing as just getting a PT job. You have to consider your hours, days working, do you hve to work weekends, commuting time etc etc

I personally find it more difficult of a schedule as a FTWM when the kids are older. My oldest is in K this year - it's not as simple anymore as drop off at daycare at x time and pick up at y time -
Now there is before/after care and sports practice and 5 million things happening during school hours.
There is homework and games and, and, and. -
There is camp during the summer (again, I need to do an early drop off/later pick up)

I think it was 100x easier to be a FTWM w/ a baby, than with a school aged child. (not that it was easy, but you KWIM)

So, unless you're going to get a job in your own school district, have the summer off etc. - You're going to have to deal w/ most of the same aggravation (and expenses) a FTWM does ..........

Message edited 1/23/2015 2:27:28 PM.

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Im still home. Dh is fine with it. I need to be here for school stuff, sickness, and basic day to day things. This is my job, my family and home. Pay isnt so great, but the reward is.

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Well, as long as my children are young, I plan to stay home. As they get older and have their own lives, I would like to go back to work. I think it would be good for me to work when the time comes that they are off doing their own thing. I always want to feel needed and could see myself getting too clingy if I don't have a career in the long-term future.

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I have one in full time school and one that will be next year but is currently in 5 1/2 days. I agree with the above poster that says things get harder as they get older! I can't imagine finding someone to replicate what I do every day nor do I think I would want to! I always planned I would go back to work when my children were both in full time school but, now I'm thinking more middle school and high school. My days are more busy now then they were when the kids were home with me! I'm very involved in both of their schools in a number of different things and am there many days during the week. I have just enough time for that, laundry, cleaning, grocery shopping etc. that I haven't even found the time yet to get to the gym! Then, as poster said when my oldest does get out of school at 3 the rest of the day is CRAZY running all over the place, doing hw and projects, dinner and bed! Maybe I will feel different next year when both are in full time school but, I will say I find this time to be even more important than when they were babies in some ways. I truly believe that me being involved in their school and lives makes a huge difference. Anyway, who knows my opinion could change in a few years again! I'm learning on the go here!

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