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Just wondering

Posted By Message

AMPirate
Missing our peanut :(

Member since 11/09

1678 total posts

Name:
Antoinette

Just wondering

How many ladies are on here that are in their 30's and trying for your first child?

I am 33 (soon to be 34) and am trying for my first. I feel the pressure of time and age so much. Each month that passes with a BFN I just feel more and more sad and hopeless. I read the stats on how your chances slim with each passing year. I have the parents harping on when I am going to make them grandparents already. Sometimes it just gets to be too much. Then I wonder what I'll do if its not in the cards for us and how long do we try before we explore other options.

Any other 'older' Chat Icon ladies going through this?

Posted 3/11/10 9:53 AM
 
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BabyFever10
St. Gianna Pray for us

Member since 9/09

1326 total posts

Name:

Re: Just wondering

Unfortunatley im in this club....im 34 (and a half) and DH is 40

Because of our ages (and some known possible issues) we only waited 6 months to see an RE....which im even kickin myself we waited that long b/c the things we thought might be issues definately are and now we have to wait at least 3-6 months to see if medication will correct and then can try again.

We're gonna wait at least 3 months and see what progress we've made to discuss possible other options (adoption)

Posted 3/11/10 10:10 AM
 

jteach
2 and through

Member since 9/07

3939 total posts

Name:
Jess

Re: Just wondering

I turned 31 in December and DH is 38, so we are definetly not young.

We only got married in July of 08 and we bought our first house July of 09 so it was just the natural progression. If we would have met earlier in life we would have gotten married earlier and then bought a house earlier and then obviously ttc earlier, but that is not what happened so here we are in our 30's and I think there is nothing wrong with it.

If you were in your 40's trying for your first I would maybe be concerned but people are having kids later and later these days and mid 30's does not make my jaw drop.

The time will come for us all and if it happens to not come then there are alternatives to look into. I think people really need to start practicing more positive thinking. If you think it, it will come
Chat Icon

Posted 3/11/10 10:14 AM
 

mimid15
LIF Infant

Member since 10/09

347 total posts

Name:

Re: Just wondering

Im turning 34 next week! Chat Icon

DH is 33 and we have been TTC since Sept 09...Im kicking myself for not stopping BCP months before the wedding. I stopped the month before and thought my body would bounce back but not so much since Im yet to have a regular cycle!

Each month that goes by I cant help but do the math in my head and think time is running out bc I really want 3 little ones!!

Posted 3/11/10 10:54 AM
 

AMPirate
Missing our peanut :(

Member since 11/09

1678 total posts

Name:
Antoinette

Re: Just wondering

Posted by mimid15

Im turning 34 next week! Chat Icon

DH is 33 and we have been TTC since Sept 09...Im kicking myself for not stopping BCP months before the wedding. I stopped the month before and thought my body would bounce back but not so much since Im yet to have a regular cycle!

Each month that goes by I cant help but do the math in my head and think time is running out bc I really want 3 little ones!!



Me too! I will be happy with however many children I am able to have, of course, but I have always wanted to have three and I don't think it's feasible at this point. This month I realized is the last cycle for me to get PG and actually have a baby in 2010. Chat Icon The time just keeps slipping away so fast.

Posted 3/11/10 11:55 AM
 

nraboni
Uggh...

Member since 10/09

6905 total posts

Name:
Nicole

Re: Just wondering

I turned 31 in August 09 and DH turned 32 in October 09. We were married in Sept 09 and we started TTC right away. If DH had it his way we would have been TTC before the wedding.

Now looking back, I wish I had stopped BCP a year ago and let things happen as they were to happen even if I did get PG before the wedding. I never imagined it would take this long...and I know that 5 months isn't long but like many of you I am a planner and taking this long was not part of my plan!

Posted 3/11/10 12:03 PM
 

AnxiousPants
LIF Adolescent

Member since 10/09

864 total posts

Name:
EDD 10/22!

Re: Just wondering

I'm in my early 30s, as is DH.

DH & I dated a looooong time before getting engaged, because he wasn't ready yet. I was ready quite a long time before he was.

As frustrating as that was at the time, its a bit frustrating to me know because part of me thinks maybe this would have been easier if we had gotten married earlier in our relationship.

We also waited until we had been married 2 years before TTC.

Sigh.

Whatever will be, will be.

Message edited 3/11/2010 12:04:43 PM.

Posted 3/11/10 12:04 PM
 

Superkat
More a stranger than a friend

Member since 5/06

9730 total posts

Name:
K

Re: Just wondering

I was 31 when TTC my first child and 33 while TTC my second. I am now pregnant with our second baby. Chat Icon

Posted 3/11/10 12:07 PM
 

babydreaming
LIF Adult

Member since 3/07

1130 total posts

Name:

Re: Just wondering

If it makes you feel a bit better, I had the same feeling the first time. We are now TTC our second. I was almost 35 when DC was born so I was working on conceiving when I was 33/34. DH was 37/38. We were not young and I felt really stressed with time and my work schedule.

We got pregnant in our 6th mth of trying. I tested the morning DH had an appointment with a RE and were shocked when we got a BFP.

Now, I am not a few weeks away from turning 36 (DH is 40) and trying not to think too much about time and just trying our best to enjoy ourselves. Its still hard.

Posted 3/11/10 12:13 PM
 

MrsH2009
Thank you St. Gerard!

Member since 8/09

6631 total posts

Name:
M

Re: Just wondering

We're both 32 and I will be 33 by the time we are actively trying (this summer.) My mom didn't have my sister till she was 40 (she was a surprise), so I've never really worried about it. Also, I'm a teacher and my children are 8, and all of their parents are in the 40s (if not 50s). It just seems that early 30s is a common time to have children now.

Posted 3/11/10 12:20 PM
 

MrsH2009
Thank you St. Gerard!

Member since 8/09

6631 total posts

Name:
M

Re: Just wondering

Posted by AnxiousPants

I'm in my early 30s, as is DH.

DH & I dated a looooong time before getting engaged, because he wasn't ready yet. I was ready quite a long time before he was.

As frustrating as that was at the time, its a bit frustrating to me know because part of me thinks maybe this would have been easier if we had gotten married earlier in our relationship.

We also waited until we had been married 2 years before TTC.

Sigh.

Whatever will be, will be.



We also waited a long time before getting engaged, because of DH, which is why we are only waiting one year to TTC.

Posted 3/11/10 12:21 PM
 

AMPirate
Missing our peanut :(

Member since 11/09

1678 total posts

Name:
Antoinette

Re: Just wondering

Posted by MrsH2009

We're both 32 and I will be 33 by the time we are actively trying (this summer.) My mom didn't have my sister till she was 40 (she was a surprise), so I've never really worried about it. Also, I'm a teacher and my children are 8, and all of their parents are in the 40s (if not 50s). It just seems that early 30s is a common time to have children now.



My mom was 24 when she had her first and so I am sure that has something to do with my perception. I know that now it's more typical for the parents to be in their 40's when their children are school aged so at least I won't be the only one Chat Icon

Posted 3/11/10 12:38 PM
 

BabyFactory
LIF Infant

Member since 8/09

249 total posts

Name:
Can't tell ya ;)

Re: Just wondering

Yup! 31 Chat Icon

It's always..oh, wait till we get a house...oh, wait till after vacation..oh, wait until after....

We want more than one too so we will most likely be in the 2 under 2 club.

It's scary b/c there is no guarantee that we will get pg on the first try, or 2nd, or 3rd, or 12th!!!!

We are hoping to have 2 at least before I'm 35.

Posted 3/11/10 12:48 PM
 

Hofstra26
Love to Bake!

Member since 7/06

27915 total posts

Name:

Re: Just wondering

I was 32 when I conceived my DD and 33 wen she was born. I am trying for #2 now and I am 34 but will be 35 at the end of this month. Chat Icon

Posted 3/11/10 12:49 PM
 

Cheeks24
Living a dream

Member since 1/08

8589 total posts

Name:
Cheeks

Re: Just wondering

I'm 30 and DH is 32 (33 next month) and we have not started TTC yet.

Posted 3/11/10 12:52 PM
 

Mrs-D-Girl
Love my fur baby

Member since 8/07

5183 total posts

Name:

Re: Just wondering

I am 33 and pregnant with my first Child. I got married at 31 and personally wanted to wait a couple of years. I did not let the age thing get to me so much, I knew I was not ready to have a child sooner.

Posted 3/11/10 2:34 PM
 

maybeababy2010
LIF Adult

Member since 8/09

1423 total posts

Name:

Re: Just wondering

I will be 30 shortly and my DH is 31. We haven't started yet, but hopefully soon!

The thought of having a child never even crossed my mind until the last year, so just wasn't ready when I was younger. In some ways I am sure it will be harder, but it's easier in some ways too. We are more mature, we own a home, settled in our careers, etc.

Posted 3/11/10 2:47 PM
 
 

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