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CroatianBride
Our Angel Ivanka Rose <3
Member since 7/07 2031 total posts
Name:
Tat
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Is this a little ballsy or is it just me?
Ok, so my friend gets engaged and moves into a new apartment with her boyfriend (a rented apt not purchased). The boyfriend has been living on his own for a while but moved out of his apt to a bigger apt that can suit them both. She tells me they're going to have a party once they get everything set up-and that they're registered at so and so store...I was like "what?? You registered for a party?" She said “yeah well I’m providing food and alcohol so you better be getting me a gift” in like a joking way…fast forward a few weeks, she sends an evite and the “Housewarming” is on a Sunday early afternoon- initially it was supposed to be on a Saturday night, when drinking would actually occur.
I would’ve probably got her something regardless but the fact that I now feel like I have to is what gets me. With all the items on her registry for a housewarming, I wonder what will be left for her bridal shower...
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Posted 8/13/09 9:54 AM  |
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Long Island Weddings
Long Island's Largest Bridal Resource |
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Re: Is this a little ballsy or is it just me?
Yeah, that's pretty tacky. I'd go. Bring something you'd normally bring to any get-together at someone's house. (i.e. appetizer, dessert, beer).
I wonder what her other friends think. I know if someone in our "group" did this they would be "the talk" and not in a good way.
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| Posted 8/13/09 10:00 AM |
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neener1211
:-)
Member since 4/07 22952 total posts
Name:
J
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Re: Is this a little ballsy or is it just me?
I would never think to look on a registry for someone's housewarming party. If anything, I would bring a bottle of wine.
But to expect a gift (even if she was half joking) is ballsy. It would probably make me show up with nothing, or not even go.
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| Posted 8/13/09 10:01 AM |
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smdl
I love Gary too..on a plate!
Member since 5/06 32461 total posts
Name:
me
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Re: Is this a little ballsy or is it just me?
Asking for a gift is NEVER appropriate. Even jokingly! Whether for a housewarming gift, bridal shower, baby shower, birthday party, etc...
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| Posted 8/13/09 10:03 AM |
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MarathonKnitter
HAPPY
Member since 2/07 17374 total posts
Name:
EMBRACING CHANGE
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Re: Is this a little ballsy or is it just me?
i think it's ballsy
with all i've been through, lately, i would find a reason not to go... but that's just me
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| Posted 8/13/09 10:11 AM |
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JP826
=)
Member since 9/06 10903 total posts
Name:
Me!! All about ME!
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Re: Is this a little ballsy or is it just me?
Bring something edible, & try to eat it all yourself. 
Yes, ballsy indeed!
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| Posted 8/13/09 10:15 AM |
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freshstuff
I would do me
Member since 5/08 1188 total posts
Name:
Michelle
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Re: Is this a little ballsy or is it just me?
ballsy
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| Posted 8/13/09 10:17 AM |
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irishbaby
LIF Adolescent
Member since 5/08 582 total posts
Name:
M
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Re: Is this a little ballsy or is it just me?
Yeah I heard that my ex and his new "classy" satin jacket wearing gf did this too.
Housewarmings IMO are for when you PURCHASE..... a home,apt,condo together.
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| Posted 8/13/09 10:17 AM |
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Cpt2007
A new love!
Member since 1/08 5946 total posts
Name:
Liz
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Re: Is this a little ballsy or is it just me?
only a little? more like a lot. Tacky, totally tacky.
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| Posted 8/13/09 10:20 AM |
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smdl
I love Gary too..on a plate!
Member since 5/06 32461 total posts
Name:
me
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Re: Is this a little ballsy or is it just me?
Posted by irishbaby
Housewarmings IMO are for when you PURCHASE..... a home,apt,condo together.
Yes, in theory but some people will never be able to afford a house and will rent. I think when a couple gets together and merge into 1 place, a housewarming gift is appropriate.
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| Posted 8/13/09 10:20 AM |
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annoyedTTCer
LIF Adult
Member since 4/09 3272 total posts
Name:
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Re: Is this a little ballsy or is it just me?
So tacky
I wouldn't attend the gift grab event
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| Posted 8/13/09 10:21 AM |
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Christine
2nd verse same as the 1st
Member since 5/05 15287 total posts
Name:
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Re: Is this a little ballsy or is it just me?
Posted by smdl
Posted by irishbaby
Housewarmings IMO are for when you PURCHASE..... a home,apt,condo together.
Yes, in theory but some people will never be able to afford a house and will rent. I think when a couple gets together and merge into 1 place, a housewarming gift is appropriate.
I agree. A housewarming party can be for anyone creating a new home - I dont think the status (rental/owned) makes it less of a home for the people that live there. And I think it's nice they want to share that with people they care about.
If the registry was a preliminary bridal registry, I could let that slide but to say gifts are mandatory is downright rude.
Message edited 8/13/2009 10:26:04 AM.
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| Posted 8/13/09 10:25 AM |
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Celt
~~~~~~~~~~
Member since 4/08 7758 total posts
Name:
colette
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Re: Is this a little ballsy or is it just me?
That is the tackiest thing EVER, so in that spirit I'd bring a gift, but make it SUPER TACKY. Something like this
or this:
or this:
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| Posted 8/13/09 10:26 AM |
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annoyedTTCer
LIF Adult
Member since 4/09 3272 total posts
Name:
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Re: Is this a little ballsy or is it just me?
Posted by smdl
Posted by irishbaby
Housewarmings IMO are for when you PURCHASE..... a home,apt,condo together.
Yes, in theory but some people will never be able to afford a house and will rent. I think when a couple gets together and merge into 1 place, a housewarming gift is appropriate.
Then they should wait till they receive gifts for their wedding.
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| Posted 8/13/09 10:35 AM |
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smdl
I love Gary too..on a plate!
Member since 5/06 32461 total posts
Name:
me
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Re: Is this a little ballsy or is it just me?
Posted by annoyedTTCer
Posted by smdl
Posted by irishbaby
Housewarmings IMO are for when you PURCHASE..... a home,apt,condo together.
Yes, in theory but some people will never be able to afford a house and will rent. I think when a couple gets together and merge into 1 place, a housewarming gift is appropriate.
Then they should wait till they receive gifts for their wedding.
A housewarming gift has nothing to do with a wedding.
Some people live together and will never get married.
Also married couples could be married for years and only buy a house after 5+ years. So they don't get a housewarming gift because they had gift at their wedding?
What is inappropriate is for the friend to ask for a gift.
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| Posted 8/13/09 10:39 AM |
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Beth
The Key to your new home....
Member since 2/06 24849 total posts
Name:
Beth
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Re: Is this a little ballsy or is it just me?
Very! I just moved in with my bf- what we didn't have we purchased (or was given to us! Thanks Diana!)
And I will be having a small party when the place is done to show it off and share it with our friends- not for gifts...
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| Posted 8/13/09 10:46 AM |
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dpli
Daylight savings :)
Member since 5/05 13973 total posts
Name:
D
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Re: Is this a little ballsy or is it just me?
I think my parents actually had this clock. It was pretty groovy, circa 1975. 
Tacky. If they are engaged and moving in together because they are getting married, I think it's ridiculous for them to expect gifts. People are most likely planning to give gifts for a shower and then a wedding and that is what they should have set up the registry for, IMO.
I generally bring a bottle of something or a plant for a housewarming gift, and I don't think I have ever been invited to a housewarming party and been given a registry.
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| Posted 8/13/09 10:51 AM |
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tourist
Member since 5/05 10425 total posts
Name:
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Re: Is this a little ballsy or is it just me?
Posted by Beth
Very! I just moved in with my bf- what we didn't have we purchased (or was given to us! Thanks Diana!)
And I will be having a small party when the place is done to show it off and share it with our friends- not for gifts...
According to traditional ettique in books & what not, that is what a housewarming should be, and you are NEVER supposed to register for one.
However, I would never go to one without a gift, but many of my friends had them more than once (first apt, 1st apt with SO, first house, etc) so a gift may just be candles or dish towels or something small like that.
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| Posted 8/13/09 10:57 AM |
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annoyedTTCer
LIF Adult
Member since 4/09 3272 total posts
Name:
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Re: Is this a little ballsy or is it just me?
Posted by smdl
Posted by annoyedTTCer
Posted by smdl
Posted by irishbaby
Housewarmings IMO are for when you PURCHASE..... a home,apt,condo together.
Yes, in theory but some people will never be able to afford a house and will rent. I think when a couple gets together and merge into 1 place, a housewarming gift is appropriate.
Then they should wait till they receive gifts for their wedding.
A housewarming gift has nothing to do with a wedding.
Some people live together and will never get married.
Also married couples could be married for years and only buy a house after 5+ years. So they don't get a housewarming gift because they had gift at their wedding?
What is inappropriate is for the friend to ask for a gift.
Sorry but I think its beyond tacky to register for a housewarming party for an aprtment for a couple that isn't married.
Not everything in life is a gift receiving event
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| Posted 8/13/09 10:59 AM |
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annoyedTTCer
LIF Adult
Member since 4/09 3272 total posts
Name:
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Re: Is this a little ballsy or is it just me?
Posted by Beth
Very! I just moved in with my bf- what we didn't have we purchased (or was given to us! Thanks Diana!)
And I will be having a small party when the place is done to show it off and share it with our friends- not for gifts...
But I'm sure you friends will bring you stuff because they want to, not because you told them to and to make sure its from the list at ABC...
Your way is the right way to go about things
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| Posted 8/13/09 11:01 AM |
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irishbaby
LIF Adolescent
Member since 5/08 582 total posts
Name:
M
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Re: Is this a little ballsy or is it just me?
Listen I lived in a RENTED apartment until I was 12, and then again in my 20's so I am sesitive to a rental being a home.
I also agree that marriage has nothing to do with a housewarming.
But for an engaged couple to move into a rental and make a registry for a "housewarming" party is gross and tacky. That is why ppl are saying to wait for the shower/wedding for the gifts.
I would probably not go to the party but if I did the most they would get is a bottle of wine.
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| Posted 8/13/09 11:02 AM |
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lvdolphins
My Loves!
Member since 5/05 46292 total posts
Name:
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Re: Is this a little ballsy or is it just me?
Very tacky! LOL I prob. would have laughed at her when she said "you better get me a gift"..
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| Posted 8/13/09 11:03 AM |
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eroxgirl
My Loves
Member since 5/05 15697 total posts
Name:
Rebecca
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Re: Is this a little ballsy or is it just me?
Ballsy, tacky, etc... I would have told her so, but my friends know to expect that of me.
I had a housewarming party when I moved into my first apartment.
When people asked me what I wanted I said beer.
My best friend told everyone what I actually needed and liked and I got beautiful gifts - every one of which was a surprise.
Except for the beer.
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| Posted 8/13/09 11:05 AM |
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Cpt2007
A new love!
Member since 1/08 5946 total posts
Name:
Liz
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Re: Is this a little ballsy or is it just me?
Posted by annoyedTTCer
Posted by smdl
Posted by annoyedTTCer
Posted by smdl
Posted by irishbaby
Housewarmings IMO are for when you PURCHASE..... a home,apt,condo together.
Yes, in theory but some people will never be able to afford a house and will rent. I think when a couple gets together and merge into 1 place, a housewarming gift is appropriate.
Then they should wait till they receive gifts for their wedding.
A housewarming gift has nothing to do with a wedding.
Some people live together and will never get married.
Also married couples could be married for years and only buy a house after 5+ years. So they don't get a housewarming gift because they had gift at their wedding?
What is inappropriate is for the friend to ask for a gift.
Sorry but I think its beyond tacky to register for a housewarming party for an aprtment for a couple that isn't married.
Not everything in life is a gift receiving event
I think you guys are on the same page here....
The lack of tact comes in from the friend having registered for a "housewarming." It really has nothing to do with whether they are renting, only engaged, etc. It is against etiquette to register for a housewarming party. Period.
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| Posted 8/13/09 11:05 AM |
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smdl
I love Gary too..on a plate!
Member since 5/06 32461 total posts
Name:
me
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Re: Is this a little ballsy or is it just me?
Posted by annoyedTTCer
Posted by smdl
Posted by annoyedTTCer
Posted by smdl
Posted by irishbaby
Housewarmings IMO are for when you PURCHASE..... a home,apt,condo together.
Yes, in theory but some people will never be able to afford a house and will rent. I think when a couple gets together and merge into 1 place, a housewarming gift is appropriate.
Then they should wait till they receive gifts for their wedding.
A housewarming gift has nothing to do with a wedding.
Some people live together and will never get married.
Also married couples could be married for years and only buy a house after 5+ years. So they don't get a housewarming gift because they had gift at their wedding?
What is inappropriate is for the friend to ask for a gift.
Sorry but I think its beyond tacky to register for a housewarming party for an aprtment for a couple that isn't married.
Not everything in life is a gift receiving event
Yes, I did agree that the request was tacky! I posted that already.
I was quoting another poster who thought that housewarming gifts were for purchase only. I am not sure why you keep quoting my posts as if I agree that she is not tacky!
There is nothing tacky with doing a housewarming gift if a couple goes to a rental place, moves in together.
Doing a registry for a housewarming gift, whether you are getting married OR not is tacky!
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| Posted 8/13/09 11:09 AM |
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