If you throw a classmate party, do you expect siblings to attend?

DH will be working on a weekend where DS#1 is invited to 2 separate parties for classmates on the same day. We are friendly with both families and both families have younger siblings. We have had both of these families over to our home and we know the dads as well.

Would it be terribly rude to ask if I can bring younger DS?

I think they would say yes but I don't want to be rude. At the same time, I think they would understand since they both have 2 children with a similar age gap.

The other option is to ask if I can drop off and see if they offer to let younger DS stay. We know many of the other parents who only have 1 child so I could probably ask another parent to keep an eye on DS.

I would gladly give a double bigger gift if both my children attend.

Message edited 1/23/2013 11:06:30 AM.

If you throw a classmate party, do you expect siblings to attend?

I'm expecting it. These days lots of parents have kids 1-2yrs apart so it sort of goes with the territory.

AJ's school is infant up to 1st grade so there's a lot of afterschool friends she has that have kid bothers and sisters in infant or in grade school but all at the same school. For me its impossible to say no to siblings! LOL

If you throw a classmate party, do you expect siblings to attend?

Is it at a place? Could you just bring younger DS and offer to pay for him separately?

Re: If you throw a classmate party, do you expect siblings to attend?

Re: If you throw a classmate party, do you expect siblings to attend?

No, absolutely do not expect them to attend unless they are invited. I personally think it's even rude to ask, because you are putting the host on the spot.

Re: If you throw a classmate party, do you expect siblings to attend?

Re: If you throw a classmate party, do you expect siblings to attend?

Re: If you throw a classmate party, do you expect siblings to attend?

If you throw a classmate party, do you expect siblings to attend?

i dont think it is rude to ask. they seem to be friendly enough with each other. i would be honest. say your dh is working and you were wondering if it wouldn't be much of an inconvenience to bring ds#2. maybe do it over text that way it won't feel like they are on the spot.

Re: If you throw a classmate party, do you expect siblings to attend?

i would ask if you could drop your child off because you have the younger one with you also and see what they say. some may say ok, others will say to bring your younger child. If it's someone you know pretty well you can be honest with them about the situation and see what they say.

Me personally I always welcome siblings, but not everyone does.

Re: If you throw a classmate party, do you expect siblings to attend?

I would offer to pay the per head cost of bringing your younger DS.

I don't see how that could be viewed as rude.

Re: If you throw a classmate party, do you expect siblings to attend?

I don't - unless it's family, or very good friend (in which case siblings would be included anyway) or the sibling is a baby -

I wouldn't bring Colin (almost 2) with me to Sean's (almost 4) classmate's party unless Colin was specifically invited.

Message edited 1/23/2013 12:29:14 PM.

Re: If you throw a classmate party, do you expect siblings to attend?

Depends on the age of a child, lots of kids came with siblings to DD's party last year, but only the babies - under 2 , I didn't have to pay under 2 so it was fine.
I also took DS to my DD's friends bday party when he was 3 mo old, DH had to work and I had already RSVPd.

If you throw a classmate party, do you expect siblings to attend?

You aren't asking to bring your pet puppy...I don't think it is rude at all.
But I am not in NYC.
josh's friend had a country club birthday for his 6th. I thought nothing of bringing my younger one...a few other younger ones were there as well.
I would never expect a goodie bag, bowling lane, or seat at a cec table-but her standing there? no issue.
now that we are in school-i don't know the families...i think in the card i will put 15.00 to pay for younger one and josh will give gift.
if it is the younger one at gymboree, i will try and leave older one at home-no one wants a huge thug around 2 yr olds

Re: If you throw a classmate party, do you expect siblings to attend?

Re: If you throw a classmate party, do you expect siblings to attend?

My kids are only 17 months so I have not had to deal with this yet. But am i the only mom who would find it rude if someone asked ask me to watch another kid at my party? SURE! ill watch my twins, try to host a party, talk with friends and family, oh AND watch yours too? I rather pay !!

Re: If you throw a classmate party, do you expect siblings to attend?

I went to a classmate party. I left DS home with my husband & explained we cant show up with a sibling it's rude. Which he thought was silly.

I got there and atleast 4-5 kids had younger siblings with them. So now I dont know what to do with the next party (which dh will be away for).


Your scenario is a drop off party ?
If it's a drop off party, why not drop one and keep one with you ?


I didnt care if anyone brought siblings to my daughters party.

But adding another child I have to WATCH would be the rude party to me. Especially since he is younger and will need more attention.

Re: If you throw a classmate party, do you expect siblings to attend?

I don't "expect" them to attend, nor do I want them but it seems like 1 or 2 people always bring a sibling, it's just life.

It's not even the money that's annoying (although I do think it puts the host on the spot, because no gracious host is going to take that money or refuse to let the sibling come). It's the fact that the sibling is often the wrong age for the activity/venue and a uninvited toddler trying to "join in" can be a nuisance on your kid's special day.

Re: If you throw a classmate party, do you expect siblings to attend?

I ask and always offer to pay for the extra child. It is usually not an issue.

Re: If you throw a classmate party, do you expect siblings to attend?

We've never brought an uninvited sibling and used to think it was quite rude but it happens often... I kind of get it, parents with more than 1 child don't always have an option...

I think it's perfectly fine to call ahead and explain your situation.

If you throw a classmate party, do you expect siblings to attend?

Posted by computergirl

I don't "expect" them to attend, nor do I want them but it seems like 1 or 2 people always bring a sibling, it's just life.

It's not even the money that's annoying (although I do think it puts the host on the spot, because no gracious host is going to take that money or refuse to let the sibling come). It's the fact that the sibling is often the wrong age for the activity/venue and a uninvited toddler trying to "join in" can be a nuisance on your kid's special day.

Re: If you throw a classmate party, do you expect siblings to attend?

I actually think it is very rude to ask because you put the host on the spot and I would never feel comfortable taking money from a guest. I think infants are one thing but many places charge any child walking etc. DH works very long hours and often weekends. I have had to say no to parties before bc I didn't have a sitter. I would say no before I would put someone on the spot. I disagree that asking by text is less on the spot. If this is someone who knows you very well they will know your situation. Maybe they will ask you why you can't attend. I turned a party down for that reason and the mom asked if it was bc I had my other DD and insisted I bring her.

I know when we do parties I want everyone to have a cupcake and favor. I knew one or two have to bring their kids so I invited the siblings since having the child was important to my DD.

When a party is at a home it is easier when people show with siblings but at a place yes there are additional charges but some places also have maximum numbers and can only fit a certain amount of kids.

If you throw a classmate party, do you expect siblings to attend?

what kind of places are we talking?
unless someone is renting out the entire place...it is still open to the public.
cec, bouncehouses, movies, bowling. i just go and pay for my extra kid at counter.
if it is gymboree or something-feel out the host.

country club, house, yard, park...i would make sure it is a nice gift

Message edited 1/23/2013 5:02:56 PM.

Re: If you throw a classmate party, do you expect siblings to attend?

Re: If you throw a classmate party, do you expect siblings to attend?

Message edited 1/23/2013 8:06:03 PM.