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brassmunky
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Member since 6/08 1163 total posts
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I need a nice way of saying this...
how would you tell your daycare provider to stop giving your kid "junk" food without sounding rude, or judgmental?
sebastian just started daycare and they give the kids there regular milk and muffins & cookies and all those processed puffs and treats. i am not dead set against them, but when sebs is hungry, i rather give him fresh fruit & veggies and organic milk, especially since he enjoys them. so i was having a hard time coming up with the words to advise the daycare provider to please give sebastian food i provide and not what she does, without sounding rude or ungrateful. she has mentioned in her "handbook" that she does not encourage parents to bring in different foods from what she gives because then the other kids will want it...i think it even reads that if we do decide to do this, bring enough for everyone...not sure...
so, i needed to write her a note stating my child is only to be given organic milk, like there was something wrong with that. it even tastes better, in my opinion, but that's besides the point.
she sends him home with a list of his activities, including what he ate that day, and when i saw muffins & cookies, i was a bit concerned. how do i tell her not to do that? so then i thought i'd ask her what KIND of cookies & muffins are we talking....
well, sebastian had an irregular poopie diapie, so i'm pretty sure the culprit is her cookies & muffins. he's pretty regular, so this was telling...maybe
i called her today and asked - she said she "makes" the muffins and the cookies were like the ones made for kids. and she tried reassuring me that this "food-program" she's a part of allows this, and that he liked it and would be fine. but she also mentioned that this "food-program" allows for a cup of natural juice a day, which i'm not comfortable giving sebastian, which she also knows and adheres to with no problem. i don't think juice is bad, but there are a lot of weight issues in my family, and now diabetes, so if i can have him love the agua more, i'm going to try my best.
perhaps when i go pick him up today, i'll mention my family health concerns with her, then maybe she'll be more open to giving sebs his mama-made snacks.
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Posted 2/9/11 1:33 PM  |
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headoverheels
s'il vous plaît
Member since 6/07 42079 total posts
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LB
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Re: I need a nice way of saying this...
If it's bothering his stomach then that's a genuine health concern. I would word it that way - that you are only looking out for your son, and he's not used to foods like that, so you'd prefer that he drink organic milk and eat XYZ - but I am assuming that you are fully prepared to buy that stuff for him, cut it up, and send it in to daycare with him right? You're not expecting her to provide it?
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| Posted 2/9/11 1:36 PM |
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DRMom
Two in Blue
Member since 5/05 20223 total posts
Name:
Melissa
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Re: I need a nice way of saying this...
I feel strongly about organic healthy food for my boys which is why I chose a pre-school that lets us bring our own food. Probably I would just insist or find another school and make that determination up front. In addition one of my sons has allergies and cannot have the food they serve
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| Posted 2/9/11 1:37 PM |
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Ian&EmmesMommy23
My family is complete!
Member since 11/08 12970 total posts
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Diana
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Re: I need a nice way of saying this...
im going through the same thing! my daycare gives Fruit Loops and Cinnamon Toast Crunch for breakfast. I have no idea if i'm the only parent there who's not happy about this. I dont know how to approach this with the director.
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| Posted 2/9/11 1:38 PM |
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brassmunky
LIF Adult
Member since 6/08 1163 total posts
Name:
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Re: I need a nice way of saying this...
Posted by headoverheels
If it's bothering his stomach then that's a genuine health concern. I would word it that way - that you are only looking out for your son, and he's not used to foods like that, so you'd prefer that he drink organic milk and eat XYZ - but I am assuming that you are fully prepared to buy that stuff for him, cut it up, and send it in to daycare with him right? You're not expecting her to provide it?
yes, i already have. send it with him i mean. and when i called today during snack time, she said he was eating muffins again.
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| Posted 2/9/11 1:38 PM |
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Daisy32
Mommy
Member since 2/08 8081 total posts
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Re: I need a nice way of saying this...
I would mention the family health history. To be quite honest I dont think it would be rude at all to tell her that at snack time you'd prefer that your child be given the fruit and milk that you've provided. The idea of "providing" what you bring for YOUR child for the whole class is lunacy in my opinion. He's your kid and you should have all say in what he eats.
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| Posted 2/9/11 1:39 PM |
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headoverheels
s'il vous plaît
Member since 6/07 42079 total posts
Name:
LB
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Re: I need a nice way of saying this...
Posted by dewdrop
Posted by headoverheels
If it's bothering his stomach then that's a genuine health concern. I would word it that way - that you are only looking out for your son, and he's not used to foods like that, so you'd prefer that he drink organic milk and eat XYZ - but I am assuming that you are fully prepared to buy that stuff for him, cut it up, and send it in to daycare with him right? You're not expecting her to provide it?
yes, i already have. send it with him i mean. and when i called today during snack time, she said he was eating muffins again.
Wow. I think that is SO rude of her! You are sending him in with food and she is letting it go to waste and giving him junk? I'd have a big, big problem with this.
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| Posted 2/9/11 1:40 PM |
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LoriH
There's no place like home
Member since 8/07 4110 total posts
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Lori
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Re: I need a nice way of saying this...
Posted by dewdrop
. she has mentioned in her "handbook" that she does not encourage parents to bring in different foods from what she gives because then the other kids will want it...i think it even reads that if we do decide to do this, bring enough for everyone...not sure...
I may be in the minority but if this is how the daycare runs and it is in her handbook, I think that you may just have to find a new program. If you have already mentioned it and it is still going on, I would start looking elsewhere. It is obviously very important to you that you child folows a healthier diet, so I would find a provider who will support it.
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| Posted 2/9/11 1:49 PM |
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Ophelia
she's baaccckkkk ;)
Member since 5/06 23378 total posts
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remember, when Gulliver traveled....
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Re: I need a nice way of saying this...
Posted by LoriH
Posted by dewdrop
. she has mentioned in her "handbook" that she does not encourage parents to bring in different foods from what she gives because then the other kids will want it...i think it even reads that if we do decide to do this, bring enough for everyone...not sure...
I may be in the minority but if this is how the daycare runs and it is in her handbook, I think that you may just have to find a new program. If you have already mentioned it and it is still going on, I would start looking elsewhere. It is obviously very important to you that you child folows a healthier diet, so I would find a provider who will support it.
I agree with this.
first of all, you already told her about the muffins...yet he's eating muffins when you call.
strike 1. or 2. or whatever we are up to.
I would look for another place that allows you to send food. these food programs are hot messes anyway. their guidelines are terrible. no thanks.
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| Posted 2/9/11 1:53 PM |
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brassmunky
LIF Adult
Member since 6/08 1163 total posts
Name:
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Re: I need a nice way of saying this...
Posted by Ophelia
Posted by LoriH
Posted by dewdrop
. she has mentioned in her "handbook" that she does not encourage parents to bring in different foods from what she gives because then the other kids will want it...i think it even reads that if we do decide to do this, bring enough for everyone...not sure...
I may be in the minority but if this is how the daycare runs and it is in her handbook, I think that you may just have to find a new program. If you have already mentioned it and it is still going on, I would start looking elsewhere. It is obviously very important to you that you child folows a healthier diet, so I would find a provider who will support it.
I agree with this.
first of all, you already told her about the muffins...yet he's eating muffins when you call.
strike 1. or 2. or whatever we are up to.
I would look for another place that allows you to send food. these food programs are hot messes anyway. their guidelines are terrible. no thanks.
yep, i was afraid of this...
i have no idea what this food program is, and honestly thought it wouldn't be a big deal to send him with his own snacky-snacks.
it was tough finding a lady who i "clicked" with, so i have some stuff to reconsider.
edited for placement
Message edited 2/9/2011 1:58:22 PM.
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| Posted 2/9/11 1:56 PM |
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Bops
My 3 wishes
Member since 12/07 13625 total posts
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Re: I need a nice way of saying this...
Is this an at home daycare program ?
The reason I ask is because if she participates in the CACFP ( Child & Adult Care Food Program) , we ( I am a licensed in-home provider myself) are not "allowed" for parents to provide any meal components , with the exception of infant formula or breast milk...
She is required to provide and submit on a monthly basis, the menu that was served to the CACFP in order to get partial reimbursement ...
Though we are "allowed" to give the occasional sweets, it is frowned upon on a daily basis...We also have monitors that stop in to observe mealtimes ....
I have been out of the circuit for a bit
( since I am on an extended maternity leave) , but am still licensed- Not sure if anything has changed in regard to providing organic milk to children ( as this has become bigger in the last few years)
If the "program" she is referring to is the CACFP, here is a link that may help you ..If not, sorry for my ramblings- LOL
http://www.fns.usda.gov/cnd/care/
and a copy of the menu requirements:
http://www.fns.usda.gov/cnd/care/ProgramBasics/Meals/Meal_Patterns.htm
Message edited 2/9/2011 1:59:57 PM.
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| Posted 2/9/11 1:58 PM |
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brassmunky
LIF Adult
Member since 6/08 1163 total posts
Name:
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Re: I need a nice way of saying this...
Posted by Bops
Is this an at home daycare program ?
The reason I ask is because if she participates in the CACFP ( Child & Adult Care Food Program) , we ( I am a licensed in-home provider myself) are not "allowed" for parents to provide any meal components , with the exception of infant formula or breast milk...
She is required to provide and submit on a monthly basis, the menu that was served to the CACFP in order to get partial reimbursement ...
Though we are "allowed" to give the occasional sweets, it is frowned upon on a daily basis...We also have monitors that stop in to observe mealtimes ....
I have been out of the circuit for a bit
( since I am on an extended maternity leave) , but am still licensed- Not sure if anything has changed in regard to providing organic milk to children ( as this has become bigger in the last few years)
If the "program" she is referring to is the CACFP, here is a link that may help you ..If not, sorry for my ramblings- LOL
http://www.fns.usda.gov/cnd/care/
not at all. thanks so much! and yes, she's an IHDP
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| Posted 2/9/11 2:00 PM |
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Bridex100
Two Under Two Mommy
Member since 3/08 10420 total posts
Name:
Momx100
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Re: I need a nice way of saying this...
Posted by LoriH
Posted by dewdrop
. she has mentioned in her "handbook" that she does not encourage parents to bring in different foods from what she gives because then the other kids will want it...i think it even reads that if we do decide to do this, bring enough for everyone...not sure...
I may be in the minority but if this is how the daycare runs and it is in her handbook, I think that you may just have to find a new program. If you have already mentioned it and it is still going on, I would start looking elsewhere. It is obviously very important to you that you child folows a healthier diet, so I would find a provider who will support it.
I agree. This is the way her daycare is run. You may need to find another daycare.
I haven't looked into daycare for a while but most of the ones I visited said they offered snacks but we could also bring our own. I don't see why it's so difficult for her to give your DS what you packed him.
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| Posted 2/9/11 2:01 PM |
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Linda1003
love my 2 boys
Member since 8/08 10923 total posts
Name:
Linda
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Re: I need a nice way of saying this...
Tutor Time doesn't allow outside food either..however.. they have healthier choices...if they are serving Jello for snack.. I ask that he gets..yogurt.. goldfish.. (not a fan of the articial color).
If they have pudding...he gets yogurt...
they MUST have better options at the very least.
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| Posted 2/9/11 2:02 PM |
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MarisaK
HELLO Manolo !!
Member since 5/06 14562 total posts
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Marisa
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Re: I need a nice way of saying this...
You probably need to find a place that lets you send his food with him -
You have every right to feed your kid what ever you think is appropriate for him -
I also prefer my son to eat fresh fruit over cookies - which is why I give him fruit over cookies at home - I know @ daycare it's kind of whatever they give him type of deal .......
But you also have to consider the fact that he IS in a 'school' type setting and he's NOT the only kid in the class - in her defense, I have been in Sean's daycare room during 'meal' time - it's complete chaos trying to get all of those kids to sit down w/ each other, get their food and drinks on the table to them - and get them to eat together - I don't know how old your son is, but I can see how it would be extremely difficult to get one kid one thing, another something else - then this one wants what that one is eating etc etc ..........
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| Posted 2/9/11 2:09 PM |
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brassmunky
LIF Adult
Member since 6/08 1163 total posts
Name:
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Re: I need a nice way of saying this...
Posted by MarisaK
You probably need to find a place that lets you send his food with him -
You have every right to feed your kid what ever you think is appropriate for him -
I also prefer my son to eat fresh fruit over cookies - which is why I give him fruit over cookies at home - I know @ daycare it's kind of whatever they give him type of deal .......
But you also have to consider the fact that he IS in a 'school' type setting and he's NOT the only kid in the class - in her defense, I have been in Sean's daycare room during 'meal' time - it's complete chaos trying to get all of those kids to sit down w/ each other, get their food and drinks on the table to them - and get them to eat together - I don't know how old your son is, but I can see how it would be extremely difficult to get one kid one thing, another something else - then this one wants what that one is eating etc etc ..........
yea, i thought about that. and i totally see your point.
he's 11 months, going on 18 months :)
and then i think, there are a few kids of varying age groups that require different meals at their stage. so i thought it'd be all the same to give my kid his homemade snacks.
reading this menu...doesn't seem too-too bad. i mean, it's not keebler cookies.
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| Posted 2/9/11 2:16 PM |
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MarisaK
HELLO Manolo !!
Member since 5/06 14562 total posts
Name:
Marisa
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Re: I need a nice way of saying this...
Posted by dewdrop
Posted by MarisaK
You probably need to find a place that lets you send his food with him -
You have every right to feed your kid what ever you think is appropriate for him -
I also prefer my son to eat fresh fruit over cookies - which is why I give him fruit over cookies at home - I know @ daycare it's kind of whatever they give him type of deal .......
But you also have to consider the fact that he IS in a 'school' type setting and he's NOT the only kid in the class - in her defense, I have been in Sean's daycare room during 'meal' time - it's complete chaos trying to get all of those kids to sit down w/ each other, get their food and drinks on the table to them - and get them to eat together - I don't know how old your son is, but I can see how it would be extremely difficult to get one kid one thing, another something else - then this one wants what that one is eating etc etc ..........
yea, i thought about that. and i totally see your point.
he's 11 months, going on 18 months :)
and then i think, there are a few kids of varying age groups that require different meals at their stage. so i thought it'd be all the same to give my kid his homemade snacks.
reading this menu...doesn't seem too-too bad. i mean, it's not keebler cookies.
Eh..........wait one sec. I may be more of your advocate now that the teacher  
if the kids are varying ages, they're not eating the same things at teh same times etc etc (a 3 year old isn't eating the same as an 11 month old) so then there's no reason why she can't give him your food -
And if she COULDN'T legally give him 'outside' food b/c of the program she belongs to, she should have made that very clear to you from day 1
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| Posted 2/9/11 2:20 PM |
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brassmunky
LIF Adult
Member since 6/08 1163 total posts
Name:
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Re: I need a nice way of saying this...
Posted by MarisaK
And if she COULDN'T legally give him 'outside' food b/c of the program she belongs to, she should have made that very clear to you from day 1
hmm, yeah, that's interesting. i didn't know that. come to think of it, there have a few instances where she's come across...dismissively? for instances, i brought my mom with me for a visit prior to enrolling him, and she noted to the daycare provider that there was paint clearly chipping from a toy shelf. she said it would be repaired that weekend, which was last weekend, but it hasn't.
i dunno...it was so hard finding this lady, and sebs seems to really like her. i can put it off another month, but he seems to be thriving socially... tough call.
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| Posted 2/9/11 2:38 PM |
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Xelindrya
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Member since 8/05 14470 total posts
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Veronica
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Re: I need a nice way of saying this...
Posted by headoverheels
Posted by dewdrop
Posted by headoverheels
If it's bothering his stomach then that's a genuine health concern. I would word it that way - that you are only looking out for your son, and he's not used to foods like that, so you'd prefer that he drink organic milk and eat XYZ - but I am assuming that you are fully prepared to buy that stuff for him, cut it up, and send it in to daycare with him right? You're not expecting her to provide it?
yes, i already have. send it with him i mean. and when i called today during snack time, she said he was eating muffins again.
Wow. I think that is SO rude of her! You are sending him in with food and she is letting it go to waste and giving him junk? I'd have a big, big problem with this.
ITA
That's rude. Hrm. don't know if wording it is going to make it any better though. 
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| Posted 2/9/11 2:49 PM |
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brassmunky
LIF Adult
Member since 6/08 1163 total posts
Name:
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Re: I need a nice way of saying this...
Posted by Xelindrya
ITA
That's rude. Hrm. don't know if wording it is going to make it any better though.
beginning to think so too...
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| Posted 2/9/11 2:51 PM |
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josie919
Here we go!
Member since 2/08 1108 total posts
Name:
Josie
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Re: I need a nice way of saying this...
I may be in the minority but if this is how the daycare runs and it is in her handbook, I think that you may just have to find a new program. If you have already mentioned it and it is still going on, I would start looking elsewhere. It is obviously very important to you that you child folows a healthier diet, so I would find a provider who will support it.
I agree with you. I understand why she doesnt want people bringing in outside foods. My daughter is in a daycare center and I would be annoyed if another Mom was bringing in her own meals against policy bc of my daughters allergies. Kids like to share- if you child handed a piece of (whatever) to a child that was allergic, that's a problem.Not that this is her reasoning, but it could be a reason she chooses not to have food brought in. And yes, other kids may want the food that your DC has vs what is being served by the provider. Not fair to the others. I would suggest finding a provider who is on the same path as you with the organics and healthy snacks. I didnt read ALL of the responses, but do we know what kind of muffins/cookies they are eating? All muffins and cookies are not unhealthy. The milk thing should be a non-issue. If he has a problem with reg. milk then he needs the organic. Sorry you are having a hard time. I would say just be honest with her and see where it goes from there. Good luck!
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| Posted 2/9/11 2:56 PM |
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brassmunky
LIF Adult
Member since 6/08 1163 total posts
Name:
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Re: I need a nice way of saying this...
Posted by josie919
I may be in the minority but if this is how the daycare runs and it is in her handbook, I think that you may just have to find a new program. If you have already mentioned it and it is still going on, I would start looking elsewhere. It is obviously very important to you that you child folows a healthier diet, so I would find a provider who will support it.
I agree with you. I understand why she doesnt want people bringing in outside foods. My daughter is in a daycare center and I would be annoyed if another Mom was bringing in her own meals against policy bc of my daughters allergies. Kids like to share- if you child handed a piece of (whatever) to a child that was allergic, that's a problem.Not that this is her reasoning, but it could be a reason she chooses not to have food brought in. And yes, other kids may want the food that your DC has vs what is being served by the provider. Not fair to the others. I would suggest finding a provider who is on the same path as you with the organics and healthy snacks. I didnt read ALL of the responses, but do we know what kind of muffins/cookies they are eating? All muffins and cookies are not unhealthy. The milk thing should be a non-issue. If he has a problem with reg. milk then he needs the organic. Sorry you are having a hard time. I would say just be honest with her and see where it goes from there. Good luck!
thanks! i am going to be honest with her and take it from there. and you're right, muffins and the cookies she's giving aren't awful...muffins are homemade and the cookies are the kids-type, like the puffs.
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| Posted 2/9/11 3:04 PM |
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Bops
My 3 wishes
Member since 12/07 13625 total posts
Name:
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Re: I need a nice way of saying this...
I have an ironic different spin on your dilemma 
One of the daycare boys I cared for (well he and his baby brother) used to be the 1st ones in everyday....
For the first 2 weeks after I started caring for them, the dad religiously stopped at 7-11 and picked his older DS up a Yahoo and sprinkle donut in the morning 
I was in the same situation as you but in the reverse !...I had to find a way to gently tell the father that unfortunately due to being in the food program, he could not bring in his own breakfast foods...(Not to mention, here I am giving the other kids waffles and blueberries and this boy is eating a sprinkle donut ) I told him he was free to give it to him on the way to my home, but he was not able to bring it in...Father looked at me like I had 2 heads and then finally it clicked- or at least I hope so, because he stopped
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| Posted 2/9/11 3:06 PM |
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Ophelia
she's baaccckkkk ;)
Member since 5/06 23378 total posts
Name:
remember, when Gulliver traveled....
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Re: I need a nice way of saying this...
now I am starting to think it's a reimbursement issue. could that be it? that the program won't reimburse her for your son if you are sending in food?
is that also why she makes them herself?
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| Posted 2/9/11 3:16 PM |
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DancinBarefoot
06ers Rock!!
Member since 1/07 9537 total posts
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The One My Mother Gave Me ;-)
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Re: I need a nice way of saying this...
One of the reasons I didn't send my DD to Tutor Time was because I couldn't bring in my own food. I read their menu, and while all the food groups were represented, I didn't want my 18 month old eating bologna.
I have my DD at a center that provides snacks but not meals, and permits parents to provide their own snacks if they chose. Everyday I send DD w/ organic yogurt and fresh fruit (or applesauce if I don't have fruit for some reason) and an organic lunch. If I send cookies, I send organic cookies etc.
I would tell the provider you want your child to eat the food you provide <period>.
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| Posted 2/9/11 3:27 PM |
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