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MetsGirl07
LIF O2 Vendor
Member since 12/07 16202 total posts
Name:
Deanna
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how do you find ways to not put pressure on yourselves?
i am really at a loss here.. i was so upset all weekend while having AF  and really trying to think about ways to not get crazy with TTC, pressure, stress, anything!
the reason im asking because i still want to BD on the right days, but how can you still do that without feeling pressured, or anything else for that matter..
i hope i am making sense,, i am a little out of it still.. just so dissapointed. 
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Posted 8/25/08 10:39 AM  |
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Long Island Weddings
Long Island's Largest Bridal Resource |
IrishLasss334
I'll be there soon!
Member since 1/08 6549 total posts
Name:
Patty
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Re: how do you find ways to not put pressure on yourselves?
I am redecorating another room in my house...home renovation, painting, etc. is a huge distraction for me.
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| Posted 8/25/08 10:41 AM |
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Angel321
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Member since 4/08 15553 total posts
Name:
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Re: how do you find ways to not put pressure on yourselves?
if there is a way - i have no idea. we had a very bad weekend.
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| Posted 8/25/08 10:46 AM |
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EricaAlt
LIF Adult
Member since 7/08 22665 total posts
Name:
Erica
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Re: how do you find ways to not put pressure on yourselves?
I hear ya... I was going through a bad time myself a couple of months ago. I wasn't pregnant, my older sister just gave birth to her 4th child and this is a first for her 2nd marriage and my co. was laying off some people... I just had to focus b/c I knew the more stress I have the less chance for pregnany. Try planning a weekend vacation, go away, go on a nice date in the city... just enjoy each other. DH and I are planning a trip in Sept to a B&B in VT. Plus, we just bought a new car. Now when AF shows up I'll go do something for myself that you can't pregnant... drink some wine, get my hair highlighted, etc.
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| Posted 8/25/08 10:51 AM |
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MetsGirl07
LIF O2 Vendor
Member since 12/07 16202 total posts
Name:
Deanna
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Re: how do you find ways to not put pressure on yourselves?
Posted by davenjess
if there is a way - i have no idea. we had a very bad weekend.
what happeened? why did you have a bad weekend?
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| Posted 8/25/08 10:59 AM |
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MetsGirl07
LIF O2 Vendor
Member since 12/07 16202 total posts
Name:
Deanna
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Re: how do you find ways to not put pressure on yourselves?
Posted by IrishLass
I am redecorating another room in my house...home renovation, painting, etc. is a huge distraction for me.
thats a good idea.. maybe i should work on a new project in my house as a distraction.. im sure there is something!!
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| Posted 8/25/08 10:59 AM |
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MetsGirl07
LIF O2 Vendor
Member since 12/07 16202 total posts
Name:
Deanna
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Re: how do you find ways to not put pressure on yourselves?
Posted by EricaAlt
I hear ya... I was going through a bad time myself a couple of months ago. I wasn't pregnant, my older sister just gave birth to her 4th child and this is a first for her 2nd marriage and my co. was laying off some people... I just had to focus b/c I knew the more stress I have the less chance for pregnany. Try planning a weekend vacation, go away, go on a nice date in the city... just enjoy each other. DH and I are planning a trip in Sept to a B&B in VT. Plus, we just bought a new car. Now when AF shows up I'll go do something for myself that you can't pregnant... drink some wine, get my hair highlighted, etc.
yea i feel the same way.. the stress is the worst , i have to be distracted.. and my job doesnt help.. i sit at a desk all day on LIF.. lol
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| Posted 8/25/08 11:00 AM |
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Angel321
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Member since 4/08 15553 total posts
Name:
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Re: how do you find ways to not put pressure on yourselves?
Posted by MetsGirl07
Posted by davenjess
if there is a way - i have no idea. we had a very bad weekend.
what happeened? why did you have a bad weekend?
oing + pressure = no completion = frustration = anger = crying
real fun stuff
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| Posted 8/25/08 11:01 AM |
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MetsGirl07
LIF O2 Vendor
Member since 12/07 16202 total posts
Name:
Deanna
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Re: how do you find ways to not put pressure on yourselves?
Posted by davenjess
Posted by MetsGirl07
Posted by davenjess
if there is a way - i have no idea. we had a very bad weekend.
what happeened? why did you have a bad weekend?
oing + pressure = no completion = frustration = anger = crying
real fun stuff
see, thats what my problem is too! and this is why i made the thread!!
last month we missed crucial days too because my husband felt pressured and couldnt perform.. i know i was going to not let him know when i O. but i have a feeling he will know anyways..
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| Posted 8/25/08 11:03 AM |
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EricaAlt
LIF Adult
Member since 7/08 22665 total posts
Name:
Erica
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Re: how do you find ways to not put pressure on yourselves?
I hate to say it and it may be TMI or some girls are weirded out by it... but we sometimes watch a porn movie. I mean... it gets us in the mood and all so why not. Takes the frustration away. 
Not that I ever want to tell my child in the future they were conceived while mom and dad were watching "Dirty Sluts" or something. LOL!
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| Posted 8/25/08 11:19 AM |
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MetsGirl07
LIF O2 Vendor
Member since 12/07 16202 total posts
Name:
Deanna
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Re: how do you find ways to not put pressure on yourselves?
Posted by EricaAlt
I hate to say it and it may be TMI or some girls are weirded out by it... but we sometimes watch a porn movie. I mean... it gets us in the mood and all so why not. Takes the frustration away.
Not that I ever want to tell my child in the future they were conceived while mom and dad were watching "Dirty Sluts" or something. LOL!
i love that last line.. haha
yea it did cross my mind.. it will make it easier , im sure of it.. im sure DH will be ok with that could be a possibility
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| Posted 8/25/08 11:21 AM |
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maybeamommy
Blessed beyond belief
Member since 10/07 17048 total posts
Name:
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Re: how do you find ways to not put pressure on yourselves?
I wish I had advice for you, but we are dealing with the same thing that Jess is.
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| Posted 8/25/08 11:22 AM |
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JennyPenny
?
Member since 1/08 12702 total posts
Name:
Jen
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Re: how do you find ways to not put pressure on yourselves?
Posted by EricaAlt
Not that I ever want to tell my child in the future they were conceived while mom and dad were watching "Dirty Sluts" or something. LOL!
I used to have a major issue with patience and the TWW and waiting to O and pushing DH to BD at the exact right time. It was stressful and I was miserable and he had the same issue once.
That's when I finally started planning our wedding, and took a break TTC because I wanted to really enjoy myself at the wedding.
I feel like I can be more patient now that I had a chance to relieve some of the pressure. I'm really nervous once I take the trigger shot, though, that DH will "malfunction". I think I will die of a stroke if that happens.
 
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| Posted 8/25/08 11:27 AM |
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EricaAlt
LIF Adult
Member since 7/08 22665 total posts
Name:
Erica
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Re: how do you find ways to not put pressure on yourselves?
Posted by MetsGirl07
Posted by EricaAlt
I hate to say it and it may be TMI or some girls are weirded out by it... but we sometimes watch a porn movie. I mean... it gets us in the mood and all so why not. Takes the frustration away.
Not that I ever want to tell my child in the future they were conceived while mom and dad were watching "Dirty Sluts" or something. LOL!
i love that last line.. haha
yea it did cross my mind.. it will make it easier , im sure of it.. im sure DH will be ok with that could be a possibility
Honestly... it works and DH won't mind at all. Heck, whatever gets the job done. 
I'll just remember never to name my child Harley, Jenna, Tommy Cockers or anything like that.
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| Posted 8/25/08 11:28 AM |
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MetsGirl07
LIF O2 Vendor
Member since 12/07 16202 total posts
Name:
Deanna
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Re: how do you find ways to not put pressure on yourselves?
i asked DH if we can have another wedding i know the planning is crazy and is a GREAT distraction.. i was kidding of course, but at the same time not so much..lol
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| Posted 8/25/08 11:29 AM |
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MetsGirl07
LIF O2 Vendor
Member since 12/07 16202 total posts
Name:
Deanna
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Re: how do you find ways to not put pressure on yourselves?
Posted by EricaAlt
Posted by MetsGirl07
Posted by EricaAlt
I hate to say it and it may be TMI or some girls are weirded out by it... but we sometimes watch a porn movie. I mean... it gets us in the mood and all so why not. Takes the frustration away.
Not that I ever want to tell my child in the future they were conceived while mom and dad were watching "Dirty Sluts" or something. LOL!
i love that last line.. haha
yea it did cross my mind.. it will make it easier , im sure of it.. im sure DH will be ok with that could be a possibility
Honestly... it works and DH won't mind at all. Heck, whatever gets the job done.
I'll just remember never to name my child Harley, Jenna, Tommy Cockers or anything like that.
HAHA!
the funny part is.. i always liked the name Jenna,, and DH just looked at me and thought i was crazy.. i didnt get it at first.. took a minute to register..lol
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| Posted 8/25/08 11:31 AM |
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MetsGirl07
LIF O2 Vendor
Member since 12/07 16202 total posts
Name:
Deanna
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Re: how do you find ways to not put pressure on yourselves?
Posted by maybeamommy
I wish I had advice for you, but we are dealing with the same thing that Jess is.
i guess im in this category now too
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| Posted 8/25/08 11:31 AM |
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maybebaby
LIF Adult
Member since 11/05 6870 total posts
Name:
Maureen
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Re: how do you find ways to not put pressure on yourselves?
Posted by MetsGirl07
Posted by davenjess
Posted by MetsGirl07
Posted by davenjess
if there is a way - i have no idea. we had a very bad weekend.
what happeened? why did you have a bad weekend?
oing + pressure = no completion = frustration = anger = crying
real fun stuff
see, thats what my problem is too! and this is why i made the thread!!
last month we missed crucial days too because my husband felt pressured and couldnt perform.. i know i was going to not let him know when i O. but i have a feeling he will know anyways..
OMG This happened to us too!!!! Because we talked extensively about trying in august, he was not his "usual" self.
It was awful. I was upset thinking it was me, he assured me it wasn't...
It's funny because when we tried with my first there was zero pressure. We were just married, thought it would take a lot of time, never told him when i was o'ing...and no problems. This time around? For some reason he is so worried/anxious etc...
So I can relate!!!
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| Posted 8/25/08 11:41 AM |
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maybebaby
LIF Adult
Member since 11/05 6870 total posts
Name:
Maureen
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Re: how do you find ways to not put pressure on yourselves?
Wanted to add...
ALCOHOL. A few drinks helps. Not to get "sloppy" drunk but just enough to relax. You don't want your DH overdoing it on the beers, lol...
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| Posted 8/25/08 11:44 AM |
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EricaAlt
LIF Adult
Member since 7/08 22665 total posts
Name:
Erica
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Re: how do you find ways to not put pressure on yourselves?
Posted by maybebaby
Wanted to add...
ALCOHOL. A few drinks helps. Not to get "sloppy" drunk but just enough to relax. You don't want your DH overdoing it on the beers, lol...
Make it like a date night... nice dinner, some wine... etc.
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| Posted 8/25/08 11:47 AM |
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Angel321
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Member since 4/08 15553 total posts
Name:
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Re: how do you find ways to not put pressure on yourselves?
he knew without me saying anything that i am o'ing...as i (prepare for overshare) - get VERY moist in that region at that time...and he says he can't feel anything and get any friction...hence the failure to complete.
i'm on the verge of tears today, real bad, i'm afraid if anyone here asks how my weekend was, i'll burst into tears...
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| Posted 8/25/08 11:47 AM |
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MetsGirl07
LIF O2 Vendor
Member since 12/07 16202 total posts
Name:
Deanna
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Re: how do you find ways to not put pressure on yourselves?
Posted by EricaAlt
Posted by maybebaby
Wanted to add...
ALCOHOL. A few drinks helps. Not to get "sloppy" drunk but just enough to relax. You don't want your DH overdoing it on the beers, lol...
Make it like a date night... nice dinner, some wine... etc.
yea i was thinking this can be a possibility too! 
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| Posted 8/25/08 11:49 AM |
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MetsGirl07
LIF O2 Vendor
Member since 12/07 16202 total posts
Name:
Deanna
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Re: how do you find ways to not put pressure on yourselves?
Posted by davenjess
he knew without me saying anything that i am o'ing...as i (prepare for overshare) - get VERY moist in that region at that time...and he says he can't feel anything and get any friction...hence the failure to complete.
i'm on the verge of tears today, real bad, i'm afraid if anyone here asks how my weekend was, i'll burst into tears...
oh sweetie.. we are all here for you.. i know how frustrating all this is.. believe me!! i wish i can make you feel better.. please let me know if there is anything i can do!! love you 
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| Posted 8/25/08 11:52 AM |
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Angel321
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Member since 4/08 15553 total posts
Name:
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Re: how do you find ways to not put pressure on yourselves?
love you 2
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| Posted 8/25/08 11:56 AM |
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BellaRock
I am all the Me I will ever Be
Member since 5/06 9746 total posts
Name:
She who shall remain nameless
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Re: how do you find ways to not put pressure on yourselves?
Posted by davenjess
he knew without me saying anything that i am o'ing...as i (prepare for overshare) - get VERY moist in that region at that time...and he says he can't feel anything and get any friction...hence the failure to complete.
i'm on the verge of tears today, real bad, i'm afraid if anyone here asks how my weekend was, i'll burst into tears...
I am so sorry that you have to go through this. I know how hard it is. We are here for you. I hope you start to feel better soon.
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| Posted 8/25/08 12:02 PM |
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