Grandparents

How often do your children's grandparents babysit them?

My MIL has babysat twice, once because we had to go to a wedding and once to go out for DH's birthday. One of the times she let DD sleep until 9pm and she proceeded to stay up all night so no one slept. Petty, but worth mentioning since she only really "babysat" for an hour.

My FIL has also babysat twice- once for us to go out for my birthday and once for us to go house hunting solo.

My parents have never babysat.

DD is 2.

Grandparents

My daughter is 11 and I don't think I had anyone babysit her until she was 3ish. Even now it is only once or twice a year. DH is home if I need to go out and vise versa. We prefer to go out as a family. Although my sister has my parents babysit at least once a every other week.

Grandparents

My parents babysit maybe 3-4x per year. My in laws more like 6-7x per year.
My parents have a lot of grandchildren other than mine. My DH is an only child... so i naturally ask my in laws more often. Do you ask or are you waiting for an offer? I find it is best to ask - let them say no!

Message edited 2/4/2018 11:01:54 PM.

Re: Grandparents

I agree with the other posters, are you saying to your parents I have X activity and could you babysit? Or do you just think they should stop by and you leave? If I ask, my parents or Inlaws will babysit, but I don't really ask, unless really needed.

Grandparents

I was just curious as to whether or not this was the norm. My friends' parents babysit frequently so I was wondering if we were in the vast minority.

Re: Grandparents

My parents live about 40 mins away and we usually see them around once a week, and they babysit when we ask them to. We try not to abuse the luxury but it ends up being on average 2-3 times a month. Sometimes less, sometimes more. I feel very fortunate.

My husband’s dad lives in NJ so we see them less often than my parents and when we do, it’s really a social visit. Honestly I’d feel bad asking his dad for help since we see him less frequently so the time we spend together is more of a novelty. That said, I know if we did ask him to babysit, he’d be here in approx 2 hours.

Re: Grandparents

My mom babysits while I work (she covers 1 day and after school a few days) and my mother in law does the same. I rarely go out at night (my husband works weekend overnights now so I'd be going out alone anyway) but my parents babysit occasionally...I'd say once every 2 months. It's only when I ask, they don't offer. My parents do take my kids a lot, but it's not so we can go out...it's really to do things with them. My mother in law babysits about 2 times a year at night. I don't really ask. She never really asks to see my kids other than the days they get off the bus at her house, which is her loss. I feel like grandparents are either obsessed and want to see the kids all the time or are completely hands off.

Re: Grandparents

An older coworker once told me that while it is nice to have grandparents that babysit.... it’s certainly their life an not an obligation. It took me a while to come to terms with that.

Re: Grandparents

In addition to my parents and my in laws each watching my kids once a week while we are at work, they each watch them probably once a month or so for random reasons (i.e. if my older daughter has a friends bday party, taking one of the girls out to see a show, going to a wedding, etc.). We are incredibly blessed and our parents are thrilled that they can help us. They adore spending time with our girls. And will even just randomly drop by to play with them. Whenever I mention that I need to start finding a sitter, our parents always protest. We live about 5 minutes from both my parents and my in laws

Grandparents

My in laws live out of state, but if they’re visiting, DH and I will go out one night and they’ll babysit. My parents are local and if I need them to babysit, I ask them. They are not the type to call up and offer to babysit out of the blue just to hang with the grandchildren. We always have to ask.

Grandparents

My MIL watches DD 4 days a week. My FIL will visit one of those 4 days. My parents live about 2 hrs away and my mom will ask to take DD for about a week every few weeks. DD is 1.

Grandparents

MIL--once in a blue moon and very few and far between if we need to run somewhere really and we know DD will be antsy if we take her. (like for instance we had to go to Lowes yesterday and we knew we would be there for quite some time so MIL came over to watch her)

My parents--they are the ones that watch her when DD is off from school, or if me and DH want to go out one night, (which we haven't in forever now that my parents cover school breaks)

DD is almost 6.

Re: Grandparents

Both my inlaws and parents have babysat the kids several times. We live pretty close to both of them.
Sometimes it could be once a month, sometimes more and some less. We also have local babysitters too that the kids love. For longer nights where we may be further we use grandparents.
My IL's love it when the boys sleepover.
They don't always ask. We ask them and I try and take turns asking. They both also have busy lives and like to stay busy with friends and active, but they are also retired so easy to move stuff around if needed.
My kids are also 8 and 6 so they're pretty easy and the grandparents usually take them somewhere like dinner, movies, bowling, etc.
We also went away recently and they stayed at my parents.

Re: Grandparents

Babysit for a night out maybe once a month but they would do it whenever we asked. My mom watches my girls while I run errands probably about 2x a week. My girls are older now 5 & 7 and don’t need constant supervision like when they were small. My mom loves having them they are fun and no longer babies.

Message edited 2/5/2018 8:52:03 AM.

Re: Grandparents

Never, for any of the grandparents

Re: Grandparents

Re: Grandparents

Re: Grandparents

My mom watches my little one from Tuesday morning until Thursday morning. My DH travels for a living and I work full time - she does this to relieve some of my burden during the week (I have an older son as well - we cram in religion, piano and guitar lessons in those 2 afternoons when my mom has the baby). My parents also watch the 2 boys for a full weekend once a month or so. The kids love it, my parents love it, and we love it.

My IL's are not local, so they're no help.

Editing to add - my mom does this freely - she WANTS to help out - I never ask her for help unless I'm completely in a bind.

Message edited 2/5/2018 9:24:39 AM.

Grandparents

We do not live near our parents so they very rarely watch my DS.

My ILs and parents will offer to watch him when we are either visiting them or they are visiting us. So, they have probably watched him 4-5 times total.

My parents watch my siblings' kids ALL THE TIME. They watch them while they are working (M, T, W) and when they go out for date nights.

Grandparents

I try not to burden my parents. I only have 1 child who is 5 who is generally good, but she has a lot of energy... they just cannot/ don’t want to keep up with her. She will have a sleepover night maybe once or twice a month.

Grandparents

My parents or MIL are all happy to watch them for any hour or two whenever I need (during doctor appointments, school conferences, a hair appointment, etc). We're very lucky that all have very flexible schedules so I rarely have an issue and my parents are a mile away. As far as watching them so we can go out at night, it's a few times a year but that's more our choice than theirs.

Re: Grandparents

Re: Grandparents

I find this varies a lot in different families.

My parents live far away but visit once a month (or we go there). They really try to force us to take advantage and go out. They constantly offer to help and are willing to come whenever we need.

My inlaws are close by but rarely see my kids. They babysat maybe 2 times last year. But it was specific plans we asked for well in advance. We basically see them on holidays.

I think that alone time is so good for child and grandparent. Both our parents had a lot of help when they raised us. I do think parents should want to help and this is how I plan to be as a grandparent. It’s so hard to have 2 working parents. And no picnic for SAHMs either. I just think families should help each other. I do believe it takes a village.

It upsets me that inlaws can’t be bothered. But there’s nothing I can do. I feel it hurts them more than it hurts us. They are missing out on bonding with my kids. I’ve just tried to accept that.

We plan on paying sitters when the kids are a little older. Right now we don’t go out that much and. They go to sleep at 8, so we do date night at home.

Re: Grandparents

Posted by w8andsee

Posted by NervousNell

Posted by LuckyStar



A friend of mine drops her son off at her parents almost every weekend and he stays there from Friday to Sunday.

So this. I need to know. Why???
Do the parents work weekends or something?

I know someone that does this to. They just need a break.

Grandparents

My ILs live out of state and my parents have a second home out of state so they are in NY about half the time. My ILs babysat for a weekend for us when we had a wedding and my parents baby sit a couple of times per year I would say.