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SKPtzu
Oh boys
Member since 6/08 1388 total posts
Name:
SKPtzu
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Fear of fertility problems (long)
I understand that getting pregnant isn't always easy and it can take months to years to conceive with two completely healthy partners.
Even though we just started trying, I have this fear of fertility problems and trying for a year before we find out.
I dread dealing with the heartache month after month for an entire year only to find out something like my tubes are blocked or DH's guys aren't swimming and there was no chance that we would have gotten pregnant on our own. I personally think I would want to know now so I have some time to accept it and then have an action plan.
DH is 13 years older than I am, and he would like to be done having kids in 3-4 years from now. It puts a little more pressure on, KWIM?
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Posted 8/27/08 4:31 PM  |
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Long Island Weddings
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SummerMiracle
LIF Toddler
Member since 7/08 465 total posts
Name:
Brianne (Bri)
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Re: Fear of fertility problems (long)
I hear ya- I think these are normal fears (at least I hope they are because I have them too.) 
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| Posted 8/27/08 4:33 PM |
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zoe282
We have our miracle!
Member since 8/08 3634 total posts
Name:
Jen
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Re: Fear of fertility problems (long)
I think they are totally normal fears too...DH and I are not TTC just yet (got married in June) but I feel the same way. Until recently i never knew how much heartache could be involved in TTC....I honestly believed it just happend when you tried! That being said I hear that pressure to conceive is also a factor...that when people just try to enjoy themselves things just happen?
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| Posted 8/27/08 4:39 PM |
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JennyPenny
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Member since 1/08 12702 total posts
Name:
Jen
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Re: Fear of fertility problems (long)
How long have you been trying?
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| Posted 8/27/08 4:39 PM |
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SKPtzu
Oh boys
Member since 6/08 1388 total posts
Name:
SKPtzu
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Re: Fear of fertility problems (long)
Posted by JennyPenny
How long have you been trying?
This was our first month trying. AF is due friday and I definitely feel she is coming. My attitude for most of the month was very relaxed. Now, that I know AF is coming, I can't even believe how upset and disappointed I am. I'm very sad (and hormonal). 
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| Posted 8/27/08 4:45 PM |
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JennyPenny
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Member since 1/08 12702 total posts
Name:
Jen
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Re: Fear of fertility problems (long)
Posted by SKPtzu
Posted by JennyPenny
How long have you been trying?
This was our first month trying. AF is due friday and I definitely feel she is coming. My attitude for most of the month was very relaxed. Now, that I know AF is coming, I can't even believe how upset and disappointed I am. I'm very sad (and hormonal).
I know it's awful even the first month, but just try to remember that it takes MOST couples at LEAST 3-4 months to get pregnant. I would say to just give it a couple of months using OPKs and charting-if you do that (I never could)- and if you still aren't pregnant, talk to your ob/gyn about having basic testing done, CD3 blood work, internal sono, semen analysis. You can learn alot just from those tests.
Good luck and I hope your stay is short and sweet
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| Posted 8/27/08 4:54 PM |
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BlueDiamonds
mommy to 3 boys
Member since 2/07 3885 total posts
Name:
proud mommy
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Re: Fear of fertility problems (long)
Posted by JennyPenny
[I know it's awful even the first month, but just try to remember that it takes MOST couples at LEAST 3-4 months to get pregnant. I would say to just give it a couple of months using OPKs and charting-if you do that (I never could)- and if you still aren't pregnant, talk to your ob/gyn about having basic testing done, CD3 blood work, internal sono, semen analysis. You can learn alot just from those tests.
Good luck and I hope your stay is short and sweet
ITA! I understand how hard it is and i think sometimes reading the boards can "heighten" your emotions about these things (I never realized that IF is so common until reading these boards). If you are not the type of person to just let whatever happens happen (i certainly am not!), then you can step it up a notch and either chart or use OPKs to pinpoint your O day. If, after 4 months of BFNs, you could always approach your doctor about it. As we always say, you are not out until AF shows her ugly head!
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| Posted 8/27/08 5:14 PM |
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MrDeeNMe
whatcha doin!?
Member since 1/08 1705 total posts
Name:
Nikole
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Re: Fear of fertility problems (long)
Posted by SKPtzu
DH is 13 years older than I am, and he would like to be done having kids in 3-4 years from now. It puts a little more pressure on, KWIM?
If this is the case, I would talk to your GYN now and he/she can send DH to have a semen analysis done (he can do "it" at home)... and if your concerns are as strong as they sound, I would make and appt to talk to your GYN (or just call him/her) and maybe he/she will send you to have the CD3 blood workup done now...
Have faith and it will happen... yes, it's hard and disappointing, but you have DH and us to lean on if you need it...
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| Posted 8/27/08 5:20 PM |
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Angel321
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Member since 4/08 15553 total posts
Name:
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Re: Fear of fertility problems (long)
after only 1 month of trying - you aren't going to get many doctors who will listen to you.
unfortunately that is the harsh reality of it.
our doc told us that until dave drops dead - he'll be producing healthy sperm...*unless he has an issue*... (dave is 5 years older than me and we are starting to have children 'later in life' than most. he's 38)
a healthy couple on average takes 6-9 months to get pregnant....
if you start tracking AF now - and notice any patterns that are causing your concern - they will likely take you much more seriously than calling after 1 month.
I MORE than understand your concern - believe me. I had worries and fears and let them be for 5 months. After tracking my cycles for the past 3 months - i have learned that I have a short LP. I went back to my doc and told her that and she said that 6 months is our cut off without seeking outside help....
For a healthy couple, most doctors will not refer you anywhere until a year...that is what we were told..
Message edited 8/27/2008 6:01:59 PM.
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| Posted 8/27/08 5:42 PM |
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diva7531
My Peanut
Member since 2/07 5199 total posts
Name:
Ryan 3 boys EDD 11/6!
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Re: Fear of fertility problems (long)
Posted by SKPtzu
I understand that getting pregnant isn't always easy and it can take months to years to conceive with two completely healthy partners.
Even though we just started trying, I have this fear of fertility problems and trying for a year before we find out.
I dread dealing with the heartache month after month for an entire year only to find out something like my tubes are blocked or DH's guys aren't swimming and there was no chance that we would have gotten pregnant on our own. I personally think I would want to know now so I have some time to accept it and then have an action plan.
DH is 13 years older than I am, and he would like to be done having kids in 3-4 years from now. It puts a little more pressure on, KWIM?
I would think that age is a factor when talking to a Dr, they may want you to wait 6 months before seeking "help"
It never hurts to ask.
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| Posted 8/27/08 5:50 PM |
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MrsS2005
Mom of 3
Member since 11/05 13118 total posts
Name:
B
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Re: Fear of fertility problems (long)
I had this fear too. It's completely normal to feel this way.
It took my mom several years to get pregnant with me. I had very irregular cycles before going on the pill. I was worried that I would have trouble getting pregnant. I was extremely fortunate to get pregnant quickly.
Are you charting or using OPKs? Are your cycles regular? I know it's hard to wait, but unless there's some indication of a problem, most doctors won't see you until you've been TTC for at least 6-12 months. Good luck!  
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| Posted 8/27/08 6:48 PM |
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carlowlou
loving my babies!
Member since 4/08 4594 total posts
Name:
Jen
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Re: Fear of fertility problems (long)
I understand your fear. This is our 5th month of TTC. We have been very relaxed with our methods and I have no reason to suspect infertility right now because my cycles are very regular and I know that even that being the case, it can take up to 11 or 12 months to happen.
But I can't help thinking, this is our 5th month..what if infertility problems are the cause?
I know I have to be proactive and see the dr and chart and use OPKs etc. but in some ways, I just want to relax and let it happen.
But like you, I have this fear that it won't. I have had the fear since month 1 too so I understand what you're talking about....
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| Posted 8/28/08 12:37 PM |
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futuremommy
LIF Adolescent
Member since 8/07 840 total posts
Name:
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Re: Fear of fertility problems (long)
I agree - an SA is the least invasive of all tests and easy to do, so it wouldn't hurt to know what you're starting with in terms of your DH.
If you're really desperate, you can always tell your doctor you've been trying longer than you have been. But, in all honesty, I would give it a few months - you might be pleasantly surprised. I was always worried that we'd have fertility problems, but when the time came, I got PG first shot. Unfortunately I miscarried and now we've been trying for 5 months with no luck - but it just goes to show, you never can tell what will happen. Even the same woman might have different experiences trying to get pregnant at different times.
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| Posted 8/28/08 12:59 PM |
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MikesWife
Wanting...........
Member since 1/06 6887 total posts
Name:
Karen
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Re: Fear of fertility problems (long)
I was lucky in the fact that when my Dr. asked me how long we were trying (3 months at that point) and how long my cycles were (35-45 days) he immediately wrote a prescription for CD 3 blood work. He said "let's be proactive and find out what's going on here." I have my appt to go over the blood work on Sept. 9th.
Talk to your Dr. if he/she says wait 6 months to a year ask them point blank if you can do it now. What's the harm in asking? It's not like it's painful- they just take blood.
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| Posted 8/28/08 1:18 PM |
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SKPtzu
Oh boys
Member since 6/08 1388 total posts
Name:
SKPtzu
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Re: Fear of fertility problems (long)
Just want to thank everybody for your responses! It's comforting to know that I'm not the only one who has these fears.
We are going to try for another few months to see what happens.
Sometimes (as i've been told by DH many times) I just need to relax.
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| Posted 8/28/08 4:37 PM |
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