Even though I was real down this weekend, I really felt that today I would be alright. I knew I had my RE appointment this morning and I knew that I was just going to tell them that I tested and not to call me and tell me what I already knew. These are all the things I thought I knew. What I didnt know was the girl who was on the same IVF schedule must have tested this weekend and she got the news SHE wanted and couldnt get the $hit eating grin off of her face. She got the correct 50%. What I didnt know was that the stupid blood *itch couldnt find my vein and I had to be stuck three times to get blood to show what I already knew. What I didnt know was that when I told the nurse not to call me with the results that was going to start sobbing uncontrolably. I also didnt know that I have to rest in between cycles and I didnt know that there are no doctor consults in July unless I take a day off from work that I dont have. I didnt know that I would be hysterically crying that I couldnt drive my car and had to have DH turn around from heading to work and come pick me up. What I didnt know was that my boss would text me 14 times today because apparently he cant effing function without me. And what I really didnt know what that I could actually cry....all day....practically non-stop....over something that I already knew this weekend....I have cramps and I just cant seem to pull it together. I guess I just didnt know it was going to hurt so bad. Please hug me
