| Posted By |
Message |
| Pages: [1] 2 |
OffWithHerHead23
Keep passing the open windows
Member since 10/06 3627 total posts
Name:
Meaghan
|
Blasé attitudes about pools
This weekend we were at a pool party at a very good friends house. They have a big inground pool with a diving board. They have a very lacksadaisical attitude about the pool... No fence, no alarm, and the kids (6 and 3) are always outside unsupervised with the pool right there. She had almost 40 kids coming to the party and 4 days before the party I convinced her to hire a lifeguard. I asked on here, on Facebook, called old students of mine who used to lifeguard. She calls me on Saturday to tell me she got a lifeguard. Ok, great. We get there today and the lifeguard is a fifteen year old girl who lives down the block. No certification, no nothing. My feeling is, I'm going to be in the pool the entire time with my kids anyway. My 12 year old is an extremely strong swimmer, so no worries there. My seven year old can barely dog paddle and needs swimmies, and my four year old is in a life jacket. I spent the entire party in the pool with them.
It was absolutely unreal to me what went on. There were at least 30 kids in the pool. I was the only adult unless you count the "lifeguard." There was one little girl who was five and really could not swim, but thought she could. The lifeguard had to pull her out of the pool choking and sputtering several times and so did I. And she would jump right back in. I never even saw the mother. How do you let your five year old who can't swim in a pool and not even watch her??? The kids were jumping off the diving board on top of each other. A three year old (wearing a puddle jumper thingy, thank God) slipped as she was jumping and cracked her head on the diving board and fell into the pool. Someone had to get her mom in the house after she was scooped out of the pool. In my opinion, the parent should have been right there.
Maybe I'm paranoid, or overly nervous. I don't know. I just feel like all we hear on the news all summer is kids drowning in backyard pools. And then you're going to go kick back and drink beer at a backyard BBQ and not pay attention to your little kid in the water just because there's a fifteen year old watching 35 kids at once? I don't get it. I had to vent about this, and maybe it's a PSA for other parents.
|
Posted 7/8/13 1:02 AM  |
| |
|
Long Island Weddings
Long Island's Largest Bridal Resource |
Stephybaby
Love my two girls!!
Member since 11/07 1966 total posts
Name:
Stephy
|
Re: Blasé attitudes about pools
As a mother and a pool owner, I can't even imagine that something like this even happened. I have a loop lock fence around the pool. Anyone that comes over knows my strict rules. Everyone, including good swimmers, under the age of 8 wears a life vest. No life vest, no pool. Every parents accompanies their child in the pool.
If I have a party, I will hire a certified lifeguard as an added precaution.
It's unbelievable to me that parents behave that way.
|
| Posted 7/8/13 2:31 AM |
| |
|
LiveItUp
Love my babies!
Member since 8/11 4096 total posts
Name:
|
Blasé attitudes about pools
That's so scary. I would be just like you, in the pool with my Dd or at least right next to the pool. I was at a party on July 4th and there was a little girl, 2 years old, wearing a swim vest, but in the pool all by herself with just other young kids, no adults nearby. Her parents were over by the house where they couldn't see her. At one point I heard the mother come to her senses and say to the father that they should go watch her but the father looked at her like was crazy and said 'she's wearing a life vest' in a very laid back tone, as if nothing can happen to a two year old as long as she has some styrofoam strapped to her back. I couldn't believe it!
|
| Posted 7/8/13 6:24 AM |
| |
|
BargainMama
LIF Adult
Member since 5/09 15660 total posts
Name:
|
Blasé attitudes about pools
Isn't it against the law to not have an alarm or a fence around your pool? I was looking this up the other day, and at least in Suffolk, you need a fence for even those temporary pools, and it needs to be around the pool itself. Soooo irresponsible! I'm like you, I would have been in that pool the entire time!
|
| Posted 7/8/13 6:59 AM |
| |
|
allIwant
Love my crazy life!
Member since 1/10 9170 total posts
Name:
|
Re: Blasé attitudes about pools
That's insane! We have a pool and if any of the parents behaved this way I would say something!! My kids are only 2.5 but I can't imagine not having to watch them even for years to come. Even if a child is a strong swimmer things can happen especially with that many kids in the pool. That poor girl lifeguarding.
|
| Posted 7/8/13 7:01 AM |
| |
|
alli3131
Peanut is here!!!!!!
Member since 5/09 18388 total posts
Name:
Allison
|
Re: Blasé attitudes about pools
Posted by BargainMama
Isn't it against the law to not have an alarm or a fence around your pool? I was looking this up the other day, and at least in Suffolk, you need a fence for even those temporary pools, and it needs to be around the pool itself. Soooo irresponsible! I'm like you, I would have been in that pool the entire time!
They need to have a fence by law but it doesn't need to be right around the pool just fully enclosing the pool. So the fence can be around the entire backyard and be ok. Alarms are only required in pools installed after 2006. So they may not need one by law. And my MIL has an alarm and if she didn't show me I never would have even known.
As for supervision. I think if you are going to invite that many kids for a pool party supervision is on you. 30 kids in a pool is too many unless it is Olympic sized.
|
| Posted 7/8/13 7:28 AM |
| |
|
BargainMama
LIF Adult
Member since 5/09 15660 total posts
Name:
|
Re: Blasé attitudes about pools
Posted by alli3131
Posted by BargainMama
Isn't it against the law to not have an alarm or a fence around your pool? I was looking this up the other day, and at least in Suffolk, you need a fence for even those temporary pools, and it needs to be around the pool itself. Soooo irresponsible! I'm like you, I would have been in that pool the entire time!
They need to have a fence by law but it doesn't need to be right around the pool just fully enclosing the pool. So the fence can be around the entire backyard and be ok. Alarms are only required in pools installed after 2006. So they may not need one by law. And my MIL has an alarm and if she didn't show me I never would have even known.
As for supervision. I think if you are going to invite that many kids for a pool party supervision is on you. 30 kids in a pool is too many unless it is Olympic sized.
Hmm, I read it like 3 times and it definitely said around the pool (in addition to around the yard). That was the Town of Brookhaven though, so maybe it's different in other Towns.
Actually I just looked it up on the Town site again, and it links to NYS, so it's not just town specific.
The barrier must completely surround the swimming pool and must obstruct access to the swimming pool.
The barrier must be at least 4 feet (48 inches) high.
In the case of an above-ground pool, the barrier may be at ground level or mounted on top of the pool structure; however, if the barrier is mounted on top of the pool structure, the space between the top of the pool structure and the bottom of the barrier cannot exceed 4 inches.
A building wall can form part of the required barrier. However, where a wall of a dwelling serves as part of the barrier, at least one of the following requirements must be satisfied:
the pool must be equipped with a powered safety cover
all doors with direct access to the pool through that wall must be equipped with an alarm or other means of protection, such as self-closing doors with self-latching devices, which are approved by the governing body
Contact your local municipality for additional code and zoning requirements
P.S., it really shouldn't matter if your pool was built before 2006, any responsible pool owner with children should have a pool alarm.
Message edited 7/8/2013 7:54:05 AM.
|
| Posted 7/8/13 7:48 AM |
| |
|
|
|
Blasé attitudes about pools
Frankly, I'm surprised we didn't hear about any of the attendants on the news! I feel the way you do and am shocked..seems very irresponsible on the owner's part!
|
| Posted 7/8/13 7:50 AM |
| |
|
alli3131
Peanut is here!!!!!!
Member since 5/09 18388 total posts
Name:
Allison
|
Re: Blasé attitudes about pools
Posted by BargainMama
[
The barrier must completely surround the swimming pool and must obstruct access to the swimming pool.
The barrier must be at least 4 feet (48 inches) high.
In the case of an above-ground pool, the barrier may be at ground level or mounted on top of the pool structure; however, if the barrier is mounted on top of the pool structure, the space between the top of the pool structure and the bottom of the barrier cannot exceed 4 inches.
A building wall can form part of the required barrier. However, where a wall of a dwelling serves as part of the barrier, at least one of the following requirements must be satisfied:
the pool must be equipped with a powered safety cover
all doors with direct access to the pool through that wall must be equipped with an alarm or other means of protection, such as self-closing doors with self-latching devices, which are approved by the governing body
Contact your local municipality for additional code and zoning requirements
This means just around the yard. 2 elatives jsut had pools instaled one above and one in ground and both aleady had fenced in yards and all they needed where the gate locks and alarms installed
|
| Posted 7/8/13 8:33 AM |
| |
|
Cacarina
Two girls!
Member since 12/09 2971 total posts
Name:
Cari
|
Re: Blasé attitudes about pools
This sounds like an absolute nightmare! I cannot believe what you describe. The scary thing about drowning is that it is NOTHING like you think. No arms flailing, no screaming - it is actually very silent and many times it is discovered after it is too late. Glad you were there to supervise your children - and other people's children and no one was seriously hurt.
|
| Posted 7/8/13 8:42 AM |
| |
|
BeachGal
LIF Adult
Member since 2/10 2827 total posts
Name:
J
|
Re: Blasé attitudes about pools
That sounds like a crazy situation! I went to a pool party this weekend also at a home with a huge IGP. There were tons of kids at the party and I think they all went in with their parents but I am honestly not sure as my eyes were glued on my own DC. I went in the pool with my 2 year old and my DH went in with the baby! If these parents are relying on other parents they shouldn't. Not sure if this sounds bad, but the only kid I saw in the pool was my own and I was holding him or right by his side. I glue my eyes on him so I honestly couldn't watch another kid too. I think the parents should be more responsible.
|
| Posted 7/8/13 8:44 AM |
| |
|
ali120206
2 Boys
Member since 7/06 17795 total posts
Name:
|
Re: Blasé attitudes about pools
Posted by alli3131
Posted by BargainMama
[
The barrier must completely surround the swimming pool and must obstruct access to the swimming pool.
The barrier must be at least 4 feet (48 inches) high.
In the case of an above-ground pool, the barrier may be at ground level or mounted on top of the pool structure; however, if the barrier is mounted on top of the pool structure, the space between the top of the pool structure and the bottom of the barrier cannot exceed 4 inches.
A building wall can form part of the required barrier. However, where a wall of a dwelling serves as part of the barrier, at least one of the following requirements must be satisfied:
the pool must be equipped with a powered safety cover
all doors with direct access to the pool through that wall must be equipped with an alarm or other means of protection, such as self-closing doors with self-latching devices, which are approved by the governing body
Contact your local municipality for additional code and zoning requirements
This means just around the yard. 2 elatives jsut had pools instaled one above and one in ground and both aleady had fenced in yards and all they needed where the gate locks and alarms installed
Yes - it just needs to be around the yard - not just the pool itself.
I make sure my kids are always supervised in the pool - even the kid pool we have in our backyard.
It amazes me how many people don't watch their kids - we belong to a pool club and there are unattended kids under 5 everywhere. There are lifeguards but, I think that it's the parents (or caregivers) responsibility to watch their kids as well!
|
| Posted 7/8/13 8:52 AM |
| |
|
JenMarie
One day at a time
Member since 11/07 7397 total posts
Name:
Jennifer
|
Blasé attitudes about pools
Pools scare the living daylights out of me. The stories are too frequently on the news. What happened at that party is not ok by any means. My DD doesn't go in the pool unless I am with her IN it. I'm completely with you on this one.
|
| Posted 7/8/13 8:56 AM |
| |
|
StaceyWill
It's a girl!!!
Member since 6/10 21539 total posts
Name:
Stacey
|
Blasé attitudes about pools
This is very scary...And what's even scarier is that so many parents at the pool party were so blase about it too. Terrifying.
|
| Posted 7/8/13 9:16 AM |
| |
|
MrsG72907
Mommy of 2 girls!
Member since 5/10 2046 total posts
Name:
|
Re: Blasé attitudes about pools
I'm too nervous about pools and that is the reason I would NEVER have a pool in my yard. I empty the 6 inch deep kiddie pool the second DD gets out bc water is such a hazard to children as well as pets.
I am more shocked at the parents attending the party. It is their responsibility to watch their own children. You cannot assume or trust that anyone else is supervising your own child. That's just me.
I've also read/heard too many stories about pool tragedies and not just children. My brothers best friend passed away as a 30 something bc he was swimming alone and passed out. One of the parenting magazines also recently had an article about a family who had a secured pool with gate, etc. who lost their 3 year old. The main point of the article is their is absolutely NO substitute for supervision and being within arms reach.
|
| Posted 7/8/13 9:23 AM |
| |
|
DiamondGirl
You are my I love you
Member since 7/09 18802 total posts
Name:
DiamondMama
|
Re: Blasé attitudes about pools
That is scary and neglectful. Our new home has a pool and although there is a fence around it we are still very nervous about it as we have a young son, no way will any children ever be allowed in my pool without their parents watching them/in the pool with them.
Message edited 7/8/2013 9:32:14 AM.
|
| Posted 7/8/13 9:30 AM |
| |
|
OffWithHerHead23
Keep passing the open windows
Member since 10/06 3627 total posts
Name:
Meaghan
|
Blasé attitudes about pools
My husband and I were just completely amazed by the lack of attention during the entire party. It's truly a miracle that no one died, IMHO. She has a seven foot fence around her entire property but nothing around the pool itself. I really want to say something to her about it, but DH says leave it alone, she knows how I feel about it, and to just pay attention to our own kids when we are there in party situations (we are over there like once a week for hanging out otherwise).
|
| Posted 7/8/13 9:51 AM |
| |
|
BargainMama
LIF Adult
Member since 5/09 15660 total posts
Name:
|
Re: Blasé attitudes about pools
Posted by alli3131
Posted by BargainMama
[
The barrier must completely surround the swimming pool and must obstruct access to the swimming pool.
The barrier must be at least 4 feet (48 inches) high.
In the case of an above-ground pool, the barrier may be at ground level or mounted on top of the pool structure; however, if the barrier is mounted on top of the pool structure, the space between the top of the pool structure and the bottom of the barrier cannot exceed 4 inches.
A building wall can form part of the required barrier. However, where a wall of a dwelling serves as part of the barrier, at least one of the following requirements must be satisfied:
the pool must be equipped with a powered safety cover
all doors with direct access to the pool through that wall must be equipped with an alarm or other means of protection, such as self-closing doors with self-latching devices, which are approved by the governing body
Contact your local municipality for additional code and zoning requirements
This means just around the yard. 2 elatives jsut had pools instaled one above and one in ground and both aleady had fenced in yards and all they needed where the gate locks and alarms installed
Ohhh! I thought there had to be a fence around the pool itself! Good to know, since we wanted to get one of those temporary pools that are about 3 feet deep, but had no idea how I would fence around that!
|
| Posted 7/8/13 10:31 AM |
| |
|
mommy2B3
2 boys 2 girls!!!!
Member since 7/08 3324 total posts
Name:
M
|
Re: Blasé attitudes about pools
We have a pool where we live, and there is a lifeguard on duty at all times, soo apparently some parents think its fine to let their kids in the pool by themselves. My DH and I are always so shocked that these 4 yr olds parents have their back to the pool.. im like u, my kids are in the pool that means so am I (or DH but usually both). My DH was a lifeguard growing up and he has so many scary stories that he is very cautious in pools.
|
| Posted 7/8/13 10:42 AM |
| |
|
|
|
Re: Blasé attitudes about pools
That is just crazy!! Water scares the day lights out of me...even though I LOVE to swim myself. It really is a miracle there wasn't some tragic event at that party. I will never understand how any parent can think it's ok to leave their own child unattended in/near water and just expect that someone else will be there "just in case".
|
| Posted 7/8/13 11:29 AM |
| |
|
jgl
Love my little boys!!!
Member since 8/07 7060 total posts
Name:
g
|
Re: Blasé attitudes about pools
This drives me nuts! My friend had her dc bday party in her yard, no fence around the in ground pool. She had a character for entertainment to the side of the pool, maybe 8 feet from pool. The character had kids doing the limbo. My son was 1 at the time (so was hers) and was having fun running around. I was standing right there guarding but he still ran to the edge of the pool and i grabbed him before he fell in. So scary!
Every year she has a party back there and i have to keep chasing my son around the yard so he doesn't fall in. The pool takes up most of the yard.
|
| Posted 7/8/13 11:57 AM |
| |
|
2ofakind05
LIF Adolescent
Member since 8/08 754 total posts
Name:
Robyn
|
Re: Blasé attitudes about pools
DS is a pretty good swimmer, and he is only 4. I or DH sit right by the pool when I am not in it. It does amaze me though how many parents do not feel the same as you. I live in a complex where there are always 2 lifeguards, but I'm still right there, not reading, not sleeping, just watching my DS. So many parents are just hanging out while the lifeguards are watching their children. Amazing.....
|
| Posted 7/8/13 12:04 PM |
| |
|
MrsKelly
just hangin' around...
Member since 11/06 6305 total posts
Name:
Krista
|
Re: Blasé attitudes about pools
that would give me such anxiety to be at a party like that. if I had a pool and hosted a party, there's no way I could let that go on. if someone drowned in my pool bc there wasn't enough supervision or what have you? I cannot even fathom. I grew up where my parents had an in-ground pool. they have a fence around their yard, then a fence with a combo lock around the pool. you hear stories on the news about kids climbing neighbors fences and drowning in pools... awful... but there's not much more they could do. I can't imagine as a kid, climbing a fence to get in someone else's pool (or my own) but I guess that's another story.
my dd is 8 months now... I would like to get a pool when she's a little older but even though I grew up with one and am an extremely strong swimmer myself, it still makes me nervous bc you just never know.
if I brought any young child of mine to a pool party, they would not be out of my sight or reach for a second. even if I didn't agree with the lack of fence of the homeowner or lack of supervision etc, I guess at the end of the day, it's just my responsibility to worry about my own kid. and I just can't wrap my mind around any parent not taking THEIR need for supervision seriously. that's neglectful and crazy to me.
|
| Posted 7/8/13 12:18 PM |
| |
|
EricaAlt
LIF Adult
Member since 7/08 22665 total posts
Name:
Erica
|
Re: Blasé attitudes about pools
Pools scare the sh$% out of me and we have a big inground pool. DH had one so really wanted one too when we were looking for houses a few years ago. I do LOVE my backyard and the pool, but safety first.
My boys are 4 and 2. They are getting swim lessons and I ALWAYS supervise them. My 4 yr old loves the water and great with the puddle jumper. I sit on the steps while he swims around or go around with him. My 2 yr old is not into swimming. WE have a safety gate with the laches around the pool. Always make sure they are closed when we go outside.
We do have pool parties, but I have had a lifeguard and my friends are always in the pool. I usually have my IL's sit and watch the pool the entire time too.
Message edited 7/8/2013 12:40:11 PM.
|
| Posted 7/8/13 12:28 PM |
| |
|
Bridex100
Two Under Two Mommy
Member since 3/08 10420 total posts
Name:
Momx100
|
Re: Blasé attitudes about pools
I am shocked that the parents of the kids just let young non-swimmers into the pool by themselves. I have a 2yo and 4yo and would never let them in the pool by themselves.
Although a 15 year old is not an ideal lifeguard, the host got someone to watch the pool.
|
| Posted 7/8/13 12:37 PM |
| |
|
| Pages: [1] 2 |
