Are you married to an Anti-Bob Vila?

I'd love to hear stories.

My father was a general contrator & actually built my parent's home from the ground up, and took him 2 years to do.

He is in his late 70s now, and won't be able to help us as much as he could as far as major work.

I despise paying people to do stuff for me, so how hard is it to do certain house stuff?

Or, am I just going to shell out money for laborers?

My DH grew up in Queens and never mowed a lawn and is a princess who hates getting a callous on his hands

Is there hope for someone like me?

Re: Are you married to an Anti-Bob Vila?

I have a similar DH, which is why I hire people to do things. I used to see how he mowed his moms lawn and I would laugh since it looked like a kindergartener did it! He does try to do things but honestly home repairs and maintenance are really not him. He has tried to do a few things and has been successful, but cant really do major things. He wanted to re-sheetrock some bedrooms and I immediately shot him down. Just the week before that he tried to hang a shelf for me and didnt screw it into a stud and lost the screw behind the wall. Honestly how did he think he could put up sheetrock???

Honestly hiring people was our best way to go since it will be done right and avoids us fighting and screaming at each other for wasting money, trips to Home Depot and the ER lol.

Re: Are you married to an Anti-Bob Vila?

My DH is very handy but has next to no spare time. When I'm not nine months pregnant I try to pick up the slack because like you I grew up with a father who was also very handy. My kitchen is the first time I have ever paid someone else to work in my home.

I think a majority of the simple home improvement projects are fairly easy to do if you have the right tools and are handy. However everything takes time and usually way more then you expect it to. If you are going to attempt your own home improvement projects I would start slowly. Maybe paint, replace base molding etc. I wouldn't go for a full on Kitchen or bathroom remodel. In certain situations it just makes more sense to hire someone to do the work for you.

Message edited 6/6/2010 3:35:43 PM.

Re: Are you married to an Anti-Bob Vila?

we're married to the same man!! DH grew up in a co-op in whitestone and has trouble changing a lightbulb. luckily our dads are handy, otherwise i try to do things myself. but for big things, we have no choice but to hire people to get it done right.

Re: Are you married to an Anti-Bob Vila?

My husband never did anything when growing up. Since getting married he has become quite skilled! He really enjoys it actually and will take on any task. He reads up before taking anything on which can be a blessing. He also doesn't hesitate in asking for help from my side who has many skilled people.

Re: Are you married to an Anti-Bob Vila?

OMG yes. My husband is the antithesis of handy! My dad is very good with stuff and it's very frustrating to me that DH is not. We bought a house that needs so much work and it is going SO SLOW b/c we have to hire people or ask family members to help us out

Re: Are you married to an Anti-Bob Vila?

My DH is has admitted numerous times to not being handy..he hung our wedding pictures up and it took him an hour with muttering under his breath the entire time. I grew up with my dad, who is a general contractor and Mr. Fix it..I learned a lot from him..when we were doing DD's nursery..I was painting it on a ladder at 8 mos pregnant I actually enjoy fixing things and doing things around the house..DH laughs at me, bc he always says if anyone saw this they'd think I was nuts (meaning him) it's a funny combo..so I'm the Bobette Villa in our house

Re: Are you married to an Anti-Bob Vila?

My DH started out not handy at all. Since being married almost 5 years he has learned a lot and does a lot more. At first we hired someone to do something for us, but when we figured out how much things cost, we figured that we could try to do things ourselves.

Re: Are you married to an Anti-Bob Vila?

OMG..DH grew up with his Dad (a dentist) telling him to get an education & a job so you can hire people to do the work...i grew up with little money and was my Dad's helper on fixing things..also had 2 older brothers and a best friend who was a handy guy...thank god...i love DH to death, and appreciate him trying to fix things...but there are times when he has no clue..in his defense he does do all the cooking (that's where I have no clue)...and i do the repairs!

Re: Are you married to an Anti-Bob Vila?

My DH has every tool imaginable given to him by his dad. In reality, his dad should have given him a rolodex with #'s to call on it. Totally not handy! He can do "technical" things like fix small electric problems but that is where it ends. We have to pay for everything.

Re: Are you married to an Anti-Bob Vila?

eh one of the biggest things that dh and i fight over his the fact he "can't" do anything. I have to fix the toilet, I have to fix the broken cabinet door, I have to install door knobs, etc. I told him if he "can't" do anything but cut the grass then he better get a second job or keep working OT so we can afford to hire people.

I am also taking classes on how to fix and do things because I know all the work is left to me. As dh said I take after my dad constantly doing/learning in order to be able to do it myself.

Re: Are you married to an Anti-Bob Vila?

My husband gives up quickly on projects which drives me crazy!

I was having problems with the baby gate, he looked at it for 2 minutes and said, " I dont know, must be defective."


My dad stops by ( I didnt even ask him about it) He says, "I'm going to go to Home Depot get some whooziewhats and straighten that out so it sits better."




I married a man the complete opposite of my father and it's biting me in the azz

My dad is 74. We are in trouble when he is no longer able to fix things or give instructions on how to do things.

Message edited 6/7/2010 10:40:13 AM.

Re: Are you married to an Anti-Bob Vila?

My DH is not really handy. He can do MINOR things and I mean MINOR

My father was never handy and always hired someone so I am used to it honestly.

My FIL helps out with some things--but again nothing major.

We bought our coop all redone--sure it cost us more but since we'd haveto pay someone anyway it evens out.

When I look at houses I get so jealous of people who can buy a huge home for cheap bc they can gut it and make it beautiful themselves..

Dh and I can barely paint

Re: Are you married to an Anti-Bob Vila?

DH is slowly learning, but can't do much. Sometimes I wish he was Bob VIlla -- it'd save us a ton of money!

Re: Are you married to an Anti-Bob Vila?

Ok, DH and I had trouble putting up a curtain rod!

Basically, we can change light bulbs and that's about it!

Re: Are you married to an Anti-Bob Vila?

Re: Are you married to an Anti-Bob Vila?

DH is not handy at all. We have to hire people. He tries but, usually just makes it worse. But I give him credit for trying!!It's perplexing to me b/c both my dad and brother are can do anything! DH can't even change the oil in my car.

Message edited 6/7/2010 12:24:34 PM.

Re: Are you married to an Anti-Bob Vila?

Re: Are you married to an Anti-Bob Vila?

DH "fixes" a clogged toilet by flushing it again.

My dad worked construction and was the super of the apartment building I grew up in. I learned a lot from my dad, and I use that knowledge in my own home.
But, I'm at that point in my life where I look at the grout in my bathroom that needs to be redone and am seriously considering hiring someone to do it instead of doing it on my own. I don't have the patience to have DH hovering over me while I'm grouting, plus my knees and back don't always agree with what I want to do.

BTW, DH's step-dad was also a super. Guess that didn't rub off on DH.

Re: Are you married to an Anti-Bob Vila?

It's not that he is not willing but the man has not 1 oz of handy in him.

But God I love him!!!!!

To the point that people laugh and tease DH that the Handyman magazine laying around the house CANNOT be his.

I have to come up with projects. He has no vision either. He will help me but need directions.

He can dig grass for me to lay a patio though. Project of the week. The rest... aka... get gravel, sand and lay patio pavers.... all MOI!

DH usually hire people.

DH does not do any yardwork AT ALL. No lawn, no weeding. The man cannot differenciate a weed from an hosta.

I built whatever IKEA piece of furniture we got. I just told him to hold the pieces.

Did I say I loved him! Oh yeah but not for his handy skills

Re: Are you married to an Anti-Bob Vila?

DH tries. He has come a long way, but still has tons to learn. Luckily he has admitted he doesn't have time for the major stuff (bathroom reno) so we are looking to hired.

What makes things worse is that I am Mrs. Bob Vila. Architect by trade, I was the one in the family who fixed everything and loved renovation. Unfortunately DH gets insulted when I know how to do things he doesn't and so he refuses on many occcasions to listen to what I have to say until a more respected "man" saids exactly what I have said.

Re: Are you married to an Anti-Bob Vila?

I knew the deal with my DH when we got an apt together a few months before we got married. I came up the stairs and saw the kitchen blinds he hung and if you are supposed to leave an inch on each side, he left 2 inches on 1 side and it was flush against the other side. Right then in there I knew I'd be doing stuff myself or hiring people. To his credit, he's done very well with a few projects as a homeowner but he does not have the attention to detail or the "measure twice, cut once" mentality that you need to take on more advanced projects. So we pay... *SIGH* He is a great guy though so I can't really complain...or I shouldn't.

Re: Are you married to an Anti-Bob Vila?

dh has 2 left hands He cracks me up bc hes been saying for the last year he needs to get a toolbox - for what i have no clue...
He mowed the lawn once with a sit down tractor. It looked like a spaceship landed in our yard.
handy and dh do not go in the same sentence...
I grew up where my father and brother fixed everything and never hired anyone to do work aroudn the house. I learned alot and fix alot around the house- dh grew up in staten island with a concrete backyard where his father always paid someone to do handy work...

Re: Are you married to an Anti-Bob Vila?

DH is sooo not handy, he has a hard time even putting together DS's toys! He tries though....before DS was born, he painted the whole house. Of course, his tape job was so bad that all around the edges of the wall, you can see a clear outline of the old paint color which drives me bonkers

Re: Are you married to an Anti-Bob Vila?

I'm married to the lazy Bob Villa.

He can do these things, but would rather spend time golfing