Need some hugs & advice.

I go AF this morning & going on to month 13. I have had two losses already and coming up to my first Due Date which makes me so sad! I just have been hysterical all day.

This process just sucks. Over the past 2 months i found out I have Annexin, MTHFR, High NK cells.

Wether you have had miscarriages, IUI's, IVF, or any fertility issue

How do you girls stay positve?????

I feel like this process has just beaten me down this whole yr.

All I can do is be mad and upset. And can stop asking why me? How do you not get so upset that u have to go through this?? P.S. I also think the progesterone is adding to me being so emotional.

Thanks!

Hugs for everyone on this board, b.c it is such a difficult process.

Re: Need some hugs & advice.

First off


My answer wil not be a popular one but I want to be honest with you. And it only pertains to me (before I get flamed...)
The only way I learned to deal with IF and cope with ups, downs and "whys" was to accept one thing: I may not walk away from all of this with a child. Not everyone does. It wasn't until I came to terms with that possibility that I was able to cope. I had to be honest and realistic so that we (DH and I) could come up with a realistic plan, set limits for ourselves and not allow it to consume and destroy us.

Like I said, not a popular thing to hear, but it is my reality and how I am surviving all of this. Becasue there was a time when I wasn't doing well and I couldn't live like that, nor could I subject DH to it.

Re: Need some hugs & advice.

Posted by BaseballWidow

First off


My answer wil not be a popular one but I want to be honest with you. And it only pertains to me (before I get flamed...)
The only way I learned to deal with IF and cope with ups, downs and "whys" was to accept one thing: I may not walk away from all of this with a child.

Message edited 3/15/2010 4:32:54 PM.

Re: Need some hugs & advice.

It's nearly impossible some days, i am not even going to lie. I try to distract myself as much as possible, honestly. Keeping busy really helps me focus on other things. Of course nothing REPLACES a baby. Take it day by day and be Kind to yourself.

Re: Need some hugs & advice.

It's not easy.......but there are some months better than others. I can't beleive I'm saying this, but I am going on month 30!

The only issue I was diagnosed with were elevated NK cells back in December. It took one month of prednisone/intralipid to get me back to normal.....and a pregnancy still didnt happen. I will tell you I am done with this prednisone! I absolutely hate it.

It's not getting me PG.....sometimes I feel like, whats the use? This is when my negativity comes in. Lastnite, I went to bed....hysterical! Guess the Sunday nite blues hit me......AF is due tomorrow, I'm sure she'll show b/c the b**ch is never late!

But....I do feel some day, one day, it will happen for me. The question is just how much longer and how? That's the part that kinda scares me a little.

Re: Need some hugs & advice.

Posted by BaseballWidow

First off


My answer wil not be a popular one but I want to be honest with you. And it only pertains to me (before I get flamed...)
The only way I learned to deal with IF and cope with ups, downs and "whys" was to accept one thing: I may not walk away from all of this with a child. Not everyone does. It wasn't until I came to terms with that possibility that I was able to cope. I had to be honest and realistic so that we (DH and I) could come up with a realistic plan, set limits for ourselves and not allow it to consume and destroy us.

Like I said, not a popular thing to hear, but it is my reality and how I am surviving all of this. Becasue there was a time when I wasn't doing well and I couldn't live like that, nor could I subject DH to it.

Re: Need some hugs & advice.

Thank you everyone for being honest! You are all so helpful! Happy to have all of you for support!

Re: Need some hugs & advice.

Posted by HopelesslyDiscouraged



Lastnite, I went to bed....hysterical! Guess the Sunday nite blues hit me......AF is due tomorrow, I'm sure she'll show b/c the b**ch is never late!

But....I do feel some day, one day, it will happen for me. The question is just how much longer and how? That's the part that kinda scares me a little.


I just wanted to say, sorry you were having a rough weekend too! I hope you get good news and AF doesn't show up tomorrow! You will be in my prayers!!!

Re: Need some hugs & advice.

Posted by BaseballWidow

First off


My answer wil not be a popular one but I want to be honest with you. And it only pertains to me (before I get flamed...)
The only way I learned to deal with IF and cope with ups, downs and "whys" was to accept one thing: I may not walk away from all of this with a child. Not everyone does. It wasn't until I came to terms with that possibility that I was able to cope. I had to be honest and realistic so that we (DH and I) could come up with a realistic plan, set limits for ourselves and not allow it to consume and destroy us.

Like I said, not a popular thing to hear, but it is my reality and how I am surviving all of this. Becasue there was a time when I wasn't doing well and I couldn't live like that, nor could I subject DH to it.

Re: Need some hugs & advice.

First: I am SO sorry for your losses

Second: It literally is a roller coaster ride, lots of ups and downs, but usually more up than downs. And it's all for that miracle of a baby.

It is a good thing that they have found all of this out and they can work with that. Good Luck on your journey, we are all here for you.

Re: Need some hugs & advice.

I'm so sorry for all that you're going through.

I think that the way that you cope is different for everyone. I can totally understand where Shawna is coming from, but if I thought that way during my whole process.. I would never have made it through.

I thought that I WOULD come out of this with a baby - no matter what. I always knew I would have a child whether it be through IUI, IVF, FET, donor eggs, donor sperm, adoption, fostering... whatever. I just knew I wanted a child and would do anything to make that happen.

I gave up hope MANY MANY times throughout.. it's hard to stay positive all the time! But to be honest, you don't have to be positive, peppy, cheerful or hopeful to get pregnant. I PROMISE you that!

Hang in there!

Re: Need some hugs & advice.

I'm sorry you are going through all of this. Its always a roller coaster ride and we dont know what we are going to get out of it. Its hard to stay positive, I know, but we have to try.
I wish you the best

Re: Need some hugs & advice.

Posted by maybeamommy

I'm so sorry for all that you're going through.

I think that the way that you cope is different for everyone. I can totally understand where Shawna is coming from, but if I thought that way during my whole process.. I would never have made it through.

I thought that I WOULD come out of this with a baby - no matter what. I always knew I would have a child whether it be through IUI, IVF, FET, donor eggs, donor sperm, adoption, fostering... whatever. I just knew I wanted a child and would do anything to make that happen.

I gave up hope MANY MANY times throughout.. it's hard to stay positive all the time! But to be honest, you don't have to be positive, peppy, cheerful or hopeful to get pregnant. I PROMISE you that!

Hang in there!