4 year old sleep regression?

Good lord I need some help!! For about 4 months now my 4 year old is up 3 to 4 times a night. He comes in, makes up some excuse why he's there (thirsty, he misses being on vacation, he just can't sleep, etc.) or doesn't even try to make an excuse, just pokes me to wake up. I'll quietly walk him back, tuck him in, he falls asleep and then he's back in a few minutes or hours.

I try talking to him during the day about what it is that's driving this and he won't discuss it, I can't tell if he doesn't know or if he just doesn't want to talk about it.

I've tried locking my door (per his request) and it worked a few nights but then he started pounding on it to come in. I've tried rewards, disincentives (taking tablet time away), I've oozed sweetness, been mean about it, NOTHING WORKS.

He stopped napping on a regular basis awhile ago.

This is almost as bad as having a newborn! Are there any other tricks out there??

4 year old sleep regression?

Rewards worked for dd once she was old enough to understand. I used a sticker chart and if she stayed in bed all night she got a sticker in the morning. If she got 7 stickers in a row she got a toy we had agreed on. If she got up one night she had to start over to get to 7. She made it to 5 or 6 and then had a slip up. After that she had it down. I figured a week straight would be enough to break the habit and it worked well. We also have a kidsleep click so she knows when she's allowed to get up.

Re: 4 year old sleep regression?

does he have any toys or stuffed animals he sleeps with? Maybe that would help him. Recently DS started wanting me to lay down next to him every.single.night at bedtime and I just couldnt do it anymore (bc dd would want the same too) so I put a shirt of mine on his teddy bear and he now sleeps with it and doesnt need me. I know falling asleep and staying asleep are two different things, but maybe giving him a bear or something that will be next to him all night and he can hold it when he wakes during the night?

Re: 4 year old sleep regression?

Re: 4 year old sleep regression?

Re: 4 year old sleep regression?

Does he sleep in the dark? Could he be scared. My kids do not and will not sleep in the dark. I let them sleep with their TV on ( i know not good but it works) and if that TV goes off they like sense it and is up. My 4 year old will cry until we go in there and put it back on. And then we have to stay there for a little bit but that's my DH fault for doing this when we put him to sleep!

4 year old sleep regression?

Night light? We have a motion activated light on the dimmest setting - it's linked to our smart home hub. If my son moves for like 10 seconds, it goes on. Before we got this, our 3 year old was waking up 1-2 times a night a couple times a week. Luckily, he remedied in within 2 weeks.

4 year old sleep regression?

My dd went thru this. We just let her sleep with us because we were too tired to fight it, with an actual newborn who was also waking up all through the night. But, she's been doing much better lately and sleeping 10-11 hours straight most nights. She has a nightlight, and we leave her a cup of water by her bed. We've talked about how if she wakes up and it's still dark try to close her eyes and think about something that makes her happy. But honestly, I think she just needed time. She still has nightmares occasionally and comes to us, but not as often any more.