potty training my 20 month ds...tips welcome

hey everybody! I've decided to start potty training my 21 month old but it is so stressful so far. I don't expect him to get it immediately so my frustration is more with myself than anything. I seem to be missing it. When I think I've gotten it in time i only get a drop...we sit for 5 or more minutes, give up and 2 minutes later he's gone in his diaper.

He's just now starting to communicate his elimination, not verbally but by grabbing himself. He also says "poop" but usually AFTER the deed is already done. When I ask "do you have to pee? Poop? or potty?" the answer is always no.

I just started but I am trying to keep track of his elimination times to put him on the potty before those times but he seems to be a bit inconsistent. I plan to go out tomorrow to pick up snacks like reeses pieces or m&ms and elmo stickers, a potty book to read to him and maybe even an elmo potty DVD. I've been told to get him to aim at cheerios or to squirt a water bottle into the potty and get him to try to mimic that. I've told DH to take him with him to the bathroom as much as possible when he's home.

Should I be teaching him to potty sitting down or start off straight away with standing up. Anything else I should try? based on his other developments I really think he should be ready for this and I'm happy that after just a few days he is already grabbing himself and saying poop. I just need to know if what I'm doing is fine or if there is more or something different i should be doing.

Re: potty training my 20 month ds...tips welcome

21 months is extremely young to potty train nowadays. is there a reason you want to do it this early? I would wait until he's at least 2.5 that way it isn't stressful for you or him. And definitely have him go sitting down first.

Re: potty training my 20 month ds...tips welcome

Start by sitting.

I'm a big fan of what people call the 3 day method because it connects urge with result (pee or poop).
I did it at 2 yr and 3 months.

I don't know what the right time to start is. DS trained easily. We still use diapers for naps and sleep.

potty training my 20 month ds...tips welcome

From what you wrote he doesn't seem ready yet. Especially for a boy, who usually train a bit older than girls.
There is no harm in familiarizing him with the potty, but don't be frustrated if this is just not the right time.

Re: potty training my 20 month ds...tips welcome

try the 3 day method someone sent it to me and i did it and it worked great. in the book she says that any one over 21 months is ready to be trainned.

I will say we dont have night traning down yet i tried for about a month or so and gave up and now use pullups at night

EAT: i trained DD at a little over 25 months

Message edited 3/20/2013 9:49:23 AM.

potty training my 20 month ds...tips welcome

I, personally, think that 20 months is very young and from what you describe it doesn't sound like he is ready yet. My daughter is 19 months and while she sometimes tells me before she is about to poop, I'm not planning to even attempt to potty train her until maybe 2 or 2.5. She will sit on the potty, but has never done anything. It is more to familiarize her with it than actually train her right now. We did the 3-day method with my son when he was a little over 3 and it was a breeze because he was ready. Potty training isn't really something you can force. When they are ready, they will be ready. Is there a specific reason you want to train him right now?

Re: potty training my 20 month ds...tips welcome

I was reading up on elimination communication and felt like I missed the boat on that since it should have been started in early months of life. But figured if my son can say "let's go islanders" then maybe it's time I get him to work on telling me when he has to pee or poop.

I know that in the US we are one of the slowest to potty train and seeing as they do it much earlier in other countries I felt that babies are in fact capable of it. I am coming more from a place of wanting to learn my sons cues and communications rather than wanting to force him to learn immediately. I don't want to pressure him...I just want to open up that communication. But I'd be lying if i said it was easy. I'll give that 3 day method a try and if it's really not working out I'll slow down so i don't stress us both out.

Here's an article that kind of explains EC:
http://www.salon.com/2010/07/09/extreme_potty_training/

Message edited 3/20/2013 11:35:06 AM.

potty training my 20 month ds...tips welcome

I dont think that it is too early but I agree with others that it might be not the right time yet. I would continue with getting your DS to communicate. I think the communication is half the battle.

Re: potty training my 20 month ds...tips welcome

I don't think it's too young
Dd is basically training herself . She's 20 months and every day is different . She started off just like your DS at about 18 months so I dropped it , didn't stress it . Then on her own she started asking to go. Some days are dry all day others she's too lazy . I just try to encourage her when she does ask and I tell her it's ok when she doesn't .

I started off with telling her no you can't go in your diaper , but then one day she cried because she didn't make it in time and it broke my heart , I was putting too much pressure on her . Try to make it fun ! We read books when she's on the potty , we sing , we count .

Good luck and just take it a day at a time

Re: potty training my 20 month ds...tips welcome

The best way to train is without a diaper. Definitely recommend the three day method!

Re: potty training my 20 month ds...tips welcome

At 22 months DS was already telling me about poop and pee and went a few times on the potty but nothing consistent. At his 2 year visit I asked the pediatrician and he said it was possible but that I would probably have to stay home for 1-2 weeks for it to click for him. He said no diapers was the way to go. We started potty training at 28 months and used the 3 day method successfully. DS was fully potty trained day and night within a week. I would not use food for positive reinforcement. DS was scared to use the toilet in the beginning so I bought sesame street finger puppets and we talked to his sesame street "friends" while he was sitting. I started off with giving him elmo and everytime he pooped in the toilet I would give him another finger puppet. His "friends" would do a whole hoopla whenever he peed or pooped. We started with sitting. After a week we switched to standing because he insisted after spending the afternoon with my MIL. my MIL told him it was easier to stand (without giving me the heads up). It was fine but she did it before he could differentiate between poop and pee sensation. It all worked out though.