Awkward question

Let me preface this by saying I've been to male and female OB-GYNs and have no preference. In fact, I've generally liked my male OB-GYNs better. And every single time I've had an unclothed exam from a male, there was always another woman in the room, usually a nurse.

But today, for the first time, I went for my first internal and my male OB examined me without anyone else in the room. DH wasn't in there, and there was no female nurse in there; just the two of us. He didn't do ANYTHING weird or ANYTHING to make me feel uncomfortable... but something about being examined by a male doctor without someone else in the room felt weird.

I thought it was a regulation that a male OB-GYN had to have someone else in the room during an unclothed exam. I guess I just assumed it because I've been seen by men at different practices for 14 years and that has been the case every single time. Was there supposed to be a lady in there? Should I have asked for one?

Again, I didn't feel like anything was "off" about the exam, but, I just didn't like it being me and him in the room with the door closed like that.

Re: Awkward question

My obgyn does the same thing. I am never nervous about it but could see how it could bother some people. Ask for the medical asst to be present next time.

Re: Awkward question

At my last office, there was always a female present.. which was weird to me, I felt odd having her standing there just to watch.

At my new office, when I sign in on their individual tear-off sheets there's a spot that that asks if I want someone else there for the exam.. I always say no.

It's personal preference though, so if you aren't comfortable, I'd speak up & ask for a nurse to be present next time or bring DH.

Re: Awkward question

Both my OB-GYN and my Uro-GYN performed all exams with a nurse present.

Re: Awkward question

My OB has never had a nurse in the room for an of my exams. Doesn't bother me at all. His wife is the nurse but she just puts me in the room and tells me to undress from the waist down and then he comes in. I actually never even thought about it until now.

Re: Awkward question

I guess it's just because I had it one way for literally 14 years, and at 4 different practices in Brooklyn and Long Island, I thought it was the norm to have a woman in there with you and the doc. Every doctor's office must be different.

Thanks for the responses! I feel better now.

Re: Awkward question

I think I would be more comfortable with a woman in the room. But if it was a OB that I have seen multiple times I probably would not have thought about it.

Re: Awkward question

Whenever I've worked with a male gyn they always need a chaparone in the room, just incase.

Me, I don't care. My new ob has a sign in tear off sheet and I always say no. Let her do something else instead of stand there.
That's just me though, I can understand how another woman would feel akward. Next time you sign in at the front desk, ask if a medical assistant can join you in the room.

Re: Awkward question

I never noticed before but now that you mention it, there is never a nurse in the exam room with me when my (male) OB does an exam either. I've never felt any weirdness about it though.

Re: Awkward question

I have been going to my current OB/GYN for 5 years now and he has never had anyone else in the room during exams. But I have been to another practice in the past that always had another person present. I guess since I have been going to him for a few years now, I forgot that some of them another person in the room.

Re: Awkward question

my fertility Dr is male and he did COUNTLESS internal sonos on me with no one else in the room

Re: Awkward question

i recently looked this up because my sono tech was a man at my 12 week and there was no one else in the room. Not an internal, but pants low down, shirt up, dark room, etc.

It's not law to have someone else in the room, but it does happen commonly probably mainly for malpractice, etc.

I would have felt the same as you in that instance as well.

Re: Awkward question

My RE is a man and ALWAYS has a female nurse in the room with him

My ob is also a man and NEVER has a female nurse in the room with him.

But it doesn't matter to me. But you should def say something next time if you have any question about being comfortable.

Re: Awkward question

I've been through 3 different OB/GYN practices, every single doctor was male and I can not think of one single occasion where a woman (or anyone else) was present in the room for an exam besides the doctor and me. That would honestly make me feel weirder. I never once felt uncomfortable, and I feel like having a female nurse or someone in the room just to "make sure nothing happens" is making it something it's not, and therefore creating weirdness. To me, that adds the dynamic of something potentially sexual to a routine medical process. That would make me feel more uncomfortable for sure.

Re: Awkward question

THe practice I go to has three women and one man and when a internal exam is done you have a girl come into the room with the OB. Even if the OB is a female. I don't like it either since the girl just kind of stands there. I feel like she is just staring, but they never are. I understand why they have someone in the room. There are some crazy people out in the world and you never know what they can make up.

Re: Awkward question

I go to a large practice so I see a few different doctors. There are two male dr's that always have a female in the room - 1 is new and right out of med school and the other is much older (about to retire) and his nurse once told me he does it bc of how easily someone can do a sexual suit or mal-practice. None of the other 6 male doctors every have anyone in there and it never bothers me.

Re: Awkward question

I think the doctor's do it mainly to cover their own azzes if you know what I mean..they want a witness present in case someone were to make false claims that they did something inappropriate.

I remember I had to go for a follow up visit for some surgery I had- and all the Dr was going to do was look at my incisions...I was not naked in the least- just pulled my shirt up so he could see my belly- but he called a female nurse in the room to be there. And that wasn't even close to an internal exam.

I don't think thye HAVE to have it- I think some do and some don't.
But I am sure you can ask for it if you are not comfortable.

Re: Awkward question

In most cases I think I have always had a second person in the room. My understanding is its to cover the doctor's a** if in case someone claims something. I personally feel like a circus freak with the second person there.