BFNers....Was there anything you think that contributed?

Most BFNs are due to circumstances way beyond our knowledge or control. But for some BFNs, aside from clear medical causes, we can pinpoint what might have contributed (anovulatory cycle, performed OPK wrong, poor BD timing, over stressed, really poor diet, some antibiotics, hormone levels, changes in BFing patterns, etc.). So, for the BFNs where you feel like you know or suspect what went wrong, please share your experiences and ideas. There's always so much info on what can get you pregnant. Maybe this can help us compile a list of strategies to avoid.

Re: BFNers....Was there anything you think that contributed?

I know in the past we didn't BD enough, I was gung ho, DH not so much. I think we had a better chance this month, so we'll see. I also need to lose weight and joined WW this month. But even with perfect timing, and Oing, you only have about a 20% chance.

Re: BFNers....Was there anything you think that contributed?

We will be going onto our 10th month soon. For the first 4 months I was still BFing, and I thought that that may have been hindering my chances. After speaking with my RE, I was assured that as long as I was having a cycle I was able to get pregnant, so in truth the BFing should not have been the reason for getting the BFN's. We have been BD a lot and using OPK's so I don't think not BD enough or at the right times has been hindering us either. We just started seeing an RE so I haven't gotten the results of DH's SA or my bloodwork back yet, but I have a suspicion that it may be my hormone levels that are out of whack. Stress may also be a culprit for us, but each month without a BFP just increases my stress level.

Message edited 1/30/2011 11:59:32 AM.

Re: BFNers....Was there anything you think that contributed?

aside from not at the right time, i dont think you can ever know why it didnt work. thinking that we have control over these things is what makes people crazy. every average cycle the chances of a BFP are 25% or less, depending on your age. assuming you know when you ovulate FOR SURE (ie. youve either temped and have a proven consistent O time, or you have had a doctor confirm O, or have a cycle thats regular to the day and consistent OPKs during those cycles), all you can do is and . all the other "things" you can do really won't change whether sperm meets and egg and embryo implants, so you will drive yourself crazy trying to figure out how to do something that is beyond your control.

that all being said ill get off my and just say that the biggest mistake people make is assuming they O at a specific time without putting the effort in to finding out for sure.

Message edited 1/30/2011 12:18:57 PM.

Re: BFNers....Was there anything you think that contributed?

I have no idea this month. We did an IUI and BD'd at the perfect times so who knows.
I didn't really feel stressed.
DH has MF issues so that's probably our main reason or just the sheer fact that your overall chances are what? 25% so that's a pretty good chance each month of NOT getting pregnant even doing it all perfect.

Re: BFNers....Was there anything you think that contributed?

I think mine are def. not scheduling at the right time. Im hoping that thats all..

Re: BFNers....Was there anything you think that contributed?

Posted by bettybcafe

I think mine are def. not scheduling at the right time. Im hoping that thats all..

Re: BFNers....Was there anything you think that contributed?

my reason is the same..i am not ovulating onm y own so know matter what our bd schedule is or all the tricks i try if there is no egg no way to fertalize it

we r moving onto iui's

Re: BFNers....Was there anything you think that contributed?

Definitely not at the right time. I only used OPK for two cycles and since then have guessed when I'd be O'ing. Now I know from others, that the day can vary from cycle to cycle so I'm going to try the OPK every cycle until I get a BFP.

Re: BFNers....Was there anything you think that contributed?

Bad luck

Re: BFNers....Was there anything you think that contributed?

Last month was my first month ttc and as it turns out I didn't O when i thought i was, so i BD on the wrong days....On to month two!

Re: BFNers....Was there anything you think that contributed?

I don't think we BD enough and I might only caught the tail end of the surge

Re: BFNers....Was there anything you think that contributed?

Maybe we didnt BD enough, I was on top most of the time because DH has a cast on his leg ( I know awkward), I didnt sit there long enough with legs up?, we used lube sometimes (not preseed) and i dont know...It wasnt in the stars last month...

Re: BFNers....Was there anything you think that contributed?

Honestly.. a BFN doesn't mean you did anything wrong

i think it's this sort of thinking that makes people go nuts. When you do all the 'right' things, you still only have a 20-25% chance of fertilization and implantation succeeding.

I wholeheartedly agree with FlowerWife's post as well.

Re: BFNers....Was there anything you think that contributed?

Posted by Jenny614

Maybe we didnt BD enough, I was on top most of the time because DH has a cast on his leg ( I know awkward), I didnt sit there long enough with legs up?, we used lube sometimes (not preseed) and i dont know...It wasnt in the stars last month...

Re: BFNers....Was there anything you think that contributed?

Message edited 1/31/2011 7:56:28 PM.

Re: BFNers....Was there anything you think that contributed?

Posted by Grill

Honestly.. a BFN doesn't mean you did anything wrong.
i think it's this sort of thinking that makes people go nuts. When you do all the 'right' things, you still only have a 20-25% chance of fertilization and implantation succeeding.
I wholeheartedly agree with FlowerWife's post as well.

I too agree that we can't control everything, as stated in the OP. However, as indicated by some of the responses so far, as well as, my own experiences, there are some months where we can identify potential reasons why it didn't work. That is all that this post is asking for. It is not meant to be answered by those who "did all the right things". It's meant to be a guide from those of us who didn't. I hope that helps to clarify.