Need your opinions

Hi All,

I'm in need of some opinions. Here's the situation:

DH and I have been TTC for 6 months. We haven't told anyone (with the excpetion of my sister, who is local and my best friend)

DH was talking to his mom last week and slipped and told her we've been ttc. DH's sister has been struggling with IF for years. She's been through many attempts to get PG. MIL asked if we were going to tell SIL.

What do you think? If you were my SIL and going through IF would you want to know?

I want to be as sensitive to her situation as possible and I'm not sure what the "right" thing to do is.

thanks ladies!

Re: Need your opinions

I wouldn't want to know

Re: Need your opinions

i have been thinking about this one - i read it when you first posted...

i wouldn't share. She has been struggling for years and while yes, 6 months is a VERY long time to us and you...there is a chance it won't be to her...

Re: Need your opinions

Hi,
Here is an opinion from someone with IF.
I would want to know that you are TTC so that when it happens I would be prepared (well, as prepared as you can be).
For example when I knew my sister was TTC and I was dealing with IF and she got pregnant, I was happy for her and glad she didn't have to endure what I do. THEN she got pregnant the next year without telling me she was even TTC (as far as I knew she was done) and that was very hard to deal with. It hit me from left field, KWIM? I had some very angry reactions.

So depending on your relationship it might be better to let her know so she can deal with it her own way.
Good luck to you on your TTC jourmey!
Shawnna

Re: Need your opinions

Posted by davenjess

i have been thinking about this one - i read it when you first posted...

i wouldn't share. She has been struggling for years and while yes, 6 months is a VERY long time to us and you...there is a chance it won't be to her...

Message edited 10/18/2008 5:32:31 PM.

Re: Need your opinions

Re: Need your opinions

Posted by Soon2BeTTC

Posted by davenjess

i have been thinking about this one - i read it when you first posted...

i wouldn't share. She has been struggling for years and while yes, 6 months is a VERY long time to us and you...there is a chance it won't be to her...

I know 6 months is nothing...I've been with DH while she's gone through many of the treatments....I know what a tough road it has been.

I'm just wondering would you rather be "prepared" and not have it come as a surprise?

I'm so torn.

Thanks for your response Jess!

Re: Need your opinions

Like Shawnna, I also have been dealing with IF. I agree that personally, if I knew, it would not come as a huge surprise and I would be prepared. But, since I have been dealing with IF, I am used to everyone being PG except me. I am not really affected by PG announcements. That is not the case for everyone and I do not know how your SIL is.

However, deciding to tell someone that you are TTC is very personal and you should not feel obligated to share that information.

Also, if you announce you are PG, it really may not come out of left field for her. Even though I did not know per se that certain people in my and DH's family were TTC, it was no shock when they announced their pregnancy.

You also don't have to make any big announcement to her. If you want and think its best, maybe your MIL can slip that she knows or suspects that you are TTC.

Sorry for not really giving you a clear answer - but I just wanted to give you some perspective from someone dealing with IF

Re: Need your opinions

Posted by KrisT

You also don't have to make any big announcement to her. If you want and think its best, maybe your MIL can slip that she knows or suspects that you are TTC.

Sorry for not really giving you a clear answer - but I just wanted to give you some perspective from someone dealing with IF

Re: Need your opinions

Thanks ladies.

DH and I decided to tell SIL. It was important that if SIL were to find out that it came from us and not anyone else. She was fine about it. I think she may have figured we would be starting to TTC soon anyway so I don't think it was any big surprise.

I really appreciate all of your input!