Are you the type who always has a "plan"

Hit enter WAYYY too fast - sorry!

I feel like my whole life I have had a plan. With my first son I wanted him to be born in the early summer months because of so many reasons - and he was. It took us about 3 months to conceive him.

Now, this time around, I promised myself I would not get crazy - but it's too late for that. Last month I told myself an early May baby would be great. Now, an early June. I'm already thinking of reasons why a July baby would be fantastic - but the bottom line is that I would love a baby any month it happens.

So - my question is - do you feel it is so hard dealing with TTC since it really is so out of our hands. I almost feel like it is consuming me again. I don't want to plan vacations for next year because I am hoping to be pregnant. I am thinking about so much - but yet who knows how long it can take this time around. Please help a complete control freak deal with something so out of her control!

Message edited 10/5/2008 8:38:32 PM.

Re: Are you the type who always has a "plan"

You are too much of a planner.... just like me!

I understand where you are coming from though.

Re: Are you the type who always has a "plan"

Absolutely! When we first started TTC we wanted a Spring baby and figured as a teacher I could take the rest of the school year off. Obviously things don't always work as planned. But I have realized that plans for something like this are not under our control and we need to take what we are given.

Re: Are you the type who always has a "plan"

I am definitely a planner.

Unfortunately, nothing about TTC has gone as planned.

We originally started TTC in September of 2007, thinking we'd get pregnant right away and have a summer baby. Well, it's been over a year now and we're still not pregnant!

I've learned though this whole process that I need to give up the control and go with the flow. Live by the cliches! What's mean to be will be, everything happens for reason, etc.

It's quite possibly the hardest thing I've ever had to do - but somehow, I just do it.

Re: Are you the type who always has a "plan"

I feel exactly the same way... We are trying for our first and really haven't officially started yet (I just began charting last month and this month will be our first "official" month) but I am already feeling very out of control of the whole situation. I think alot of it for me is that my cycles have always been long and irregular so it makes it even harder to "plan"... Last week I caught a glimpse of one of those calendars that tell you how many days are left in the year and in my head I thought "omg thats only x number of cycles"... then I took a step back and realized I HAVE to relax so that I don't make myself nuts, easier said than done of course

Re: Are you the type who always has a "plan"

i am HUGE planner...it's why i liked planning our wedding so much - i was in control of everything...and then i let it all go to our planner on the day of (who just so happens to be DIVA!!!).

I know that's why ttc'ing wrecked me mentally...i like to know what's coming, when it's coming, etc...and it bothers me when i don't....so i feel ya on this!!!

Re: Are you the type who always has a "plan"

i am a huge planner in other areas of my life... in fact, my husband jokes that i have OCD! but TTC is one area where i am not hung up on a plan. perhaps it's because i come from a religious perspective on the whole thing, but honestly, it's not in my hands. I have no control in this. yes, i have to do things like BD on certain days and know when i ovulated and take my pre-natals, but even that is not a definite. IMO, TTC is God's plan, not ours and so whatever happens, happens.

Message edited 10/5/2008 10:23:21 PM.

Re: Are you the type who always has a "plan"

I am a huge planner. The current plan is to make it out of law school without getting pg (I graduate in May) and work 2-3 years before we start TTC. However, I always just assumed it would be an easy process to get pg, and now that I know that isn't always the case we might start earlier... but still not for another 2 years.

In the meantime, I'm trying to learn as much as I can

Re: Are you the type who always has a "plan"

I am not just a planner, I am a control freak! I hate not knowing what is going to happen. TTC is going to break me. I know it!

Re: Are you the type who always has a "plan"

I am a big time planner but unfortunately our plan is not going to work out. With male IF taking over our TTC lives, we are happy with whatever baby we can have.

I always wanted an early spring baby so that I would not have to be too pregnant in the heat of the summer & this way the baby & I could enjoy a lot of outside time. With our IVF schedule coming soon, it looks like I will have a late summer/early fall baby if all goes well! At this point, DH & I feel blessed to just have that miracle!

I have learned that there are just some things you can't plan! But in the end all that matters is that you have a happy & healthy baby!!!!

Re: Are you the type who always has a "plan"

I'm a huge planner, but realized too quickly that this is something I can't control.

Re: Are you the type who always has a "plan"

Posted by MrsPowers

Absolutely! When we first started TTC we wanted a Spring baby and figured as a teacher I could take the rest of the school year off. Obviously things don't always work as planned. But I have realized that plans for something like this are not under our control and we need to take what we are given.

Re: Are you the type who always has a "plan"

I am a complete planner. I really want to get preggo this month so I will have the baby when I'm off in the summer because I don't get maternity leave. I only had 3 weeks off when DS was born.

Re: Are you the type who always has a "plan"

Major planner. Lets see I wanted spring babies so I could be off for the summer I have 2! One 4/19 and the other 4/29.

I decided for a later baby this time so we will see how it works out.

I hate the entire TTC process since it isn't 100% in my control.

Re: Are you the type who always has a "plan"

DH and I are big planners... to know what the future holds!

Re: Are you the type who always has a "plan"

I am a planner and a complete control freak which is why TTC was so hard for me. It actually made me feel better when we started with the RE last year because there was a definate plan ahead of me and being in such a controlled environment was the ideal place for me. Obviously, I would have rathered gotten pregnant the natural way, but since I couldn't, being with the RE actually helped keep alot of the stress of TTC away. It was nice to be with my husband because we wanted to and not because I was ovulating!

Re: Are you the type who always has a "plan"

DH is a planner, I'm a control freak -

The only thing you can 'plan' when it comes to having a baby is to stop trying to NOT get pregnant.

I really thought it was going to make me absolutely crazy - but it honestly didn't. I really had no other choice but to accept the fact that I just COULDN'T control it .....

Re: Are you the type who always has a "plan"

OMG I'm an obsessive planner. You shoulda seen me on LIW!

I have a hard time dealing with the fact that I can't control this...especially when I wanted to time it so perfectly to the school year. But as everyone has told me time and time again...you can plan all you want- it's gonna happen when it's gonna happen!

Re: Are you the type who always has a "plan"

Used to be a huge planner,then I realized that the most important plans I made always blew up in my face. Now, I have to say, I try go with the flow a lot more.