Uncooperative Husbands (Personal in nature)

Am I the only woman on here whose husband is just not cooperative with the whole ovulation/baby making thing. My husband claims he's only in the mood in the morning and too tired on weekday mornings to take part, this leaves only weekend mornings for baby making. If I happen to be ovulating on a weeknight I tell him as soon as he gets home and he promises to save some time for us later in the evening, but by the time we're ready for bed he claims to be too tired. When I tell him how important it is to have sex while I'm ovulating, he gets all defensive and tells me that I'm only using him for his sperm. In his defense, each time he does eventually cave and does his part, but it's gotten to the point where I'm scared to tell him when I'm ovulating. Ahhh...I just needed to vent. Any other ladies out there with this problem? Sometimes I just want to take the computer out of the house so he'll stop checking his damn e-mails and working on his lesson plans.

Re: Uncooperative Husbands (Personal in nature)

vent away!!

my husband is uncooperative sometimes... he wants a baby so bad.. but he just doesnt GET the whole BD schedule and how important it is to BD on certain days... almost like he could be a little more serious with TTC... but finally he did say this the other day.. his whole thing is... i got pregnant so easy the first time.. i will be fast this time too... well its not.. he is just in another world sometimes


hang in there! it will get through to him... it finally did with my DH

Re: Uncooperative Husbands (Personal in nature)

Some guys are funny...Maybe he's acting like this because subconsciously he feels pressured to perform? Rather than telling him when you're Oing, have you tried just "attacking" him on those nights? In other words, don't ask him to BD or tell him how important it is that he does (I think that puts pressure on some guys), but maybe just try to seduce him instead (with no mention of babies)?

Message edited 9/11/2008 3:16:15 PM.

Re: Uncooperative Husbands (Personal in nature)

Maybe he's not really ready to TTC. Before my DH was ready- I would try to just "attack" him- and he would give me every excuse in the book not to BD. Maybe you should talk to him about this, and make sure he really is on board. If he is- tell him then he has no choice but to BD on the O days- because if you don't you don't stand a chance.

Re: Uncooperative Husbands (Personal in nature)

No. We've already discussed this. He says it's just that he's overworked and is only in the mood on the weekends. When I have convinced him to do it on weeknights he basically passes out afterward and goes to sleep. This isn't anything new, he's always been a weekends only man, but now it's a problem with the whole ovulation thing.

Re: Uncooperative Husbands (Personal in nature)

DH wasn't quite on board on with TTC. He would get upset if I wanted to buy ovulation kits or was tracking my cycles online. For whatever reason, it seemed to really turn him off.

Not to sound vulgar but could you try wearing something sexy and perhaps doing some oral? I don't think any guy can resist that, tired or not.

Re: Uncooperative Husbands (Personal in nature)

mine is. he talks about wanting a baby all the time but when it comes to the time to do it, he gets tired quickly. We have yet to be able to do it 2 days in a row. I really want to try the every other day thing next cycle, but I know he'll throw in the towel too soon. Ugh, it's frustrating, and to tell you the truth it's too much for me also. And when you both don't want to do it, than it's not gonna happen.

Re: Uncooperative Husbands (Personal in nature)

before we had to go the IUI route I didn't even tell him when I thought I would be ovulating...when it was during the 'scheduled' time, I would maybe send him some interesting texts during the day or start a few days ahead of time telling him I had the sexiest dream about him, stuff like that. Yes, I tricked him into having sex when I was ovulating.



Unfortunately we found out we had IF issues, so it was for nothing. the one thing that's great about the IUI is that there is no pressure to have sex on the right day...he has one job to do on the morning of the IUI...I get to take the drugs. I think it's fair.

Re: Uncooperative Husbands (Personal in nature)

If you can, somehow, find humor in it...my DH calls those 5 very important days..."his job"....we t ry to make it fun....but sometimes, as my sister-in-law put it so nicely..."TTC is like one bad porno after another!" HAHA! I would say..make it funny..then the other nights are really for fun, no pressure...natural :)