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BellaRock
I am all the Me I will ever Be
Member since 5/06 9746 total posts
Name:
She who shall remain nameless
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Re: how do you find ways to not put pressure on yourselves?
I agree about the porn. We watch it sometimes. Other times it doesn't have to be porn but shows on HBO like Real Sex or the Cathouse (its sort of like porn lol).
My DH has a beer or two after dinner and that usually gets him going.
My biggest problem is that DH is always tired. He works long hours and when we finally get DS to bed and have time for us DH is knocked out. Lately I have been letting him sleep for an hour then wake him up. But doing that means I have to do a lot of foreplay, which can be fun, but somedays I just want to do it and be done with it.
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Posted 8/25/08 12:05 PM  |
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Long Island Weddings
Long Island's Largest Bridal Resource |
JennyPenny
?
Member since 1/08 12702 total posts
Name:
Jen
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Re: how do you find ways to not put pressure on yourselves?
Posted by davenjess
he knew without me saying anything that i am o'ing...as i (prepare for overshare) - get VERY moist in that region at that time...and he says he can't feel anything and get any friction...hence the failure to complete.
i'm on the verge of tears today, real bad, i'm afraid if anyone here asks how my weekend was, i'll burst into tears...
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| Posted 8/25/08 12:10 PM |
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EricaAlt
LIF Adult
Member since 7/08 22665 total posts
Name:
Erica
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Re: how do you find ways to not put pressure on yourselves?
Posted by BellaRock
I agree about the porn. We watch it sometimes. Other times it doesn't have to be porn but shows on HBO like Real Sex or the Cathouse (its sort of like porn lol).
My DH has a beer or two after dinner and that usually gets him going.
My biggest problem is that DH is always tired. He works long hours and when we finally get DS to bed and have time for us DH is knocked out. Lately I have been letting him sleep for an hour then wake him up. But doing that means I have to do a lot of foreplay, which can be fun, but somedays I just want to do it and be done with it.
I know how you feel. DH does construction so he's exhausted at the end of the day. Plus, comes home and will do some work on the house. I'll go on the treadmill or something while he's working and working out is the best for keeping a positive attitude. I feel sexier after too... sweating a bit.  I like Skin-a-max also. Not as hardcore. Has a little more story line to it and the girls aren't so raunchy looking
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| Posted 8/25/08 12:12 PM |
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IrishLasss334
I'll be there soon!
Member since 1/08 6549 total posts
Name:
Patty
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Re: how do you find ways to not put pressure on yourselves?
Deanna,
Even if it's gardening, reorganizing your kitchen cabinets, your closets, dresser drawers etc. anything to keep you busy.
I have emptied out every closet in my house, cleaned out the basement, etc.
It definitely helps!
Good luck!
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| Posted 8/25/08 12:17 PM |
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MetsGirl07
LIF O2 Vendor
Member since 12/07 16202 total posts
Name:
Deanna
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Re: how do you find ways to not put pressure on yourselves?
Posted by IrishLass
Deanna,
Even if it's gardening, reorganizing your kitchen cabinets, your closets, dresser drawers etc. anything to keep you busy.
I have emptied out every closet in my house, cleaned out the basement, etc.
It definitely helps!
Good luck!
yea its a great idea! something to keep me busy! 
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| Posted 8/25/08 12:24 PM |
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MetsGirl07
LIF O2 Vendor
Member since 12/07 16202 total posts
Name:
Deanna
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Re: how do you find ways to not put pressure on yourselves?
Posted by EricaAlt
Posted by BellaRock
I agree about the porn. We watch it sometimes. Other times it doesn't have to be porn but shows on HBO like Real Sex or the Cathouse (its sort of like porn lol).
My DH has a beer or two after dinner and that usually gets him going.
My biggest problem is that DH is always tired. He works long hours and when we finally get DS to bed and have time for us DH is knocked out. Lately I have been letting him sleep for an hour then wake him up. But doing that means I have to do a lot of foreplay, which can be fun, but somedays I just want to do it and be done with it.
I know how you feel. DH does construction so he's exhausted at the end of the day. Plus, comes home and will do some work on the house. I'll go on the treadmill or something while he's working and working out is the best for keeping a positive attitude. I feel sexier after too... sweating a bit. I like Skin-a-max also. Not as hardcore. Has a little more story line to it and the girls aren't so raunchy looking
yea i agree with both of you ladies.. my husband gets very tired too from working.. he has to wake up at 4:30 every morning so by the time he comes home he is so exhausted.
i think another problem is we wait too late.to BD. . i want to try to change that as well. maybe try after dinner sometime.
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| Posted 8/25/08 12:26 PM |
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sleepie76
enjoying every minute
Member since 12/07 3881 total posts
Name:
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Re: how do you find ways to not put pressure on yourselves?
I think the date night is a great idea.
maybe he comes home to a nice dinner, candles, bottle of wine, some nice lingerie.
if you make it about something else, maybe the fact that you are Oing will disappear for a little bit.
As for distracting yourself :
after my 2nd miscarriage, I painted the room that would have been the nursery. it was a plain beige that I had never touched with the idea it would be redone as the nursery. That room was a constant reminder... so I painted it purple. A deep purple! Redid it as a spare bedroom/computer room. It didn't remind me anymore and took it off my mind.
Ofcourse when it comes time to repaint, that purple is gonna be a biotch to paint over
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| Posted 8/26/08 8:18 AM |
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ETAB
Mother Mary Pray for us
Member since 7/07 2052 total posts
Name:
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Re: how do you find ways to not put pressure on yourselves?
Posted by davenjess
he knew without me saying anything that i am o'ing...as i (prepare for overshare) - get VERY moist in that region at that time...and he says he can't feel anything and get any friction...hence the failure to complete.
i'm on the verge of tears today, real bad, i'm afraid if anyone here asks how my weekend was, i'll burst into tears...
I am so sorry you are feeling this way... it is so hard..... we just put so much pressure on ourselves and when life gets in the way of our most "fertile" time it is so upsetting.... i
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| Posted 8/26/08 8:26 AM |
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SummerMiracle
LIF Toddler
Member since 7/08 465 total posts
Name:
Brianne (Bri)
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Re: how do you find ways to not put pressure on yourselves?
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| Posted 8/26/08 8:13 PM |
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TCOMF09
LIF Adult
Member since 7/07 1086 total posts
Name:
Laura
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Re: how do you find ways to not put pressure on yourselves?
This cycle I took a totally stress free approach. I got AF, jumped online & ordered more PreSeed & CBEFM. Then let it go.
There's nothing you can do while you have AF so just relax that week. It just so happened the following week I was on vacation, so I wasn't on the computer & spent the week enjoying my time off of everything - including TTC! The following week was my O week. We BD only on the peak days & just let it be.
It totally helped that I accepted when I got AF & moved on. It also helped tremendously having a vacation...if only I could have a week off every month. 
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| Posted 8/26/08 8:20 PM |
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StressedNoMore
LIF Toddler
Member since 6/05 493 total posts
Name:
Christine
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Re: how do you find ways to not put pressure on yourselves?
Don't make it like you have to just to try... if you just find the days you have to BDing and make it fun, I find that stress + pressure = no baby... relax and have fun with it...
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| Posted 8/29/08 9:24 AM |
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MetsGirl07
LIF O2 Vendor
Member since 12/07 16202 total posts
Name:
Deanna
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Re: how do you find ways to not put pressure on yourselves?
Posted by StressedNoMore
Don't make it like you have to just to try... if you just find the days you have to BDing and make it fun, I find that stress + pressure = no baby... relax and have fun with it...
i know, its so true.. and i have to get this into my head!!
i totally agree with you!
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| Posted 8/29/08 9:34 AM |
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donegal419
St. Gerard, pray for us.
Member since 7/07 7650 total posts
Name:
K
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Re: how do you find ways to not put pressure on yourselves?
honestly, by not going on this board too frequently. i know everyone here is supportive and kind, but it almost makes me a little crazy. preseed oil, bding with your legs up, temping, POAS, not POAS, taking Mucinex, etc. etc. etc. etc.
everyone has ideas that they THINK has worked for them, but everyone's body is different and reading all these things makes my head spin sometimes and it really makes me feel like i'll never get pregnant so i try to avoid lurking too much.
does this make sense? and nothing against ANYONE of you of course, but does anyone KWIM?
Message edited 8/29/2008 3:07:04 PM.
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| Posted 8/29/08 3:05 PM |
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MetsGirl07
LIF O2 Vendor
Member since 12/07 16202 total posts
Name:
Deanna
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Re: how do you find ways to not put pressure on yourselves?
Posted by donegal419
honestly, by not going on this board too frequently. i know everyone here is supportive and kind, but it almost makes me a little crazy. preseed oil, bding with your legs up, temping, POAS, not POAS, taking Mucinex, etc. etc. etc. etc.
everyone has ideas that they THINK has worked for them, but everyone's body is different and reading all these things makes my head spin sometimes and it really makes me feel like i'll never get pregnant so i try to avoid lurking too much.
does this make sense? and nothing against ANYONE of you of course, but does anyone KWIM?
of course i know what you mean!!
i posted a thread on this exact topic!!
that maybe i should just shy away from the boards and not the actual TTC process.. that i am too obsessed and everything gets into my head !!
but of course i am still on here all day!
my problem is, i work all day at a computer and i have ALOT of downtime.. i cant figure out what else to do to keep me occupied..
it just stinks too because i know its probably a BIG reason why im like this, but i do LOVE The girls on here , they are all so wonderful .. its so hard!!
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| Posted 8/29/08 3:10 PM |
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