Would you hire a babysitter outside your family?

I'm thinking about hiring a babysitter outside my family for my 18 month old twins. I never thought I would do this, but every time I ask my family they usually have something going on or an excuse. I know my mom would do it, but she is very ill. My husband I and never go out for date nights, maybe every 4-5 months and its so hard to get someone to babysit. I think we are overdue for some adult time away from the babies. We've been arguing a lot and he says I never have time for him.

So, I joined Care.com to search for a babysitter and babysitters are getting back to my post, but all of sudden I'm afraid to go through with it.

I think my kids may be too young, because they can't express if she did anything to them or ignored them.

Would you hire a babysitter outside your family? If you did how did it work out?

Re: Would you hire a babysitter outside your family?

I have an 18m old son so I totally get it, I would be weary too. I wouldn't love the idea but if I had no family option yes I think I would. Just for a couple hours at first and see how it goes. Personally I would prefer someone recommended then from care.com

Would you hire a babysitter outside your family?

Yes, definitely!

Would you hire a babysitter outside your family?

I would hire a babysitter outside my family but i persoally would try to get a recommendation from a co-worker, or even a neighbor first so it someone somebody knows at least. That would be more comforting to me

Re: Would you hire a babysitter outside your family?

I can't do it.
I don't trust anyone in my home who is a stranger and I certainly dont' trust them with my DD.
You just never know.
Also- at 2.5 DD won't stay with a stranger. She is old enough to know the difference.
If it's not a family memeber that she spends a lot of time with- or a teacher from daycare- she wouldn't be comfortable alone with them.
I wouldn't be able to relax.
So for now, it's just my parents and sister who can watch her.
We rarely get out alone but I don't care.
I was never big into "date" nights.
We are married- we don't date anymore!

Message edited 4/20/2013 2:13:42 PM.

Re: Would you hire a babysitter outside your family?

We live OOS and had no family nearby so the need came. We used sitter.com I think or something similar to that. I posted an ad but wound up not using any of the applicants and did an individual search based on distance, experience, references, etc... and sent them a private message to see if they were interested. The first girl I found was perfect on paper but didn't feel like we were clicking so didn't call her back after the first babysitting job. Then I found a college aged girl who was an education major and lived close by. After interviewing her (with my daughters), checking her references, doing a background check and then just going with my gut feeling we took another chance and hired her, first going on short outings (just dinner, as in inhaling our meals then leaving, LOL). We checked in with her a lot in the beginning and slowly started to relax when going out. She's been babysitting for us for almost 3 years now and my girls absolutely love her.

Also, she started watching them when they were 3.5yrs and 6months old.

Message edited 4/20/2013 4:07:47 PM.

Would you hire a babysitter outside your family?

I would do it however I would probably get someone that was recommended to me or someone that works at dd daycare center as opposed to online, perhaps have them come for an hour while you are home and watch how they interact with your twins then if you are comfortable use them to go out.

Re: Would you hire a babysitter outside your family?

Yes. I plan to hire my teenage neighbor when DD gets a little older.

Re: Would you hire a babysitter outside your family?

Posted by NervousNell

I can't do it.
I don't trust anyone in my home who is a stranger and I certainly dont' trust them with my DD.
You just never know.
Also- at 2.5 DD won't stay with a stranger. She is old enough to know the difference.
If it's not a family memeber that she spends a lot of time with- or a teacher from daycare- she wouldn't be comfortable alone with them.
I wouldn't be able to relax.
So for now, it's just my parents and sister who can watch her.
We rarely get out alone but I don't care.
I was never big into "date" nights.
We are married- we don't date anymore!

Re: Would you hire a babysitter outside your family?

I was fortunate enough to find two great girls that babysit from the daycare Both of my daughters go to. They are not family, but I have grown to trust them with my girls so that makes it easier to leave them in their hands

Re: Would you hire a babysitter outside your family?

Yes, i use my brother inlaws ex girlfriend. She was around when my DS was born, and briefly when my DD was born. I think it's nice to have them get used to other people besides family. Plus, it's always a burden on my inlaws when we ask them to watch the kids. (my family doesn't live around here).

Would you hire a babysitter outside your family?

Yes. We are oos and no family around. I hired 1 from sitter city. She was great but she was t available when I needed her. So I stopped calling. Another one actually put an ad on my buildings site and I called. I did an extensive search on her and loved her but she moved away. I found another through my friends sitter and loved her as well but she's not as available either. But we use her when we can.

It's the best thing we have done. It's so nice to go to a nice dinner.

As a adult, mothr, wife I need some time to myself and dh and friends. There's nothing wrong with a sitter. I babysat all the time. Dd was about 11/2 when we finally bit the bullet and got a sitter. She be set had a problem and actually loves when they come. When we first started with the sites she would be sleeping when they came.

Message edited 4/20/2013 11:11:46 PM.

Would you hire a babysitter outside your family?

I do, but its my best friends sister who I've known 10+ yrs.

Before this situation worked out I was actively looking on care.com, I just can't believe what some people are asking for pay-wise on that site....

Would you hire a babysitter outside your family?

Our kids go to Day Care PT but we do have a ped nurse that babysits for us periodically. I have no problem leaving my kids with her.

Re: Would you hire a babysitter outside your family?

Yes I used care.com. I called multiple references and had her come a few times before I left her alone with them. I love her and don't think twice about leaving them.

Re: Would you hire a babysitter outside your family?

That's all that I have. I am very lucky in that I have 3 great baby-sitters. I use 1 all the time. The 2nd one used to use all the time before she left for college. Now I use her on weekends as a backup. She will be going away with us in November. The 3rd is #1's BFF. She is great and has helped me in a pinch. I found all 3 through people I know and they are one way or another related.
I have no family around me so I really don't have a choice.

Re: Would you hire a babysitter outside your family?

I have a 4yo DD. And I am a nervous nelly about getting outside help. I am in a similar situation as you. We have my MIL who is willing and has maybe 5 times. But, they have in and out traffic from guest all the time, which doesn't sit well with my husband and with me for that matter. Maybe, with baby #2 on the way, we will loosen up a bit. Time will tell.

Re: Would you hire a babysitter outside your family?

Depending on where you are, I have teenage cousin who babysits for us if you are interested I can give you her info.

Re: Would you hire a babysitter outside your family?

Yes. I use 3 girls. 2 daughters of coworkers and one girl down the block. All responsible and took the babysitting class.

ETA: I also had a very hard time getting pregnant and my DC also comes first

Message edited 4/21/2013 11:01:17 AM.

Would you hire a babysitter outside your family?

Yep, I have. I had them come to interview with my kids there to see how they interacted with them. I did reference checks etc and basically trusted my gut. If something seemed "off" with them or we got a bad/weird vibe, then we crossed them off the list, even if they had stellar references.

I found that those outside family tended to follow our instructions much more rigidly than my MIL or other family members did. Family seems more comfortable blowing off what we say because "their kids are fine" etc.

Re: Would you hire a babysitter outside your family?

Re: Would you hire a babysitter outside your family?

Yes and I do. She started as a senior in high school when my son was like 7 months. Now she's in college but I harass her the moment she gets home on break. She's terrific. My son loves her.

Would you hire a babysitter outside your family?

Yes. I have a babysitter that works with my mother at a preschool. She started watching DS when he was 10 months old, so that DH & I could get a night out alone or with friends. We used her twice a month on average. DS loves her. Now that I have DS # 2, I haven't been out being he is only 4 weeks old. But I plan on using her in late May when I go to my BFF's bachelorette party & DH will be at the bachelor party. We use my parents & in laws too, but I don't like to use them if it is going to be a late night since I know they themselves like to be in bed on the early side.

Re: Would you hire a babysitter outside your family?

I think this is a personal question that you have to ask yourself. I know many people that do and many that don't. YOu have to do what you are comfortable with. In the end, it doesn't matter what anyone else would do.

Myself, no, I would not if my kids were 18 mos old. I do have family around but, it's hard enough to get them to watch my kids when I need them so there are very few "date nights." Honestly, it doesn't bother us - the kids go to bed and we can get take out, rent a movie, have some wine...and, we have peace of mind. Me personally, I wouldn't enjoy a date night if my kids were home with pretty much anyone other than my family...I'd be worried every second.

That said, when my youngest is 5 - at that point I think I would be fine with it. Younger than that and I wouldn't. As a SAHM I see nanny's and babysitters ALOT around town and that has pretty much sealed the deal for me that until my child can tell me exactly what goes on and is old enough to be pretty self sufficient - they won't be left with a stranger.

Re: Would you hire a babysitter outside your family?

Thank you all for your input. I'm going to ask my BF who she uses, but most of my friends or family that has kids use a family member. I think I may feel better if she was recommeded, but I'm very temped now to interview one on care.com, because she knows CPR and has other great qualifications. I guess I have to go with my gut.

Also, it took me 7 years to conceive my twins and they are my first priority and always come FIRST in my life. I don't think there is anything wrong with having adult time every once in a while.