ok... im stating MY OPINION HERE.... (long sorry)

and im sure some of you will be upset by what i have to say.... but im tired... im tired of people an companies making mom's feeling less of a woman!

I understand BF is great! i understand the benefits of the child having breast milk.. I 100% understand all of the benefits. BUT there are moms who tried an couldnt for what ever there reasons are.... could be childs poor latch, could be mother not producing, could be medical...... could be anything.

What i dont understand is why they insist on making you feel like crap because you had to use formula! You see it in advertisements... hospitals... friends.. etc.

You already have a ton of crap on your plate to worry about having your child. Where you look at your childs weight and have someone tell you well your child is smaller than mine because you didnt breastfeed...... You know what there are no studies out there that 100% proves that BF babies are "smarter" or "heavier" or has better "immune systems" Nothing is 100%!!!

SO all you moms out there that didnt breastfeed for whatever your reasons are you are still an amazing mom and dont let anyone tell you any diff! you did and are doing what YOU think is best!!!

sorry rant over.... this really just annoys me and i needed to get it off my chest!

Re: ok... im stating MY OPINION HERE.... (long sorry)

ITA

Re: ok... im stating MY OPINION HERE.... (long sorry)

ITA

Re: ok... im stating MY OPINION HERE.... (long sorry)

I'm not quite sure what made you want to post this - but I agree with you 100%.

I tried to breastfeed and had no milk, so I had to give up and give Lily formula. It was so difficult, and, a year later, it still brings tears to my eyes when I think about it.

I overheard a woman at the chiropractor's office yesterday talking about how she breastfeeds her son and how wonderful it is and how it cuts down on the chance of breats cancer, and how anyone who doesn't breastfeed is being selfish....and I wanted to smack her.

I think people, especially women, need to be a lot more understanding of the situations of others.

Re: ok... im stating MY OPINION HERE.... (long sorry)

thank you so much for posting this! I am sitting here with tears in my eyes, this is exactly what I needed tonight. Earlier I was feeling awful because I had all intentions of breastfeeding, but because I have to be on a bunch of diff meds, and the meds will get into the bm, I cant. I have felt horrible about it for days, and like I am not doing what I should be doing for my baby.

For the weight thing, he was born at 6lbs 6 oz, and yesterday at his 2 week check up he weighed 6 lbs 15 oz

Re: ok... im stating MY OPINION HERE.... (long sorry)

i think that you have every right to state your opinion, i def agree with you that the pressure to breast feed is def out there. I had mastatis and had to stop BFing when DS was only 2 weeks old, and truthfully after switching to formula, he was fine and did great!, i def think a baby who is formula feed can be just as smart and healthy as a breast feed baby!

Re: ok... im stating MY OPINION HERE.... (long sorry)

If you are talking about my post, it has nothing to do with you or mom who did not BFd or BFd either. Really!!

I don't think there is anything wrong with deciding what is right for you.

So if this is about the post, I just posted what I was told by peds and read. This is an average. Does that mean formula babies are smaller. No, they end up all levelling off to be about the same after several months. It's just the way they pill up on the Lbs at the beginning. It's not better or worse for them. That's just how it happens.

Trust me... I had my dose of comments on DS and HOW BIG he was. Being ask what I was feeding him. What kind of super milk I had.

And you know what... with all this BF is better.... the support system in "real" life is not there. Many companies don't have a private room for you to BF at work. You still hear about BFing in public. So all this talk is not being supported at all in real life.

Message edited 5/29/2008 10:08:49 PM.

Re: ok... im stating MY OPINION HERE.... (long sorry)

I do BF DS but he is supplemented with formula. I personally believe that you do whatever is best for your child and for you. There is no wrong way as long as your baby is healthy.

Re: ok... im stating MY OPINION HERE.... (long sorry)

it's interesting.....but for me, who BF'd exclusively-people seemed very judgemental towards me.

every time i went to the ped. i got formula i did not want or ask for. it was just handed over same thing in the hospital/

i got strange looks from my IL's and family when i had to go in another room to BF like it was "gross"

people were rude if i had to BF in public (covered up) staring

some would say-don't you want DH to help you with nighttime feedings? like i was nuts to take full feeding responsibility.

or i was asked:
when are you going to STOP BFing???? like it was a bad thing.
so i know where you are coming from,,, but just so you know, BFing moms get their share of opinions and negativity in some respect.

you do the best you can either way. i say who cares?-as long as your child is well taken care of and happy and healthy-you have done your job!

edited to add that although DD was BF'd she is a peanut at around 18lbs at almost a year!

Message edited 5/29/2008 10:21:51 PM.

Re: ok... im stating MY OPINION HERE.... (long sorry)

...coming from a mom of two who don't have recurring ear infections or whatever else is "caused" by not breastfeeding. I chose not to breastfeed because it did not feel nature to me, nor was I comfortable.

Oh and my formula fed 3 1/2 year old has basic reading skills. He has in no way been cheated or whatever by not being breastfed.

To each his own and just let the critics comments roll off your back!

Re: ok... im stating MY OPINION HERE.... (long sorry)

I am a BF mom and I agree with you as well.....there is so much pressure on moms, as my DH would say "the weight of the world"..... I will never judge a mom for BF or FF, its not my place or my business---and it does not impact if you are a "good mother" or not.

Message edited 5/29/2008 10:15:27 PM.

Re: ok... im stating MY OPINION HERE.... (long sorry)

I think no matter which you choose, some people think it is their right to judge

And it just isn't their right at all..

I am sooo sick of the judgemental a******'s of the world.

I am going to choose what is best for me and my child. Not anyone else! So should every mom

Message edited 5/29/2008 10:13:45 PM.

Re: ok... im stating MY OPINION HERE.... (long sorry)

Thank you so much for writing this. Still 2 yrs later I made to feel guilty for something I couldn't control. And have to hear others state that BF'ing is the best for the baby and if you don't do it the baby won't be as healthy, blah blah blah

Re: ok... im stating MY OPINION HERE.... (long sorry)

if we're being honest, I would have never tried to BF if not for all of those people who are so judgemental and critical about it. Just never thought it was for me, I got crap about it from my family b/c they thought it was gross. But I didn't want my son to not have top of the line anything. So I gave it a shot. Didn't work out. He was tonge-tied. And yet still I felt the guilt and pumped for 2 months and supplemented with formula. I was glad that i did it, don't get me wrong. But always felt judged if I ever said I wasn't going to BF.

That all being said, I'll give it another shot with the next one. Maybe it will be better. And if not I'm not going to stress about it too much.

I give credit for all of those woman who EBF. However, I also give credit to all incredible mothers out there. Formula, BF and both!!! We're all amazing. And so are our children.

Re: ok... im stating MY OPINION HERE.... (long sorry)

I guess you're damned if you do and damned if you don't. THat's people for ya. I see already that the comparing never ends. My friends are doing it already and my DS is only 8 months. Fact is...we're doing everything we can to raise our DC's and that's all! We love them and they love us. We feed them..they're healthy and growing...honeslty...BF or Formula...when DC is in their 20's...i don't think it will matter. What will matter is how much you show your love and support.

Re: ok... im stating MY OPINION HERE.... (long sorry)

Thank you for posting this.

I was told that the reason why my sisters and I were all overweight adults was because we were not breast fed.

It couldn't POSSIBLY have been because we were inactive or were fed family style with massive amounts of food from the time we could feed ourselves. NAAAAH that COULDN'T be it.

I say:

"Stay out of my friggin bra!"

(This post was brought to you by someone who is planning on giving BFing the old college try but ain't killing herself if it doesn't work out)

Re: ok... im stating MY OPINION HERE.... (long sorry)

I totally give credit to moms on both sides (if i ever have more i will def try again) I understand moms who ebf also get crap i feel for them too.

Re: ok... im stating MY OPINION HERE.... (long sorry)

I say:

"Stay out of my friggin bra!"

(This post was brought to you by someone who is planning on giving BFing the old college try but ain't killing herself if it doesn't work out)



see -i know you are kidding around and i think it is funny so i am not attacking in any way-but this is a very prevalent attitude people have towards BFing moms and it can be hurtful. not that you are doing this but so many other people comment on occasion that they think BFing is too sexually connected or just "gross". you cannot win i think whether you FF or BF
i think it is great you are even considering BFing and i think it's a great attitude to say i'll try but not put all the importance in the world on it if it doesn't work out!

Re: ok... im stating MY OPINION HERE.... (long sorry)

Thank You so much for posting this! DS is 3 weeks old, and I couldn't even try to BF him due to medication that I need to be on that would be passed to him through my milk. I have gotten many nasty comments- but I also know it goes both ways. FF or BF- we are all just trying to do what is best for our babies

Re: ok... im stating MY OPINION HERE.... (long sorry)

Re: ok... im stating MY OPINION HERE.... (long sorry)

Re: ok... im stating MY OPINION HERE.... (long sorry)

Well my 18 month old EBF baby is only in the 25% for weight so I would say the weight thing is not always true.


Happy Mommy=Happy Baby.

You do what works for you and tell everyone else to f*ck off if they don't like it!

Re: ok... im stating MY OPINION HERE.... (long sorry)

Posted by juanvi

Posted by ME75



I say:

"Stay out of my friggin bra!"

(This post was brought to you by someone who is planning on giving BFing the old college try but ain't killing herself if it doesn't work out)

see -i know you are kidding around and i think it is funny so i am not attacking in any way-but this is a very prevalent attitude people have towards BFing moms and it can be hurtful. not that you are doing this but so many other people comment on occasion that they think BFing is too sexually connected or just "gross". you cannot win i think whether you FF or BF
i think it is great you are even considering BFing and i
think it's a great attitude to say i'll try but not put all the importance in the world on it if it doesn't work out!

Message edited 5/29/2008 10:37:56 PM.

Re: ok... im stating MY OPINION HERE.... (long sorry)

Re: ok... im stating MY OPINION HERE.... (long sorry)

Thank you so much for posting this. I am in tears again tonight due to another clogged milk duct. I had 3 in a matter of 10 days when I was EBF and in so much pain with 103 fever and cracked bleeding nipples but all the propaganda by BF proponents made me feel like I HAD to continue or I was a bad mother. And I had low milk supply so DS did not gain any weight and I was furious at myself for NOT supplementing bc all the lactation consultants told me it would cause nipple confusion. All I have to say is BS, my baby was not gaining weight and I had to do what was best.

I now pump and supplement but with another clogged duct tonight I might just give up and FF completely. I cannot take care of DS when I am sick.

Kudos to those who are able to BF successfully, but not all of us can, and I hate being judged as a bad mom for not BF.

Thank you so much for posting this. I can go to sleep so much better knowing that I am not the only one bombarded by this pressure and guilt unneccessarily!!