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If you hate your house

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CouponKT
Our family is complete

Member since 6/06

16493 total posts

Name:
K

If you hate your house

I need a little support today Chat Icon

Long story short, I really hate my house. It's just too small for the five of us (me, DH and 3 kids). We don't have a yard, a basement or enough space to keep us sane. We have tried selling it and got nowhere. Tried renting it, but we can't find someplace else to go. I am at my wits end and I feel so stuck. I have been trying so hard to work our way out of it and it's just not happening. This morning, I am in tears about it and I can't snap out of it.

I go through my "woe is me" stage and I can't understand why we can't get what we want and feel like we work towards.

I guess misery loves company. Please tell me I am not the only one in this boat.Chat Icon

Posted 3/20/13 10:21 AM
 
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GoldenRod
20k

Member since 11/06

21888 total posts

Name:
Shawn

Re: If you hate your house

Can you add onto your house? If you don't have much yard, can you add a 2nd floor? Our house was getting cramped after DC #2, so I doubled the size of my house, and now I love it. Chat Icon

Posted 3/20/13 10:24 AM
 

CouponKT
Our family is complete

Member since 6/06

16493 total posts

Name:
K

Re: If you hate your house

no, it's a townhouse. No where to go.

Posted 3/20/13 10:29 AM
 

Lori Brewer - Daniel Gale Sotheby's International Realty
LIFamilies Business

Member since 1/13

134 total posts

Name:
Lori Brewer

If you hate your house

First, take a deep breath. I think most of us have days where the walls feel like they are closing in on us, no matter how big the home is. The chances of feeling that way double with each kid you have :) Secondly, there are A LOT of people who feel this way. Many people bought starter homes at the height of the market, with plans to upgrade in a few years and they are now stuck and feeling exactly the same way. It's so frustrating when you do everything right and circumstances out of your control keep you from getting where you want to be.

When you say you tried selling it and got nowhere, when did you try selling and what do you mean by getting nowhere? No showings? No offers? No offers high enough?

When you say you can't find somewhere else to go, do you mean that you can't find a home to rent that would fit your needs? Or that you can't get a mortgage without selling your home?

Like GoldenRod said, adding on may be an option, assuming you have somewhere to temporarily go during construction.

Posted 3/20/13 10:32 AM
 

CouponKT
Our family is complete

Member since 6/06

16493 total posts

Name:
K

Re: If you hate your house

Posted by Lori Brewer - Daniel Gale Sotheby's International Realty

First, take a deep breath. I think most of us have days where the walls feel like they are closing in on us, no matter how big the home is. The chances of feeling that way double with each kid you have :) Secondly, there are A LOT of people who feel this way. Many people bought starter homes at the height of the market, with plans to upgrade in a few years and they are now stuck and feeling exactly the same way. It's so frustrating when you do everything right and circumstances out of your control keep you from getting where you want to be.

When you say you tried selling it and got nowhere, when did you try selling and what do you mean by getting nowhere? No showings? No offers? No offers high enough?

When you say you can't find somewhere else to go, do you mean that you can't find a home to rent that would fit your needs? Or that you can't get a mortgage without selling your home?

Like GoldenRod said, adding on may be an option, assuming you have somewhere to temporarily go during construction.



It's so frustrating when you do everything right and circumstances out of your control keep you from getting where you want to be. YES YES YES!!!!!!! You understand me!!!!!!!

We had it on the market for over 6 months and had plenty of showings, but only 1 offer that was too low to accept.

I am willing to rent out my place and find another home to rent, but it seems that there aren't any in the area we are looking (Riveread/Baiting Hollow).

I am going to try to get a mortgage on a second home, but not sure how well that will fly.

Posted 3/20/13 10:38 AM
 

Beth
The Key to your new home....

Member since 2/06

24834 total posts

Name:
Beth

Re: If you hate your house

the rental income on your current home will count as income when you go apply for a mortgage- 75% of it

I see renting as your only option- I recently help a couple buy a bigger home- then I rented the condo they couldn't sell do to be underwater- it can be done

Posted 3/20/13 10:41 AM
 

Lori Brewer - Daniel Gale Sotheby's International Realty
LIFamilies Business

Member since 1/13

134 total posts

Name:
Lori Brewer

If you hate your house

Of course I understand. I've been there! :)

When you say too low to accept, too low to accept because of your existing mortgage? If so, have you thought about modifying your mortgage with the HAFA or other mortgage mod programs? That may allow you to be more flexible.

Do you know how much rent you could get for your townhome? Yes, the rental income does count, but I assume the problem would be timing (and Beth correct me if I'm wrong), in that to have the rental income count w mortgage, you have to have rented the home already so you can prove the income? If you have already rented the home, where would you live until you could find and close on a new home.


Posted 3/20/13 10:50 AM
 

CouponKT
Our family is complete

Member since 6/06

16493 total posts

Name:
K

Re: If you hate your house

Yes, too low to accept because of what we owe.

My Dad feels that the rental income may not be considered because we are not a "seasoned" renter. We haven't done it before, this is our first time.

We do have a place to go "in the meantime" but it's only temporary, not a place we can live long term.

Posted 3/20/13 10:56 AM
 

Beth
The Key to your new home....

Member since 2/06

24834 total posts

Name:
Beth

Re: If you hate your house

the signed lease is all the bank needs to count the rental as income

my buyers were able to get the mortgage with the prior mortgage (none of us are sure how that worked out- but it did in this case)

Posted 3/20/13 10:57 AM
 

CouponKT
Our family is complete

Member since 6/06

16493 total posts

Name:
K

Re: If you hate your house

Posted by Beth

the signed lease is all the bank needs to count the rental as income

my buyers were able to get the mortgage with the prior mortgage (none of us are sure how that worked out- but it did in this case)



thank you Beth, you are giving me hope!

Posted 3/20/13 11:01 AM
 

Beth
The Key to your new home....

Member since 2/06

24834 total posts

Name:
Beth

Re: If you hate your house

anything I can do to help let me know!

there is hope- and the market is changing- inventory is low- the market is completely different then it was 3 months ago

I would list again- even if it's just for 3 months- now is the time I would want my home on the market

Posted 3/20/13 11:03 AM
 

Century 21 Dallow - Christine Braun
LIFamilies Business

Member since 2/11

3158 total posts

Name:

Re: If you hate your house

Posted by CouponKT

Yes, too low to accept because of what we owe.

My Dad feels that the rental income may not be considered because we are not a "seasoned" renter. We haven't done it before, this is our first time.

We do have a place to go "in the meantime" but it's only temporary, not a place we can live long term.



Can you talk to a mortgage professional you trust to sort out the rental income issue? I know that for certain types of properties, you need a certain amount of equity before 75% of the rental income can count toward income.

I have a client who is trying to sell a co-op he bought at the top of the market. He explored the option of renting it and buying something else. However, with a co-op, an owner needs to have 30% equity in their current home in order to rent it out and count the rental income. Apparently, this rule was put in place to avoid a seller acting like they were going to rent out their current home, buying a new home, and then short selling the co-op once they got their second mortgage.

I don't know if that's the case with a town home, too, but I am sure different scenarios have different rules. I would definitely sit down with a loan officer to get the scoop on that.

Also, if you are truly unhappy, would you consider selling yourself, even if you break even or have to bring a little money to the table, and then renting for a year or so while you save up again and house hunt? Although it is painful to do that, prices aren't going to come up that fast. It may makes sense to just "rip the bandaid off," so to speak, and get out of this house, even if you can't buy again immediately. Plus, then you will have the luxury of taking your time to find another house, and will be a more desirable buyer with nothing to sell.

Hang in there! Chat Icon

Posted 3/20/13 12:44 PM
 

sfp0701
Liam's Mommy!

Member since 1/07

9393 total posts

Name:
Tricia

Re: If you hate your house

I totally know how you feel. We owe so much more than our house is worth. We bought a starter home (a 750 sq ft. cottage) at the peak of the market. And then we got stuck. We can't expand because we don't have equity and everytime we try to apply for one of those modication programs we don't qualify for some reason or another.

We literally and I mean literally CANNOT have a second child because of this home. There is not an inch of space because of the layout and my son's room won't even fit a twin bed. we have done what we can to make it nice and it's really cute but, it sucks so bad. It's 100 years old and the basement is an old cellar. There is a coal fireplace in it and it's not able to be used as living space without a lot of money dumped into it. I would love to expand but, we don't have the $$. I mean I would have to literally save about 50K in cash or more in order to expand. Who can do that?

We will be going to BFCU in a few months to explore some options but, I honestly feel that there are no options.

Posted 3/20/13 4:33 PM
 

ave1024
I Took The Wrong Road

Member since 12/07

5424 total posts

Name:
That Led To The Wrong Tendencies

Re: If you hate your house

Posted by Century 21 Dallow - Christine Braun

I have a client who is trying to sell a co-op he bought at the top of the market. He explored the option of renting it and buying something else. However, with a co-op, an owner needs to have 30% equity in their current home in order to rent it out and count the rental income. Apparently, this rule was put in place to avoid a seller acting like they were going to rent out their current home, buying a new home, and then short selling the co-op once they got their second mortgage.





I have heard similar things and it's not just co-ops that require equity. Even with a signed lease when I have talked with banks, they want to see equity in the renal property. Some banks also require at least a year of steady prior rental income before counting it.

There are just too many people out there who try to rent their first house to buy another that are just not qualified financially to carry two mortgages, even if their rental income covers the first house expenses. You always have to account for times when you won't have a tenant, or worse a malcontent non paying tenant.

I think the OP needs to do is talk to a morgage specialist to see if renting is even a possibility.

Posted 3/20/13 8:11 PM
 

SweetTooth
I'm a tired mommy!

Member since 12/05

20105 total posts

Name:
Lauren

Re: If you hate your house

We are in a similar situation. We're in a house, but have totally outgrown it. 5 people, 3 bedrooms, 1 bathroom, no basement, and no garage. When we bought we intended it to be our starter home, but then the next year... crash.
We owe more than the house is worth and we're stuck. It is very disheartening. We are talking about adding on, but I'd rather move than go through all that.

Posted 3/20/13 8:31 PM
 

CouponKT
Our family is complete

Member since 6/06

16493 total posts

Name:
K

Re: If you hate your house

Posted by SweetTooth

We are in a similar situation. We're in a house, but have totally outgrown it. 5 people, 3 bedrooms, 1 bathroom, no basement, and no garage. When we bought we intended it to be our starter home, but then the next year... crash.
We owe more than the house is worth and we're stuck. It is very disheartening. We are talking about adding on, but I'd rather move than go through all that.



I hear ya Chat Icon

Posted 3/20/13 8:53 PM
 

2BadSoSad
LIF Adult

Member since 8/12

4743 total posts

Name:

Re: If you hate your house

We're stuck in our starter home as well. Owe WAY more than its worth.

Posted 3/20/13 10:48 PM
 

Jacksmommy
My love muffin!

Member since 1/07

5270 total posts

Name:
Liz

Re: If you hate your house

We have the same problem. I spoke with a mortgage guy this week and he said he thinks the market is coming back around. It's very frustrating when the guy next door sold his house for 100k less than I bought mine for 6 years ago. It's like I threw money away!!! I don't even want to move. I would love to dormer my house and remortgage.

Posted 3/21/13 5:42 AM
 

KevinNKristin8-15-08
Round 2 with baby #2

Member since 9/08

5855 total posts

Name:
Kristin

Re: If you hate your house

Yep!!! I know how you feel. We're in our starter home and unfortunately we're stuck too. :(

I wanted to have been out of here already but here we are still 5 years later. When we bought we were hoping to sell and then upgrade, but crash!!!! We owe more than the house is worth.


While our home isn't really that small by any means, the layout is very weird and doesn't work well for a growing family. It seems so hopeless sometimes. And I hate this house; I really settled and shouldn't have. It sucks to see what we could have gotten if we waited to buy a house!!Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

The worst part is trying to find someone to help us sell. It's seems no realtors will help us.

We are looking into an extension right now or a remodel of some sort to change the layout. It seems like the only realistic option.

What helps me is to remind myself that at least we have a house and a roof over our head. There are so many people in a worse situation. And so many who want a house of their own and can't afford it. So I'm very thankful in that regard.

Many hugs though because I know exactly how you feel.
Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 3/21/13 1:36 PM
 

JDubs
2 years flew!

Member since 7/09

8795 total posts

Name:

Re: If you hate your house

I hear ya. I would like to sell but DH is against it, saying we would be out too much money. I like my house I just don't like the location (on a corner, busy street next to us) and didn't think about that when buying. Not to mention our taxes are sky high. Chat Icon

Posted 3/21/13 2:12 PM
 

BargainMama
LIF Adult

Member since 5/09

8124 total posts

Name:

If you hate your house

Do you have a second mortgage? If so, look into a cram down which eliminates the 2nd mortgage through a Chapter 7 or 13. The firm I used to work for did hundreds of successful cram downs.

Posted 3/22/13 7:49 AM
 

MrsM-6-7-08
<3

Member since 8/06

4049 total posts

Name:

Re: If you hate your house

Have you tried refinancing to a lower interest rate and shorter mortgage terms to aggressively pay down your mortgage faster

Since we have our mortgage we always paid extra every month then we refi'd to a 15 year with a low rate and have been aggressively paying an extra $500 a month towards principal. It makes a huge difference and we have made a huge dent in a year of refinancing

Posted 3/22/13 9:02 AM
 

MorningCuppaCoffee
Tired!

Member since 12/07

16005 total posts

Name:
Me

Re: If you hate your house

I've definitely had moments like that.

Then Sandy hit and I realized how happy I am to have my little house. (We had water to the ceiling of our basement).

Fortunately, DH works in construction so has been doing great with the hurricane so we are finally able to afford to make some upgrades.

It is what it is, because I can't imagine anyone wanting to buy here after Sandy.

Someone recently posted that people still buy in San Francisco, but I think an earthquake is less likely to happen vs. another hurricane.

That's probably going to be the next thing to hit LI!

Have you considered working with one of the REAs from this site? They seem to have magical powers when it comes to selling homes here on LI.

Posted 3/22/13 9:17 AM
 

MorningCuppaCoffee
Tired!

Member since 12/07

16005 total posts

Name:
Me

Re: If you hate your house

Posted by MrsM-6-7-08

Have you tried refinancing to a lower interest rate and shorter mortgage terms to aggressively pay down your mortgage faster

Since we have our mortgage we always paid extra every month then we refi'd to a 15 year with a low rate and have been aggressively paying an extra $500 a month towards principal. It makes a huge difference and we have made a huge dent in a year of refinancing




SIL just sold her house. It was on the market for less than a week. By paying extra each month, they made close to $100K on their sale. Chat Icon


I know unfortunately this is not affordable for everyone though, and she did live in a desirable area.

Posted 3/22/13 9:19 AM
 

TTCfirstbaby
LIF Infant

Member since 4/10

66 total posts

Name:
Melly

Re: If you hate your house

...

Message edited 5/3/2013 1:18:10 PM.

Posted 3/24/13 7:15 AM
 
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